Transcript
Good morning, *boker tov*, welcome back to living with *emuna*. I have to tell you, I enjoyed and loved our vacation. It wasn't a vacation, it was a family trip. If you want to know the difference between the two, I'm happy to tell you all about it another time, but our family trip was fantastic and phenomenal. Among the things that I missed was this *shiur*, was the living with *emuna*. As I say, I don't know if you believe me, this is really for me. It's my support group that inspires me and motivates me to remember and to live and to practice what we preach, to live with *emuna*. So I really missed it. It's great to be back together. I'm so glad that you're here. Those who are in person, afterwards, we'll continue with our question and answers, trying to motivate and inspire people to come in person and gotta give a little bit more content to those who live locally. So afterwards, we have our question and answer on any topic. *Halacha*, *hashkafa*, anything that you think is controversial, anything that you think is sensitive, on any topic we do in person afterwards, not streaming and not recorded, but wherever you are and to be part of learning together *emuna* is very, very special. *Emuna* series is generously sponsored. We remain very grateful to our dear friends Avi and Bella Morgan in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut, in memory of Bella's mother, Dr. Ellen Shanzer, and in honor of our Israeli soldiers and please G-d, in the prayer of their return of all of the hostages. This morning's *shiur* is sponsored *l'ilui nishmas* בת שבע ברכה בת שמעון. נשמה שתהיה לה עליה. Sponsored by Dr. Aaron Kablow in honor of his dear wife, our dear friend Yvette, who had a successful surgery. She should have a speedy and a painless and a complete *refuah sheleimah*. We need Yvette back at full strength. It's sponsored this morning for a *refuah sheleimah* שרה מלכה בת מינדל אסתר who had surgery, having surgery this morning. It should go smoothly, be successful, she should have a complete and speedy *refuah sheleimah*. And I personally want to dedicate our learning this morning to two very special families, two dear friends of ours who did tremendous *chesed* for us this summer, our dear friends Rachel and Alex Katz and Danielle, Daniel, and Danielle Schneller, who were very helpful to us. And I want to say what makes them outstanding, and they'd be upset for me calling them out and thanking them publicly, but from the bottom of our hearts, what makes them outstanding: when someone does you a favor, but acts and makes it like you're doing them the favor, there's nothing kinder in the world. Because it's hard to receive and it's hard to take and it's hard to need help. And when someone does something nice for you and does it in such a way that they make you feel like you're doing them a favor, it's the highest level. So they've taught us both, both those families have taught us in the friendship and the help they gave us this summer. So a huge, huge thank you to the Katzes and to the Schnellers. And we get back into our learning together. So one of the things when I travel, when I take a break, is having the privilege to meet people all over and from all over who are part of our network and our community. And I say this and I submit this to you as humbly as I can. I have the *zchus* to sit on this side of the table on the camera and to learn the *emuna* that we're learning, to read the emails that I receive, but it's all of us. Don't make any mistake, we are a community and a movement of people who are working on living with *emuna*. And when I run into people all over saying embrace your place, you are where you're meant to be, let go and let G-d, and we're working on it and we're growing in it, it is so inspiring and so gratifying and it moves me so deeply and it motivates me to say we need to double and triple and get more people in our community. Because we're not some cult and I don't get any benefit and I don't make one penny off of any of the merch or off of any of the *shiurim*. All the sponsorship and everything goes to help our *shul* and to help our community to continue to teach. It's not about me, but it's about us. It's about we. And it's such an honor and such a privilege. And we have some big ideas and please G-d, we'll share them this year to be able to expand and grow and reinforce and help. I missed, I got back to this morning was the first morning back at our *kol haboker* 6:15 with my cup. That was reminding me to caffeinate with *kavana*. Now, I caffeinated the whole time I wasn't here. I promise you, I caffeinated every day that I wasn't here, but I can't tell you I caffeinated with as much *kavana* as I do when I look at that cup and it is a vivid reminder challenging me every morning. Don't forget, don't just gobble and gulp down the coffee, but caffeinate with *kavana*. So we have ideas we want to do more and spread more and share more, but I just wanted to express how grateful I am to you, those in person and those who join us online. And we're really a community and we're really a *chevra* and we're really reinforcing and supporting one another and changing our lives. And I'll just share with you some of these emails because I think they express this. And they inspire us when we see other people tapping into that *emuna* and joining that hotspot to be able to navigate the complications of life, it's tremendously inspiring. