Transcript
Boker tov and good morning, and welcome back to another installment of Living with Emuna. We come together on Wednesday mornings to learn about, study about, and most importantly to try to reinforce our living emuna, to feel Hashem's presence in our life, to lean on Him and rely on Him and turn to Him and confide in Him, to be grateful to Him, to protest and object to Him, but to know that we are not alone, we are never alone, we're not at it alone, there is no such thing as bidud, there is no such thing as being quarantined alone, we are always together with Hashem. He is always and forever in our lives. I want to thank our generous sponsors of the series for the year, Doctors Avi and Bella Morgan in memory of Rabbi Doctor Brian Gabet, ברוך צבי בן ראובן נתן, and in memory of Bella's mother Doctor Ellen Chanzer, who lived a great life of service to the Jewish community and of doing chesed, and we thank them for their incredible generosity. I want to learn a piece with you today that comes from our good friend *Rav Itamar Schwartz*, the author of the Bilvavi Mishkan Evneh, a prolific speaker and writer in Eretz Yisroel today, and many of his shiurim can be found online. If you look in the chat on the Zoom, I know there are people watching across several mediums and platforms right now, but if you look on the Zoom I posted the link to the source we're going to look at and study together, and if anybody wants to, if you're not on the chat, I'm happy to send it to you privately offline. And *Rav Itamar Schwartz* is dealing with the following question, the author of the Bilvavi is dealing with the following question. This Motzei Shabbos we will begin to recite Selichos. We'll begin to recite Selichos, and with it we're going to say a sentence, אל תשליכני מלפניך ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממני. Don't cast me away from before you, al tashlicheni Hashem, whatever you do, don't give up on me, don't throw me away, don't discard me, don't walk away from me. I'm not incorrigible, I'm not irredeemable, I'm not a failure and underachiever, I haven't given up on myself, Hashem, we stand in Selichos and we plead, al tashlicheni, don't give up on me, don't cast me away. Veruach kodshecha, and the veruach kodshecha, your divine spirit, al tikach mimeni. Don't take it away from me, don't take it away from me. I live to be in your presence, I live to feel your divine spirit, and so don't cast me away and give up on me, I'm not irredeemable, and ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממני, and don't take away your Ruach Hakodesh. And the Bilvavi is bothered, and will address in a moment what you have in front of you if you're following along is only a part of the greater shiur, let me give a little bit of a background to his question. He's bothered by really a compelling question and I must confess and admit, I'm embarrassed to admit, that I never really thought about this until this year. Said this sentence for more years than I'd like to tell you, but I've never really thought about what this sentence really means. Al tashlicheni milfanecha, that's easy to have. Don't cast me away, don't throw me away, don't give up on me, don't throw me out, I got it. ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממני. Don't take the Ruach Hakodesh away from me. Let me ask you a simple question, my friends. Did I think I had Ruach Hakodesh? Do I think I had divine inspiration? If I did I would pick the lottery numbers and know who would win the Super Bowl and who's going to win the election. Ruach Hakodesh, do I think that I have nevua, prophecy? I have divine insight? I can tell you what's happening in the world? Do I think I have Ruach Hakodesh to the extent that I have to beg and plead from Hashem, veruach kodshecha, and the Ruach Hakodesh, your spirit that rests on me, al tikach, don't take it away from me? So a simple understanding would be yeah, maybe, maybe this sentence is written for the most righteous among us, maybe it's written for the greatest among us who taka have Ruach Hakodesh. We just studied a little while ago, Wednesday mornings before the shiur we have a shiur in Mesillas Yesharim. We're up to the 97th, 98th shiur of Mesillas Yesharim, and we're up to the 11th chapter, and it's a guide, a 12-step program, Mesillas Yesharim the Ramchal based on רב פנחס בן יאיר. The Talmud records that רב פנחס בן יאיר, one of the most righteous of our sages, offered a 12-step program for how to achieve human perfection. And he said one leads to the next, we have to grow in those areas, conquer those qualities, and the end result is living our best lives. The end result is being shalem, being holy, being complete, being reaching our potential of who we're meant to be. We began, Mesillas Yesharim begins, Zehirus. Consciousness, mindfulness, caution. Don't just live life recklessly, but look and think what will be the impact of what I want to say, what will be the impact of what I'm about to do? To be thoughtful