Transcript
Let's try that again. Good morning, welcome back to Living with *Emuna*. Sorry for the technology complication, but glad we're together now. Hopefully everyone can find it who's looking for it. *Hashem* will determine who gets to find it. The *Emuna* series this morning is sponsored by Dr. Zavi and Bella Morgan in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut, in memory of Bella's mother, Dr. Ellen Chancer. We are forever incredibly grateful to the Morgans for their generosity. This morning's *shiur* is also sponsored by Neil and Brandy Pamper for the *yahrtzeit* of Brenda *bas Simcha* in honor of their daughter Naomi's upcoming birthday. Happy birthday! And by Carol Wald in memory of her brother ראובן רפאל בן בנימין, his *neshamah shetehei la'aliyah*. Thank you. By Jay and Melissa Keen in commemoration of the second *yahrtzeit* of his mother, Helen Klein, her *neshamah shetehei la'aliyah*. By Andrea Zucker in memory of her father Dr. Martin Lehman for his second *yahrtzeit*. Andrea, thank you for coming each week and learning with us. By Aggy Stang in commemoration of the *yahrtzeit* of her beloved mother Olga Newman, ליבא רבקה בת מרדכי. Thank you so much, *neshamah shetehei la'aliyah*. Enjoy your special guest. By Orly Levin in honor of her birthday as a thanks to Rabbi Goldberg and the women of BRS who make the *Emuna shiur* possible. Thank you to the *Emuna* accountability partners, her cousin, sister, and dear friend. So thank you to all of our incredibly generous sponsors. We appreciate it very, very much. Got a giveaway for you, a new giveaway. I'm glad it's finally here. Big thank you to Alon Landau for designing it and a big thank you to Greta Baum for producing it. But we have here a decal for the windshield of your car. I have one on my car, and yesterday when I was driving carpool, yes, little flex, I drove carpool yesterday, I got stuck at, I was running late and I got stuck at the train. You know it's the worst thing, you see the train thing come down and the lights flash, and ah, I got to go, I got things to do, don't you know who I am, what do you mean? And I looked and I looked at that little decal in my windshield. It says אכן יש השם במקום הזה. Embrace your place, you are exactly where you are meant to be. Embrace your place, you are where you're meant to be. Have one for everybody. Feel free to give a little donation to the *shul* if you are grateful for it. Ten dollars, whatever you'd like to give. You could give it in cash, there's a little kiosk in the lobby, you can run your credit card, do it online. But take for however many cars you have. It peels off, it goes in the windshield, and when you're stuck at a red light, stuck behind a slow car, stuck in traffic, stuck behind the train, stuck because you made a wrong turn, you just look up at the little decal and you say: Embrace your place, you are exactly where you are meant to be. We're producing this for luggage tags so that when you're sitting at the airport and you find out your flight's delayed, you can embrace your place. And for your cellphone case. We're not looking to get rich or build our campus off of these, we're just trying to increase and promote *Emuna* for ourselves and around the world. So again, and by the way, if you're listening or you're watching somewhere else, brsonline.org/decal, brsonline.org/decal, and we're happy to send one to you. Just put your information and we're happy to send it to you for your car. Okay, I want to begin but not really begin, but sort of begin, because how could you not begin with Agam Burger? Wow, she is an *Emuna shiur* and I don't want to talk about it now because I'm still processing and thinking about it. I want to talk another time. I just want to say the following. We know that 20-year-old Agam Burger became, grew in her *emuna* and her observance in a tunnel underneath Gaza in captivity while held hostage. Simultaneously and without knowing on a physical level, but we have to believe on some metaphysical level they knew, her mother started keeping *Shabbos* while she was in a tunnel underground. Nothing about this story is normal. Nothing about this story is in this world. It's extraordinary on top of extraordinary on top of extraordinary. She embraced and lived, and when she left Gaza in the hostage deal, and please God all the hostages before Saturday at 12 p.m. today all the hostages should come home, she wrote on a little whiteboard and held in the window of the car when she was released for the world to see her message to the universe was *Derech emuna bacharti*. She didn't write, she can't copyright that phrase, I wish she could, she deserves to make a lot of money off of it. She can't because it's already been copyrighted. Anyone know by whom? *David Hamelech*. *David Hamelech* in תהלים פרק קיט פסוק ל. King David in his *Tehillim* chapter 119 verse 30 writes: *Derech emuna bacharti*. I want to tell you something, I say *Tehillim* every month. Many years ago I started every day *Tehillim* can be divided up into 30 parts, 30 days in a month, you say a little bit every day, you finish all *Tehillim* once a month. I have in it in my *Tehillim*, I have a list of all my children, my grandchildren, the other side a list of all the *cholim*, sick people in our community and that I know of in general