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, during the first week of *bein hazmanim*, I got a phone call from a good friend. She was the one who introduced me to the Living with Emuna *shiurim* three years ago. Her family were walking through the Rova when they couldn't believe they saw you and your wife. She was so excited she called me last night to share the hashgacha she felt that she ran into you and got a nice shmooze with the rebbetzin. I'd be much more excited about that. The funny part was I just listened to the last shiur about how people keep bumping into your travels to Budapest through Zurich. So I thought maybe Rav Goldberg's going to switch from plane stories to running into Rav Goldberg stories, which I would love to. So keep running into people. It's so gratifying. Then the author of the email continues, then last night I was with my family walking through the Old City, which even though we do live in Israel, we usually go Chol HaMoed Pesach and Succos. We got dinner in the Rova and then while waiting for my husband to finish benching we saw not Rabbi Goldberg, but Rabbi Sheller from One Time One Time stories, which my kids love listening to after the Living with Emuna podcast, of course. My kids were so excited, my boys took a picture with him. As soon as he walked away my kids said, hashgacha, because we were waiting for Tati and stopped in the restaurant to eat. And I thought every encounter with every person is a hashgacha story because that person is exactly who Hashem wanted me to meet right now. When the encounter feels so impossible, like meeting Rabbi Goldberg although we could just fly to Boca or Rabbi Sheller, it's a wow feeling and everyone should have the same wow. Everyone you run into, everyone you meet, every conversation you have, every encounter we experience, it's all orchestrated. It's all curated. It's all designed from above and each is a micro moment, each is a hug and a wink and each is a wow moment. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, I hope this email finds you well. Chasdei Hashem this past Thursday morning, I gave birth to a beautiful, delicious baby girl. We named her on Shabbos, Orly Emuna, my light is emuna. I've been an avid listener to Living with Emuna for years now and throughout the years have been through different stages in life while listening. And this is the reason I'm sharing this email because there are people who need to hear it and who please God will one day be writing the same email. I remember vividly listening in my apartment as a single girl waiting for my chosson. I remember the tears, the pain, the dark thoughts of wondering when it will be my turn? How much longer do I have to stay here? Two years later when Baruch Hashem I got engaged to my husband, I remember listening to the shiurim and thinking how I was only able to stay grounded during singlehood because of my emuna. I truly felt and believed only Hashem knew who my chosson was, where he is in life, and why he's perfect for me. I would repeat that in my davening and in my head over and over and now, after a little over a year and a half of marriage, I'm listening to the shiurim with my beautiful Orly Emuna in my arms. This name has such tremendous meaning to my husband and I as Orly Emuna is a constant reminder, gives us chizuk that in our life our shining light and guiding hand is our emuna. Emuna is the essence of our lives and the air we breathe. B'ezras Hashem I daven Orly Emuna truly lives by the essence of her special name. Thank you for the emuna boost, best regards. Those emails, the track, I remember living and listening and learning and working on emuna in this difficult stage and wondering when my time will come and when will this happen and when will that occur? And then to be able to look back, to be able to name a baby Orly Emuna, my light, my emuna. Those who are in those moments and those stages and those who are waiting for those things to happen, wait patiently and know there's a plan and know when it happens it will all be worth it because Hakadosh Baruch Hu has something in store. Whatever it's meant to be and if it's what we drew up and it's exactly what we're waiting for or it's a different outcome or conclusion, it's not it's not something which is coincidental, it's not random and it's not chance. It's all by design and it's all for us. Rabbi Goldberg, I very much enjoy listening. There's a lot, I don't have all of them. I read all of them and I respond to all of them, but I can't share all of them because we want to get to our Torah learning. So I just grabbed a few, but it's been a few weeks, so there are many. I very much enjoy listening to the shiurim, yada yada, blah blah. Thank you for your kind words. I often think about the line you commonly speak about of embrace your place, you are where you're meant to be. I happened to stop at the gym on my way home from work to take an exercise class. It was a long day and I considered not going because I was tired, but I decided to go and not cancel. About halfway through the class feeling exhausted and partially regretting my decision, I looked up at a wall that I hadn't looked at before and there it was. In the African-American owned gym in New Jersey a sign that read, "Embrace your place, you're exactly where you're meant to be, let's get it." I thought for a moment, "Does the gym owner listen to Living with Emuna?" Needless to say, seeing this on the wall energized me for the second half of the class and in the end I was glad I did it. Thank you for the inspiring me with the Living with Emuna. And here is a picture of the wall in the gym in case you doubt it. Motivational quotes: embrace your place, you're exactly where you're meant to be, let's get it from that gym. I want a piece of the revenue. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, my aunt is a daily listener of your shiurim and would like to share the following amazing story. She sat shiva last week after her husband passed away suddenly from a heart attack at age 47. The shock was extreme as he had always been healthy and vibrant and this was so unexpected and of course we send our wishes for strength and comfort and to get through this difficult time. After the shiva a volunteer member of the Misaskim team gently explained that the ripped clothing worn throughout the week needed to be discarded immediately in a non-Jewish garbage can. There are different minhagim surrounding mourning and aveilus and I guess this particular minhag the Misaskim. In Lakewood has the minhag that the garment that you tear when grieving and mourning should be thrown out in a non-Jewish garbage can. She and her family changed to fresh garments and gathered at the front door to escort his neshama out. As they opened the door, they were met by an astonishing sight. Right in front of the house was