Transcript
Good morning, Boker Tov, welcome back to Parsha Perspectives for today. We have the privilege, the honor, the zechus to learn Parshas Vayigash. If you have a Chumash in front of you, it's on page 250. And as always, we begin with gratitude, thank you to our dear friends and sponsors of the series, Becky and Avi Katz and family in memory of David Grossman. Our learning should be l'iluy nishmas David ben Menachem Manush. Our learning is also dedicated in honor of a refuah shleimah for Rav Natanel ben Miri. May he should have a speedy, complete, painless refuah shleimah. Please God, all those who are ill should have a full recovery. If you'd like to sponsor any upcoming parsha shiur or any of the shiurim, BRSonline.org/sponsor. Page 250. Vayigash eilav Yehuda. Last week left off as a cliffhanger, and we all know the way it ends because we know the story. We've read it several times. But originally, as we saw last week from Rabbi Sacks before the printing press, when people waited literally almost a week to hear how the story ended, they were left in suspense. What would happen? Would there be a big reveal, Yosef and his brothers, demanding that Binyamin be left behind, the false accusation, the drama reaches its peak. And in this week's parsha, the drama, the drama continues. Vayigash eilav Yehuda. Yehuda approaches Yosef. ויאמר בי אדני ידבר נא עבדך דבר באזני אדני Can I speak? May I share something in the ears of my master? It's so tempting to not get past the first pasuk because there's so much to say on it. We've shared so much in the past, and I encourage you if you enjoy the parsha shiur each week, listen to the previous years too because those divrei Torah were also remarkable. The Ramak quoting the Rokeach, three steps forward, the three times vayigash is used. Maybe Yehuda's really speaking to himself. Vayigash eilav. Who's eilav? Yehuda approached him. We've developed, is he approaching God? Is he approaching Yosef? Maybe he's mustering the courage within himself, vayigash eilav. He's finding the courage from within. He speaks in the ears of his master. What a peculiar thing. You have an audience with the king, you have an audience with the prime minister, you have an audience with the president, and you say and his whisper in his ear? How close are you gonna get? A little, you like, fall back, step back, going and crouching into his space. ואל יחר אפך בעבדך כי כמוך כפרעה And how does he position? He says, you're like Pharaoh, you're so great. At this point in the relationship, in the conversation, in the negotiation, does he really still need to be telling Yosef how great he is? You're almost like Pharaoh. So much to talk about and unpack in the first pasuk, much of it we've discussed previously, some of it we'll get to now. So let's start out with a few insights from Rabbi Sacks, and you all have access to this now because we have a bookcase full of the new Koren Rabbi Sacks Chumash. Vayigash begins with a climactic scene in which Yosef finally reveals himself to his brothers, as we know. Now Rabbi Sacks quotes something you may not have heard others. What do porcupines do in the winter? Has anyone here ever considered that? I haven't, but apparently Schopenhauer has because Schopenhauer asked, and Rabbi Sacks echoes, what do porcupines do in the winter? Now what's the dilemma? If they come too close to one another, they injure one another. If they stay too far apart, they freeze. So what do porcupines do in the winter? Now you have a great topic of conversation for your Shabbos table. Life, they go to Florida. That's good. That's good. Porcupines. They have to be 55 though to go to Century Village, whatever. Life for porcupines is a delicate balance between closeness and distance. It's hard to get it right and dangerous to get it wrong. And says Rabbi Sacks, so it is for us. The force of the word that gives our parsha its name, vayigash, literally is, and he came close. Perhaps the first time in his life, Yehuda comes close to his brother Yosef. The irony is, of course, that he does not know it's Yosef. But that one act of coming close melts all of Yosef's reserve, all of his defenses, and he's of unable to stop himself, he finally discloses his identity. This moment contrasts with another many chapters and many years earlier. What was the pasuk that we read? When Yosef approaches his brothers in Shechem, sent by their father, we'll talk about in a moment, the brothers, they see, ooh, here he comes, here comes that dreamer. And the pasuk describes, he sees them, meirachok, they see him rather, they see him meirachok, in the distance. By the time he reaches them, they've already plotted. to kill him. At the beginning of the story when Yosef was sent by his father to see the brothers were doing, tending the sheep, they saw him meyrachok, from the distance. They couldn't see his face. All they could see was that robe. All they saw was how he was favored, how he was spoiled. All they saw was their difference, all they had was their animosity, all they could see was their anger. So upset them because it reminded them it was not they whom their father loved. From far away, we don't see people as human beings. When we stop seeing people as human beings, they become objects of envy or hate. Yosef and his brothers were too far apart in every way. Yosef and his brothers were too far apart, which is why only when Yehuda comes close, vayigash, the coldness between them thawed, they became brothers, not strangers. Distance damaged the relationship. Vayigash, Yehuda's act of drawing close, restored it. In that one word, Rabbi Sacks sees the solution, not only then, but I would argue now. Too many of us see our own brothers and sisters meyrachok. They're so far. They wear a different yamuka or no yamuka at all. They send their children to a different school. They vote, they observe, they practice, they dress differently. They're meyrachok. We see them as the other. Rabbi Sacks already developed, so beautifully said, we have to turn others into brothers. Turn the other into a brother, others into brothers. How do you do that? The same way Yehuda did, by closing the gap, vayigash. דבר נא באזני To break bread, to spend time, to connect. I mentioned last week that was our trip to the UAE. Those who were others, generalized, can become brothers if you learn, if you listen, if you believe, if you're willing to draw close. Not everyone, not even the majority necessarily, but if you're open. Vayigash, Yehuda didn't even know it was Yosef, but the very act, the initiation of vayigash, the willingness and the desire to draw close, became the solution and it's our solution. If we want to undo the sin of sinas chinam that really began this whole story, and now we continue to suffer from until today, then the answer and antidote is to go from meyrachok to vayigash, the willingness to draw close, to not act like porcupines, to not be afraid to be