and every day. It takes a few minutes. It takes next to nothing. There are people who finish all of Tehillim every day, where Tehillim can also be divided in seven, you can finish it once a week. Once a month you're like nothing. So I'm not, that's the opposite of a flex. But I try to finish it. I've been saying Tehillim for many many many many years, and I am embarrassed and humiliated and ashamed to say I didn't realize that pasuk Derech emuna bacharti until she held it up on a whiteboard in the window of the car taking her to freedom. So not only did she know the pasuk, which is extraordinary, in captivity, she embodies, she lives, she is the pasuk Derech emuna bacharti. Derech emuna bacharti, I have chosen the path of emuna. I have chosen to live with emuna. Now, the only thought I want to share on this today, reserving the right to come back to her, this story, this inspiration another time, is it occurred to me as the world, all these articles are coming out and everyone's speaking about it, everyone's blown away understandably by it, here's what occurred to me: God forbid, God forbid, God forbid a million billion times she wouldn't have gotten out and she wouldn't be released and the story would have the worst possible ending, we would never know, but it would still be extraordinary that Derech emuna bacharti. What makes the story extraordinary is not that we know about it, is not that now all kinds of Jewish swag will be produced with Derech emuna bacharti, who will be the first to create the sweatshirt and the decal and the cups and the bumper sticker? It's that she lived that way without anyone knowing. She didn't do that because she knew she'd come out and all the articles would be written and all the rabbis and rebbetzins would speak about it and everybody would be blown away by it. She lived that way without anyone knowing or noticing except the most important one, Hashem. She did it for herself, Derech emuna bacharti. It was the resilience, the resolve, the tenacity, the strength, it's what got her through, it's how she chose to live. You know, she started keeping kosher in Gaza. And the only way we know about this is not because she came out and said, microphones, cameras, I got a story to tell, you have books to write about me. She didn't tell anybody. The people who were taken and held captive with her on the out when they got out said: do you know she wouldn't eat non-kosher in Gaza? She wouldn't touch the non-kosher food. Do you know she kept Shabbos? Do you know that she found a Siddur while being held hostage and davened every day? Derech emuna bacharti. Derech emuna bacharti. So I just, I feel that Agam Berger, that whiteboard she's holding up is to each and every one of us and challenging us: are you ready to say Derech emuna bacharti? It's a simple question, yes or no. Do you live your life with emuna or not? Do you panic, do you get anxious, do you get worried, do you get envious, do you get arrogant, or do you let go and let God, do you surrender and submit, do you go along for the ride, do you realize that you're a passenger? Are you a thermostat or thermometer? Everything we've talked about for all these years we've been learning. It's a simple question that she's asking each and every one of us. She is telling us that she chose Derech emuna bacharti and now she's asking each and every one of us, Nu, are you on board? Are you on the train? Are you going to get through whatever you're going through in life? And I want to say this again and I want to reiterate incredibly strongly: she did not do that so she would get out. She didn't do that so that when she got out we would all not stop talking about her. What's most remarkable about this story is that she lived it and chose it when she thought no one would ever know about it. And she didn't know if anyone would ever find out about it. And she didn't know if she'd get out. So there's a lot more to process and think about and learn and be inspired by, but it just struck me when I look at that whiteboard I felt like: you talking to me? You're right, I really need to work on this and think about this and grow in this. And I need to be able to answer in the affirmative and the positive to Derech emuna bacharti. A lot more to come back in the future about Agam Berger. A couple emails then we'll get back into our learning. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, my husband and I love your shiurim. Today we listened to Living with Emuna on our way to an IVF egg retrieval. People struggling with fertility, infertility, primary, secondary, it's among the most painful things in the world. The loneliness, the uncertainty, the doubt, the rollercoaster, the physical pain enduring shots and procedures, the emotional and spiritual pain of putting all your trust and faith in Hashem, asking, hoping, waiting, wanting, wondering. We Daven, we Daven from the bottom of our hearts that everybody waiting should get the best news and please God have the most amazing Nachas from the healthiest most beautiful children. As I lay on the operating table before the anesthesiologist administered the sedative, I reflected on how when our infertility journey began ten years ago I was so upset knowing that IVF would be my only path to having children. Baruch Hashem, we're now blessed with three