Transcript
Good morning, boker tov, welcome back to Living with Emuna. It's so great to be back together again. I want to thank our generous series sponsors for the year, Dr. Zavi and Bella Morgen in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut and in memory of Bella's mother, Dr. Ellen Shanser, who lived a life of great service to the Jewish community. Grateful to the Morgens for their generosity. This morning's shiur is also sponsored לעילוי נשמת שושנה פייגא בת חיים יצחק whose neshama should have an aliya. Also by Meryl and Jeremy Strauss in commemoration of the yahrzeit of Mr. Michael Strauss, alav hashalom. Thank you to our dear friends the Strausses. By Pam and Prosper Abitbol, commemorating the yahrzeit of her father Lester Greenberg, Eliezer ben Meir, the 12th of the year, his neshama should have an aliya. And last but certainly not least, by our very own Linda Gordon. Welcome back Linda! It's so great to have you! In honor of, oh look at that, in honor of the engagement of my daughter Liora Goldberg to Hillel Storch, and in honor of the engagement of Linda's lifelong friend, our lifetime member Andrea Scharlat to Ken Schnur, and for the refuah shleima of Linda's daughter Shelly, she should have a complete and speedy refuah shleima. So good to have you back, and so good to be back, so good to be together. Hi. So good to be together. Everyone's invited, Motza'ei Shabbos 9:30. Our daughter Liora, Linda sponsored this morning in honor of Liora's engagement. So 9:30, it's late at night, some of you it's way past your bedtime. If you're not a pumpkin, you are invited after you make havdalah to a little vort in honor of her engagement. Thank God we're so grateful to Hashem and to everybody. Okay, we are continuing B'yam Darchecha, Rabbi Itche Meir Morgenstern, Living with Emuna, Tefila, Hashem's presence in our life each and every day, to know that He's by our side, He's accompanying us through whatever we're going through. He gives us the resilience and the strength to be able to confront whatever comes our way and to know that whatever happens is for a reason, it's for a purpose, and that we will figure it out because it is what is meant to be. Before we turn back into the text that we're learning about simcha, how do we experience and how do we enjoy a sense of simcha? I want to repeat something I said yesterday at the parsha class. If you've heard it already I apologize, but it bears repeating because it's related to our topic and I want to relate it directly to something we've said in the past connected to simcha. Our parsha talks about the mitzvah of shmita. This year's a shmita year in Israel and around the world, it has relevance around the world as well. It is a shmita year. Every seventh year the farmer lets his land lie fallow. The farmer has an unpaid sabbatical. The farmer takes six years of work and toil and effort to build up his business and he or she turn their back on it. We had the privilege of hearing from Ilana Twig, her husband Doron, who are farmers in Israel. She spoke here on a Shabbos morning, we later interviewed her. If you did not see her on Behind the Bima, you must watch that interview. Fascinating to get an insight into the life of a farmer today and the heroes, it's what Chazal call those who observe shmita are the heroes of the Jewish people, who turn their back on all of their work and effort and spend a sabbatical year unpaid, unpaid. To have a paid sabbatical is no big deal, you're not a hero, but to have an unpaid sabbatical because that's what God says is extraordinary. It's well worth listening to her story. So in the shmita year we turn our, the farmer lets the land lie fallow, rejuvenate, re-energize, the farmer concentrates and recalibrates his or her compass to study Torah and to connect with emuna to Hashem. So the Torah tells us in our parsha, whether you're listening to this parsha Behar or any other time, the story and the insight are the same relevance. Torah says V'chi somru, you know what's going to happen? You're going to say, well what am I going to eat in the seventh year? What am I going to eat? How am I going to pay the bills? How am I going to pay the mortgage? An unpaid sabbatical? How am I going to get by? When you ask, so God answers, don't worry, you'll grow enough in the sixth year for the sixth, seventh, and eighth year. So the Noam Elimelech, Rabbi Elimelech of Lizhensk, wonders why didn't the Torah just tell us that every sixth year God will make enough grow for the sixth, seventh, and eighth? Why did it frame it or couch it, why did the Torah communicate to us in the sense of V'chi somru, when you'll ask, don't worry, God says, I got your back, there'll be enough in the sixth year for the sixth, seventh, and eighth. It's a great question of the Noam Elimelech, many answers are given. But Bender, Rosh Yeshiva of Darchei Torah in his beautiful commentary on Chumash, says the following answer. I said it yesterday in the parsha class, excuse me for repeating it, but it's relevant to our study of emuna and I'll connect it to something we've previously said. Says you know why the Torah's telling us that? Because this farmer's a little bit worried, a little bit anxious. What am I going to eat? And the Torah's telling us