able to come close to one another. Yehuda's final confrontation, Rabbi Sacks continues, can only be fully understood in the context of his initial behavior towards Yosef. It is Yehuda in his first recorded words in the Torah who suggests selling Yosef into slavery. Yehuda said to his brothers, what do we gain by killing him, by covering his blood? Let's sell him to the Yishmael. We won't harm him with our own hands. After all, he's our brother, our own flesh and blood. And the brothers agreed. As I state in Bereishis Lamed Zayin. This is a speech of monstrous callousness. There is no mention of the evil of murder, merely a pragmatic calculation. At the very moment he calls Yosef our own flesh and blood, Yehuda is actually proposing to sell him as a slave. At this point, Yehuda is the last person from whom we'd expect great ideas. And yet, however, Yehuda, more than anyone else in the Torah, changes. The man we see confronting Yosef all these years later is not the same personality as the one who spoke when Yosef was trapped in the pit. Then he was prepared to see his brother sold into slavery, now he's prepared to suffer that fate himself, rather than see Binyamin held as a slave. And it's exactly this, I'm pausing from Rabbi Sacks, it's exactly this that makes Yosef lo yachol l'hisapek. He's unable to hold back. In fact, his farm bring down, brings down, why does it say lo yachol, he couldn't, he wasn't able? Why should he have? In fact, you could ask the opposite. Not only why Yosef's unable to restrain himself any further. Okay. Why is he restraining himself until now? Why didn't he, the moment they walked in, say, brothers, how are you? No, b'lashon hakodesh, he could have spoken to them in Hebrew. Here's my bris, ani Yosef. Why wasn't there a reveal at the very beginning? Why was he restraining, why was he holding back, why was he disguising himself until now? The answer is he's trying to make the dreams fully come true. He's trying to see them unfold. He's trying to make his dreams become fully a reality. But v'lo yachol, in this moment, he can't hold back. Had he been able to hold back, had he been able to see it through, this ruse that would have been the fulfillment of the dreams, there never would have been a churban in the future. Klal Yisrael, Am Yisrael would have had a different history and a different destiny. The sinas chinam continues because Yosef revealed almost too soon. Why? Cause lo yachol, he was unable to hold back. Why couldn't he hold back anymore? Because what did he see now that was the indication to him that the ultimate teshuva gemura? The Rambam writes, teshuva is to become a better person. Don't repeat the same behavior, avoid the people, the places, avoid the conditions, the environment that led to those poor choices to begin with. Then the Rambam writes, what's teshuva gemura, complete and absolute teshuva, is to be back in the same circumstance, same place, same temptation, same desire, the same vitality to violate it, and yet, this time you say no. That's teshuva gemura. It's a famous question on the Rambam, not for now, we'll save it for Elul, that if you undergo teshuva properly, you never get to teshuva gemura. Teshuva is avoid the place, the people, the circumstance, the environment. Teshuva gemura is you're in exactly where you were. And yet, this time, a different outcome. So if you do teshuva properly, you never get to teshuva gemura, question for another time. But Yosef sees his brothers, Yehuda in particular, and there is a moment of teshuva gemura. And what makes it teshuva gemura? How did Yosef choreograph and curate and orchestrate things that this was teshuva gemura? Yosef only has one brother from the same mother, namely, Binyamin. He puts Binyamin in the pit, so to say, and now he's waiting to see, will the brothers walk away, will they abandon, as they did to him, or will they rise up, will they advocate, will they speak up, will they stand for their brother? And when Yehuda gives this little speech, this little monologue, Vayigash elav Yehuda, when this time Yehuda is ready to go to battle for a brother, he refuses to walk away empty-handed. Now there's teshuva gemura. Yosef sees, this isn't the same brother Yehuda who when they were ready to kill him said, nah, why should we kill him, no blood on our hands, why should we live with that guilt? Let's throw him in the pit, let's sell him to the Yishmaelim. When he hears a very different speech from what seems to be the same person, he knows this is an altogether different brother. Teshuva gemura has taken place. This is a highlight by Rabbi Sacks. A highly significant moment in the history of the human spirit. Yehuda is the first penitent, the first ba'al teshuva in the Torah. Yosef is consistently known as HaTzaddik, the righteous. He also becomes mishneh l'melech, second to the king. Yehuda becomes the father of monarchy. לא יסור שבט מיהודה. Yehuda, all of monarchy descends from Yehuda. Except for Chanukah, the Chashmonaim, no bitterness. Some suggest that's why Rebbi Yehuda HaNasi, there is no masechet Chanukah. We have Rosh Hashanah, Sukkah, Yoma, we have other psachim, why is it Megillah? Why is there no maseches Chanukah? So Ta'amei haMinhagim says because Rebbi Yehuda HaNasi descends from Yehuda and he is bitter that the Chashmonaim usurped the throne and they shouldn't have, and the punishment was no masechta for you. That can't be the case, again we've discussed this in the past too. So Yehuda though is the father of monarchy, לא יסור שבט מיהודה. Where the penitent Yehuda stands, even the perfectly righteous Yosef cannot stand. Chazal tell us, במקום שבעלי תשובה עומדים אין צדיקים גמורים יכולים לעמוד. The person who is righteous, never fell, never failed, can't compare to the individual who fell down seven times and got up. To the ba'al teshuva who transformed his or her life. So Yehuda who has to reinvent himself in this way is greater. Yosef doesn't hold a candle, because true, Yosef is HaTzaddik. He overcame several tests, but nevertheless, he never fell. However great an individual may be in the virtue of his or her own character, greater still is the one capable of growth and change. That is the power of penitence, and it begins with Yehuda. So really the beginning of this parsha is a story of transformation. We think we're reading a story of Yosef. Yosef was the one who was abandoned, sold into slavery, languished in prison twelve years. Yosef rises to greatness. Yosef is this ruse, he's holding back. Yosef, the big reveal. And yes, it's a story of Yosef, but it's as much a story of Yehuda who undergoes this extraordinary personal transformation, who fulfills at the highest level teshuva gemura. Yehuda who gives in us that capacity for the courage of our conviction, to not walk away, to confront an enemy, to stand up with pride, to stand up with strength and with faith. Vayigash elav Yehuda. That's that Raman or Rokeach, the