a garbage truck in the middle of its route. The sight was nothing short of miraculous. They know the garbage schedule well. The truck arrived precisely at 6:00 AM daily for five years they've been living in Lakewood, and yet on that day, there it was patiently waiting for them at 11:45 AM as if it had been summoned specifically for the purpose. Adding to this beautiful moment after a dreary rain-soaked week, the moment they stepped outside, the sun was shining. With the garbage truck right at the doorstep, they were relieved of the burden of searching for a garbage can in the heart of Lakewood owned by a non-Jew, which I imagine is hard these days. And the moment felt like a direct kiss, hug, and wink from Hashem right in the middle of their sorrow. If you can share the story with your listeners, it would give her much chizuk and nechama, and we wish both of those for her. And again, you can come out and say, oh, what a coincidence, there's a garbage truck just when we needed it, or you can say thank you even in this sorrow and even in this moment that you've taken someone so precious from us. Even in this moment, even in the darkness, we can see light. Even in the pain, we can see Hakadosh Baruch Hu, your wink and your hug. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, I'm an avid listener from London. Your shiurim have changed my perspective on life. Hearing your voice in my head telling me how to embrace my place, I want to tell you what happened to me yesterday. It links to an emuna story you told in your shiur two episodes ago. I was driving back from camp, which was four hours from London, and all the passengers in my car were asleep. I decided to play your Living with Emuna shiur as I felt it would keep me awake. Many have the opposite experience, but the letter you were reading from was from a man who had been in a car accident. Your message was that when we wake up in the morning, we have no idea what Hashem has in store for us, car troubles, for example, and we must wake up saying whatever Hashem has planned will be for the best. About an hour later, my car was low on petrol. Let me translate for you: gas. So I went to a petrol station, which was out of petrol. I waited for 30 minutes while they refilled the machines and in that time my car battery died. The whole thing was such a detour and wasted an hour of my time. I needed to jump-start my car. It was only when I was back in the car driving that I remembered you had just spoken about Hashem and his infinite wisdom had decided I needed to wait an hour before continuing on the journey home. If I hadn't listened to the reminder prior, which specifically mentioned Hashem's involvement even in car troubles, I might not have recognized Hashem's plan in that moment. It really felt like a "Hi, I'm here" message from Hashem and I'm grateful for the constant reminders how to live with emuna. Thank you for everything that you do, blah, blah, blah, yada, yada, yada, thank you for your kind words. So we can have a chapter in the Embrace Your Place book. We have our airplane stories, we have our running into me stories, we have our car stories: car accidents, running out of gas, car battery dying, and near misses. But the common denominator and theme of the whole book and of all that we do is to live life with that perspective, to be able to flex those emuna muscles and see through those emuna glasses, and how transformed your life is, our lives are when we see these aren't coincidences and they're not random and I'm not frustrated that it was an hour of my life I'll never get back because this is what was meant to be. This is where I was supposed to be. This is what was supposed to happen. And who knows, if I was on the road earlier in this hour, what would have occurred? So be grateful when we do all that we can, we take all of our initiative, then what happens after that is all from Hashem. Hello, Rabbi Goldberg. Thank you as always for allowing us to send emuna stories, take time to read and respond even though you don't respond personally. I'm sure you get a ton. Thanks. I want to share the following emuna story. A very good friend of mine got gallbladder surgery the other day, was in a lot of pain. I decided to bring over some soup and a present that I knew would cheer her up. The moment I got in my car, it started to rain. As I was driving, it got worse very quickly, and then thunderstorms to the point I could barely see. I got to her safely, and as I drove back to my apartment, the streets were flooded. My car felt like a good chunk of it was in water. Baruch Hashem I made it to my apartment safely. When I started to drive my car, it started making huge gurgling and static noises. I drove it to the mechanic and he said it was a quick and easy fix and he wouldn't charge me for it. But there was an unrelated even bigger problem. My exhaust was barely hanging onto my car. It was beyond repair. If it fell off, it could have been a huge safety hazard. Although it's expensive to fix and I wasn't expecting it, I find it a huge bracha from Hashem because I did a mitzvah of helping a friend who is sick, Hashem orchestrated there be a huge thunderstorm so my car would make noises so I'd go to the mechanic, have the storm-related issue be easily fixable, and thereby have this problem in my car totally unrelated be found. Thank you, Hashem. Although I could look at it and say Oy, I wasn't expecting to have this issue or pay this much, instead I say wow, Hashem is very much looking out for me. The mechanic also said while we're waiting for the parts to come in, do not go on any highways. And it's good to know as I start clinicals again very soon. Thank you for strengthening the emuna muscle, letting me put on my emuna glasses. Have a great Shabbos. Another one for our chapter on cars. And I'll just read one more and then we'll get into our learning. more and then we'll get into the learning. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, I'm a single woman in my 40s and I recently went through a very painful disappointment in dating. I've been dating someone for a few months and I truly believed he was the right one for me. Things were going well. He had so many of the qualities I was hoping and davening for over the years. I was already feeling so grateful to Hashem that my single days were finally ending. I could start building the beautiful frum family I've dreamed of since I was a little girl. And then out of nowhere he ended it. It wasn't even initially upset, I wasn't even initially upset because I was so certain he'd come back after some time and then working through our challenges would make us even stronger. But a few weeks later I heard he got engaged. I was devastated and broken. I couldn't stop crying. Even though I knew Hashem loves me and is doing what's best for me intellectually, emotionally it felt like a harsh punishment. I kept wondering what I had done wrong, what I could have said or done differently. I replayed our conversations over and over in my mind feeling like I had somehow blown my chance. After a few days I realized I needed to strengthen my emuna. I searched for emuna in my podcast app and came across your podcast. I clicked on the first episode in the list, number 352, which is all about how rejection is really Hashem's protection and that it's not the Satan who blocks our path but the Malach Harachamim, the angel of kindness. Listening to that shiur felt like a direct hug from Hashem. It gave me the exact chizuk I desperately needed. Since then I've been listening to that episode and many others on repeat. What a tremendous zechus you have to be the shliach to deliver such comfort and perspective to people in pain and I couldn't agree with her more. Today I was listening to another shiur of yours in which you read an email from a woman who had once written to you as a dejected single just having received a no from a shidduch and was now writing again to share the news of her engagement. And that was last year, remember? So Rabbi Goldberg, please consider this my first email. I believe and trust in Hashem's master plan and if that man wasn't the right one for me I'll continue to wait patiently while living my best life. Imirtze Hashem I'll be writing to you again very soon, first to share my own engagement news and then be'ezras Hashem to share the news of a baby. Thank you for helping me through this difficult time. I look forward to sharing future yeshuos and simchas. Tizku l'mitzvos and may everything you do be a zechus for your family and klal Yisrael, which amen. I really appreciate. So I share these emails because they're not the introduction to the shiur, they're not a distraction from the shiur, they're not a cop out of my having to give the shiur, they are a shiur. When someone writes an email like that and says I pivoted in my reaction, in my emotion, in how my perspective, she is such an inspiration. What a shiur her email is, a piece of Torah. And it means that whatever's going to happen to us today or tomorrow or this week, whatever we're going through, whatever we're overcoming, whatever challenge we're navigating through, whatever we're patiently waiting for, we have it in us. We have that emuna muscle. Flex it, build it, grow it. We have those glasses. We can have that perspective. We can find Him, that light in the darkness, that hug and that wink and that love even within the pain. That knowledge that when one door closes it wasn't random, it's not the wind that blew the door closed, Hashem closed the door because He's going to open another. He closed the door to make sure we don't step off a cliff. He closed the door to make sure we don't walk right into trouble. He closed the door to make sure we're avoiding some future pain which is even worse than whatever we're going through because that door feels like it closed in our face. And as He closes a door He will open another. He will open another. And what feels sometimes like the Satan, another no from a shadchan, another only one line on a pregnancy test, another job interview, another rejection, another what feels like a door that's closing, we have to know and interpret and experience. We should extract and learn what could I do differently, how can I grow, how can I improve, how can I take more initiative? But once we've exhausted and done all we can, that door that closes that feels like the Satan is the Malach Harachamim, is the angel of kindness and compassion who's steering and guiding and helping and supporting and hugging and winking and loving us every step of the way. And this is not just the opium of the masses, this is not just a drug of choice to help us get through, this is the emes. This is the truth. This is the reality of the world that we live in. This is Him. He's everywhere and He's orchestrating everything. We have to endlessly thank Him for the good, whatever goes right, whatever works out well, every car ride that doesn't end with a dead battery or out of gas or an accident, every plane ride that ends in the destination we intended to be, any encounter, any everything. The end of each day our davening should be so long because we're looking back and saying all the things that went right. At the beginning of every day we turn to Him and say we need your help. Close this deal, let that work out, first day of school, new job, first day Elul, new zman, first day let this work, let that work, let the other thing come together, Hashem please please. please please please please. And what happens all too often and I find myself also falling prey to this very, very, very easy challenge, which is by the next day we're on to the next list of things that we need help with. But do we ever press pause to say thank you? Thank you Hashem, that worked out. Today's brachas are Hashem's yes to yesterday's tefillos. What you have going well today is Hashem's saying yes to what you davened so hard for yesterday. So do we say thank you at the end? Thank you the speech worked out. Thank you the deal went well. Thank you the meeting was a success. Thank you the trip, I got where I was meant to be safely and on time. Thank you, thank you. Do we say thank you afterwards and do we see His hand? He'emanti ki adaber we've said so many times. So many tzaddikim bring down, we grow