beautiful children. We are incredibly grateful to Hashem for bringing these neshamos into our lives at the perfect time. Still, I occasionally wish we didn't have to endure all the shots, blood tests, ultrasounds, and we could conceive naturally. In that moment on the operating table, I could hear your words in my mind. I am where I'm meant to be. This is our story and it's from Hashem, this is how our children are coming into the world through a beautiful miraculous process that's perfect for us. Choreographed, quote, choreographed and curated by Hashem. I don't know what the future holds, tomorrow we'll find out how many eggs were fertilized and only in a few weeks will we know if it worked. But right now, I'm calm and at peace knowing we are walking this journey with Hashem. Thank you for helping us strengthen our emuna muscle, may Hashem grant us calm in uncertain times, look forward to continuing to learn with you and appreciate the Torah very much. Shabbat Shalom u'mevorach. I hope by now she heard positive results and please God as I said everyone should have healthy wonderful beautiful children on whatever table, in whatever place, with whatever we're going through, embrace your place, you're where you meant to be, אכן יש השם במקום הזה, Hashem is with us wherever we are, let go and let God and go along for the ride and life is an adventure and figure out where he takes us next and it includes painful parts and pleasurable parts but no bad parts because they're all by definition good because they are all from Hashem even when they don't feel like and that's what some of these many, many, many, I've piles of emails and they're amazing and they inspire me and keep writing them and I love them and they blow me away. I'd like to start by thanking you, blah blah blah, I've been listening through hard times and although I can't say I listen all the time, when I am in need and listen it has helped me through some difficult moments. I continue to listening more and a sincere thank you for the weekly chizuk. As I preface this email I'm focusing more on struggles I've been through but Baruch Hashem I am blessed with so much good, thankful to Hashem and it's not taken for granted. I say this knowing pain is the greatest catalyst for growth in the direction of this emuna email. I'll just interrupt myself to say last night we had the great zechus, the Minchas Asher, רב אשר וייס שליט"א spoke last night, many of you were there, Baruch Hashem was a packed house, beautiful crowd, and he said that we're going through difficult times. He reviewed some of the extraordinary questions that he's been dealing with over the last 15 months, unbelievable mind-boggling questions. A soldier wants to know who lost limbs whether you make a Shehecheyanu when you get your prosthetic arm. Which arm what you put tefillin on, prosthetic arm. A soldier wanted to know who got married and the next day went back to the front and his friends wanted to say sheva brachos but there's no kallah. So do you say sheva brachos if you only have the choson but no kallah. He said nobody dealt with these questions because if you had a sheva brachos where there was no kallah there was likely no sheva brachos if the kallah didn't show and didn't want to be there. But at a time of war on a battlefront when friends say we want to celebrate. So and these were just some samples of the questions. So he mentioned in a time of tragedy we all can't help but ask why, why. He said I want to encourage you to ask why not when things are going wrong, I want to encourage you to ask why every day of your life when things are going right. You woke up and you have the same head count in your house, you woke up and everyone's healthy, you woke up you went outside it was a beautiful day, you woke up and you have parnassa, say why. Why me Hashem, why why do I deserve all this bracha, all this bounty, all this good, why? And he said maybe if we ask why more when everything's going right we won't be in a position to have to ask why when things are going wrong. If we say and ask more why when everything's going right we won't have to ask why when everything's going wrong. So the emuna gets us through these hard times. Like a lot of emuna emails you read this one does not have a happy ending yet. I'm 31 years old and not married. I've dated 107 guys and only a few of but who's counting and only a few of them seriously. The week after Succos I started dating someone long distance, confidently felt this was the one. We dated two and a half months and although there were some bumps along the way, everything was not going as smoothly as I hoped, I was so grateful to Hashem for finally sending me my bashert, meaning someone I really want to spend the rest of my life with. Everything I'd been told to look for in a spouse matched, values, chemistry. Throughout the process I really tried to cling to my emuna, was all meant to be, it would work out for the best. Three weeks ago he ended it. And Hashem clearly decided us being together was not for my best albeit my heart and mind feeling very differently and hoping that the outcome changes. Being 31 and single presents itself with so much challenges in the frum world. Throughout them all I have tried hard to cling to Hashem and really worked on strengthening my emuna muscles over