that's okay. It's okay to be a little worried. It's okay to be a little anxious. You know, a person undergoes lab tests, a person undergoes medical tests and you're waiting to get the results and to find out what will be, what's your diagnosis. So do you tell such a person, listen, go to Goldberg's emuna shiur... And then, you'll have no worry, no anxiety, you'll never look at the clock, you'll never check your phone or your email. Whenever they get back to you, they get back to you and whatever it will be, whether it's benign or malignant, it's up to Hashem, it's all for the good. If you really believe, you won't even remember you took the test. They'll get back to you when they get back to you. You won't even think about it in between. Is that what it means to live with emunah? Is living with emunah mean that you never worry, have anxiety, that you never show concern? So Reb Bender says, so beautifully, so powerfully, and he says not only for ourselves but how important to communicate to our children that it's okay to be concerned. It's okay to say I have a test and I don't know I'm a little nervous about how well I'll do. You say you studied to the best you can, the rest is up to Hashem. But if you have little butterflies, that's okay. He writes, this book was published during Corona, and he writes, you know, during Corona, our children overheard, normally children are at school all day, they don't hear our neurosis and anxiety. We're able to protect them from it. But during Corona, we were locked down together, they were exposed and they heard everything. And they felt: What will be? Who will be affected? Will this ever end? What will the world look like? Will it be familiar? And those are okay feelings and he quotes the Gemara Pesachim that tells us that in this world you say a bracha when something bad happens you say Dayan HaEmes. When something good happens you say Baruch Hatov VeHaMeitiv. In the next world we'll understand that even the things that are painful, they're not bad. Everything is from Hashem and we'll be able to make the bracha Hatov VeHaMeitiv even on that which feels painful. So let's say some groyse knacker, some big religious high roller, holy roller says, you know what, I lost my loved one, my house burnt down in a fire, I lost all my assets in the stock market. But you know what, I want to prove to the world how religious I am, I'm going to make a bracha Hatov VeHaMeitiv. I'm going to make a bracha how good Hashem is because I lost a loved one in my family. What are you crazy? That's a bracha levatala. In this world we don't make a bracha Hatov Ve... You're not impressing anybody and you're not a holy roller, you're a fake and a fraud. We saw the story about Rav, this is relating to what we saw earlier, the story about Rav Wolbe, who paid a shiva call. And when he paid a shiva call to a Rosh Yeshiva who had lost his wife, who said look I have emunah it's all from Hashem it's for the best, I'll get through it, and showed no grief and no sadness and reflected no pain and tried to present pure emunah, and Rav Wolbe turned to the talmid he had paid the shiva call with on the way out and said, this Rosh Yeshiva is going to crash and burn. He's not doing anything on purpose with malice, he's not intentionally trying to fake anyone out, but he's trying to present something that's just impossible to feel. The Torah wants you to grieve and wants us to mourn and wants us to be sad. Tonight tomorrow we'll commemorate last year's horrific tragedy in Meron, the loss of 45 lives. What do we just celebrate as always and say Hatov VeHaMeitiv, it's what Hashem wanted, a stampede in Meron, 45 young lives snuffed out. No, it's sad. And there's concern, I hope everything goes smoothly, I hope everything goes well, I hope everybody's safe, I hope everybody behaves. It's okay. VeChi Somru, when you'll ask, when you'll worry, when you'll wonder, what will we eat? The reason suggests Reb Bender the Torah presents it in that way is to tell us that emunah doesn't mean and this is so important to have this license. It's so important to have this permission. Now there's a fine line. To be overly anxious is a failure of emunah. To be overly anxious and to fear and worry and to be debilitated and paralyzed by worry and fear as if Hashem is not in the equation, as if Hashem doesn't have a plan, as if things won't happen the way they're meant to be, that's to knock God out of the equation. That's a failure of emunah. However, it's understandable and it's only reasonable and realistic that we have some concerns in life. It's only normal that you underwent a medical test and you're in shpilkes until you get the call. And don't feel guilty and don't feel that you're failing in emunah, feel that that's normal and that's expected and that's reasonable. But each time you feel that angst and that worry, comfort and strengthen yourself by saying look whatever will be will be, Hashem will be with me and he will take me through it and it'll be the way it's meant to be. But it's normal to get the feeling and then to comfort and respond to the feeling with the sense of emunah. To sit shiva and say with a smile that's Hashem's plan it's amazing that my spouse died at a young age because that's Hashem's