our emuna, He'emanti ki adaber. We live with more emuna when we speak, when we talk, when we're thankful, when we see Hashem, when we see Hashem everywhere, everywhere. We landed yesterday Miami airport, for the first time in a long time, I don't know why or what I was thinking, maybe there were just too many details leading up to it, even when we landed ברוך השם בלי עין הרע, five of us, six suitcases, carry-ons, I hadn't arranged any way back from the airport. And as we're at the luggage, my incredible 12-year-old son says to me, Abba, how are we getting back? And I said, I don't know, I didn't figure it out yet, Hashem's going to send us a plan, Hashem's going to send us our ride. And he said to me, 'cause it must be a line that I use, he goes, "What is this, amateur hour?" Whenever we travel and I tell my kids, anyone have a liquid in their bag, take it out before security, if anyone does something wrong and it slows us down, I say, what is this, amateur hour? So I guess he was listening. So he said to me, Abba, you don't have a ride? What is this, amateur hour? Amateur hour. So anyway, I went on Uber and as it turned out, I didn't even know this. Did you know that Uber has an XXL option? Not only your regular Uber and not only an extra-large Uber, but there's an extra-extra-large Uber so that when you have five people and six suitcases, it can work out. Now, I hesitate to say this part, but I did put it on our family WhatsApp group about emuna. I said Hashem would send us someone, and he sent us, the driver's name was J-E-S-U-S, Jesus. Hashem sent us our driver, and it wasn't amateur hour. I'm a professional emuna person, so it's not amateur hour. If you live as a professional emuna, then it's never amateur hour. Okay, maybe I didn't take the initiative I should have, I could take some blame there, but Hashem always has a plan about how you're getting home. We're on page kuf-chaf-alef, we're still living learning Rav David Abuchatzeira's incredible Emuna u'Vitachon. I do not have the English ArtScroll version. I'm not saying that so someone sends it to me as a gift. Baruch Hashem, I'm happy with the Hebrew original, but it means I can't tell you what page it corresponds with. We are on the chapter, there's no chapter numbers, but it's the chapter that's called עבודה שהשם דווקא מהמצב שנמצא בו עכשיו, to serve Hashem specifically in the place that you find yourself right now, that's the name of the chapter. So I don't know what chapter it is in the ArtScroll wonderful translation that came out, that's what we're up to. That's page kuf-chaf-alef, 121, in our Hebrew edition of Emuna u'Vitachon of the great Rav David Abuchatzeira. Okay, לאחר הידיעה הזו יכולנו להבין כי לשם תיקון הרגע המיוחד המצפה שיתקן האדם אינו דווקא בשעה שהכל זורם לו למישרים ואין שום מונע מטריד את מנוחת נפשו. A person, what we began with last time, just to bring you back because it's been a few weeks. We started last time with the Chidushei haRim. The Chidushei haRim said, the Rabbis when they tell us in the Heilige Pirkei Avos, in the holy Pirkei Avos it says, אם לא עכשיו אימתי. One of the great teachings of Hillel is, if not now, when? If not me, who will be for me? If I'm only for myself, then what am I? And אם לא עכשיו אימתי, if not now, when? אם לא עכשיו אימתי means, if not now, when? Don't be lazy, don't procrastinate, don't push off. Take it right now. You thought about calling someone? Call them right now. Don't delay, don't do it later. Im lo achshav, if not now, when? When? This is Elul. You began Elul. This is it, the march, the count, Rosh Hashanah, the New Year, the new us, our best year, our best selves. Im lo achshav, if you're not going to be determined to be that person, that husband, that wife, that mother, that father, that eved Hashem, that son, that daughter, that chevrusa, take it on. Whatever you've been waiting for to introduce into your day. It's time to organize your life. Literally your closet, your kitchen, or your schedule, your finances, your health and wellness. Im lo achshav, if not today, when? Let's go! We got this! Im lo achshav, today's the day. It's Elul. If not now, when? אם לא עכשיו אימתי. That's the classic translation and understanding. Don't be lazy, don't push off, don't say I'll get to it, don't say one day, don't say if this were to happen, then I would. No, no, no, those are all excuses. Im lo achshav, take extreme ownership. Don't wait. We have no idea what today or tomorrow will bring. We don't know what will be, and if not today, eimasai, when? But the Heilege Chiddushei HaRim, the great Gerer Rebbe said, Im lo achshav means if you don't take advantage of achshav, eimasai, it's gone. This moment, who you're sitting next to in the Emunah shiur, who you'll encounter on the way out, who you'll have the opportunity to check in on and say hello to, this moment won't return, it won't come back. Every moment is pregnant with possibility. Every moment, every encounter, every conversation, once it's gone, it's never coming back. And if we don't embrace and grasp and live it fully, we squander the opportunity and the chance. We have to live with such a mindfulness and a mentality that every moment is our moment. Every moment we're doing what we're meant to be doing. אין לך אדם שאין לו שעה Chazal say also in Pirkei Avos. אין לך דבר שאין לו מקום. When there's no person who doesn't have his hour and there's nothing that doesn't have its place, it doesn't just mean that you know everyone has their hour, their 15 minutes of fame, everyone has their good luck, everyone's going to have No, that's not what it means. It means אין לך אדם שאין לו שעה, every person has their hour, their moment where you're meant to be doing. ואין לך דבר שאין לו מקום, and everything, every table, every chair, every computer, every microphone, everything has its purpose and its mission. Why are we here? What are we meant to do? What is life all about? How do we live fully everything that we're doing? Don't be haphazard and don't sleepwalk through life and don't squander it and don't be mindless and don't just give in to the people and the peer pressure that's happening around us, but look in the