the years. You speak about letting yourself feel pain and having emuna. Sometimes it is so hard for me, in the last few years I just crumbled and gave all my pain over to Hashem and asked him to hold it for me. A constant battle of ups and downs, but I've always used emuna to keep myself happy through the process and work on internalizing everything Hashem does is for my best and he's got me. Baruch Hashem I've been lucky to say mostly stay, mostly positive and happy and rely on my amazing friends and family for support. This time I'm really struggling to feel my emuna. On one hand I really logically know it's for the best for me. I truly believe Hashem knows what's best, I am where I'm meant to be, and most importantly Hashem loves me, has something better in store. There've been moments where I feel Hashem holding me and sometimes in moments of doubt where I'm embarrassed to say I feel Hashem is just being mean to me. Last week in your shiur you mentioned waiting for a shidduch is not relying on a nes and something within the realm of Hashem's doing. Rabbi Goldberg, it feels like waiting for a nes. Having the zechus to get married, have children, be able to leave this stagnant purgatory of being a frum single. Just think about that, that language, those words. If you're married, if you're happily married, if your children are married, think about those who are not, feeling that they're in a stagnant purgatory of being a frum single. It seems like a nes nigleh. I would appreciate if Rabbi Goldberg has any advice or chizuk on navigating emunah through pain and hurt and how to cling to emunah when one feels alone and hopeless. I will say listening to your shiurim has helped me immensely through the last few weeks. I want to share an emunah story that really jumped out at me after listening to your shiur last week and watching Agam Berger come out of Gaza choosing the path of emunah. All that construction's giving a lot of dust in here today. It's a lot of dust. Can you keep passing those tissues? Thank you. It's the construction. Dusty, very dusty. Okay. So she ends with a very positive and amazing story. I love the story, that's why I shared this email. I can't tell you how many emails I have are particularly from singles navigating being single and struggling with the emunah and the ups and the down and the hope and disappointment and the trust and the wait and the wonder and the why and will it happen and the when and I almost feel like we need to have a special shiur group, learning. We should, we should get everybody. I've tried, we've tried to actually make some shidduchim from getting some resumes. I've had men who listen to the emunah shiur who say, could you connect me with whoever wrote that email? And I'm waiting for the ultimate emunah story of the shidduch that we make from the emails. Shidduch from the emails. It'll happen, im yirtzeh Hashem it's going to happen. It's going to happen, but let me finish this email. So she says, I want to share an emunah story that really jumped out at me after listening to your shiur last week and watching Agam Berger come out of Gaza choosing the path of emunah. I was riding the emunah wave of everything that happens for the best and everything is going to be great. I had just met a single friend for her 33rd birthday and she was also feeling quite down. When I left, I decided to take a cab because it was frigid outside writing from New York City. As I was walking towards the street to get a cab, I noticed that six open taxis with the light on driving by, so I was confident I would easily find one. When I got to the street and started hailing a cab, there were no available cabs to be seen. I was about to get into my negative just my luck mindset when a cab with the light off stopped to pick me up with no passenger in the back. I've been living in New York City for 31 years and never once has a cab with the light off stopped for me that was empty. Rabbi Goldberg, this was a huge hug from Hashem. I realized I think I know that I know all the guys out there at this point and I've dated almost everyone that could be for me, but Hashem showed me that sometimes the light is off and you don't see them coming. Hashem can send me the cab with the light off that is hiding or I just didn't see. What do I know? Hashem is capable of anything. To top it off, the cab's meter broke so he couldn't charge me for the ride and he told me it was free. I gave cash anyway, gave cash anyway, made a kiddush Hashem but it's the principle that matters. Now I do not have my happy ending yet, but I do know that Hashem loves me and I greatly appreciated His hug. Thank you again for the shiurim that allow me to move my emunah cup so that it does not turn to ice. Remember we talked about that? Keeping the emunah moving, keeping the emunah hot, keeping the fire of emunah going, because if you leave it and you let it sit still, it's going to get cold. It's going to get cold, it's going to congeal, it's going to turn to ice. So she invoked all the lingo and that touches my heart. But we davened for her and for her friend and for all who are waiting that they should find their bashert. Okay, we got to get to the learning, but there's so many, so many emails. So many emails and they include a lot of questions and some have wonderful happy