Transcript
Okay, good morning. I lost my voice on שבועות Shavuos, so we'll see how far that we can get today. I want to have the opportunity to study פרשת נשא Parshas Naso together. So I don't know if we'll go a full hour, but we'll see how far we get in this incredibly rich and beautiful פרשה parsha. We'll begin as always with the overview, and then we'll talk about some specific points together.וידבר השם אל משה לאמר Vayedaber Hashem el Moshe leimor, on page 748 in the Artscroll Stone חומש Chumash, נשא את ראש בני גרשון גם הם לבית אבותם למשפחותם Naso es rosh bnei Gershon gam hem l'veis avosam l'mishpechosam. פרשת נשא Parshas Naso picks up where במדבר Bamidbar left off. במדבר Bamidbar began with a census. The book of במדבר Bamidbar is the book of numbers. It is the book of counting, a book of a census. We spoke last week that when each person passed before הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu, not only did Moshe count them, they felt counted. A person felt not invisible or inconsequential, but the person felt relevant, that they mattered. And the פרשה parsha picks up with the counting, continuing with the census and the count of the לויים Leviim. And it describes the different families. נשא את ראש בני גרשון Naso es rosh bnei Gershon. When you count someone, נשא naso, you lift את ראש es rosh, their head. A person who feels depressed, despondent, down, the person who feels irrelevant, feels invisible, walks with their head down. And when you use someone's name, when you lift their spirits, when you make them feel they matter, when they make them count, נשא את ראש naso es rosh, you literally, quite literally, you lift their head.The Torah then gives us the totals of of the family of לוי Levi who were counted separately. We've discussed in the past, why were they counted separately? Why couldn't they be included in the entire census? And the insight of Rav חיים סולובייצ'יק Chaim Soloveitchik, the notion that לוי Levi didn't violate הקדוש ברוך הוא's HaKadosh Baruch Hu's trust in the story of the חטא העגל chet ha'eigel. Because of that, they were counted separately. The rest of כלל ישראל Klal Yisrael were destined to suffer a punishment as a result. לוי Levi was not. So why couldn't לוי Levi still be counted among the rest of the Jewish people and not receive the punishment? הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu, the רבונו של עולם Ribono shel Olam, the Almighty, has the capacity to count and yet treat separately and differently. So Rav חיים סולובייצ'יק Chaim Soloveitchik explains that we are who we surround ourselves by and with. And if לוי Levi were to be counted among everyone else, even though they did not perpetrate the same crime, the same mistake, simply being present, identifying with, associating with people doing the wrong thing, also brings us down. It reflects negatively and poorly on us, it has an impact on us as well. And therefore לוי Levi needed to be counted separately in order not to suffer the same consequence. That's his idea. We are who we surround ourselves with. We just saw this last week when we have the יום המיוחס Yom HaMeyuchas, in between ראש חודש סיון Rosh Chodesh Sivan and the שלושת ימי הגבלה shloshes yemei hagbalah. The day in between the beginning of the new month and the three days in anticipation and preparation for שבועות Shavuos is also a day that we don't say תחנון Tachanun. It's also considered to be a special day. What's special about it? Absolutely nothing. So why is it a special day? Because it's between ראש חודש Rosh Chodesh and the שלושת ימי הגבלה shloshes yemei hagbalah. יום המיוחס Yom HaMeyuchas, its ייחוס yichus is who it's surrounded itself with. We are a composite. We are influenced by the people that we surround ourselves with. And therefore לוי Levi could not be counted among the rest of the, among the rest of the Jewish people.It says, the next פרק perek begins, פרק ה' Perek Hei, page 750. צו את בני ישראל וישלחו מן המחנה כל צרוע וכל זב וכל טמא לנפש Tzav es bnei Yisrael v'yeshalchu min hamachaneh kol tzarua v'chol zav v'chol tamei l'nafesh. Here the Torah delineates the different מחנות machanos, the different camps. We have these concentric circles of sanctity and holiness of the camps of the Jewish people, the different מחנות machanos. It's something which was established first in the desert with the משכן Mishkan, but then continued with the בית המקדש Beis HaMikdash in ירושלים Yerushalayim. The next section: וידבר השם אל משה לאמר דבר אל בני ישראל איש או אשה כי יעשו מכל חטאות האדם למעול מעל בהשם ואשמה הנפש ההיא Vayedaber Hashem el Moshe leimor daber el bnei Yisrael ish o ishah ki ya'asu mikol chatos ha'adam lim'ol ma'al baHashem v'ashmah hanefesh hahi. Hashem spoke to Moshe and he said, \"Speak to the Jewish people, a man or a woman who commits any of man's sins, כי יעשו מכל חטאות האדם למעול מעל בהשם ואשמה הנפש ההיא ki ya'asu mikol chatos ha'adam lim'ol ma'al baHashem v'ashmah hanefesh hahi.\" The person is guilty. What does have to do? So a person who commits a sin, makes a mistake, even though the section is introduced sort of generically with this ambiguous introduction, describing if a person does a sin and they're guilty, they have to confess. The section is talking about a specific sin, which is when a person steals from a convert, and the convert dies, to whom do they return the money? It's a specific sin, but it's described and it's introduced very generically because there's a critical principle that we have to understand. איש או אשה כי יעשו מכל חטאות האדם למעול מעל Ish o ishah ki ya'asu mikol chatos ha'adam lim'ol ma'al. What does that mean? So the חידושי הרי\"ם Chidushei HaRim explains, why is this the source והתודו את חטאתם v'hisvadu es chatasam? A person has to confess their mistake. We've described countless times the word חטא chet doesn't mean sin. Sin is not a Jewish word. חטא chet means a mistake. So a person made a mistake. They had poor judgment. They gave in to their urge. They weren't able to express or exert their will over their temptation. What do they have to do? They have to make an admission. They have to offer a confession. והתודו V'hisvadu. Why is גזל gezel, why is stealing the sin, which we just said we don't believe in the word sin. Why is גזל gezel, why is stealing the mistake in the Torah where the Torah introduces the idea והתודו v'hisvadu that one has to confess? The חידושי הרי\"ם Chidushei HaRim, the Gerrer Rebbe has a magnificent answer. He says at the root, at the core of every mistake that we make, at the root and the core of every חטא chet that we perpetrate, is גזל gezel, is the idea that we've stolen. From whom did we steal? If we eat without making a ברכה bracha, if we sleep in and we don't daven, if we are dishonest, if we are speak לשון הרע lashon hara, if we look at something we shouldn't look at, if we say, from whom have we stolen? The חידושי הרי\"ם Chidushei HaRim says we've stolen from the Almighty. He put us here on earth, he gave us life, he gave us faculties, he gave us capacity, he gave us time, he gave us resources. And when we take all of those things, whether it's our faculty, our good health, our very life, or the resources that he's given to us, and we misuse them and we abuse them, and we misdirect them, and we make mistakes with them, then we've stolen from God. What a gift to have the gift of time. What a blessing to have the gift of our faculties. And when we misuse, when we use our feet to run after an עבירה aveira, use our hands to perpetrate an עבירה aveira, use our eyes, ears, or tongue to do an עבירה aveira, to make a חטא chet, to make a mistake, we have violated גזל gezel. We have stolen from God. And that's why this notion of taking responsibility, of taking extreme ownership, of taking accountability, and the formula