in every behavior, speech, and action. That's number one. Number two is Zerizus, alacrity, zeal, enthusiasm. Don't walk around lethargic, don't procrastinate, don't push off. Be excited, have enthusiasm, set goals, make resolutions, go pursue them and go achieve them. And the third is Nekius, which is the quality that we're up to in our study on Wednesday mornings. But if you follow all the way through beyond these three, all the way through twelve, and you get to the end of Mesillas Yesharim, you make it to the end of the Ramchal's magnum opus. his wonderful sefer Mesilas Yesharim. It ends with a promise of ruach hakodesh. ruach hakodesh. If you master mindfulness, and then you master zeal, and then you master nekiyus, you cleanse yourself, you purge negative qualities and behaviors and tendencies and distractions, and then you go on and on and on for the rest of the qualities, it ends with ruach hakodesh. You qualify for divine inspiration. Hashem will speak to you, Hashem will speak to you. So the simple understanding of this sentence that we're going to start saying on Selichos night and that really characterizes much of Elul and the Yamim Noraim period. Al tashlicheini milifanecha, Hashem, don't cast me away, don't throw me away, don't give up on me. Don't give up on me. Don't give up on me. Don't give up on me. Don't give up on me. ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממני and don't take away the ruach hakodesh. So maybe this was written, maybe it was designed for the person who's completed Mesilas Yesharim, they finished the formula of רבי פנחס בן יאיר, they have ruach hakodesh and they're asking Hashem, 'You know that ruach hakodesh that I achieved, that I earned, that you've granted, please don't take it away.' But that's very hard to accept or believe because that's very few if any among us who actually earn that level. So do we really recite in our liturgy a sentence that was only designated for the very few? Very hard to accept, very hard to understand. I think clearly, and the Bilvavi thinks clearly this has a much broader and more universal appeal, it's speaking to a much wider audience, it's speaking to every one of us. Hashem, don't throw me away. I know that I underachieved this year. I know that I've mailed it in, I know that I've gotten away with the minimum, I know that I'm not who I meant to be, I'm not who you believe I could be, I know that I'm not living the life I meant to live, but don't throw me away, don't give up on me, don't cast me to the side, don't give up on me. This is going to be my year. I want it, I crave it, I can picture it and I'm going to create it. And if you believe in me, I believe in myself. That's the first half. But what is ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממני? Don't take away ruach kodshecha. Don't take away ruach kodshecha. So he explains the following: It's written, 'A pure heart you created me with, a proper spirit you prepared within me.' A pure heart. לב טהור ברא לי אלקים... veruach kodshecha... Hakadosh Baruch Hu, you created me with a pure heart. לב טהור ברא לי אלקים. Every person has a ruach. We all have a ruach inside us. What does it mean that we have a ruach inside us? Is this, we've got ruach, yes we do, we've got ruach, how about you? Who could sing the loudest and clap the loudest and who can make the chadar ochel come alive? What does it mean that we all have ruach? We all have the ability to lead the kumzits, to stand on the table and cheer the zmiros and win the color war? What's the ruach that every one of us has inside us? So the Vilna Gaon, the Gra, Rav Eliyahu Kramer of Vilna explains: You know what the ruach Hashem put inside of us is? The ruach is the spirit inside us. And the spirit manifests itself in our ability to have free will. The power of bechirah. The power of choice. The power of not being predetermined or predestined, the power of not having to assume a certain result, the power of the ability to live in the moment and to look at our lives and to make choices, to make choices. But the Gemara says that every day the yetzer hara gets stronger and stronger and so I want to make the right choice for what breakfast to eat and what lunch to eat and what dinner to eat and what snacks to avoid. I want to make the right choice. But the yetzer hara gets stronger and stronger. I'm hungry and I'm tired and those snacks look so good. I want to make the right choice and guard my tongue and not offer the gossip or slander and not say those things. You know, the Pope got in trouble this week. I don't know if you saw the headline. The Pope got in trouble because he said, and I quote, 'Gossip is a greater plague than COVID-19.' That was the Pope giving mussar to the whole world. The Pope, he got in trouble, how could you compare anything to COVID-19 and gossip and, okay, I'm not here to defend the Pope, I'm not here to quote the Pope, but the Pope told the whole world, he gave good mussar to the whole world and he said, 'Gossip is a