mirror this Elul and say who am I, what am I meant to be doing, what's my mission, my purpose, what's my life all about, and how do I get it together? How can I finally get it together to live the life I'm meant to live? Because it's never too late to be who you're meant to be. This is your year, this is your week, this is your day, this is your hour, this is your moment. אין לך אדם שאין לו שעה. We all have our moment, but that moment is waiting for from us that no one else can do, that no one else can do. And once we know this, that means we can understand כי לשם תיקון הרגע המיוחד, we are here to repair and to fix and to fully live that moment that is designated specifically for us. Hamatzape sheyesadreno ha'adam, that moment is waiting for us to fix it. Make that bracha out loud in this moment. Pick up that garbage on the shul campus that everyone else walked by. Put the chair back in its place so the room looks organized and there's order. That moment is waiting for us for that moment. It's waiting. It's waiting for us to fix something. It's waiting for us to make that phone call, send that email, respond to that text, organize that thing, learn that idea, say that Tehillim. אינו דוקא בשעה שהכל זורם למישרים אין שום מונע מאחוזת מנוחת נפשו כי ודאי אם הקדוש ברוך הוא שלח את הרגע הזה. If Hashem sent you in that place at that time for that moment אלי אותי כי בזה חפץ הקדוש ברוך הוא. That's a sign that he wants you there, a sign that there's something you're meant to do there. So if the gas station is out of gas and your car battery dies and you have to sit there for an hour, ask yourself, open your eyes and look around and say what am I meant to fix, why am I here right now? Not I can't believe this happened to me and woe was me and this always happens and God hates me, I can't believe it. In every moment and every time, what does this moment demand? What is it inviting from me? Why am I here? How can I fix it and elevate it? How can I be transformed by it? שדוקא במצב זה אעבור אותו וכך אסדרנו. Why am I sitting next to this person on the plane? Why am I checking out on this line with this checkout person? Why am I what does this moment demand and ask of me? Why am I in a car with screaming kids? It's only the first day of carpool school. How am I going to survive an entire year? What does this moment demand from me? What does Hashem, what do these kids need to see me react? What's the right message I'm supposed to say right now to get this carpool going right in the right direction, to get this year of carpool off to the right start? Therefore our great Tanna says in Pirkei Avos, אל תאמר לכשאפנה אשנה שמא לא תפנה. Don't ever say when I get free, when I have free time, when my schedule allows it. then I'm gonna get to it. I'll go—I hear people, I heard about the Emunah shiur, when my schedule frees up I plan to go to it one day, one day. I'm not talking about the person who's doing three shifts in the ER who tells that to me. I'm talking about the retiree who says one day when my schedule, when I can wake up, when I can organize my life and the mahjong and the things, I'll get to it. Don't ever say likshe'efoneh eshneh, when I have time I'll learn. Why? Shemma lo tiponeh. If there's one thing this world and this life has taught us is how uncertain and unpredictable it is. How many people said one day I'll get to it and they never got that day or that chance. How many conversations that haven't happened that could happen, that it's too late to have happened? How many relationships that could or should be repaired or fixed, but they remain forever broken? How much learning that could have happened? How many... how many places because we visited when we can? Don't say when I have time, but take extreme ownership of your life, identify your priorities, your goals, your ambitions. What is this year, תשפ"ו? What is next year? What is this year? Next year is in three weeks. Oy. The way you react to Pesach is what that just did to me. But next year, next year is in three weeks. Next year is not next year. Next year is in three weeks. So what is this year? What are we waiting for? מבואר הרבי הקודש רב משה מקוברין אל תאמר לכשאפנה ממחשבות זרות מן היצר הרע אז אשנה שמא לא תפנה שמא נבראת על אופן זה שלעולם לא תפנה. Don't say when my mind is free. Right now I have so many things I worry about, so many things I'm anxious about, so many problems, so many things. You know what? When I have some serenity, when I have some menuchas hanefesh, when I have some peace of mind and some calm, when I have an empty nest and my kids go off to school, when they return. You know all year long we can't wait for the summer. No carpool, no homework, no bedtime, we can't wait for the summer. Then all summer, I can't wait for school to start. And then school starts. We're in this vicious cycle of always waiting for when that happens, then I can. Guess what? That cycle's never ending. There's always something. God forbid, when you're finally not driving the carpool and taking care of your kids, your schedule is filled with your doctor's appointments. There's always something. There's always something that will fill your schedule and make it feel like it's not your own. So if a person says likshe'efoneh when I am free. So the classic understanding means free in my schedule, free in time. What Rav Moshe of Kobrin introduced was likshe'efoneh means free in my thoughts. When I'm no longer worrying about my finances and my health and all my kids being married and what will be with this and what will be with that, and when I have some menuchas hanefesh, when I have some peace of mind and some serenity, then Rabbi, then I'll come to the Emunah shiur, then you can count on me to host people hachnasas orchim, then I'm going to give to the capital campaign, then I'm going to be on a committee, then I'm going to... there'll always be something. There'll always be something. Don't wait because our mind and our head will always shemma lo tiponeh. You'll never be in a place and a point where you're not worried about something. I'm reading a book, one of the books I was reading this summer, called 4000 Weeks. It's an