of והתודו v'hisvadu, the responsibility or obligation to confess, to acknowledge the mistake that we've made, is specifically given in the context of גזל gezel to tell us that every moment and every one of our faculties is a blessing from Hashem and to misuse them and abuse them is a form of stealing. It's a form of stealing. And that's why it's introduced with this specific word: כי יעשו מכל חטאות האדם למעול מעל ki ya'asu mikol chatos ha'adam lim'ol ma'al. What is the word מעילה meilah? We have a tractate מעילה Meilah that describes the terrible transgression, the severe transgression. מעילה Meilah is when you have sacred property that has been consecrated and dedicated for use in the בית המקדש Beis HaMikdash, in the משכן Mishkan, in the temple, and a person derives personal benefit from something that was deemed sacred, something that was dedicated as holy. Deriving personal benefit is called מעילה meilah. It is a severe transgression with a severe punishment. מעילה Meilah, the personal use of something sacred or holy. So the Torah here describes this גזל הגר gezel hager is מעילה meilah. Why? So again, the חידושי הרי\"ם Chidushei HaRim, the Salantchik said similarly, לה' הארץ ומלואה LaHashem ha'aretz u'melo'ah. To God belongs this world, this earth and everything in it. It's all His. Our life, our faculties, our capacity, our resources, it's all His. He gives it to us on loan. We are stewards of it and we are given to use it in a meaningful, purposeful way, to use it for a sacred purpose and responsibility. And when we misuse it, when we make have poor judgment, when we make mistakes, we've stolen from God, and we've also violated מעילה meilah. We live for holiness. We are here to live holy lives. And when we pursue the mundane and the profane, when we feed our own ego and temptations and desire, it is an act of מעילה meilah. We've misused our resources and we've misused our faculties just to derive pleasure and to satisfy our appetite and urges. That's למעול מעל בהשם lim'ol ma'al baHashem. We have perpetrated an act of מעילה meilah. We've taken something sacred, namely our lives, and we've misdirected them for the use of profane. That is the textbook definition of מעילה meilah. לה' הארץ ומלואה LaHashem ha'aretz u'melo'ah. Everything belongs to Hashem. We shouldn't misuse and abuse it to serve ourselves in a personal way for personal purposes.Okay, the Torah then goes on. And the next section, דבר אל בני ישראל ואמרת אליהם איש איש כי תשטה אשתו ומעלה בו מעל daber el Bnei Yisrael v'amarta aleihem ish ish ki siste ishto u'ma'alah bo ma'al. Interestingly, we have the exact same language again. At the bottom of page 752, we have the story of the סוטה sotah, the wayward woman. A woman who's accused of infidelity, sure, her husband suspects her and he warns her. Actually, let's go back before we move on to the סוטה sotah. I wanted to make one other point. This last section, 752. דבר אל בני ישראל איש או אשה כי יעשו מכל חטאות האדם למעול מעל Daber el Bnei Yisrael ish o ishah ki ya'asu mikol chatos ha'adam lim'ol ma'al. When it describes who is accountable for מעילה meilah, what is the name of the individual, the description of the individual that we use to say you were given blessings and you misused them and you violated מעילה meilah, you've profaned something sacred? We have a lot of terms: גבר gever, אדם adam, אנוש enosh, איש ish, but what term does the Torah use here? It uses the word איש ish. And our Rabbis understand, I spoke about this over שבועות Shavuos, just to review a little bit, because I think most of you weren't there. Our Rabbis understand that the use of the term איש ish here means at what age is one accountable and responsible? At what age do we hold someone that they had the maturity, the sophistication, that they had the wherewithal to be responsible for their actions, for their choices, to exert their will over their temptation? At the age of 12 and 13. 12 for a girl, 13 for a boy. How do we know that? So our rabbis derive it from the use of the word איש ish right here in this in this section, and the use of the word איש ish elsewhere. See, the Torah tells us in בראשית ל\"ד Bereishis lamed-daled, the story of שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi, the two brothers of דינה Dinah, who when דינה Dinah was kidnapped and raped by שכם Shechem, שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi concocted a brilliant plan in order to assassinate, to eliminate, in order to defeat and to pay back with great retribution the people of שכם Shechem, שכם Shechem and the people of שכם Shechem for what they had done. Of course they tell them, \"We're more than happy to intermarry with you, but you need to have a ברית bris. It's a פסול pasul for us to marry people who are uncircumcised. You have to get a ברית bris.\" And after your ברית bris, perfect. So the whole community gets a ברית bris and the third day when they're the most vulnerable and the weakest, שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi strike. And Yaakov's not happy about what they did, felt he put the Jewish people in a compromised position. Now they were a target. But we look back with a certain sense of pride or nostalgia on that story. What a יידישע קאפ Yiddishe kop, what a great plan that they had, a great military operation. There's other questions we've discussed in the past on this section: collective punishment, was it really right to take it out on everyone when it was only one or the few who perpetrated the rape against דינה Dinah. But nonetheless, שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi rise to protect the honor of their sister, to liberate their sister, and they pay back שכם Shechem and their people. How old were שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi at that time? So Rashi tells us, Rashi on פרקי אבות Pirkei Avos and Rashi on the גמרא נזיר Gemara Nazir, daf kaf-tes, Rashi tells us we have a tradition שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi were 13. You'll ask, \"How could שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi both be 13?\" So some do the calculation, the תוספות יום טוב Tosafos Yom Tov in his commentary on פרקי אבות Pirkei Avos, does the calculation and says שמעון Shimon was 13, לוי Levi was only 12, others suggest there was an overlapping year where they were both 13. But whatever the case may be, we have a tradition, says Rashi, they were 13 years old. And how does the Torah describe them? שמעון ולוי אחי דינה איש חרבו ויבאו על העיר בטח ויהרגו כל זכר Shimon v'Levi achei Dinah ish charbo vayavo'u al ha'ir betach vayihargu kol zachar. איש Ish, each one of them girded themselves, they took the sword and they went and they defended their sister's honor. And what word is used to describe them? איש Ish. And Rashi says, why the word איש ish? Because they were בר מצווה bar mitzvah. They were a גדול gadol, they were 13 years old. So we have the tradition they were 13. The Torah uses the word איש ish and it uses the word איש ish in our section as well: איש או אשה כי יעשו מכל חטאות האדם למעול מעל ish o ishah ki ya'asu mikol chatos ha'adam lim'ol ma'al. At what age are we accountable for violating the sacred, holy life that God has given us, our faculties and the resources, the blessings we have? When you are an איש ish. So you see from here that בר מצווה bar mitzvah is 13. אשה ishah בת מצווה bat mitzvah is at 12. And in fact, what's what the Mishnah in פרקי אבות Pirkei Avos tells us, בן שלוש עשרה למצוות ben shlosh esrei l'mitzvos. At 13 years old, one is held accountable for מצוות mitzvos. The ר\"ש Rash disagrees. רבנו אשר Rabbeinu Asher writes in a תשובה teshuva that the age of בר and בת מצווה bar and bat mitzvah is הלכה למשה מסיני halacha l'Moshe m'Sinai. It's not derived from the Torah, not from