three steps forward. Forward we take before our Amida is to walk up to Hashem, vayigash, to approach and to say, I care about the people around me. I'm davening for a fellow Jew. I'm davening for those who are underprivileged or those who need help. I'm standing up and I'm standing in, and here I am. And then the parsha unfolds. Again, I'm tempted there's so much to say, but we're really going to back down, we're going to do the second half of the parsha today. So, Yehuda approaches, he steps forward, he recounts the whole story, which Yosef frankly doesn't need, he was there, he lived it. This is what happened and he falls said he came and we went to our father when we came back, and yeah, I, I was there. I'm the other person in the story. But nevertheless, Yehuda recounts it. Some say this is part of the strategy. If you want to evoke compassion, kindness, rachamim, then you tell the story first person, you bring out and you try to elicit a sense of compassion from the other. And in the story, what happens? Let's go to pasuk kaf ches. ויאמר עבדך אבי אלינו אתם ידעתם כי שנים ילדה לי אשתי, you know that my wife gave birth to two, that wife, Rochel. ויצא האחד מאתי ואמר אך טרף טרף ולא ראיתיו עד הנה. And this is what our father told us, says Yehuda, one is gone. He must have been torn to pieces, I've not seen him since. Yehuda's quoting Yaakov. Yaakov is repeating what the brothers told him, which is that that older son from that wife, Yosef, was torn to pieces. Writes Rabbi Sacks. One of the great questions we naturally ask each time we read the story of Yosef, why does he not at some point during their 22-year separation send word to his father he's alive? Yosef's the viceroy of Egypt. He could send a messenger, carrier pigeon. Why doesn't Yosef get in touch with his father? 22-year absence, separation. Get word to Yaakov. Dad, I'm alive. I'm here. Come down, I'll come to you. Yosef knows how much his father loves him. He must know how much their separation grieves him. He does not know what Yaakov thinks has happened, but he knows it's his duty to communicate when the opportunity arises to tell his father he's alive and well. So why then does he not? Why did he wait till now? Says Rabbi Sacks, we've quoted this previous years from others. Story of Yosef's descend to slavery and exile begins when his father sent him alone to see how his brothers were fairing. Here, Yosef is languishing all those 22 years, replaying the episode in his head over and over again. How did it happen? How did it unfold? How and why does Yosef find himself in Shechem, alone and secluded with his brothers in the middle of nowhere to begin with? Because Yaakov, his father said, hey, Yosef, go check on your brothers, go see how they're doing. It was there at that meeting far from home they plotted to kill him, lower him into a pit, and eventually sold him. What else could he conclude as he reflected on the events that led up to his slave other than that Yaakov had deliberately placed him in danger? Why? Because of the event immediately prior of it. When Yosef had told his father the sun of the moon, that his father and mother would bow down, how did Yaakov react? His father rebuked him. It was outrageous to suggest that his parents would bow down. It was wrong to imagine, all the more so to say it. Yosef did not communicate with his father because he believed his father no longer wanted to see him or hear from him. His father had terminated the relationship. And that was a reasonable inference, the facts as Yosef knew them. He could not have known Yaakov still loved him, that his brothers deceived their father, and that his father mourned and he refused to be comforted. We know these facts because the Torah tells us, but if you live through the eyes of Yosef far away in another land serving as a slave, how could he know? Places the story in a completely new and tragic light. Yosef's first thought when truth is revealed is not about Yehuda or Binyamin, right? When the truth is revealed, his first thought is about Yaakov. A doubt he had harbored for 22 years has been shown to be unfounded. So what's his first question? Ha'od Avi chai. Is my father still alive? Which is a very peculiar question. Because what did Yehuda just tell him? You're going to kill our father. If you don't send Binyamin back, our father surely will die. Yosef says, oh, I am Yosef, is dad still alive? You just told you dad's still alive, and this whole argument was if you don't send Binyamin back, dad's going to die. So why is your first question, is dad still alive? And the answer is that wasn't the first question. Yosef didn't ask, I don't know if he called them Tati, Abba, daddy, dad, his first question was not is dad still alive. What was his first question? Ha'od Avi chai. My father. Yeah, I garnered through the story that dad's alive, but is he still my father? father? Has he asked about me? Does he miss me? Does he care about me? Was he behind this whole thing? That's all I want to, I forgive you. We're all good. God orchestrated it. I was meant to be, as we've shared in the past, Yosef understood psychology before anyone else, and he reframes. He reframes his whole story. In DBT therapy, it talks about reframing. The same picture, but if you put a new frame around it, you can have sometimes a tired, worn out picture. But when you put a new frame around it, comes to life. It's pretty, it's beautiful. Now you want to hang it on your wall. We can have a picture that's tired, it's worn, but when we put a frame around it, it's beautiful. Yosef reframes his picture. The picture was, sold into slavery, falsely accused, languishing in prison, rises to viceroy. That was the picture, not so pretty. But now he puts a new frame. He reframes his whole life. This wasn't you. Asher m'chartem, Asher m'chartem, as lashon Yasher Koach, Asher shibartem, we spoke about previously. This wasn't you he tells the brothers. This was Hashem. He orchestrated, he wanted this. This is where I was meant to be. Yosef is the first to embrace his place and recognize he wasn't stuck in Mitzrayim, that's where he was meant to be. He reframes. So he has no questions about everything. He doesn't say to the brothers, how could you? Where were you? What were you thinking? What have you done the last 22 years? He doesn't have any questions for the brothers. The only question he has is, ha'od avi chai. Abba, daddy. Does he miss me? Was he behind this? Does he long to see me? Is my father still alive? Is he still alive? When it comes to the brothers, he's ready to move on. Rabbi Sacks continues, this is our last Rabbi Sacks of the day. This is the first recorded moment in the history in which one human being forgives another. So already in the first few psukim of our parsha, we have the first act of tshuva of courage and boldness, of standing up for a brother, and the first forgiveness. First time God forgives is the chet ha'egel. Hashem