greater plague, a mageifah, worse than COVID-19.' Psh. That's the Pope's observation. So the yetzer hara grows, I have a ruach, I have the capacity to guard my tongue, I have the capacity to stay quiet and hold it back, but the yetzer hara, it's such a juicy currency to share that latest gossip and slander about somebody else. And every example of a yetzer hara, we're not going to take the time, but I have bechirah. The ruach inside me is to do the right thing, say the right thing, look at the right thing, go to the right place, make the right choice. I could sleep in and not daven, I could wake up and daven with kavanah. I could skip the berachah, I could say a berachah and appreciate and thank God for the food that He's given me to eat. I could be cruel or unkind or mean to another person or I could have self-control and not be envious or arrogant or angry, just be kind and do chesed. The ruach He placed inside us, says the Gaon, that ruach inside us is the capacity, is the power of bechirah, of choice, of free will. But there's a battle, there's a fight that's taking place. place between the yetzer hara that urge, that inclination, that instinct that just wants to feed that appetite, that temptation, and the ruach, the power of the bechira that tells me to do the right thing. So which is going to win? This is what the Bilvavi says. This is what the Bilvavi says. I'm not sure if this part's from the Gra or it's his own. But he says, you know, the ruach on its own can't defeat the yetzer hara. So potent, so powerful, so persuasive is that yetzer hara, it will take us down. It's just so exciting to share the gossip. And that bag of Trader Joe's corn chips is just so enticing. And to look at that thing on the internet and to go to that place and to sleep in and to mumble that Asher Yatzar. It's all so easy and it's all so enticing. The yetzer hara's going to win. It's going to defeat me. The ruach on its own can't do it. So how do I get my ruach to be able to persevere, to triumph, to win? How do I live my best, most disciplined life? How do I reach for the stars and how do I become who I'm meant to be? That ruach needs help. That ruach needs help. And how does that ruach get help? The ruach get help by returning to its root. Where did the ruach come from? Where do we have our ruach from? That koach habechira, the power of free will, the capacity to be disciplined and dignified, the ability to choose how I want to respond and who I want to be. The article I wrote last week was all about much of the frustration and the emotions tied to how people are behaving around us with COVID. Those who are more extreme and those who are more lenient and are intolerance of both. We want and we need everyone to approach it exactly the way we do. And it's so frustrating and it brings out such an emotional reaction from us. And what I wrote about are the things that we can't control. We are in a world where it seems and it feels there is more and more we are powerless over. There is less and less we can control. We want this to end. Who wants to wear this fakakta mask and send our children to school with a mask? Who wants to be far away from people and not be able to hug a friend? Who wants to not be able to share a Yom Tov meal? We're living in a crazy time and we're powerless. But with all the things that we can't control, what we can control is ourselves. Bechira. We have that power. We have that free will. We have that capacity. We have that competence. We have that ability to control ourselves. We can't control the people around us and what they say and how they behave and the choices they make, but we can control how they make us feel. We can control how we react. We have that koach habechira and who put it inside us? You see, the animal doesn't. And the animal part of us doesn't. There's an animal impulse and an animal inclination and an animal intuition and an animal instinct, and that animal has an appetite. The animal's hungry, it eats. It doesn't say, 'Did I pay for this? Is it mine? Is now a good time? Will it make me fat? Will I still fit into these jeans?' The animal doesn't think about those things. The animal doesn't have that self-awareness. The animal has an appetite for food or for any type of pleasure, and the animal simply indulges that appetite anywhere, anytime, with anyone. But the human being says, 'Yes, I have that appetite and yes, I have that temptation to indulge it, but you know what? I have a power of bechira. I have the koach to overcome it. I have the ability to triumph.' Where did we get that from? We got it from when Hashem breathed life into us. Hashem put that ruach. He took a deep breath within himself and ויפח באפיו נשמת חיים. Like the glassblower who fills the glass and makes it expand with his own breath, like the person who blows up the balloon who fills the balloon with their own breath, Hashem filled up our lungs. He made us living, animated beings. He brought us to life with his own breath. There's a piece of