the reference to שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi being an איש ish and the איש ish in our פרשה parsha in נשא Naso, but it's הלכה למשה מסיני halacha l'Moshe m'Sinai. We simply have a tradition that Moshe descended from the mountain with the message that that's the age that one is mature, that's the age that one is responsible and can be held responsible. All of the מדרש בראשית רבה Midrash Bereishis Rabbah tells us from another place. It says of Avraham ויגדל הילד ויגמל vayigdal hayeled vayigamal, that Avraham raised Yitzchak. Yitzchak grew older, ויגדל vayigdal, ויגמל vayigamal. So which is it? ויגדל Vayigdal sounds like he became a גדול gadol. He became the age of majority. ויגמל Vayigamal sounds like he was weaned. Being weaned sounds one is weaned from nursing, a baby, an infant. Which is it? So the מדרש Midrash says, Rabbi Oshaya Rabbah said, נגמל מיצר הרע nigmal mi'yetzer hara. It means ויגדל vayigdal, he became a בר מצווה bar mitzvah. What are you weaned from at בר מצווה bar mitzvah? The immaturity, the self-centeredness, the narcissism. A little baby only cares about themselves. A little baby wants to eat when it wants to eat, needs its diaper changed when it needs its diaper changed, and wakes its parents at the whole night long, gives nothing, takes everything, and that hopefully dissipates from being a newborn. And the goal is that we mature, and as we grow, we transition from self-centered, egotistical, narcissistic newborn babies that the world revolves around us with no consideration for anyone else. And hopefully we transition so that by the age of בר מצווה bar mitzvah and בת מצווה bat mitzvah, it entirely inverts itself, where now we're selfless, where now we are capable of caring about other people and putting their needs and their interests first. ויגמל Vayigamal, what was he weaned from? He was weaned from an attitude of everything revolves around me. That happens at 12 or 13, and then in the teenage years, you go back to being an infant and a newborn and a baby and thinking the world revolves around you again. And then hopefully you grow out of that again and you can realize that the world is not just about you. The גמרא סנהדרין Gemara Sanhedrin suggests that בר and בת מצווה bar and bat mitzvah from another place, not our פרשה parsha, איש או אשה ish o ishah, that you see 13 is an איש ish, is a man, is a woman, or maybe it doesn't think from a different place, but it tells us anatomically, biologically, the body itself communicates, the body testifies to our capacity for responsibility at that age. The גמרא Gemara says that it's at 13 that a boy can father a child. It's at 12 that a young lady can conceive a child. And says the גמרא Gemara, if your body has the capacity to take this ultimate responsibility of creating a human being, of the continuity of humanity, if your body is capable, is mature, that means your soul, your heart, and your mind are mature as well. And Rav Volbe and Eli Shua write, very beautifully, that every person needs to know that from the moment his reproductive organs begin to develop, he's no longer living in a personal, private state of existence. The very fact that we have the capacity to reproduce means we can care about another. So the whole notion that איש ish, אשה ishah is an age in which we can care about another, that we transition from self-centeredness to selflessness, the body itself is saying that. You're the age that you can conceive a child. That means you're the age you can care about someone else. You can literally produce, reproduce someone else and you can care about someone else. And if your body says you can care about someone else, then know that your heart, your mind, your soul should also communicate that you can care about someone else as well. Why is a בת מצווה bat mitzvah a year earlier than a בר מצווה bar mitzvah? So the תורה תמימה Torah Temimah, Rav Boruch Halevi Epstein says that of course, women, young girls, mature before boys. Ask any middle school teacher and they'll tell you who teaches both genders that girls certainly mature both physically as well as emotionally and intellectually before boys do. The Rambam has a different reason. The Rambam says women have a shorter lifespan than men and therefore their life is on an accelerated track so they mature earlier, their בת מצווה bat mitzvah is earlier. I'll tell you something fascinating. Today, in the 21st century, women outlive men in every single country in the world. Life expectancy for ladies is 81.2 years and for men is 76.4 years. But the studies that prove this also say it's a relatively recent phenomenon beginning just in the 20th century. The Rambam was right in his time, probably because women died in childbirth and for other reasons. But in his time he was right. It is a difference and we're blessed to live in another time. You know why men die before women? Because they want to. Okay. Beyond you'd say the bad joke. Good. Beyond you'd say the bad joke. There's a lot more to say about this. I want to get back to our פרשה parsha, but I'll just end this part, איש או אשה כי מעל מעל בהשם ish o ishah ki ma'al ma'al baHashem, this idea that at בר and בת מצווה bar and bat mitzvah at 12 and at 13, we are an איש and אשה ish and ishah. We are a man or a woman. Not by American law standards. You can't vote or drink or drive or own a gun, but from Jewish standards, to count in a מנין minyan, to be responsible for one's own actions, this is reflected in the ברכה bracha, ברוך שפטרני Baruch Sheptarani, a father says. We've spoken about another time, why do we only make that ברכה bracha on a בר מצווה bar mitzvah and not on a בת מצווה bat mitzvah? Only for a boy, not for a girl. But we've seen this notion of celebrating one's בר מצווה bar mitzvah, one's בת מצווה bat mitzvah, celebrating adulthood means that we have the capacity and we change from inward to outward to caring about other people. The Lubavitcher Rebbe ZT\"L points out, when שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi are 13, what do they do? They rise to defend their sister. What it means to be a גדול gadol, a קטן katan only cares about themselves. The גדול gadol, what it means to be a גדול gadol, what it means to be mature is to see the pain and the suffering of others and to want to intervene, to want to relieve some of that pain. There are unfortunately גדולים gedolim who act like קטנים ketanim. We have adults who are acting like children in this way. There are extraordinary children who act like adults long before their בר or בת מצווה bar or bat mitzvah, who have that capacity to care about other people. But we see the definition of בר and בת מצווה bar and bat mitzvah, the difference between a קטן katan and a גדול gadol, between being a minor and the age of majority, between being a kid and being an adult, the difference is our capacity to care for other people. שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi rise to defend their sister. We see it also with Moshe. It says ויגדל vayigdal that he gets, becomes a גדול gadol, ויצא אל אחיו vayeitzei el achav. ויגדל משה ויצא אל אחיו Vayigdal Moshe vayeitzei el achav. He becomes a גדול gadol. What does it mean to be a גדול gadol? What does it mean to be the age of majority? ויצא אל אחיו Vayeitzei el echav. It means to go out to one's brothers. It means to care. It means to see the pain of another. It means to intervene on their behalf. It means to relieve some of that pain. That's what it means to be a גדול gadol. And that's what it should mean for us to be a גדול gadol as well.Rav Schechter points out, the גמרא Gemara references one of the great rabbis, שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan. It calls him שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan. He wasn't