does not forgive Adam v'Chava or Kayin, he simply mitigates their punishment. But mitigation is not outright forgiveness. Hashem does not forgive the generation of the flood, or the builders of Bavel, or the sinners of Sdom. Hashem in short does not forgive human beings until human beings learn to forgive one another. All through Sefer Breishis, Hashem does not yet forgive. He mitigates, he pardons, he offers clemency, but he doesn't forgive. Only when is he willing to forgive? What is the catalyst for Hashem's forgiveness? When we learn to forgive one another. It takes Yosef to bring forgiveness into the world. Had Hashem forgiven first, he would have made the human situation worse not better. People would have said, why shouldn't I harm others? After all Hashem forgives. It's what Hashem is waiting for. Forgiveness transformed the human situation. For the first time it established the possibility that we're not condemned endlessly to repeat the past. Genuine forgiveness only exists in a culture in which repentance exists. When I repent I show I can change, the future is not predestined. I can make it different from what it might have been. And when I forgive, I show that action is not mere reaction, as revenge would be. Forgiveness breaks the irreversibility of the past. Possibility of the kind of moral transformation simply did not exist in ancient Greece or any other pagan culture. To put it technically, Greece was a shame and honor culture, Judaism was a guilt repentance and forgiveness culture, the first of its kind in the world. Humanity changes the day Yosef forgives his brothers. When we forgive and are worthy of being forgiven, we are no longer prisoners of our past. And once we demonstrate it, then Hashem is willing to practice it as well. Incredible and brilliant insights, so many lessons to learn just from the beginning of our parsha. So Yosef reveals himself, אוי לי מיום הדין אוי לי מיום התוכחה. All of their past, the last 22 years, the picture's become clear. What happened, why, when, who, where, what? And now the brothers are confronted by the reality of what they've done. אוי לי מיום הדין אוי לי מיום התוכחה. That's what it's gonna be like for each and every one of us. When we watch the movie of our lives, when we have to see and undeniably confront what we've done, it's a painful, difficult reality. Yosef reveals and he reframes. He actually comforts and strengthens his brothers. Don't worry, not taking revenge, we're good to go. It wasn't you. It was Hashem who put me here and placed me here and it was for a and it was for a reason. Extraordinary. Extraordinary capacity that he has. Last night Baruch Kupershtein spoke and we sang and we danced and we thanked Hashem his return and all the living hostages. If you missed it last night, you missed one of the historic evenings in Boca Raton synagogue. It was amazing. And here he was 738 days in prison, also alone, far from abandoned from his family or his people, but alone. And yet, he understood, he found faith, he found Hashem there, he talked all about it. His longing, all he wanted was to put on tfillin, and his mother somehow sensing that, took his tfillin at home and asked so many people to put it on since he couldn't. He talked about, he talked about saying Shma, talked about prayer, he talked about Shabbos. And I asked him, the only reason he ended up there is because he had gone back and forth 10 times to Nova to save and to rescue, which he did, many, many people, and only because he went back, he was taken captive. Did he regret it? Did he regret it? Looking back and sitting there those 738 days, did he wish he hadn't gone back? He said he wouldn't change a thing. He was where essentially he was meant to be, because he saved so many people and having lived through that time there. Extraordinary people. You don't have to only open the Chumash and read about thousands of years ago. There are modern-day Maccabees and modern-day heroes of our people, truly, truly extraordinary. So Yosef reveals himself and now he sends a message back to his father. Perek Mem Hey, Pasuk Chaf Gimmel. He identifies himself and he comforts his brothers. And now he's ready. Now that after 22 years, desperate to see his father and to be seen by his father, which we'll speak about. So Perek Mem Hey, Pasuk Chaf Gimmel, page 254, bottom sends. He's sending them back, ויעשו כן בני ישראל ויתן להם יוסף עגלות על פי פרעה and he wants to send specifically in wagons. Tzeida l'derech, he gives them a shtickel nash for the road. Jews always have to take some food. What if you get stuck? What if you're abandoned? What if you're sitting on the tarmac? What if the flight is delayed? Jews always have enough for a week. לכולם נתן לאיש חליפות שמלות ולבנימין נתן שלש מאות כסף וחמש חליפות שמלות To each of his brothers he gave a change of clothing, to Binyamin he gave 300 pieces of silver and five changes of clothing. We've discussed in the past, isn't Yosef just repeating the behavior of his father, which started it all? The whole thing began because Yaakov spoiled Yosef. And what is Yosef doing right now? His brother Binyamin, the only brother from the same mother, he's spoiling, he's treating differently, he's giving more to. Doesn't he understand? Didn't he see himself as a victim of exactly that? ולאביו שלח כזאת עשרה חמורים נושאים מטוב מצרים turn the page, ולאביו שלח כזאת He sent his father 10 donkeys with the best Egyptian, 10 donkeys with grain, bread and food for his father for the journey. To his father he said, here's some Egyptian clothing, Egyptian cotton sheets, here's some incredible food, grain, bread, food for his father for the journey. And here we quote Rabbi Weinfeld, since Timely and Timeless came out we haven't quoted Rabbi Weinfeld, everybody could read it on their own. I don't know if this one appears in there. But says Rabbi Weinfeld, mituv Mitzrayim, Yosef sends his father from the best of Egypt. Rashi quotes the Medrash Agada, מצאנו בתלמוד ששלח לו יין שדעת זקנים נוחה הימנו He sent his father a bottle of fine wine, aged wine. Why? Daas zkeinim nocha heimenu. The older you get, just like fine wine aged to perfection. That was the other name. We called it the Empty Nesters in the end. The other name way back when when we first branded that auxiliary of the shul instead of Empty Nesters, we were considering aged to perfection. We didn't go with that. But older, the older you get, the more you appreciate those things which improve with time and age. So Yosef sends his father an aged bottle of wine. מדרש אגדה גריסין של פול and he sent him also grisin shel pul. He sent him this grain. Now, what's the significance of these two things? You think about the life of Yosef, it's really incredible. Incredible how he was able to become who he became after such a series of tragic events. First, anyone know how old Yosef was when his mother died? His mother dropped dead on the road, buried on the