plan, Hatov VeHaMeitiv. No that's a bracha levatala. In this world we don't fake. You can fake other people maybe you could fake yourself you certainly can't fake Hashem. And Rav Wolbe told this talmid it will catch up. And so that's a very very important message because we get together every week and we talk about if you live with emunah, if you feel his presence his guiding hand on your shoulder, then you won't be envious or arrogant or anxious and it is the solution and answer to everything. And I mean it and I believe it and I personally work on it. However, that doesn't mean it is to the exclusion of having license or permission to also feel the normal feelings of life, to worry, to be anxious, to be concerned. What will be? Will the email go out? Will everyone get it? Will they respond? Will it work? What will be? What will be? It's only normal, it's only normal in life. Okay, back to Simcha. ברוך אתה ה' אלהינו מלך העולם שהכל נהיה בדברו. Amen. Enjoy, everybody's caffeinating with kavana. Is the cup reminding you every day? The first bracha. 100 brachas a day. Rav Wolbe said 10 brachas a day. We said start with the first bracha. Kavana. Baruch, breicha, the flow, the blessing. Atah comes from you, Hashem. Eloheinu, you're not just an abstract God, you're Eloheinu, our God. Melech, you are the king. Ha'olam, olam, helam, it's hidden, but you are the king of the whole world, of the whole universe. Shehakol, that everything nihiyah, exists bidvaro, your word. Speech recognition. God, everything in this world exists with your will. That first bracha, shehakol, caffeinate with kavana. Wake up not only your body, wake up your soul, wake up your spirit, and connecting to Hashem, the first bracha of the day to feel His presence. Oh, He's in our day and He will carry and take us through whatever it is, whatever comes our way. I have us on page kuf nun zayin, 157. Page 157. 157. מצאו אצל עובדי השם יתברך שיש להם שאיפות גדולות. We find when it comes to servants of Hashem, when it comes to those who are genuinely occupied with serving Hashem, what comes with that are she'ifos, she'ifos, ambition, drive, goals. Ambition, drive, goals. Have to have it. You know how sad it is in life that too many people, they're complacent, they're stuck. We feel we've arrived, we're done, finished products. You hear from people all the time they reached a ripe old age. They feel there is no ripe old age. You could be 100 years old. Age is just a number. I always tell you when my daughter Tamar was a little girl I'd put her to bed and I'd tell her what time she has to go to bed because of how old she is, she'd say, Abba, age is just a number. Age is just a number. Why do I have to go to bed earlier than you? Age is just a number. I don't know where she got that from and it didn't work. And things haven't changed. She's going to be a killer lawyer one day. Age is just a number. So there is no old. But there are people who are old even when they're young. You know we say, we missed a couple weeks, I'm just jamming it all in here today, just a free flow of, thank you for, it's a miracle you show up, but thank you for coming to my free therapy session. So we say on Selichos, we say in the Yamim Noraim time, אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה. Don't discard me in old age. The simple understanding is אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה is Hashem, when I reach a ripe old age, don't cast me away, don't consider me done, don't give up on me. But the Tzitz Eliezer, Rav Eliezer Waldenberg, has a commentary and he says אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה doesn't mean chronologically your age. Because you could be 18 years old and you're still saying that sentence. You could be nine years old, you stand next to your Abba in shul during Selichos, אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה, on Yom Kippur you're still saying don't cast me away. So it's not talking about a number chronologically. So what does it mean, don't cast me away l'eis zikna? What it means is don't let me ever have the mentality that I'm old and I'm done and I'm finished, that I can't change and I can't grow and I can't have drive and I can't have ambition and I can't have goals. Don't ever let me be finished. Don't ever let me be done. We have to always, always have ambition. What's his name, the great author who died a couple years ago? He published his last book at 100 years old, or 101 years old. What's his name? He went... great Jewish author died a few years ago. It's going to come to somebody here. He was 100 years old. אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה. Herman Wouk. Herman Wouk published his last book at 100 years old. He was 99 sitting at a typewriter or a keyboard or something. Yeah, I'm sure he took some shluf breaks on it, but he was 99, he was 100 years old when he was still reviewing the edits of his publisher. 