short. He wasn't vertically challenged. I'm supposed to say today. שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan. Why was he called שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan? So we know that after the 18 ברכות brachos were established that we have as our שמונה עשרה Shemoneh Esrei, the rabbis deemed it necessary to establish a 19th ברכה bracha in order to combat the צדוקים Tzedukim, the Sadducees, these other sects that were distorting our sacred tradition. That we daven ולמלשינים v'lamalshinim, those who are our enemies, our adversaries, those who are distorting our truth, those who are against us. But who could they get to compose it? Such a sacred text that would be used in perpetuity by the Jewish people, the עמידה Amidah, the שמונה עשרה Shemoneh Esrei, whom could they tap to be able to compose it? So they understood that they they had to ask שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan. Why? Because שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan was the one, the Mishnah in Avos tells us, he would always repeat, בנפול אויבך אל תשמח binfol oyvecha al tismach. Don't be overjoyed by the fall of your enemy. Someone who got a גישמאק geshmak, a joy, a pleasure. What's the German word for that? For when you when you get pleasure out of other people's downfall? Schadenfreude or something like that? There's a there's a German word. So someone who got pleasure out of someone else's pain, they couldn't have the purity of thought to compose such a ברכה bracha, bless you. It had to be שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan because he was the one who regularly said, בנפול אויבך אל תשמח binfol oyvecha al tismach, one should not be joyed by the fall of their enemy. He was innocent, he was pure, he was kind, he was good. And therefore he was the one who with the right sincerity and the right motive could compose that 19th ברכה bracha of ולמלשינים v'lamalshinim. So Maran Harav Rav Schechter points out, he was called שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan. Why was he called שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan? Was this some kind of demeaning label, שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan? Like he was a נער naar, he talked like someone, you're a נער naar, נער'ישקייט naarishkeit. God forbid, God forbid. He was called שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan, even when he was an old man, he was called הקטן hakatan, because we always associate a child has an innocence and a purity and an optimism and a hope and sees the goodness in others. And then you become an adult and you think you're supposed to become cynical and sarcastic and hardened and pessimistic and see the negative in everyone and in everything. שמואל Shmuel, even as an adult, remained שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan. He was able even as an adult to have the outlook on life of a קטן katan. And so on the one hand, we want to become a גדול gadol, mature, responsible, sophisticated, more advanced. On the one hand, we should become a גדול gadol ויצא אל אחיו vayetzay el echav as the Lubavitcher Rebbe said, to be a גדול gadol means like שמעון ולוי Shimon v'Levi, to see the pain of another and to relieve that pain on the one hand. On the other hand, we should be like שמואל הקטן Shmuel HaKatan and remain a קטן katan in our innocence, purity, optimism, hope, and seeing the good in everyone around us. So all this comes from our פרשה parsha, איש או אשה ish o ishah. When are you כי יעשו מכל חטאות האדם למעול מעל בהשם ki ya'asu mikol chatos ha'adam lim'ol ma'al baHashem, when are you responsible, says the חידושי הרי\"ם Chidushei HaRim, it's גזל gezel, it's מעילה meilah. הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu gave you faculties and blessings and capacity, he gave us life, he gave us resources, and we use it for חטא chet. That's מעילה meilah. We're taking the holy opportunities that we have and we're squandering them, we're wasting them, we're misusing and abusing them. That's גזל gezel, we've stolen from Hashem. לה' הארץ ומלואה LaHashem ha'aretz u'melo'ah. And it's מעילה meilah. We take something with the capacity for sacredness and holiness and we make it profane. And it's a perfect segue because that same word מעילה meilah is used to describe the story of the סוטה sotah. דבר אל בני ישראל ואמרת אליהם איש איש כי תשטה אשתו ומעלה בו מעל daber el Bnei Yisrael v'amarta aleihem ish ish, sorry, ish ish ki siste ishto u'ma'alah bo ma'al. A man, כי תשטה אשתו ki siste ishto, whose wife goes astray, ומעלה בו מעל u'ma'alah bo ma'al, and she commits מעילה meilah against him. One second, I thought מעילה meilah is only against God. tractate מעילה meilah is all about, we have things dedicated for holy purposes, and we use them for personal reasons, that's מעילה meilah. So why is the story of סוטה sotah introduced with the words כי מעלה בו מעל ki ma'alah bo ma'al? Where's the מעילה meilah in the story of the סוטה sotah? And the answer is obvious and simple. What's the word that we use to describe marriage? נישואין Nisuin, the other word. קידושין Kidushin. הרי את מקודשת לי Harei at mekudeshes li. We wrote about in the שבועות Shavuos digest, the last article is the notion that if a person says הרי את מקודשת harei at mekudeshes, they're not married. It has to be הרי את מקודשת לי harei at mekudeshes li. We have to give over ourselves. We have to be personally invested, we have to be personally present. We also spoke about on שבועות Shavuos, Gottman and Chapman, the love languages and absent presence and dating before and dating during marriage. הרי את מקודשת לי Harei at mekudeshes li, I'm giving you me. Giving you my time, my affection, my acts of service, whatever your love language. If you just say מקודשת mekudeshes, you're not married. It has to be הרי את מקודשת לי harei at mekudeshes li, to me. I'm giving you myself, I'm making myself vulnerable. I'm intertwining our lives and our destiny. I'm sharing everything, literally and figuratively, physically and emotionally, I'm sharing with you. You have me, מקודשת לי mekudeshes li. And when a person does that with another, makes them entirely vulnerable, exposes oneself in every which way, invests in the other, to violate that trust, to violate that relationship, that vulnerability, is an act of מעילה meilah. Marriage is קידושין kidushin, הרי את מקודשת harei at mekudeshes. It's holy, it's sacred. And when a person violates marriage, violates trust, it's מעלה בו מעל ma'alah bo ma'al, it's מעילה meilah. To take something holy and to misuse it and abuse it, bless you. To take something holy and to make it profane, that is the dictionary definition of מעילה meilah, of מעל ma'al. Now it's very, very interesting. Very, very interesting. Now you're wondering what I'm about to say, what's so very, very interesting. The Torah says, איש איש ish ish. What, do we get a stutter all of a sudden? It's redundancy, איש איש ish ish. It should say, איש כי תשטה אשתו ish ki siste ishto. A man whose wife goes astray, ומעלה בו מעל u'ma'alah bo ma'al, and violates the sacred nature of the relationship. Why איש איש ish ish twice? Why does it say איש איש ish ish twice? So I'll say something maybe a little controversial, but some of the מפרשים mefarshim point out, some of the ראשונים rishonim, איש איש ish ish, what led her astray? What led her to look elsewhere? What set her on the path of seeking emotional satisfaction or romantic satisfaction elsewhere? איש איש Ish ish. Because he asserted himself too much. He was overpowering, demanding, abusive. He asserted himself and his masculinity and his dominance too much. He tried to dominate the relationship, איש איש ish ish. And the result of איש איש ish ish, not to justify, not to excuse, not to forgive, but