side of the road. How old was Yosef? He was eight years old, as it says in Seder Olam. Then, hated, marginalized by his brothers. Even his father seemingly betrays him, sending him off to his brothers. Then his brothers want to kill him. Instead, they settle on selling him into slavery. And there, he rises in his master's home only to be falsely accused, languishes in prison for how long? 12 years. Two extra years, 12 years. But even there, after having been victimized and suffering a troubled youth, does Yosef see himself as a victim? Does Yosef, those 12 years in prison say, woe is me, why me, where is God? No. He's sitting in prison. He sees the sar hamashkim and the sar ha'ofim and they're down and out, they're depressed and despondent. What does Yosef do? Does he say, stay to your corners, your problem, I got my own problems, look at my life, woe is me, I have no one? He says, מדוע פניכם רעים היום. Hey brothers, why do you look so sad? Smile. Don't worry, be happy. Why do you look so sad? Why do we look so sad? Well, we had these dreams, they're haunting. He says, no problem, I'll interpret them for you. One of you some bad news, the other good news. And when you get out, don't forget to remember me. Don't forget to remember me. Maduah pneichem. Yosef, after all he had gone through, lost his mother as eight, attempted to kill him, sell him into slavery, falsely accused, 12 years in prison, abandoned by the world, seemingly by the Almighty himself, instead of being a victim, instead of living as a martyr, instead of complaining, Yosef sees the pain of others and wants to help. Even more so, the Gemara in Sotah tells us that when Pharaoh met Yosef, he says, גינוני מלכות אני רואה בו. I see aristocracy in Yosef. How did Yosef maintain a demeanor of aristocracy after all that he had went through? How? How did Yosef persevere? How did Yosef come out? How did he do it? I'm not comparing them, but Bar Cooperstein last night, he was a young man, a boy, when his father answering a hatzalah call in Israel on his motorcycle got in a car accident, was paralyzed, and he had to leave school to man his father's falafel store. He's so responsible, takes responsibility for providing for his parents, for his family. And then he sits 738 days in tunnels, captivity. And he comes last night and he's singing, od yihyeh tov, od yihyeh tov, smile. And the highlight of the night for me was when he led all of us in the perek of Tehillim mizmor l'sodah. To give gratitude to Hashem, gratitude to Hashem. If there's anyone who has a right to feel, where were you, how could you? How did Yosef maintain this demeanor? There were two ideas that Yosef always had in mind that allowed him to overcome everything and become who he became, says Rabbi Weinfeld. The first message is grisin shel pul. What's grisin shel pul? The Maharal in his Gur Aryeh on our parsha comments, ויחש יעקב ירידה מן הגלות לרדת שם היה יודע יעקב הגלות שעתיד להיות לישראל במצרים. Yakov was worried to go down to Egypt because he knew the Jewish people were destined to suffer exile in Egypt. And therefore, שלח יוסף לראות כי הגלות הוא טוב כי יהיו ישראל עם נכבד ורם מכל החשובים בגלות והם משועבדים מצרים בפרך. It's a long Maharal. But the Maharal essentially says, and then he, let me skip to the end, היו דומים לגריסין ברחיים, שכל זמן שאדם כותש או שם ברחיים, אינם נשברים לחלקים רבים, ומאחד נעשה שישה. לפיכך שלח לו גריסין של פול. The message that Yosef imbibed, which he was given over to Yaakov, was the idea that from great difficulty and challenge is where growth takes place. Just like these grisin, this grain, when they're crushed and multiply and grow, so too the Jewish people, when you try to crush us, when you try to break us, you just make us multiply and grow. There's an old expression, it's not a Jewish one. They tried to bury us, they planted us instead. They tried to bury us, but they planted us instead. This message Yosef carried with him, when things get difficult, that is where the main growth happens. What about the aged wine? It would seem it can be wine from Mitzrayim and made by Egyptians. Can't be, because that would be yayin nesech or at least stam yeinam, not kosher. So, Rav Weinfeld suggests, it must have been wine that Yosef himself made, but had aged. Rashi says in Mikeitz on the pasuk that they drank, שמיום שמכרוהו לא שתו יין והוא לא שתה יין, that the truth is, from the day Yosef was sold, neither he nor the brothers drank. So why would Yosef have stored wine away? It must be they live with the message that one day it'll all be over and they'll be able to celebrate. Here you have Yosef makes wine. He rises to be the viceroy of Egypt and he makes wine. Why? He's not drinking it. He refuses to drink until he's reunited, until it's all over. That aged wine was an expression of his faith. It's like Miriam, we'll read in a few weeks when they come out of Egypt and the men are singing *az yashir*, Miriam leads the women with their instruments in their own song and the instruments. Where in the world did you get instruments? Moment ago you're slaves in Egypt, miraculously liberated and now you're playing your instruments? The band's back together again? Where'd you get instruments? Because the optimism, the faith of women in particular, so the whole time they're in *Mitzrayim* and leaving it is, it's worth holding on to these instruments because we will dance again. We will dance again. We danced again last night. We will dance again. Miriam and the women knew we will dance again. Yosef knew we will drink *l'chaim* again. So he brought the aged wine. These were the two messages, one being that difficult times are what is necessary to facilitate growth and ability to believe and know one day it will be over. And those were the two foods that Yosef sent his father because he was communicating to his father and to all of us what it takes and what we need to be resilient, to have courage, to recognize whatever hardship we're going through, it may be trying to bury us or break us, it's only planting us, it's only multiplying us, it's only elevating us, and that it's worth holding on to that bottle of wine or to have those instruments because we will dance again and because we will sing again. פרק מ״ה פסוק כ״ח. So they go to Yaakov, they reveal carefully, *Hatzalah*'s on call, they're ready as they reveal, after 22 years, guess what? Yosef is still alive. And they show him, they tell him the whole story, וידברו אליו את כל דברי יוסף אשר דבר אלהם, they repeat everything Yosef had said. וירא את העגלות אשר שלח יוסף לשאת אתו. And he sees the wagons that Yosef had sent. ותחי רוח יעקב אביהם. And when he sees the wagons that Yosef had sent, comes back to life. Finally, after 22 years, he can exhale, finally, he breathes again. *Vayomer Yisrael*, and how does he react? This Yaakov is back to being Yisrael. Yisrael is the higher name, the name of destiny, the name of purpose. Yaakov now becomes Yisrael. Now that