God in every one of us and that's what gives us our self-control, our discipline, our dignity. That's what makes us reach for the stars. That's what makes us believe in ourselves and who we can become. That is the ruach inside us. I've said this in many contexts, I apologize if I said it here in the Emuna Shiur, but the Sfas Emes says that's why we blow the shofar. On the day that we coronate God as the King, I could tell you as a baal tokeia myself, you know where you get the breath to blow the shofar? If you blow the shofar from your voice box superficially, you will fail. You have to take a deep breath and produce the sound from the breath that comes from deep inside your belly. We are drawing from the very breath that God first put in us. The sound of the shofar is the affirmation, Hashem, the breath you put in me, the breath you believed in me, the breath that you told me I'm capable and competent to be disciplined and to have free will and to make choices and to mold and shape and craft the life that I want and that you meant for me, that breath, it's still there. The blowing of the shofar, the sound of the shofar is the affirmation, that original breath you put in me, it's still there. Listen to that sound, Hashem. I'm producing it now and it's still there. So I have a ruach. I have Hashem in me. I have Hashem in me. But you know, I can only defeat that yetzer hara. I'll only win that instinct, that impulse. It's so strong, it's so powerful, it's so enticing, it's so overwhelming. I can only win, I will only defeat it when I invoke my ruach, my free will, but Not just the free will within me, when I return my free will to the creator from which we came. So let's read inside a little bit. Again you have it in the chat if you're on the Zoom, if you're on Facebook or YouTube, I'm happy to send it to you if you're in touch with me, or you could find it on the bilvavi.net, b-i-l-v-a-v-i.net. Rav Itamar Schwartz, the Bilvavi, he has countless shiurim up there, they're all so beautiful. העיקר החטא שעליו אנחנו צריכים לבקש מחילה כל אחד לפי ערכו. The core cheit, the core mistake, the core indiscretion, the core violation for which we need to ask forgiveness, each person according to their level, their background, their baggage, to the level in which they made the mistake, הוא שבשעה שכל אדם עומד בניסיון הרבה פעמים הוא עומד בניסיון הזה לבד ולא יחד עם ריבונו של עולם. The answer is, you know what we're asking mechila for? You know what we're begging forgiveness for? This is going to change your entire Rosh Hashanah Yom Kippur. When I just saw this and read this, it's life-changing. It's an entirely different perspective. I hope I'm not over-selling right now, over-promising, but I'm telling you, such a powerful insight. He says, you know what the core mechila that we're asking for is? Hashem, I apologize that I tried to go at it alone. I thought I could conquer the corn chips, or the lashon hara, or the internet. I thought I could conquer the urge to sleep in, I thought I could conquer that temptation, that distraction, that yetzer hara. I tried to go at it alone. I thought I had what it takes, I thought I was powerful, I thought it was in me, I thought I could do it. I tried to do it alone. ולא יחד עם ריבונו של עולם. I forgot to invite you. I forgot to turn to you. I forgot to partner with you. I forgot to invoke you in my fight, in my battle, in my conflict. ואם הוא נמצא שם לבד הוא בהכרח לא יצליח. But you know, if you're trying to do it alone, you'll never win. Whatever area of your life that you're trying to conquer, you're not going to win. You're not going to win. The only way to win is to partner with our better self, and our better self is our Godly self. To invoke that Godliness, that koach habechira, that spirit of free will, the spirit of God, the tzelem Elokim that's inside us. Al tashlicheini milfanecha, על מה זה עיקר הבקשה בשעה שיש לאדם ניסיון אם הקדוש ברוך הוא ישליך אותו באותו רגע יצרו של אדם מתגבר עליו הוא לא יצליח. And that's what we're davening for, says the Bilvavi. Al tashlicheini milfanecha. Don't cast me away from before you when I'm standing opposite the cabinet looking at the tempting snacks, when I'm about to share the slander, the gossip, when I'm about to make the wrong choice and engage in the wrong behavior. Al tashlicheini milfanecha. Hashem, don't cast me away. Hashem, don't make me stand on my own. Don't make me confront this on my own. Don't make me think I can do it on my own. I can't. If all I am is an animal with an animal impulse and instinct, I've lost, I'm done, I'm finished. Be with me. Help me realize the Godly spirit, the tzelem Elokim in me. Be a presence with me. Let me feel your support. Let me feel your pushing my back. Let me feel your encouragement. Let me feel you're by my side, and then I can conquer anything. Whether a person's going for a medical treatment and has to overcome the harshness, chas v'shalom, of a treatment that they need, whether a person's overcoming fear, anxiety, worry, panic, whether a person's overcoming the impulse to do or say or go to or look at the wrong thing. Al tashlicheini milfanecha. Don't throw me aside and make me fight this on my own, because if I have to, then I've lost even before the battle has begun. ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממני. Al tashlicheini milfanecha וודאי שזה נאמר על כל חיי אדם בהאי עלמא. It's talking about in this world. Don't cast me aside, don't make me be wandering, don't make me be reaching and searching, don't make me feel lost and on my own. אבל בפרט על זמן שהאדם עומד בניסיון. But in the moment that we're being tempted and in the moment that we're trying to overcome the challenge, ואם הקדוש ברוך הוא ישליכהו באותו זמן הוא יפול. And if Hashem abandons us, or casts us away, or walks away in that moment, we are finished. It's over. Game over. ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממנו. אם אתה לא משליך אותנו מלפניך אז אתה נותן לנו את רוח קדשך תוקף פנימי לעמוד בניסיונות. So the Bilvavi is suggesting such a beautiful pshat. ורוח קדשך אל תקח ממני is not talking about the one who finished the twelve steps of Pinchas ben Yair. We're not talking about a person who has literal divine inspiration, Ruach Hakodesh. We're talking about every one of us, talking about you and me, that inside us is that ruach. There is that spirit, it's alive and it's well. If Hashem chooses not to withdraw from us, if he doesn't cast us aside or give up on us, if he believes... in us and believes in himself in us, manifest through us, then we're not alone, then we can defeat that yetzer hara, then we can realize who we're meant to be, then we can live the lives that we're meant to live. We don't have to fly off the handle and get angry and be filled with rage and lose our cool. We don't have to be envious and jealous of what the people around us have. We don't have to speak the things we're not supposed to speak or look at the things we're not supposed to look at or go the places we're not supposed to go. We can become our best selves and live our best lives. When? When al tashlicheni, when you don't cast me aside, and therefore ruach kodshecha, the ruach, the spirit of your kedusha, of your holiness that's inside me, that spirit that says, "Yes, I can. I can be all I'm meant to be, and that it's never too late to become the person I'm meant to become." We have that power. אבל מצד כך צריך שבשעה שיש לאדם ניסיון, however, there's a catch. There's a catch. You want to overcome the urge to sleep in? You want to wake up and greet the day with excitement and do the right thing? You want to overcome the urge to panic, to worry, to be filled with anxiety, to be jealous, to be angry, to fly off the handle, to overreact to somebody who's triggered you? You know how you do it? In those moments, al tashlicheni milfanecha, the way to achieve it is בפועל ממש השם יתברך ניצב עמו ומתלווה אליו נקודת הניסיון ואז הוא פונה אליו שיעזור לו בפועל. Hashem is with me in that moment, in that moment. So someone does something, they trigger someone, and it's easy to happen, particularly now during Corona. We're all living on the edge, we're all frustrated, we all have Corona fatigue, and it doesn't take much for the person to say or do or think the wrong thing, for us to fly off the handle. So how do we overcome that urge? We're just on the edge and our blood pressure starts to rise and our and our pulse starts to quicken and the sweat glands start to pump and I'm about to overreact, raise my voice, yell, say something that I'm going to regret. Omed benisayon, in that moment, we are facing a test. It's a test. It's a test. What do you do? You have to take a deep breath, כל הנשמה תהלל קה, renew the neshamah with the neshimah, renew the neshamah with the neshimah, renew the spirit with the breath and then say, "You know what? Hashem, you're with me right now. And you know how embarrassed and humiliated I'd be if I fly off the handle and yell in front of you?" The King of Kings, I'm about to yell and scream and fly off the handle in front of you. That's embarrassing, it's humiliating, it's shameful. But moreover, it's unproductive, it's counterproductive. You're right by my side. This is all happening for a reason and there's a better way to react. רוח קדשך אל תקח ממני. The spirit that says I don't have to yell, I don't have to scream, I don't have to get angry, I don't have to raise my voice, there's a better way to handle this. Al tikach mimeni, don't take away that belief that I have bechira, that I can choose. I'm not pre-programmed and it's not fatalistic and it's not predetermined and I don't have to become, I don't have to react in that way. I don't have to be that person. I can be disciplined, I can be dignified, I can be sovereign over myself, I can have self-control. That's all represented and reflected and manifest in the ruach hakodesh, the ruach kodshecha. I have your ruach in me. So yes, the animal part of me wants to fly off the handle. Yes, the animal part of me wants to stuff my