100 years old. אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה. Don't let me be 18 years old and feel like 100. Don't ever let me feel I'm done, I'm old, I've arrived, I'm finished, I can't grow, I can't change. A person has to have she'ifos. That's what Rav Itchamayer is telling us. You have to have goals and dreams and ambitions, not only in the physical world where we all have that, we want to earn more money, we want our money to make money, we want our assets and portfolio to grow, we want to lose weight, we want to improve our appearance. our children. We want to, we have dreams and goals and ambitions and aspirations in other areas of life, want a nicer car and the newest phone. We want to finally learn technology. We want whatever dreams or ambitions that we have. But what about in the world of ruchiyus? What about in the spiritual world? Rav Yaakov Kamenetsky used to tell a mashal. Rav Yaakov Kamenetsky would say, can you imagine a little boy at his upsherin? Not everybody has an upsherin, upsherin's a minhag, it's not a halacha, but a little boy turns three and you cut his hair and you buy him a little pair of tzitzis, it says yeled tov. And the tzitzis are a little big on him, he's three years old, they're a little big. It says yeled tov, good boy, it's got little trains or balloons or whatever it's got on it, clowns, little Torah, yeled tov. And the boy wears and you cut his hair and he licks the honey off the Hebrew alphabet and he's so excited to start learning Torah. Yeled tov. Now imagine this boy turns bar mitzvah. So he puts on his tzitzis from his upsherin. And this little bar mitzvah boy is wearing tzitzis that say yeled tov. And now they only come up to his pupik. The tzitzis come up to his belly button. They're small on him because they were for a little three year old. Now imagine this little three year old is ready to get married. He walks down the aisle to his chuppah and he's standing under his chuppah and he's wearing his yeled tov tzitzis. And they say yeled tov and now they come up to here on him and it looks like an idiot, he looks ridiculous. The tzitzis from when he was three, he wore when he was thirteen, tzitzis from when he was three he's wearing when he's twenty whatever, standing under a chuppah getting married. They're small on him, they don't fit, they still say yeled tov. He looks ridiculous. Says Rav Yaakov Kamenetsky, that's not only true for the mitzvah of tzitzis. How many of us are davening the same way at three and at thirteen and at thirty and at eighty? Our understanding of shemonah esrei hasn't grown, it hasn't changed, our kavanah hasn't improved. Our knowledge of the parsha is the same from when we were in Hebrew school to high school to adulthood to old age. We have the same basic knowledge of the parsha. We've never dived, we've never delved deeper into it. It's not only true for the mitzvah of tzitzis that it doesn't fit and it looks ridiculous when you're wearing what you had at three when you're older. But the same is true with every mitzvah of life. Tzedakah. You haven't become a more sophisticated philanthropist? Your idea of tzedakah is still putting a dollar in the pushka? You're not thinking about where you want to give and what difference you want to make and how much you're giving and how you divide it and how you're proactive not only in responding but choosing where you give it. Your understanding of chesed hasn't grown. She'ifos. A Jew has to have drive. A Jew has to have goals. A Jew has to have ambition. A Jew has to pursue them and make resolutions to achieve them. We have to grow in our mitzvos, in our understanding. We can't live that same year over and over and over again. So עובדי השם יש להם שאיפות גדולות. You know what the difference is between a genuine true eved Hashem and someone who's just going through the motions and putting a check next to mitzvos? Do you have she'ifos? Do you sit around your dining room table with your family and talk about how are we going to grow? How are we going to improve? How are we going to change? What should we work on chevra? Let's not gossip as much. Let's let's give more time to showing kindness to others. Let's be more patient. Let's not grow angry with one another. Let's not talk about judgment. Let's love other Jews. Let's work on our ahavas Hashem. Let's work on our davening. I'll give a lesheim shamayim plug. We're almost up to in siddur snippets the Amidah. We're almost up to shemonah esrei. We're going to do a new campaign. Almost up to four hundred siddur snippets. We're almost up to the Amidah. Which is a great place if you haven't been listening to siddur snippets to start. Six minutes a day. We say the shemonah esrei three times a day, three hundred sixty-five days a year, our entire life. Just do the math, thousands and thousands and thousands of times. You're going to still know the bracha hashiva shofteinu from when you were eight years old? That's your understanding? You still not going to be able to translate the words of velamalshinim? You still not going to really appreciate what bareich aleinu is telling us? If we're going to say it thousands of times, let's understand it, let's tap into it, let's be elevated and transformed by it. Let's grow. As we get older, let the mitzvos grow with us. Have she'ifos. Have drive, have goals. Want to finish Tanakh, I want to finish Shas. I want to be learning every day. Whatever area of life. Between us and God, between us and people, between us and ourselves. Let's make goals and let's pursue them. Let's communicate them to the people around us. Let's let them