to understand. איש איש Ish ish, his dominance of איש איש ish ish led to כי תשטה אשתו ki siste ishto. I share this because, and I've shared this in other contexts. Um, so I'm just repeating something that we've shared before, but I think it's very relevant here, is, um, there's a great therapist, Esther Perel. She's a best-selling author, and she has a famous TED talk. I mentioned it before. I don't know if anyone watched it or looked it up after the last time where she talks about millions of views, how a couple comes back from infidelity. And she talks about that within the infidelity, which is inexcusable and intolerable, unbearably painful, one should be held accountable for. All of that is a given. But within the infidelity is the revelation of what was missing in the marriage. Not that that's the path to discover it, not that it's excusable or acceptable, but if one understands or tries to understand what happened in a way to learn about what went wrong or what was missing, one can actually come back from infidelity with a stronger marriage than ever. It's the theme of her TED talk, it's the theme of her best-selling book, and it's the theme of her successful counseling in which she has achieved that. And I have seen that myself in counseling, that if addressed with an effort and a desire to reconcile, to learn and to grow, and there has to be a lot of accountability for pain that was caused, one discovers. And I think that's really exactly the פשט pshat in this פסוק pasuk. איש איש כי תשטה אשתו Ish ish ki siste ishto. איש איש Ish ish, it's inexcusable. For this man, he bears unbearable pain that his wife did this. And there's nothing he could have done that would justify her behavior, ever, ever. But now what? Do they use the experience to understand, hey, you were an איש איש ish ish, you were dominating, and that dominance created that result, or she has a line. She says, \"Most people who...\" will be married more than once. The only question is, will it be to the same person or another person? That's the theme. Most people will be married more than once. Will it be to the same person or another person? How we react and how we recover, one can be left with a better marriage than ever, or it can dissolve and fall apart. איש איש Ish ish. When he dominates and when he bears responsibility for what he did in that relationship. So the text here tells us the story of what happens. He suspects her, he therefore warns her, don't seclude yourself again with a man. She secludes herself and she has two witnesses that she has secluded herself, and afterwards she's brought to drink from the מיים המאררים mayim ha-me’arerim. She has to drink from this water that contains השם Hashem's name that's dissolved. השם Hashem himself is willing to allow his own name to be erased in the name of preserving שלום בית shalom bayis. So important to השם Hashem, so sacred to השם Hashem is שלום בית shalom bayis. He's willing to allow his own name to be erased. She drinks, if she's guilty, she dies a horrific death. If she's innocent, she receives an enormous blessing. What's the blessing that she receives? She receives fertility, she's able to bear children. It's the opposite of the סוטה sotah. רש\"י Rashi says, she drinks the water in the בית המקדש Beis Hamikdash and she didn't sin, she, if she used to give birth with pain, now she gives birth easily. This is the גמרא Gemara. If she used to have girls... If she used to have children with one complexion, now she has children with a nice complexion. If she used to have children who were short, now she doesn't have to spend money on the growth hormone, she gives birth to tall children. She used to give birth every two years, now she gives birth every year. She used to give birth to one, now she'll give birth to twins. I'm not sure all of these are considered blessings by everybody. But the גמרא Gemara in ברכות Brachos למד א Lamed Aleph sees them as ברכות brachos. According to a second opinion, it just means a woman who's barren will now have children, will now have children. In fact, if you remember, חנה Chana had עזות דקדושה azus de-kedusha. חנה Chana had a holy חצפה chutzpah. And when she went and she was דאווענען davening to השם Hashem, misunderstood by שמואל Shmuel as being intoxicated and drunk, what was she saying to השם Hashem with her holy חצפה chutzpah? She says, “Look, give me a child, and if you don't, I'm going to seclude myself with a man. My husband will suspect me. I'll come to drink the מיים המאררים mayim ha-me’arerim, but I will have been innocent, and you're going to give me a child either way. So give me a child and spare both of us having to go through that procedure and my husband the pain.” But it was considered, she has עזות דקדושה azus de-kedusha. That's considered a holy חצפה chutzpah that she had, taking the laws of the סוטה sotah and manipulating them, leveraging them for her own advantage towards, towards השם Hashem. So the question is famously asked on this. You know, if she violated her husband's trust and in fact, she had infidelity, I understand she suffers a grotesque, graphic, horrific death. If she didn't, why does she get any reward or blessing at all? This is a great question. Why does she get any blessing at all? She did something wrong. He said, “Don't seclude yourself.” She secluded herself. She secluded herself. It turns out while they were in seclusion, which was witnessed, while they were in seclusion, they didn't cross a line, but she secluded herself when she was told not to. She violated the law of יחוד yichud. So why does she get some blessing, some ברכה bracha? What she should have is, “You're off the hook. You're not going to die, you're not going to implode or collapse. Get out, walk away quickly because you barely escaped.” Why is she blessed with an amazing blessing? Anyone? It's a good question? What? She didn't cross the line. Oh. So the בית ישראל Beis Yisrael answers, many answer, it's an amazing, amazing idea. The בית ישראל Beis Yisrael answers, you see that for the רבונו של עולם Ribono Shel Olam, even when we've made many, many, many mistakes leading up to another mistake, but we stop, we stop short, we express our will, we're able to control ourselves with a sense of discipline before we make one more mistake, that too is precious to הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu. That too is precious to השם Hashem. So you spent an hour and a half telling לשון הרע lashon hara to your friend, and you had one more piece of really juicy, delicious, incredible לשון הרע lashon hara, but at that moment your conscience kicked in and you said, “You know, עד כאן מספיק ad kan maspik. I've shared enough. I don't want to gossip anymore.” הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu showers you with ברכה bracha. And he says, “I don't only love you when you didn't make a mistake to begin with. I love you when you've made many mistakes, but even at that point.” Because there, it's the hardest. Because an hour and a half in, you say, “I am such a reject. I am so distant from השם Hashem. I lack such self-control. I'm already in such trouble. What's one more piece of juicy לשון הרע lashon hara?” I spent an hour looking at the wrong things on the internet, what's three more images? I spent an hour eating the wrong things, what's one more bite? It's when we're deep in that we think what's the difference? I've already given it all up. I've already lost all merit. I'm already due all punishment that I might as well do a little more. Comes the Torah and says, no. She couldn't contain herself, she secluded herself. She had been warned, she secluded herself nonetheless. And there are witnesses who testified. But even in seclusion, she showed the discipline not to cross that line. That