face at midnight. Yes, the animal part of me wants to sleep in. Yes, the animal part of me wants to gossip. Yes, the animal part of me wants to be less than the best I could be. But רוח קדשך אל תקח ממני, there's a ruach, there's your spirit, it's inside me. Don't take it away. What a new and beautiful interpretation. What a strength it gives us to understand this sentence, to understand the sentence. That al tashlicheni, don't cast me aside, don't give up on me. God, I know I haven't reached out much lately, I know that I haven't been in touch a lot lately, I know that I haven't realized your dreams for me lately, I know that I haven't been the best I could be lately, but al tashlichenu milfanecha, do not give up on me, do not cast me aside. Please, I beg, I plead, another chance. And why? Why should God listen? Because רוח קדשך אל תקח ממני. As long as I have the ruach of kodshecha, as long as you're in me, and I'm not just an animal and I'm not pre-programmed and I'm not predetermined and I'm not fatalistic, as long as I still believe in the koach habechira, as long as I still have free will, as long as I still believe I can choose, it's within me. It's actually this week's parsha, החיים והמוות ובחרת בחיים, choose life. I can choose. I can choose. There are choices. I don't have to get angry. I don't have to get envious. I don't have to be anxious. I can choose. We're living in a powerless and a world that we can control so much less, and yet, the most important thing we can still control, the most important thing in our lives we still can control, and that is who we are and who we want to be, who we are and who we want to be, like Viktor Frankl writes, like Viktor Frankl describes, even in Auschwitz, even in the Holocaust, even under the Nazis. They could take away all of our external free will, enslave, oppress, persecute, but by choosing how we react and respond, by choosing how we define ourselves even within that, by invoking the Ruach Kadshicha that we still have a Godly soul and a Godly spirit and we still have a Ruach, then in man's search for meaning, even Viktor Frankl, Viktor Frankl even in that circumstance, Al Tashlicheini, don't cast me away even in that case. And certainly in our lives as difficult and challenging as this period in corona is, it's obviously far less and categorically different than the horror that Viktor Frankl and so many others went through. And if they could choose to still embrace and hold onto and sustain and maintain that Ruach, so can we. No matter how much fatigue we have, no matter how tired we've grown, that Ruach, don't cast me away, don't give up on me. Don't give up on me. I haven't given up on myself. As long as we have free will, and as long as we can make choices, we can still become and lead the lives we're meant to. בכל כוח שאדם פועל בכלל ובפרט בחלקי הבחירה צריך בחינה מדוקדקת בנפש מה האדם מרגיש. B'chol koach, in every, in every energy, in every act that a person realizes generally and specifically, but particularly when it comes to free will, tzarich bchina medukdeket. You need a very fine-tuned choice. בנפש מה האדם מרגיש אם הוא מרגיש שהוא פעל ומרגיש שהשם יתברך נתן בו את הכח מכח כך פועל. Person has to have a high degree of self-awareness. Are you so arrogant to think that you're in control, that you're in charge, that it's all up to you? Do you think that you're on autopilot and everything has been pre-programmed? Or do you realize that everything we are and everything we have is on loan from Hashem? Everything is on loan from Hashem, and it could disappear any moment, any moment. You know how for many weeks or months of the Emunah shiur I gave the example of lifting a cup of coffee successfully to our lips? And even though we have the confidence to believe that that's something that's on autopilot, nothing could go wrong until we drop it or spill it, our muscles don't react, the neurons don't control the coordination, it's too hot it spills. You know how I've given that example for several months? Well, yesterday I was drinking my cup of coffee as I was preparing the Parsha shiur and it slipped out of my hand and spilled all over my keyboard and my mouse and my Sfarim. It was fine. At first I started to react and I said, I've just given this example for like three months in the Emunah shiur. So, you know, the best part of giving the Emunah shiur is you have to live part of the Emunah. So, cleaned it up, dried it off, back to work, rolled with the punches, no big deal, meant to be from Hashem. And we appreciate that a simple maneuver, a simple gesture, lifting a cup of coffee to our lips, it's not in our power. Don't be overly confident. Don't think that it's easy until it disappears, until it goes wrong, do you realize that even that was never up to you? So you could have faith in the ability to lift a cup of coffee and you have faith in the pharmacist, and you have faith in the doctor, you have faith in the lawyer, and you have faith in, in Dr. Fauci, and you have faith in whoever you