he's brought back to life and he knows the continuity, the destiny, the story continues through Yosef, that Yosef is still alive. ויאמר ישראל רב עוד יוסף בני חי אלכה ואראנו בטרם אמות. How great! My son Yosef still lives. I'm gonna go and see him before I die. What word in that *pasuk* is extra? רב אברהם שאר שליט\"א in his new *Nezer HaParsha*. עמדו המפרשים שתיבת עוד מיותרת לשון. The word *od* is extra. He could have and should have just said, *Yosef b'ni chai*. *Yosef*, my son, is alive. What is *od*? הוה ליה לכתוב רב יוסף בני חי. וכן השבטים אמרו ליעקב. The *Shvatim* themselves, when the brothers report, they too use that language that seems extra and unnecessary, *od Yosef chai*. There's something special here about the word *od*. Why is the word *od* being used? The *Heilige Sfas Emes* turns to a *pasuk* earlier in *Vayishlach*. וירא אלקים אל יעקב עוד. שמך יעקב לא יקרא שמך עוד כי אם ישראל יהיה שמך. השם שניתן לו מעצמו השם הקדוש שמו עליו ולא יעקב לא זה שתיקן שמו זכה עוד. He develops this idea. The *midah* of Yosef that he gets from Yaakov is the *midah* of *od*. What's the *midah* of *od*? We spoke about this past week in the *N'shei* Women's *Kiddushin Shiur*. The *midah* of *od* is the *midah* of Chanukah, *mosif v'holech*. To not say I'm done, I'm finished, I'm fixed. What you see is what you get. To never become apathetic or complacent, but no matter what age, no matter what stage of life, *od*. There's more to do, more to grow, more to become, more to contribute, to live a life of *od*. We're never done, we're never finished, we're never fixed, *od*. To live a life, the *midah* of *od*. That's Yosef's *midah*. That's why Chanukah, *chosheiv u'blin*, Chanukah corresponds with Yosef, and Yosef is very name, יוסף ה' לי בן אחר, Yosef's very name is Yosef, Tosefes, more, additional, progress, adding on, not done, not finished, not fixed. Ode, to live ode. That's Yosef. When Yaakov sees is that not only is Yosef physically alive, not only was he spared and physically he's back, but Yosef is back and he's better than ever. Yosef is back, and he's back, and he still has the mida of ode intact. He still has that quality of more, better, greater, additional, ode, ode, ode. He still has it going on. He doesn't quote it of sure, but the holy Maria Yechazkel says in Tehillim, אזמרה לאלקי בעודי, we sing and dance to Hashem how? B'odei, with our ode. When we live life b'odei, when we have a little extra ode, when we live life with a sense of ode, more, additional, extra, I'm not done. I'm not finished. I'm not fixed. Ode. Azamra L'elokai, we sing and we praise Hashem how? By living a life of Odei, of ode, by always doing more. Okay. Perek Mem Vav, pasuk kaf ches. Page 260. They come down, Yaakov makes his way down to Mitzrayim. And the Torah recounts who he brings with him, the family, the hidden miracle of Yocheved's birth. Perek Mem Vav, pasuk kaf ches, page 260, chapter 46, verse 28. ואת יהודה שלח לפניו אל יוסף להורות לפניו גשנה ויבאו ארצה גשן. Now, Yaakov sends Yehuda ahead of him. Why? Says to Yehuda, don't shlep along with us, you go quickly. Get there before us. Why? To prepare ahead of him in Goshen. And they arrive in the region of Goshen. Why does he send them ahead to Goshen and what is he meant to prepare? So says the Midrash, להכין לו בית ועד שיהיו מורים בו דברי תורה שהשבטים לומדים בו. You get there ahead of us because you need to identify a location. What location does Yehuda need to find and identify, rent or buy, prepare for the arrival of Yaakov and the rest of the family? You need to find a Yeshiva, Beis Medrash, beis vaad for divrei Torah. תדע לך שכך הוא, שכיוון ששלח ליוסף לא היה יודע באיזה פרק פירש ממנו שהיה משנה משנתו. כיוון שבאו אחיו של יוסף אצלו ואמרו לו עוד יוסף חי ותפג לבו, נזכר באיזה פרק פירש ממנו. אמר בלבו, יודע אני שבפרק עגלה ערופה. אמר להם, אם אתם יודעים באיזה פרק פירש ממני, אני מאמין לכם. What happens? What caused Yaakov to send Yehuda in advance, go identify, go find, go secure a location, a beis medrash? What was it? It was the wagons. What was it about the wagons? Yosef was embedding a message to his father in the wagons. He was signaling, Tatti, Abba, Dad, I'm still holding by what we were learning last. 22 years. I'm embarrassed to admit, I'm not sure I remember what I learned in the daf earlier this morning. Yosef is telling his father, I remember what we learned 22 years ago. We're in the middle of the sugya of eglah arufah. When a person, a body is found and we don't know which city, we don't know who murdered, and we measure which is the closest city, we snap the neck of the eglah, the calf. Eglah arufah. How would he signal to his father, I'm holding by what we were learning? I'm still areingetan in learning, I'm still holding in the learning, I'm still thinking about the learning. Doesn't matter I've risen to be the viceroy of Egypt, I'm running the economy of Egypt, and the second most powerful man in the world. But I'm still holding in what we were last learning. How is he going to tell his father? Eglah arufah, agalah, agalos, he sends him wagons. And when Yaakov, when Yaakov sees the wagons, he says, ah, my son Yosef is still alive. And he's alive not only physically but spiritually, we need a beis medrash to build around him. Yehuda, go, go ahead. We're a family, we're in real estate, of course. Go find the location. Go find the beis medrash. Says Rav Chaim Friedlander, great mashgiach of the Menahala of Ponevezh, quoting from the Ponevezher Rav, לכאורה יש להבין מדוע באמת יעקב שכח באיזה פרק עסק עם יוסף עשרים ושתים שנה. Because the medrash says, not only does Yosef remember where he was holding in the learning, so did the brothers. But how did Yaakov deduce that from getting the wagons? Says the Ponevezh Rav, היה ברור ליעקב אבינו שמאחר וזה בן יוסף ודאי עדיין דבוק בתלמודו כפי שהיה עד כדי שנפרדו כשהיו באמצע סוגיא של עגלה ערופה. Yaakov was confident that even if he was separated from Yosef, he'd still be holding in the sugya. Adayin hu ochez. But, וכשנגלה עליהם בוודאי שאלם אם הם יודעים מה התחדש בבית מדרשו של אבא בסוגיא. Yaakov knew, how would he know if Yosef is still holding? Because Yosef, when he would reveal himself after 22 years, would say, hey guys, it's me. Ani Yosef, ha'od avi chai? Nu? What was the teretz to the kasha on the shiur klali 22 years ago? Guys, you threw me in the pit, you sold me into slavery, I never found out the end of what Abba said in the sugya of egla arufa. We were all learning egla arufa together with Dad, and you decided to throw me out of the beis medrash. You threw me out of the shiur. I didn't get to hear how it ends. I never got the teretz to the kasha. Nu? Tell me the end of the shiur from 22 years ago. אף שעברו כ\"ה שנים מאז שעזב את בית אביו, אם לא שאלם כנראה אינו בנו. And when Yaakov asked, had Yosef not asked the brothers, Nu? how did the shiur end? Nu? What was the answer to the question? Then Yosef would not, it wasn't Yosef. His Yosef, Yaakov knew, his Yosef would