amazing, extraordinary book. It's ostensibly about time management, but the whole book is essentially about stop thinking you can manage time, think about time altogether differently. It's an amazing book. And I'm going to bring to the Emunah shiur a couple pages where he talks about how we lose all of our time because all of our time is consumed with trying to, is trying to manipulate and maneuver and own and predict our future. And how much of the present we forfeit because we're doing that. And I just wanted to jump into the pages of the book and grab the author by his collar to say his answer is not what he describes. The answer is Emunah. The answer is Emunah. The answer and the result of how to live a meaningful life and a serene life and a productive and a purposeful life is not his conclusion, but is our conclusion about... but he's basically describing so articulately the same idea shemma lo tiponeh like Rav Moshe of Kobrin lehavdil. But he's describing your mind is never going to be free. So today you're worried about carpool and which class and did he get placed where he was supposed to and will he have the teacher that we wanted? And they always tell me they will, but they don't, and they said they wouldn't break it up this way but they definitely did break it up that way, and will they switch it and will it work out and how's it going to be and will they adjust and is it going to be right? Now that's your worry. And what, in the next chapter of your life, the worry is going to be that same kid, small kid small problems, big kid big problems. Now you're going to be worried about will they get married and will they be free... fertile and have children? Then you're going to be worried about you: do I have enough to retire and can I live off of this, and how is my health, and are my knees and my hips still working, are my joints, can I—shema—you're never going to shema lo tipaneh. I don't know anyone who could point to that period of life where they could say: I've arrived, I'm done, I'm finished worrying. Check, check, check. So what did you need from me? Because I'm good now. I've finished. I have nothing on my mind. I'm free. I've accomplished, I've achieved, I have nothing I need to take care of, nothing I need to think about, nothing I'm anxious or worried about. So, rabbi, what do you—what have you—what do you have for me? I have yet to meet that person. You know why? Because they don't exist. They have never existed and they never will exist. Shema lo tipaneh. שמא נבראית על אופן זה שלעולם לא תיפנה. We were created so that in any moment we'll have something to be thinking about: what am I meant to do in that moment? כי יש ונברא בעבור שיעבוד את השם יתברך בעבודה כזו אשר לא לעולם לא תיפנה ודווקא ממקום זה תשלם עבודתו. Stop trying to get to that place. You know, there's a movement in the email world called Inbox Zero. Anyone know of the Inbox Zero movement? Whose whole life is determined to get to Inbox Zero. I've played the Inbox Zero game. I love the Inbox Zero game. When I win the Inbox Zero game, I take a screenshot of my Outlook inbox that says something like, 'wonderful, you're done for the day.' You know why I take a screenshot of it? Then I send it to everyone I'm trying to impress—my family, my colleagues. You know why I take the screenshot? Do you know how long it lasts? Five seconds. The Inbox Zero logo... I wish I ever got to five seconds, because the emails just keep coming in. There is no Inbox Zero. You'll never be able to say: Inbox Zero, done for the day. I have no email, I have no WhatsApp, I have no phone calls to return. So what do you have for me, because I'm finished, I'm done. You never get. So you never get to Inbox Zero and you never get to Inbox Zero in your head. There's always an inbox in your head. What's coming up next? What do I have to work on? What's going on? What am I thinking about? What am I focused on? You'll never get there. So if you spend your life chasing and pursuing a goal which is unattainable, that's a prescription for madness. Madness. But if you surrender and you forfeit and you realize that was never and never should be a goal. The goal is how to manage the inbox, set up filters, don't let the inbox become your to-do list. How do you manage it and live in that space that there'll always be something in your inbox? There'll literally be something in your inbox, in your email, and there'll always be something in the inbox in your head. That's your purpose, that's your goal, that's your mission, that's why you're here. Now lean into what's in your inbox. I'm not suggesting doing this in email, but in life, what Reb Moshe of Kobrin was saying, whatever enters your mental inbox is what you're meant to be working on in that moment. Your child that you're worried about, the person you want to check in on and call, the thing that you have to be doing, that thing that you're worried about. Hashem is sending you a sign and a signal: here's your assignment. This is your next mission. This is your purpose. This is your moment. Now go live it, now go fulfill it. ואכן אל יאמר לכשאפנה אשנה literally and figuratively, then I'll learn and I'll say Tehillim and I'll do chessed. Then I'll be a best version of myself, then I'll be the spouse, the parent, the child. ויהיה לו מנוחה מהדברים המפריעים לו, then I'll be able to perform the Torah and mitzvot with yishuv hadaas. No. Shema lo tipaneh. רק באופן הזה תהיה עליך לקיים המצווה. We are meant to, from this place and in this position and as that person, this is what we're meant to be doing. Emunah radically changed your life. Again, the parallel stops here. The metaphor is not perfect because Hashem—I mean, maybe he does or doesn't—but every email you get, you're not meant to respond to. Every email you get, you're not meant to stop what you're doing to deal with. Your inbox must not become your to-do list and your priority list. Don't let other people own your schedule. It's not true about email. But imagine if you could live with the clarity and confidence that every email that came in, everything in your inbox, was directly from Hashem. He is telling you: here are your marching orders, here's