have faith in. We have faith in the people all around us and we follow their directive and their direction and we express that faith all around us. All of that faith is there as an example and all of that faith is just a model of the faith that we should ultimately have in the greatest which is the faith ultimately in Hashem. It's not us. It's a false confidence we have. Real self-awareness would realize that we do the best we can, we take our initiative, we make our effort and we should be proud. We should be proud when we take our potential and with our effort we accomplish and we achieve, we deserve to be proud of what we've done, but we need to realize that we're the junior partner in its achievement. Ultimately it's up to Hashem. And as many times as we successfully lift a cup of coffee, all we have to do is drop it once and spill it on everything to realize how clumsy and incapable we are unless He wills, unless He wills for us to remain coordinated. אם אדם מרגיש את כח השם בתוכו מפי עליון לא תצא הרעות. לא יתכן שיבוא לידי חטא. מובן לידי חטא בהכרח ששכח השם. If you remember Hashem and Hashem is with us everywhere and at all times, then we would be incapable of doing the wrong thing. In that battle between the Yetzer Hara, the animal impulse, the animal instinct, the animal desire, the animal temptation, in that battle between the animal and the disciplined, the dignified, the sovereign, we would win every time. We'd never do the wrong thing, we'd never say the wrong thing, look at the wrong thing, go to the wrong place, think the wrong thing, react in the wrong way. Ela mai, what happens? Chazal already tell us, our rabbis tell us, that when a person makes a mistake, נכנס בו רוח שטות. We became morons, idiots, fools for a moment. In that moment that we want to eat the wrong thing or look at the wrong thing or say the wrong thing or go the wrong place, our mind for a moment suspended our logic and our thinking and we concluded erroneously there's no God, there's no Ruach inside me, there's no consequence, there's no accountability, there's no ability to choose. I'm done, I can't fight these corn chips, I can't fight the image on the internet, I can't fight the juicy Lashon Hara, it's just too good not to share. We think that we can't fight anymore, we've abandoned, we've forfeited, we've absolutely conceded. In that moment, in that moment we've forgotten Hashem, a ruach shtus. That is the voice and that is the influence of shtus, that's foolish, that's foolish, it's a joke. רוח השם לא הייתה גלויה בתוכך בשעה שעשה אותו מעשה. Hashem was not revealing himself through you in that moment because if Hashem were by your side, if Hashem were in your head and mind and thoughts and heart, if you believed the ruach inside you, you still had that power to choose and that power to reach and to stretch, you had that power to be more godly then you'd never make that mistake. So the very mistake is a reflection of a lack of faith in God and a lack of faith in yourself. So what's the antidote, what's the answer? I want to pick up with this next time, we'll finish this piece. אל תשליכנו מלפניך השם, don't give up on me, don't throw me away, don't cast me aside. Yes, I've developed these habits, these patterns. Yes, I failed you and failed to live my best self, but don't give up on me, it's not over, this is going to be my year. I'm finally dedicated, devoted, I'm going to make it happen. I'm going to overcome that voice of resistance. If you haven't listened last week, we gave a talk on the great book of Steven Pressfield, which is The War of Art, how to overcome the yetzer hara, resistance in our lives, the formula to finally break through the resistance by going from amateur to professional. Hashem, al tashlichenu, don't cast me aside because this is it, I'm overcoming resistance, I'm going from amateur to pro, this is going to be my year. And what's the method, what's the strategy, how do we get it done? רוח קדשך אל תקח ממני. I need that ruach kodshecha. I need to see you in me, I need to know that I have free will, I need to know that I have the power to choose. I need emuna in Hashem, we need to believe in Hashem, but even more fundamentally we need to believe in ourselves because if we don't believe in ourselves and our ability to be like Hashem then we're lost, then we're gone, then we've lost the battle even before it's begun. So imirtze Hashem we'll pick up with this next time, until then stay happy, stay healthy, and stay holy. Thank you for joining us, as always please subscribe on our channel on YouTube if you're watching or you're not watching. You want the sheitel update? Everybody knows everything going on in the Goldbergs' lives because you listen to my shiurim. Sheitel update, FedEx has still not found the sheitel, but they are now getting prepared to pay something, so they are negotiating the price of the sheitel, and that is the sheitel update for you this morning. Have a great day everybody, see you tonight behind the bima, be well.