be our accountability partners. Let's study how to form good habits so that we can achieve our goals. She'ifos, she'ifos, he writes in the footnote. שאיפות הן דבר טוב אלא שהן צריכות להיות במידה נכונה. Dreams and ambitions are good but they have to be the proper measure. Right? If I say today, I'm going to finish Shas and Tanakh and Mishna by tomorrow, I'll never speak another word of lashon hara again, I'm never eating a Cape Cod potato chip the rest of my life, bli neder. If you have unrealistic dreams and goals, ambitions, they're dead from the start. They're you have no shot, you have no chance. והיצר הרע משתדל להכניס האדם לריבוי שאיפות. So you know what the yetzer hara does? yetzer hara tells you, oh, I'm sitting in a great emuna class. He's pent up all this energy, two weeks he hasn't spoken to us, on fire. I'm walking out of here, I got dreams, I've got goals, I'm going to light my family on fire, I'm going to hold everybody accountable, I'm going to change everything. By mincha you won't even remember you went to the class. By the time you celebrate Lag Ba'omer tonight, by the time we light the fire, you won't even remember what's a goal, what's a dream, what's an ambition. What was that story with the tzitzis? The yetzer hara works. The moment you're in growth mode, the moment you're in growth mode, the yetzer hara says, what do I do? They're in growth mode. They're setting goals, they're in growth mode, I'm in trouble because the yetzer hara is in the opposite of growth mode. So what does the yetzer hara do? You're in growth mode, yetzer hara says the only way to get him, get her, she's in growth mode, I'm going to have her set dreams of growth that she'll never achieve and then she'll implode and face plant and fail, and that's how I'll stop this entire thing. That's how the yetzer hara works. We get into growth mode and then we set goals and dreams that are simply impossible to achieve. לשאוף לדברים שעדיין אינו יכול לעמוד בהם ואז מפילו אל העצבות על שלא הצליח. And then what happens? Not only do we not achieve our goal, you know what happens? Now, now we get sad and depressed. It's not that we go back to neutral the way we were. When we set goals and we failed, now we get all depressed and down on ourselves. Insecure, low self-esteem, low self-worth, I'm a nothing, I'm a nobody, I can't achieve anything. Look how many things I said I would do. You have to be realistic. I happen to be living with a group of people who are shedding for the wedding. I happen to be living with a group of people who are setting all... you have to set realistic goals. If you don't achieve them... that's why I'm not participating. I refuse to participate, I don't want to fail, so I just won't... no, but you have to have, in every area of life, in every arena of life, person has to have realistic goals. They must be realistic. והאריך בזה בסיעתא דשמיא בשער ב' במאמר איך לעורר חשק ושאיפות. He has an entire other chapter, maybe we'll learn this next, how to set realistic goals. What is ambitions and dreams? How do we grow? How do we grow? How do we have sheifot? What does it mean to be an eved Hashem? To be an eved Hashem is to grow, to be an eved Hashem is to never be stagnant. You know the Navi Yechezkel describes the malachim are omdim. Angels stand still. What it means to stand still is to be done, to be complete, to have arrived, to be finished. But human beings, we're not omdim, we don't stand still, you know what we are? We're mahalchim. We're on the move, we're on the go, we're putting one foot in front of another, we're advancing, we're progressing, we're growing. What is the entire framework of Jewish life and living called? What is the guide to how to get dressed and how to eat and how to speak and what to do? All Jewish law is called halacha. halacha is halicha, to be holech. It is accompanying us on our journey through life. Here's how you walk through life. Here's the guide of how to walk through life and to grow and to progress and to advance and to elevate. We're going higher and higher. We're elevating further and further. We're growing more and more. That is our mission, that is our mandate, that is where we are going, that is what we are all about. A Yid, a Jew, has to have sheifot, you have to have dreams. אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה, never let me feel like I’m old and I’m done. Let me continue at a hundred years old to publish and set dreams. You know, there have been octogenarians who set learning goals that will take 10 or 20 years. Because that's the dream. You're not done. You don't say, you know, who was it, Rabbi Wein, someone once wrote a book about in old age, what's it called? Don't buy green bananas. Something like that. Don't buy green bananas, buy green bananas, don't buy green bananas, buy them again. You should buy green bananas because you should believe you should be here when they'll turn yellow. Okay, something like that. I keep coming close and then you help me. It's a partnership, it's a partnership. So אל תשליכנו לעת זקנה, don't ever feel your zaken in this sense. Don't ever feel you're old and you've arrived. You gotta be hungry. You gotta be hungry. You gotta be hungry to grow. והוא אומר להם תראה כמה חסר לך, כמה אתה רחוק מהשלמות בכמות