too is precious and beloved to הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu. It's a very important message for our children and for ourselves, that we're living in a world of temptation and desire, and we struggle, and it's hard not to cross a line in any of the areas of יצר הרע yetzer hara that we're talking about. And oftentimes we cross that line and then we give up on ourselves and we say, “I'm clearly not a person who can abstain from X. I eat that, I look at that, I say that, I go there. I can't.” And we need to know that for הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu, even the smallest amount of exerting our discipline and our will is precious, is beloved, and is worthy of great blessing. Yes, she secluded herself, but she stopped short of crossing that line. And for that, she deserves great blessing. Aye, she shouldn't have secluded herself? True. And there's accountability for that. But the fact that despite secluding yourself, she stopped before she crossed the line, that to הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu is worthy, is beautiful, and is deserving of great blessing. You know, even secluding herself is a big problem. We're living in an age that not only are physical infidelity a problem, but emotional infidelity is a very big problem. Going back to the Esther Perel, first of all, sometimes for the other spouse, the emotional infidelity could be even more painful than a physical poor judgment, mistake, lapse of judgment. Emotional is even more because one's giving of themselves, making themselves vulnerable, emotionally connecting with someone else. It's more dangerous because the person thinks, “I haven't crossed a line,” if it's only an emotional infidelity, an emotional affair. But that's what this woman is guilty of. She secludes herself, which means literally and figuratively, she's secluding herself. She's willing to open up and make herself vulnerable. But going back to the message of the Esther Perel, איש איש ish ish, maybe she found someone with a listening ear, a sympathetic ear. She found someone with a non-judgmental ear, she found someone she could confide in that she didn't have at home because he was איש איש ish ish. That's not to defend the behavior, that's not to excuse the behavior, that's not to tolerate that behavior, I can't be more clear about that. But it's to say that from those moments there are things that can be learned that can help the recovery process and one can not only recover, one can grow even, even stronger as a result. Even stronger as a result.So the Torah gives us the detailed formula, what happens? She's brought to the כהן kohen in the בית המקדש Beis Hamikdash, she offers a sacrifice, the כהן kohen prepares the special mixture, she drinks. The entire process is not only unusual, but it seems unfair. Because if two kosher witnesses testify they saw something, then we act. And if not, we presume innocence. And here, the only thing the witnesses saw was that she was secluded. So why does she have to drink to begin with? On whom is the burden of proof? What happened innocent until proven guilty? She comes out of the room and she says, “Yes, we were in the room and the door was locked. He was helping me with my computer problems. We were playing chess with one another. I was talking to him because I find he listens more sympathetically than anyone else. But we didn't touch each other, we didn't cross that line, nothing more happened.” So why don't we say innocent till proven guilty? Why is she schlepped to the בית המקדש Beis Hamikdash, to the משכן Mishkan, and she has to bring a קרבן korban, and she uncovers her head. This is actually the Torah מקור mokor for the הלכה halachic obligation for a married woman to cover her hair from the fact that the סוטה sotah, her head is uncovered, it suggests that the whole time she's married, it was covered. Why do we do all this to her with the assumption that she was unfaithful? With the presumption that she had an affair? Why don't we rely on the legal principle that, bless you, innocent until proven guilty. So Rav Yaakov Kaminetsky, זצ\"ל zatzal, whose son Rav Nosson Kaminetsky just passed away on שבועות Shavuos. We're in the midst of his שבעה shiva. So in his ספר אמת ליעקב Sefer Emes L'Yaakov, Rav Yaakov Kaminetsky says that our assumption is all wrong. We approach this פרשה parsha with the assumption that if she secluded herself, she must be guilty. And the reason that she's drinking this is to confirm her guilt. Hold her accountable. Pay her back. Says Rav Yaakov, not so. The Torah is actually assuming the exact opposite. The Torah is assuming she's innocent. Aye, if she's innocent, why does she have to make the mate of the משכן Mishkan and bring a קרבן korban and uncover her head and drink this water? So listen to what Rav Yaakov says. טבע האדם הוא, שם נכנס בליבו איזו מן חשד על אשתו, שוב לא יצא הספק מליבו לעולם, אלא אם כן הקדוש ברוך הוא בכבודו ובעצמו מבטיח לו שאמנם היא טהורה Teva ha'adam hu, she'im nichnas b'libo eizo min chashad al ishto, shuv lo yeitzei ha'safek milibo l'olam, ella im kein HaKadosh Baruch Hu b'chvodo u'v'atzmo mavtiach lo she'omnam hi tehorah. Says Rav Yaakov, a person's nature is that once there's suspicion, it's difficult to regain trust, and trust is the basis of any healthy relationship. Since השם Hashem knows this relationship can't be repaired unless trust is restored. The גמרא Gemara tells us, גדול השלום בין איש לאשתו, שהתורה אמרה שמו של הקדוש ברוך הוא שנכתב ימחה על המים gadol ha'shalom bein ish l'ishto, she'ha'Torah amrah shmo shel HaKadosh Baruch Hu she'nichtav yimache al ha'mayim, as we said, הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu was so committed to this marriage surviving. The מזבח mizbeach sheds a tear for every marriage that doesn't survive. השם Hashem is so devoted to this marriage surviving, he lets his own name be erased in the process of proving her innocence. So the whole process, as Rav Yaakov, he's flipped this whole סוגיא sugya on its head. It's not to prove her guilt, it's to try to convince the husband of her innocence. Because she comes out of that locked room and she says, “Look, yes, we were alone and we were secluded, and we violated your warning, but nothing happened.” He will spend the rest of his life not knowing, not believing. And it takes השם Hashem himself, it takes the Almighty himself performing a miracle to prove that in fact, nothing happened. That's how suspicious we become. And that's how much suspicion undermines a healthy relationship. And that's our responsibility in a world in which we no longer have the option of the מיים המאררים mayim ha-me’arerim to avoid behavior which could lead to a suspicion, a suspicion that could never ever be resolved. Yes. Isn't it an assumption that the woman actually wants to have a child with him? Yeah. That's a good question. We said the ברכה bracha is that she had, she was barren, she'll have children. If she had every two years, she'll have every year. If she had only one, she'll have multiples. If she had girls, she'll have boys. Who says she wants to be married to him? He put her through it. So, I think it's exactly in the model of the Esther Perel. Everyone should go watch her Ted talk. Just Google Esther Perel Ted talk. But it's exactly in that model. He put her through it, but she also put him through it. How did they get into this mess to begin with? כי תשטה אשתו Ki siste ishto. Because he says, “Look, I find that you're texting a lot, I find that you're talking a lot, I find that you're socializing a lot with this other guy. I'm uncomfortable with it. I don't like where it's going. Don't be alone with him.” And then two witnesses come and say, “Saw your wife with that guy.” So he says, “We got to go to the