the formula, here's the playbook, here's what to do next. Wow, what a life. What a way to be. You're not bitter, you're not resentful, you're not filled with doubt—what should I do? You feel, okay, I feel good right now. This is what I gotta work on, this is what I gotta do next. This is what came in. That's what Hashem is telling us. When you live with emunah, you can look at your life and say, I'm not frustrated I had this plan and now this thing came. The thing that came was from Hashem because it's what I'm meant to be doing. It's what I'm meant to be doing. Now, this contradicts something I said a few weeks ago, I think they made a reel out of it... Right? So your poor planning that you didn't bother studying or writing the paper until one in the morning and now I have to stay up to help you with it, your poor planning is not my emergency. But this is the opposite perspective, which is: maybe your poor planning Hashem sent for me to take on as my emergency. Okay, now we're gonna have a conversation because it can't happen again. But maybe this time, maybe this time, whatever comes my way, it's what I meant to be doing. It's my moment. It's my task, it's my mission, it's my purpose. So that's the name of this chapter that the Dovrer Chatzarot is telling us: עבודת ה' דווקא מהמצב שנמצא בו עכשיו. It's not, I really want to serve Hashem, why did you send this flat tire, or the kid with no homework, or why did you give me this flu, or why did you make this job, this task at work, take much longer than it was supposed? I wanted to get to the shiur. I wanted to say Tehillim. I wanted to serve you. No, no, no. We're serving Hashem through whatever moment he sent our way. Don't view whatever we're doing as taking us away from the life that we want to live. Whatever he sends us to be doing is the life we're meant to live. He's giving us our mission. He's sending us on our shlichus. He's sending us our way. It's an altogether different way to live life, is to look at our life and say whatever in each moment, the mindfulness and a sense of purpose of what am I meant to do, what am I meant to accomplish, why am I here, why this encounter, why this person, why this place, why did I overhear that thing, why did this come into my lap? What am I meant to be doing now? עבודת ה' דווקא מהמצב שנמצא בו עכשיו. Serving Hashem specifically from the place where I am, where I am right now. V'kach hu meforesh, we'll do two more lines and then we'll turn this off and do our questions, question and answer. Rav Naftali of Ropshitz in his sefer Zera Kodesh, the holy Ropshitzer, explained. We just read this a couple weeks ago in shul. Moshe Rabbeinu turns to God, ואתחנן אל ה' בעת ההיא לאמר. Moshe turns to God and he davens. The gematria of Va'etchanan is 515. 515 times in a row he said to God, please, please, please, please, please, please, please let me go into the land. I've been a faithful servant. I've taken care of these people. My whole life goal, my whole mission is to enter that land, please, please reconsider. Please, please, please, please 515 times. שלא אמר באיזה איזה דיבר שעליה אמר בעת ההיא ללמדנו שבכל עת ועת יתפלל אדם לפי העת ההיא שנמצא עומד בה. It says ואתחנן אל ה' בעת ההיא לאמר. He davened to Hashem ba'et hahi at that time, saying, said the holy Ropshitzer, what he davened to Hashem was ba'et hahi. Hashem I daven that I live this moment. Va'etchanan el Hashem he davened to Hashem ba'et hahi lemor. Let me live this moment. יהא העת איזה אש שרק יהיה עד כאן לשון קדשו. וטמן בכל עת וכל שעה יכול כל יהודי להתפלל לבוראו גם מעין זה הזמן שמרגיש קירבה וזריזות בעבודתו וגם אם אין מוחו פנוי מכל וכל. Even if I'm distracted, even if we're going through a hard time, even if I'm not where I wanted to be or I meant to be. I wanted to be in a shul, and it turns out I have to daven on the side of the road, I didn't make that minyan, I got delayed, I couldn't chap that. Wherever I am, ba'et hahi, in that moment, Va'etchanan I can daven to Hashem. Wherever I am in that moment. Earlier a number of years ago, I was invited to a series of meetings, I'm saying this not to flex but to make a point, at the White House, one of which was with a previous, a previous president. And I happened to be in New York, I went to New Square to the Skverer Rebbe, I've been going for years to Skvere, and that's a whole history into itself, and I went to the Skverer Rebbe. And one of the things I asked him for was if I have the chance to speak in that meeting, in that small meeting, what should I say? And the Skverer Rebbe told me, ואתחנן אל ה' בעת ההיא לאמר. Daven to Hashem that ba'et hahi, that in that moment, lemor he'll give you the words to say. Va'etchanan el Hashem, you could turn and daven to Hashem that ba'et hahi, that in that moment, lemor. You're going into a difficult conversation, you're going into a difficult meeting, you're going into some... Va'etchanan el Hashem. This is what it means to live a life of emuna. It means that before you go into the boardroom, before you go into that meeting, before you go into that Starbucks, before you're having that hard conversation, you stop and you pause and you pray on it. Va'etchanan el Hashem to daven to Hashem ba'et hahi in that moment, lemor give me the right words to say, let the right words come out of my lips, let this be productive and effective, let it meet its goal. Ba'et hahi. Every one of us have what we're meant to do in that moment and we should daven that we fulfill our mission for every moment. Ba'et hahi. What should I say? How do I respond? What am I meant? What's my mission? How am I uniquely positioned unlike anyone else? That is a level of mindfulness, that's exhausting. Must be so hard. I can't say I'm there. I can't tell you what it's like, but I can picture how exhausting it must be. It must be. And yet, what a life! How exhilarating! How fulfilling! Halevai, im yirtzeh Hashem, we should all be successful in getting to that place and in living that life. It's great to be back together. We're going to turn off the recording now and hope you've given some thought for our question and answer on any topic. May we hear besoros tovos, Yeshuos venechamos.