ואיכות. So how does the yetzer hara work? It says, you're not succeeding in your dreams and your goals and your ambitions, so you're a failure. You're a failure in quantity, you're a failure in quality. Look what you're missing. All you are is a failure. You pledged you were going to lose X number of weight and you came close but you didn't get there. So the yetzer hara doesn't say, but look how far you came. The yetzer hara says look. Look how far you have to go. Yetzer hara doesn't say look what you've achieved. Yetzer hara says look where you came up short. לא הצלחת כראוי וזה סימן שאין לך אפשרות להצליח. You see, you're a failure, you're an oysvarf, you're a nothing, you're a reject. You'll never break through, you'll never grow, you'll never be that person. You can't do it. ובזה הוא רוצה להחליש את דעתם. It wants to weaken us. It wants to break our drive. It wants to extinguish our appetite. It wants to make us believe we can't. And we have to overcome. The yetzer hatov says you can and you will, that you've got this. Go kill it. Go kill it in the world of ruchnius. אבל האמת היא בדיוק להפך כי צריך להעריך כל הצלחה הכי קטנה. The answer and the antidote says Rav Itche Meir is the exact opposite mentality. And the exact opposite mentality is to celebrate every small victory. You make a little party for every pound that you lost. You don't say, well, I was supposed to lose 20 pounds and I lost 17. I'm a failure, I'm a reject, I'm a nothing, I can never do it, I'm a nothing. You say, I'm going to make a party for every pound I lost. 17 candles, 17 part—not a cake, I guess, or you go down to 15 pounds. Put candles on your kale. And you make a party. Person has to have the capacity to celebrate the small victories. Celebrate the small victories. To pause. You know we don't do that. Sometimes our drive is in overdrive. Sometimes we're so ambitious and so hyper-competitive that we finish one thing and we go right to the next. What's the next project, what's the next program, what's the next committee, what's the next goal, what's the next thing I could immerse myself in? And we don't pause to celebrate. We don't pause to take pride. We don't pause to say, job well done. You could be proud of your effort, proud of that achievement, grateful to Hashem for enabling you to do it. But the yetzer hatov needs us to do that. In order to continue and not burn out, in order to continue and not fall on our face, a person needs to sometimes pause and celebrate. So the secret to happiness, to simcha, is to feel and to mark and to celebrate success. And the opposite of simcha, the kryptonite or that which compromises our capacity for simcha, which makes us sad and depressed and feel inadequate and feel incapable and feel unworthy, is failure. So the yetzer hara tries to have us focus on failure. And the yetzer hatov has to make us pivot to focus on our success. להיות מלא שמחה על כל קצת שזכה בעבודת השם. Oh, Hashem, I said my shemonah esrei, it had 19 brachos. I can't believe I only had kavanah for one. For 18 were a big fail. So either the yetzer hara could say, you know what, tomorrow don't bother try to concentrate on any. Maybe don't even bother opening the siddur because if 18 out of 19 you didn't even concentrate, why bother? That's how the yetzer hara works. Yetzer hatov says, are you kidding me? I had kavanah for one. What a day. What a davening. What a success. And guess what? Tomorrow I'm going to take that one, I'm going to double it. I'm going to have a 100% improvement rate. I'm going to go up to two. Two out of 19. Every area of life. We make a pledge and a promise, I'm never losing my cool again. I'm never getting angry again, I'm never raising my voice again, not to my children, not to my spouse, I'm never getting angry again. When you're hangry, it's hard to fulfill that promise for the record. If you're if you're denying yourself, if you have unrealistic eating goals and you're hangry. You know what hangry is? Hungry and angry. It's when you think, I'm going to eat 100 calories a day. Then I could fit into anything. 100 calories a day. Nobody will want to be around you, I promise. So whatever you're wearing or fit into, you'll be all alone in this world. So if you're hangry. So you say, I'm never going to get angry, I'm never going to raise my voice, I'm never going to lose my cool again. It's an unrealistic, absurd goal. So what happens is the first time you lose your cool, and if you by the way make that pledge to the people around you, they will remind you the first time you lose your cool, then the next day you say, you know what, I guess I'm just not cut out. I'm just, you know, who I am. I'm a Kohen, I'm a Sefardi, I'm a Moroccan, I'm a everyone's got their I'm a redhead, I'm a everyone's got their explanation and their excuse why I'm passionate and I'm energized, enthusiastic, and I fly off the handle with rage. Everyone's got their explanation. You don't know my this is nothing if you knew my father, if you knew my it's nothing. Everybody's got their explanation, everybody's got their excuse. But if your goal is to never get angry again, the first time you get angry. angry, you're going to abandon the entire goal and then you're done. But if you say, you know, I made it most of the day, do