still not only be holding in what they were learning, would be asking, Nu how did the shiur end? גם ליוסף היה דבר ברור שאביו ישאל על זה. And Yosef knew his father would ask, Nu? did he want to know what I answered? V'lachen shalach es ha'agalos, that's why he sent the wagons. When Yaakov saw that not only Yosef remembered where they were learning but that he asked the brothers what was the answer to the question, od Yosef chai, now he knew, now he knew that Yosef was spiritually still alive. The Tiferes Shmuel also has a comment here. Says the Tiferes Shmuel: למה בחר יעקב דוקא ביהודה? He's coming a different angle. Yaakov sends Yehuda in advance to go identify the location. Why Yehuda? Why not Yehuda? Of all the brothers, which tribe do we associate with Torah, Talmud Torah? Yissachar. Zevulun. The Yissachar-Zevulun relationship, partnership. So maybe, maybe Levi. Levi, יורו משפטיך ליעקב ותורתך לישראל. Levi, Kohanim, tribe of Levi and the Kohanim are the teachers of Torah. Yissachar is the one who sits in the tent of Torah. So it should be either Levi or Yissachar. Yehuda is malchus. Why does he send malchus? Why malchus? It's a very important, powerful lesson, says Rav Shlomo Barenbaum. ארץ מצרים מקום רשע ועבודה זרה. Egypt is a decadent, morally corrupt, wicked idolatrous place. ויושביה היו שטופי זימה. And those who dwell there are morally perverted. Paroh too, made himself into a god. So Yaakov understood he had to send דוקא יהודה שהיה בעל עוז וגבורה ויש לו כח של מלכות. For the Jew to not only survive, but to thrive in exile, says Rav Shlomo Barenbaum, you have to not just be like Levi and Yissachar, know how to sit and learn, but you have to be like Yehuda. Regal and royal. Malchus. Don't recoil, don't hide, don't be afraid. Stand proud. ולכן רק הוא יכול בכח של גבורת ארי לשבור כנגד המפריעים. We need to invoke and we need to express the midah of Yehuda inside us. The answer as we're facing this wave of antisemitism is not to hide and is not to be afraid, but to stand taller, prouder, and to practice more strongly, and to carry ourselves with royalty, to be regal, to be malchus. To be malchus. Therefore Rashi writes, לתקן לו בית תלמוד שמשם תצא הוראה. Doesn't say that Yehuda's job is to be the Rosh Yeshiva. That's Levi, that's Yissachar. They'll be the Rosh Yeshiva and the Rosh Kollel. Levi and Yissachar. What's Yehuda's job? l'saken lo beis talmud. Stand up for the institution, build that institution, demand the respect and the honor of the institution, the safety of the institution. The midah we need in golus is the midah of Yehuda. As high as we were last night in welcoming Bar, I got a postcard in the mail yesterday here at shul from some anti-Semite that depicted the IDF soldiers as accomplices of Nazis, and Gaza we've turned into Auschwitz. It's a picture of America and Israel with blood dripping all over Palestine. And guess what their name is. Correct. They're cowards, they didn't sign it. They're cowards, they didn't sign it. So if this anonymous, cowardly postcard with a stamp from Canada thinks it's going to make me afraid, or that our shul is going to hesitate to stand with Israel and the heroes of the IDF, of our programs online and offline, they couldn't be more mistaken. Because we descend from all of us Yehuda. We have malchus. We're not afraid. We're proud. We're practicing. Hashem is on our side and Hashem has a plan. And they don't cause us to hesitate not for one second. We are like the mida, we have the mida of Yehuda inside us, and that's what the moment calls for. That's why Yaakov, he doesn't send Levi, and he doesn't send Yissachar. They'll become the Rosh Yeshiva and the Rosh Kollel once you get there. But the mida of Yehuda, of malchus, that's what the moment demands. Perek Mem-Vav, pasuk chaf-tes. What happens? ויאסור יוסף מרכבתו ויעל לקראת ישראל אביו גשנה. Yosef harnesses his chariot, went up to meet Yisrael his father in Goshen. And now he appears before, vayera eilav, he appears before him, vayipol al tzavarav, he falls on his neck, ויבך על צואריו עוד. And he wept on his neck excessively. Again by the way, we don't know who's he, who's he, who's they, who lot of pronouns are being used, you can read it different ways. ויאמר ישראל אל יוסף אמותה הפעם. Now I can die once אחרי ראותי את פניך כי עודך חי. I see you're still alive. I see you're still alive. What's going on here? Oh, there's so many things to say. Let's start with Rav Yerucham. Rashi tells us that Yaakov collapses on the neck of Yosef and what does he do? He kisses him and he hugs him and he says, I missed you so much. No. What does he do? He says, שמע ישראל ה' אלוקינו ה' אחד. He starts reading Shema. It's a very anti-climactic moment. Twenty-two year separation. Yosef desperate to see Yaakov, Yaakov ostensibly desperate to see Yosef. And in that moment where they reunite, in the embrace, as they hug a father and his favorite son, what does Yaakov do? He says Shema. He says Shema. Says Rav Yerucham, how could it be? How could it be? To say Shema? גם כן כשבנו מתנפל עליו בנשיקות וחיבוקים, לא מופרש מחברתו, כאילו לא נגע בו כלל? Maybe he was already saying Shema, Yosef walks in the room, hugs him and kisses him. Okay, it's an interrupt your Shema. Whether he initiated Shema or he just kept saying Shema, how could he keep going in that moment? In that moment, how could it be? And if it was, so you'll say, let's say you're a brisker, and you'll say, you don't have to be a brisker, you're the halachic man. And the halachic man says, well, it was zman Krias Shema was expiring. It was almost the last opportunity to say Shema. And Yaakov had to be yotzei zman Krias Shema. If that's the case, why is only Yaakov saying Shema? Why isn't Yosef saying Shema? This is the question of the Maharal. Many bring down, the Maharal asks this question. If Yaakov is saying Shema because he's running out of time, or maybe there's plenty of time left, but Yaakov thinks this is in this moment what a Jew should do, you memorialize and capture this moment by saying Shema, so why isn't Yosef saying Shema too? Says the Maharal, it wasn't the zman Krias Shema. יעקב קרא דוקא אז לפי שזו עבודת הצדיקים בזמן שמגיעה להם שמחה ותשועה גדולה, מתעורר מיד בלבם תשוקה להעלות שבח לקדוש ברוך הוא ולדבק באהבתו. A Yid who lives for Hashem in this world, while they get a personal enjoyment and a geshmak, they have a moment of reconnection, of reconciliation, everything is experienced and interpreted through their relationship with Hashem. And before they can even embrace their long lost son, stop and say, thank you, Hashem. One of the fathers of one of the hostages, we saw did that. Before he hugged his son, he made a bracha, shehecheyanu. He thanked Hashem for that moment, and only then, only when he put in that context, did he hug his son. So not a criticism of those who didn't. But that was a modern-day imitation lest you read this Rashi and say, who could live that level, did he really do it that