בית המקדש Beis Hamikdash to resolve this.” So who's putting whom through it? Did he put her through it? Did she put him through it? So the Torah, that's exactly what Rav Yaakov Kaminetsky's saying is, the Torah comes here and says, “They'll be in a gridlock, they'll be stuck, they'll be blaming one another. Why are you so suspicious of me? Can't I be alone with a guy and we do business or or we talk about news and sports? And can't you believe me that nothing happened?” And he says, “Why would you put me through this to create such suspicion? Why are you alone? It's inappropriate. You're violating the boundaries of modesty just being alone.” And they'll be stuck unless God himself comes and performs a miracle to resolve it, to prove that nothing happened. And hopefully, in the aftermath of that, that can allow them and enable them to now heal, where she says, “You know why I was alone with him? Because איש איש ish ish, you dominate me, and I don't have room to breathe, and you don't give me the passwords to our bank accounts, and don't give me access to our finances, and you don't…” Again, I'm not excusing any behavior or explaining any behavior. I'm simply… It's an indictment on both of them. Right, it's an indictment on both. איש איש Ish ish was a problem, כי תשטה אשתו ki siste ishto was a problem. הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu says, “Let me resolve it. Now you go back and do the hard work. And if you do it, you'll be married more than once, but to the same person. And if you don't do it, it's the end.” Men are allowed to do anything they want? Anything we want. Because the rabbis hate women, so we could do anything we want. I'm just joking. We're not allowed to do anything we want. And of course, it is a gross violation of a woman's trust and of the institution of קידושין kiddushin for a man. It's a terrible, gross violation. Men are obligated equally, if not more, to be loyal and to have fidelity. However, there's a fundamental difference. A man biblically can be married to more than one woman. A woman cannot be married to more than one man. And so if a woman has infidelity, then the relationship is over, because the הלכה halacha is, she's אסור בין לבעל בין לבועל assur bein la'baal bein la'boel. She's not allowed to live with either her husband or with the one with whom she had the affair. But if a man, it's grotesque, it's wrong, it's a violation of trust, but technically speaking, he would be allowed more than one wife, and therefore there's a different consequence. He doesn't get tested with a מיים המאררים mayim ha-me’arerim. Again, understand biologically there's a fundamental difference. When it comes to a child, we know a child's mother by definition, the womb he emerged from is his mother. But how do we know a father? That's why a woman can't have more than one husband, but a husband could have more than one wife. For that reason and others, Rabbi Angel was here, Rabbi Chaim Angel for his scholar in residence several weeks ago, and he spoke about that as a paradigm of several he wanted to offer where the Torah tolerated something but didn't endorse it. So the Torah tolerated polygamy in antiquity without actually endorsing it. And then it caught up when רבנו גרשום Rabeinu Gershom in around the year 1000 instituted, at least for אשכנזים Ashkenazim, that polygamy was forbidden for men as well. And we continue to practice that is binding on us until today. Yes. He also suffers. He also suffers a horrific death. She drinks the water and it has an impact on him. If in fact they were guilty, not only does she die, he dies. In fact, it's brought down, I forgot which Rebbe. He says this is the מקור makor of the idea, oh, I should have brought these sources and gotten into this. This is the מקור makor of the idea that when we drink, we say לחיים l'chaim. Why do we say לחיים l'chaim? Often a person makes a לחיים l'chaim, you say it should be for a רפואה שלמה refuah shleimah for שמעון בערל Shimon Berel. It should be so that they can have children. It should be this one should have a שדך shidduch, לחיים l'chaim. Your drink and your drink and you're guzzling down that alcohol has an impact on the person somewhere else? So they say, yeah, you see from the משנה mishnah in סוטה sotah, that just like she drinks the מיים המאררים mayim ha-me’arerim in the מקדש Mikdash, wherever he is, he also suffers the consequence of her drinking. You see, there's a notion that one can drink and it impacts someone even far away. So you say לחיים l'chaim, you drink לחיים l'chaim, and that's why we say לחיים l'chaim. What we're saying is לחיים ולא למות l'chaim v'lo l'moves, it should be the opposite of the מיים המאררים mayim ha-me’arerim. The מיים המאררים mayim ha-me’arerim brought death, our drinking should be לחיים l'chaim. Our drinking should be for life. I want to give a whole שיעור shiur on how to make a לחיים l'chaim. The whole origins of the word לחיים l'chaim, how to make a לחיים l'chaim, do you say לחיים l'chaim and the ברכה bracha and then? Do you say the ברכה bracha and then make the לחיים l'chaim? Do you make the לחיים l'chaim and then the ברכה bracha? There's a lot to talk about another time on that on that subject. Okay, סוטה sotah. Then the, we're in the overview of the פרשה parsha. Then the פרשה parsha goes on and it gets into the next topic is the ברכת כהנים Birkat Kohanim, דוכנ'ן duchaning. I'm sorry, the next topic before דוכנ'ן duchaning is the נזיר Nazir. דבר אל בני ישראל ואמרת אליהם איש או אשה כי יפליא לנדור נדר נזיר להזיר להשם, מיין ושכר יזיר, חומץ יין וחומץ שכר לא ישתה Daber el Bnei Yisrael v'amarta aleihem ish o isha ki yafli lindor neder nazir l'hazir l'Hashem, mi'yayin v'shechar yazir, chometz yayin v'chometz shechar lo yishteh. The נזיר Nazir, the person who takes a Nazirite vow, who has to abstain from these practices, and who strives for a certain level of holiness. And our rabbi say, whoever sees סוטה בקלקולה יזיר עצמו מן היין sotah be'kilkulah yazir atzmo min hayayin. If you see what happens, a person who drinks too much and becomes intoxicated, ends up behaving inappropriately, ends up behaving immodestly, ends up problems like a סוטה sotah. So a person who sees a סוטה בקלקולה sotah be'kilkulah, if you witness, you read a headline about, you heard the story about somebody who went through a סוטה sotah story, you should take a vow not to drink wine. Make a סיג siyag, make a fence around yourself to protect yourself from engaging in such behavior. It's interesting in the משנה Mishnah and גמרא Gemara, we also have it, סמיכות פרשיות smichus parshios. נזיר Nazir and סוטה sotah are near each other also in the משנה Mishnah, but in the opposite order. Here in the Torah, first you have the story of סוטה sotah, then you have the story of נזיר Nazir. In the משנה Mishnah, first you have the נזיר Nazir, then you have the סוטה sotah. So the אמרי אמת Imrei Emes explains why. To teach us that you have to take precautions. Don't wait to hear about a סוטה sotah to become a נזיר Nazir. Become a נזיר Nazir before you ever hear about the סוטה sotah. The משנה Mishnah is the antidote to the order of the Torah, to tell us don't wait to hear about or learn about an indiscretion, be proactive in taking precautions in living a modest life to prevent slipping into behaviors which are inappropriate. But going back on the סמיכות פרשיות smichus parshios. So the question is raised here. What do you mean if you see a סוטה בקלקולה sotah be'kilkulah, יזיר עצמו מן היין yazir atzmo min hayayin? If you see what happens to a סוטה sotah, you think you have to take a נדר נזיר neder Nazir? You're going to be extraordinarily careful not to follow her footsteps. The גמרא Gemara describes very graphically her legs collapse, her stomachs explodes, she dies a horrific death, so