you know that I did fly off the handle, but do you know how many other times I was tempted but I overcame and I stayed calm and I didn't react that way, I didn't give in to that voice? If we want to feel simcha and happiness, we have to focus and concentrate on our success and build off of it and grow on it and add to it and improve on it instead of being held back and undermined by the yetzer hara which is trying to force us to focus on our failures. ולא לחשוב על מה שחסר ועל מה שעוד לא זכה. Don't see what's left how far you didn't go and what's missing chosar hashleimus. I'm incomplete and my goal is incomplete and I'm not done yet. You know who had this challenge? Torah tells us I once suggested this, I don't know if it's true, was a novel suggestion, one of the few I've made. When Moshe Rabbeinu, Hakadosh Baruch Hu tells him, Sefer Devarim, climb on the mountain and look. I want you to give a look, look east and west and north and south. Look into Eretz Yisrael. You can't go in, but you can give a kuk, you can look, look, look inside but you can't go. First of all it sounds cruel by God. I know this is your lifelong dream, I know it's what you dedicated your entire career towards, I know you sacrificed your family for it, but nanana kish kish you can't go in you could just look. It seems a little bit cruel. Why is Hashem doing that? But moreover, why does Hashem say look behind you? I understand look in front of you. That's the land of Israel. Look in front, look north, look south, look at the entire width and breath of the land of Israel that you cherish, that you love, that you value, that you can't go into but you could look as if you are in, virtual reality, as if you are in. But why does Hashem say turn around? And I think perhaps what Hashem was telling Moshe was, Moshe, look in front of you. And it's true, you're not going to make it to the promised land. You're not making it to the end of the marathon. You're not making it to the finish line. It's true, for whatever reason that's not meant to be. But lest you think that therefore your life is a failure, lest you feel incomplete, lest you feel less than, turn around. I want you to look how far you've come. I want you to see where you started and how far you've led this people. Don't only focus on what's left and where to go, focused on where you began and how far you've come. That's the secret to happiness and that's the secret of maintaining drive and ambition, to celebrate success, to stop and to pause with pride in what we've achieved and accomplished and how far we've come. To not feel incomplete אלא רק לשמוח ולהודות להשם יתברך על כל דבר ודבר שכן זכה. To be happy and grateful to Hashem for every merit, for every achievement, for everything we've done כי בכל דבר הכי קטן כבר זכה להידבק בחי החיים שזה תכלית הכל. Bless you. You made a bracha, you made your shehakol, you caffeinated with kavana, let's make we'll see our cups. You caffeinated with kavana this morning. So tonight when you fall asleep you could say, oh my goodness, because of the shiur I made a shehakol, I made a bracha on the first cup, I didn't concentrate on one other bracha the whole day. I didn't even make one other bracha the whole day. You could go to sleep and feel like a failure, a nebach, a nothing, an oisvorf, a reject, and what are the chances you're going to try again tomorrow? Or you could say, you know what, that one bracha, do you know it influenced the whole cosmos? Do you know what that one bracha did for my soul? Do you know in that one moment how closely connected I felt to Hashem? Shehakol nihiya bidvaro. The great insight that we've shared shehakol, what do you mean everything? It's just a cup of coffee. The answer is it's not the cup of coffee. It's the cup of coffee, it's the room, it's the air conditioning, it's the lights, it's the friends, it's the faculties, the fact that I'm alive and well shehakol, it's the ambiance, it's not just I can smell it, I can taste it, we've come to learn over the last two years that's not a given. Who ever felt blessed in their life because they could smell and taste? Who in their life ever thanked Hashem every day? I don't know about you, every motzei Shabbos havdalah I make the bracha borei minei besamim. Oh, thank God, still smell. I'm good, I have yet, I don't even want to say it, I'm not going to say it. I won't say it. But if you still smell, you still taste, count your blessings. It's not a kleine zach, it's not a small thing. If you smell and you taste our whole lives we thought, ah, that's a given. I don't have to thank anyone for that. Smelling and tasting if I woke up this morning I'm going to smell and taste big deal. It's not a small thing you smell and taste. Smell and taste shehakol, I can smell the coffee. Shehakol, I can taste the coffee. Shehakol, I'm enjoying the coffee with you. Shehakol, I'm living a time there's air conditioning and lights. Shehakol, I can stream a shiur. Shehakol, I have a sefer of Avi Ezer Meir. So don't go to sleep and say I made one bracha with kavanah and then the rest of the day I was a failure and a flop. It was terrible. No, that one bracha, I changed the world. I changed my world. I paused and I was present and I was connected in ways that transformed me. I'm