way? That was so long ago. No. Couple months ago, one of the fathers of one of the hostages before he would hug her and embrace them again made a bracha. He thanked Hashem before he embraced his own son. So בשעה שפגש את יוסף הזדרז לקרוא קריאת שמע לייחדא יחודא עילאה. He first was the you saw the unity of Hashem, the greatness of Hashem. Now Yosef couldn't read shema. she'haya mechuyav what did Yosef have that Yaakov didn't? Why did Yosef have another obligation that superseded his saying shema in that moment? What was Yosef bound by? Kibud Av V'em. So Yosef had to show cover to his father, he'd get to the shema later. But Yaakov not bound by Kibud Av V'em first, says shema and only then hugs Yosef. The Birchas Peretz, the steipler quotes this Mishna Berurah. He quotes the Mishna Berurah and then he adds, עצה ועל יוסף לא היה יכול לקרא קריאת שמע מאחר שהיה מחויב ולפניו היה מצות כיבוד אב מחויב ולא תכן כלל שיעשה גדר מדרגה של מידת חסידות ולבטל מצות כיבוד אב מחויב זהו נגד התורה אין זה חסידות כלל. ואין לפנים משורת הדין אלא לאחר שמקיים חובות הדין. Yaakov acted in an extraordinary fashion. He was entitled to because there was no mitzvah to do. But Yosef who had a mitzvah to do was not entitled to act in another extraordinary fashion at that moment. Okay, that's where, that is that's the Birchas Peretz. Rav Weinfeld also has something to say about this, actually we'll come back to Rav Weinfeld in a moment. First, Rav Volbe. Rav Volbe writes, quotes this Mishna Berurah, and why specifically shema? Shema, Kriyas Shema writes Rav Volbe b'shirei chumesh, Kriyas Shema hi dveikus. ולכך ברגע זה של הפגישה עם יוסף קרא קריאת שמע כדי להתחזק בדבקות. Yaakov tried to channel the emotion, the relief, the joy into a connection clinging to Hashem. Yes, he would celebrate with Yosef. They'd break bread, they drink L'Chaim, they'd spend the rest of life together. But that moment where he was experiencing this surge emotionally, he didn't want to squander it. He channeled it and used it and attached it to clinging to Hashem how? Through shema. Chazal tell us on the pasuk Rigzu v'al techtau, לעולם ירגיז אדם יצר טוב על יצר הרע אם נצחו מוטב ואם לאו יעסוק בתורה. The pasuk tells us a person has a Yetzer Hora. What should you do to overcome the Yetzer Hora? Learn Torah. If it doesn't work, say shema. Said Rav Volbe, מכאן ראיה שקריאת שמע היא סגולה שכשמתגבר היצר הרע יכול האדם להתגבר עליו על ידי יחוד שמו יתברך. The methodology to overcome the Yetzer Hora is to connect, to attach through shema. Because shema is Hashem, I see you and I feel you. I know you're everywhere. The whole world is you. Is you. לומדים כאן הנהגות אבותינו הקדושים. We learn here the practice of our holy forefathers. Yaakov חיכה ליוסף עשרים ושתיים שנה. Yaakov waited 22 years. ועכשיו ברגע זה שהוא פוגש אותו אינו עושה שום דבר. He doesn't hug him, he doesn't kiss him, he doesn't cry, he doesn't say anything, he says shema. Zeh Yaakov Avinu. That is the strength, that is the mindfulness, the presence of Yaakov, of a Jew. And that's the madrega. When we say Elokei Yaakov in the Amida, זאת אומרת שאף פעם הוא לא שכח את בורא עולם. He never forgot for a moment Hashem. He lived the שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד. Hashem was opposite him always. And that's what we're capable of too, to live our life and to see Hashem in that same way. He continues Rav Volbe he says, you see from this a menuchas hanefesh. Yaakov doesn't get too high or too low, hishtavus, equanimity, it's all equal to me. Yaakov has a menuchas hanefesh. A menuchas hanefesh. Even though he's meeting his son whom he missed, whom he longed for, whom he was worried was killed, was dead, he has a menucha. There's a certain he doesn't get too excited. There's a menucha he has, a menucha. הגדולים החמירו בזה writes Rav Volbe. Our Gedolim were machmir to live a life not to get too high, not to get too low. Never too happy, never too sad. When a person is hishtavus, הכל שווה שיוויתי ה', when you see Hashem equal and opposite you always, when you're living life knowing it's all orchestrated from above, then you're able to live with a menucha, with a. with a *menucha*, with a *menuchas hanefesh*. *lo l'hishtanos*, כך חיו שם כך מתו. זו תמונה של אדם תורני שלם. Somebody who's really guided and lives Torah is able to maintain that incredible sense of that *menuchas hanefesh*. Rabbi Weinfurt points out, *pasuk* tells us, *vayera eilav*. What does that mean? In this reunion, what happened? *vayera eilav*, Yosef appeared to Yaakov. It's not stressing Yosef saw his father, but Rav Naftali Trop, I saw this brought down also by others, the, Rav Chaim Kanievsky also quotes that it's not stressing that Yosef saw his father, but rather that Yosef was seen by his father. Meaning, as happy, as excited as Yosef was for what it meant for him, in that moment all he could think about was his father. I want to be seen by my father. His father, his needs. He was completely consumed by honoring, by caring about, by bringing a joy to his father. Why? Because being seen by his father would bring him joy. To know that he was giving his father *nachas ruach*, he was restoring life in his very father, that's what he lived for. The same idea is quoted by the Rebbe Reb Shmelke of Nickolsburg. *Pasuk* says in *Tehillim*, צמאה נפשי לאלוקים לקל חי מתי אבוא ואראה פני אלוקים. *Pasuk* specifically says *v'eira'eh*, not *v'er'eh*, not I long to see Hashem, but I long to be seen by Hashem. Because it's not about seeing our creator, it's about being seen. It's about showing up. It's about caring about him. It's the same idea of the way that Yosef lived it here as well. Oh, we had more? Okay. We'll have to pick up. *amusa ha'pa'am*. Yaakov says, now I'll only die once. What do you mean? How many times does a person die? We're not a cat. We don't have nine lives. *amusa*, now I'm only going to die once because I see you're alive. What did he mean? *Mefarshim* explain what he meant was, Yosef, had you assimilated, had you intermarried, had you mixed into the Egyptians that you lost your identity and your values and everything I taught you, I would have been dead inside. I would have been dead. Okay, maybe I would have had a pulse, I would have physically lived longer, but I would have been dead inside. But now that I see that you're alive, not only physically but spiritually, vibrant and alive, you remember what we were learning, I see you're alive, now *amusa ha'pa'am*, I'm only going to die once when I physically die, but knowing I have a continuity, a legacy, a future, now I'm only going to die once and who cares about that death? Physical death we'll all have. We're all mere mortals. That death I was never worried about. That one death I could live with. That one death I could live with. But *amusa ha'pa'am*, now I know I'm only going to die once because I see you're alive. What a powerful idea. We'll pick up with it *b'mirtzas Hashem* next time. Stay happy, stay healthy, stay holy.