does he, wherever he is. They die a horrific death. You think if you witness that, you're going to then be vulnerable to follow her footsteps and be a סוטה sotah? Isn't witnessing that alone enough to prevent you from following in that path? Why do you have to go to the extreme of יזיר עצמו מן היין yazir atzmo min hayayin? It's a great question. What do you think? The people are no help to me whatsoever. No help. It's all on me. Yes. The more that this happens, the more you see violence on TV, and you see people getting killed, you should think, “Gee, I'm never going to do that.” But statistics actually show the opposite. That the more you see it, the more vulnerable you are to follow. True. So the statistics show that about TV, the more exposed we are to violence, it doesn't necessarily... it desensitizes us about violence. That's true, but that's seeing it on TV. I don't know if that's the same thing as you heard about a friend, a neighbor, someone in the community who gave into the יצר הרע yetzer hara and now their whole life has fallen apart. Their reputation's fallen apart, their marriage is falling apart, their finances are falling apart. So the likely it is, you know about that, you're not going to follow, you'll be more protected because you've seen that and you don't want to have happen to you what happened to them. So what do you mean יזיר עצמו מן היין yazir atzmo min hayayin? It's a warning for you. It's a, okay, it's a warning for you, so all the more so. It was a warning for you, why do you have to go to the extreme of taking on this נדר neder, this נזירות neziros? Because people deny these things. They think they're above it. They think... Okay, so some people think that they're immune, they're above it, it won't happen to them. But there's a beautiful commentary I saw that says the reason that you're taking action is not because you're vulnerable to following her footsteps, but it's because now you know that that act is possible. You always thought, like, “Okay, the Torah says don't have an affair. Who has an affair? Who do I know who'd have an affair? We're a holy people, we're righteous people, we have a sacred institution of marriage.” And the moment we learn about, become exposed to somebody who's capable about doing that, it in itself leaves an impression on us. It changes our mindset. It brings it into the realm of possibility. It makes it something which is real and which is possible. And even if we don't become now more, more at risk of doing it, but just the fact that we've been exposed to it sort of contaminates and taints us. And therefore, to react to it and to offset it, we have to do something to increase our sense of holiness and sanctity. יזיר עצמו מן היין Yazir atzmo min hayayin. Who's the rabbi? I think people know, as you said, it doesn't matter where the gentleman is that got involved in this, and all of a sudden he dies this horrible death. They wouldn't understand why he died this horrible… Would they know why? Yeah, I think they would know why. I assume that they would know why. And the lady in the red, remembering about שמשון Shimshon. שמשון Shimshon, yeah. And I always remembered that story, though, that he was so strong and so everything, but because he was fooled by a woman, דלילה Delilah, and his whole life and then his dream died… Exactly. Exactly, that's the הפטרה haftarah. The next section, let's just wrap it up. The next section is, of course, the ברכת כהנים Birkat Kohanim. כה תברכו את בני ישראל אמור להם Koh te'varchu es Bnei Yisrael amor lahem. There's a lot to say about this, the three-fold ברכה bracha. The three-fold ברכה bracha. So I'll tell you a beautiful פשט pshat on the three-fold ברכה bracha. It says כה koh, thus shall you bless the Jewish people. We all just received that ברכה bracha yesterday, שבועות Shavuos. If you דאווענען daven at our Sfardi minyan, you can get the ברכה bracha every single day. כה תברכו את בני ישראל Koh te'varchu es Bnei Yisrael, thus. So the מדרש בראשית Midrash Bereishis says, מהיכן זכו ישראל לברכת כהנים me'heichan zachu Yisrael l'Birchas Kohanim? From where did we merit, from where did we deserve to get this ברכה bracha of ברכת כהנים Birchas Kohanim? So the מדרש Midrash says there's an allusion in the פסוק pasuk itself. It says כה תברכו koh te'varchu, thus shall you bless. Where else do we see that word כה koh? Remember back to בראשית Bereishis? The story of the עקידה Akeidah. ואני והנער נלכה עד כה V'ani v'hanaar neilcha ad koh. He tells אליעזר Eliezer and ישמעאל Yishmael, “You wait here, ואני והנער, יצחק ואני, נלכה עד כה v'ani v'hanaar, Yitzchak v'ani, neilcha ad koh, we're going to כה koh.” Where were they going? To כה תברכו את בני ישראל koh te'varchu es Bnei Yisrael. The ספר דעת סופר Sefer Daas Sofer says, you know, כה תברכו את בני ישראל koh te'varchu es Bnei Yisrael, you know what the greatest ברכה bracha a Jew could have is? כה תברכו את בני ישראל koh te'varchu es Bnei Yisrael. The greatest ברכה bracha is ואני והנער נלכה עד כה v'ani v'hanaar neilcha ad koh, when we walk together with our children on the same path. When we go on the path of Torah and מצוות mitzvos, when we get נחת nachas and joy, when we see what they're accomplishing and achieving, when we see who they are and who they've become, when they see that they've imbibed and they're living our messages and our values, כה תברכו את בני ישראל koh te'varchu es Bnei Yisrael. The greatest ברכה bracha בני ישראל Bnei Yisrael can have is כה koh, ואני והנער נלכה עד כה v'ani v'hanaar neilcha ad koh. The greatest ברכה bracha we can have is that our children and our grandchildren walk on the same path as us and give us tremendous and great נחת nachas. The last section of the פרשה parsha are the נשיאים nesi'im. What seems to be redundant, the 12 offerings that were brought, all exactly the same. And yes, yet the Torah takes up enormous real estate by repeating it over and over and over and over. This is the reading of חנוכה Chanukkah. The princes each brought exactly the same thing, but we introduce separately for each of them. Why the redundancy? I once heard a rabbi describe this פרשה parsha as a פרשה parsha only a בר מצוה bar mitzvah boy's mother could love. Because for everyone else, the whole two-thirds of the פרשה parsha is just repeating the same thing over and over and over and over and over again. Why are we taking up such precious real estate with the Torah? So the Slonimer Rebbe says, this is the Torah's source for, רחמנא ליבא בעי rachmana liba ba'i, that הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu wants our heart, he wants our כוונה kavanah, he wants our intentions. Two people can do the exact same act, but what we bring to the act is ourselves, our personality, our attitude, who we are, our intention, our כוונה kavanah. The Torah repeats it 12 times to say on the outside superficially, it looks like all 12 are the same. But because each one does it with their own intent, and each one brings their own personality, in fact, they're all very different. We can look at מצוות mitzvos and say, “What do I have to be the same as everyone else? Why do I have to be the same as myself? Yesterday I did the דאווענען davening, today I do the דאווענען davening, tomorrow I'll do the דאווענען davening. Every day, every time, every ראש השנה Rosh Hashanah, every שבועות Shavuos, every סוכות Sukkos, I'm doing the same external acts over and over and over again.” The answer is, רחמנא ליבא בעי rachmana liba ba'i, הקדוש ברוך הוא HaKadosh Baruch Hu doesn't want the external act, it's who we are and what we bring to it in our intention and internally. In that way, each one is very, very different. And so while it looks like we're reading the same thing, because each נשיא nasi was different, their קרבן karban was different as well.