a new person after I made that bracha than I was before. So that bracha was the greatest thing I ever did. And tomorrow I'm going to remember to do it more often. And the day after that I'm going to add more and more. And ultimately I'm going to grow and it'll be incredible what you'll see and how changed I'll be. ואף שבוודאי צריך לשאוף, we'll just do a little bit more. V'af shebevadai, we have to make up for lost time. ואף שבוודאי צריך לשאוף בכלות הנפש ולרצוא ולהזעקות לכל המדרגות, and even though of course to be a Jew, to be alive means to have ambition and drive and to grow. There are people lying in hospital beds whose entire drive and ambition is when they blow into that little thing where their ball goes up, that they can make it go a little bit higher and higher. But that's drive, that's ambition. And when they can blow successfully into it and the ball goes a little bit higher, they should say, "Yay me! Let's make a party!" It's a success. It doesn't matter what age, it doesn't matter what state, doesn't matter what stage of life. It doesn't matter your status. You have to have sheifos, you have to have drive. I'm going to pass the swallow test, I'm going to blow into the thing and make the ball go a little bit higher. I'm going to take three steps down the hallway, three more steps than I took yesterday, three steps without the walker. Whatever area, whatever stage, whatever point of life, a person has to have sheifos, you have to have drive. You can't just feel, "I'm wearing the same tzitzis, yeled tov." I look ridiculous in them, but I'm stuck. This is who I am. This is my personality, this is my persona, this is how I daven, these are my midos, these are my... you have to have sheifos. A person has to have sheifos, you have to have drive and hunger and appetite and ambition lechol chelkei haTorah, to grow in every way and every direction we can. ולהידבק בו יתברך בכל הגוונים העמוקים. I want to connect to Hashem in every way. I want to grow in every way. I want to understand the cosmos. I want to understand the sky and the stars and the constellations. I want to be able to name the leaves and the fauna and the landscape. I want to appreciate the animals and the birds. I want to study every area of His Torah. I want to become a more giving and generous and selfless and magnanimous person. Every area I want to improve and I want to grow, physical, spiritual, emotional health. מכל מקום מצד שני צריך להיות מלא שמחה והודאה. But if the ambition and the drive and the competitiveness rob you of your serenity and tranquility and happiness, then they are inauthentic, they're counterfeit. Then they're fake and then they're not healthy. הכל מדרגה והכל אות בתורה שזכה. A person has to be malei simcha. I made one bracha with kavanah, let's make a party. Took three steps, let's make a party. I learned one line of Gemara, let's make a party. Whatever we do, we have to mark with pride the accomplishment and then we'll feel the drive to go further and further. ומי שמחפש רק שלמות וחושב שבלי זה אין לו על מה להודות לשמוח, if you're so hyper and uber competitive that unless you did everything perfectly and unless you achieved the complete goal you can't be happy, זו טעות גדולה ומסוכנת. This is a dangerous and catastrophic mistake שרבים בחללים הפילה רחמנא ליצלן, that countless people have fallen and stumbled, have sabotaged their own success by being hyper competitive and ambitious, by having unmitigated drive and appetite and unwilling to be happy with anything less than perfection. אלא צריך לשמוח בכל הצלחה, you have to be happy with every success, afilu ketana, to measure the small, small steps. ודווקא השמחה הזו היא פתח להשגה יותר גבוהה. What is he getting at? We'll end with this point which we should have begun with because this is the key point of the whole thing. To be an eved Hashem, to be able to grow, you have to be happy. Sad people don't grow. Sad people don't grow. Sad people don't connect to Hashem. Sad people struggle with faith. Sad, down, depressed, despondent people don't make progress and grow and advance and they don't fulfill a mission in this world. They're not serving Hashem. A person has to be besimcha. You have to have a joy and a zest for life. You have to be able to feel a happiness and an energy and an enthusiasm. The driver of life, the that which powers it is... Through life is that sense of simcha. That sense of simcha. So what will promote and reinforce the sense of simcha? When we celebrate our success. And what will undermine and compromise that sense of simcha? When we focus on our failure. When we knock ourselves down. העצב הוא פתח לנפילות. Pain is the predicate to failure. So a person has to feel simcha. If you're sad, you're going to sabotage your own success. And if you're happy, you could do anything in the world. You could do anything in the world. So simcha, that's what we're studying. The simcha that comes from emuna. Hakadosh Baruch Hu, I know you're with me. And I know that you're proud of me for every success I have. And I know that you will help me add and grow it to do more and advance it the next day and tomorrow. And when we do, together we can elevate to grow higher and higher. The sky is the limit. Until next time, stay happy, stay healthy, and stay holy.