endings, the cab that came right at the time and the person was willing to give it for free and the message that it sent right when they needed it. I was once with an older single coming back from a trip and we were waiting at the luggage at the conveyor belt in the airport. And he turned to me and he said, You know Ephraim, dating is like waiting for your luggage. You sit and you wait and you're watching and they go around and you're looking, is that mine? Is that mine? And then you see one and you say, I think that's mine, and you take it off and you look a little closer and you realize that's not mine and you put it back. And then you wait a little bit longer and you look for yours. And you have hope that if you wait long enough, eventually your suitcase is going to come. So whether it's the cab or whether it's the suitcase, hopefully you don't have to wait long at all and you're a VIP, so yours comes off quickly and you find yours and you move on. Okay, we're going to save these—we have more emails. Keep sending them. We're saving them. We're going to keep—I read every one. I read and respond to every one. So keep sending them, as I say the exercise of writing it is so, excuse me, is so critically important for you. I believe we're on page *Chof Tes* in *Rav* David Abuhatzeira's *Emuna U'bitachon*, page 29, the bottom left-hand column. If I'm wrong, don't correct me. That's where I think we are. We last left off *Rav* David Abuhatzeira telling us the beautiful insight of the *Sasover*, *Rav Moshe Leib Sasover*. The *pasuk* says ויברכם ביום ההוא לאמר, *Yaakov Avinu* gave a *bracha* to his grandchildren, to his *einiklach* *bayom hahu*. He gave *Ephraim* and *Menashe* a *bracha* *bayom hahu* on that day. Says *Rav Moshe Leib Sasover*, read it, ויברכם ביום ההוא לאמר. What was the *bracha* that he gave them? *Bracha* he gave them was *bayom hahu*. Be present. Be in that day. Get to the end of that day. Get to the end of that day. Get to the end of that day. Get to the end of that day. That's what we have to do. Whatever hardship or challenge you're going through in life, get to the end of that day. Ah, what's going to be in a week and a month and a year and a decade? What's going to be—you don't know, you don't control, it's not there yet. All we have is today. What do I need to do today? When people are in crisis and as a *rav* I'm involved in people's lives in crisis and one of the pieces of advice that I try to give is don't get lost in the future, just focus on what do you have to do today. What doctor appointment, what follow-up, what bill has to be paid, what has to get done today? Today, *hayom*. *Vayevarchaim*, the biggest *bracha* is *vayevarchaim bayom hahu*. The biggest *bracha* is *bayom hahu*. *Bayom hahu* was actually last week's *parsha*. We spoke about it at the holy *ra'ava de-ra'avin* of the *Rebbe* of Dinov and the *Seuda Shlishis* this past week, because when we panicked, when we feared, when we were stuck between the rock and the hard place, the *Mitzrim*, the Egyptians, and the sea, and *Hashem* says, *al tira*, don't be afraid. התיצבו וראו את ישועת ה' stand up firm, stand up straight, and you will see *Hashem* save you. And that *pasuk* several times uses the word *hayom*. *Hashem* is going to save you today. If you're present in this moment and you know what you have to do today, *vayevarchaim*, that's the biggest *bracha*, get through today. ואתחנן אל ה' בעת ההיא לאמר, *Moshe* *davened* *ba'is hahi*. Be in that moment. Now we're on the left-hand column. What page? *Chof Tes*, 29. וכן אמר משה רבינו לבני ישראל ובקשתם משם את ה' אלקיך. *Moshe* later in *Sefer Devarim* says *uvikashtem misham*. *Rav* Soloveitchik has a brilliant essay called *Uvikashtem*. I think it was translated into English as well, based on this *pasuk*. *Uvikashtem misham*, and request and seek and search *Hashem misham*. What does *misham* mean? From there. משם היינו מאותו המקום והזמן שתהיו ולא תהיה מחשבתכם אזמנים אחרים. Where can you find and where should you search *Hashem? *Misham*. Stuck behind a train, in a hospital room, with a canceled flight, wherever you are, on the IVF table to retrieve eggs, *uvikashtem misham*. Wherever you are, *misham*, search for and look for *misham* wherever you are. וכן מצאנו הרבה ציוויים בתורה בדרך זה. And we find this often that *Hashem* is telling us how do you live with *emuna* by being present in the moment? By embrace your place. You are where you're meant to be. יש ה' במקום הזה. Where you are, ask: why am I here? What am I meant to be doing? Yesterday somebody from Israel came to meet with me. Yesterday someone from Israel was in and met with me, a very special person who works for an incredible Jewish organization that is doing amazing things for *Yerushalayim Ir Hakodesh*. And he sees and meets very prominent people and goes to extraordinary places and shared with me that his life took him on an adventure to Mississippi to meet with a certain prominent person and he wondered why *Hashem*, why am I taking two flights, a two-hour Uber ride, then a two-hour Uber ride back to take two more flights to meet with this person? And he set out on it saying, *Hashem*, it's an adventure. I'm on your, your adventure. So I wonder why. And by the end of the day, and he shared with me one of the things he wanted to meet with me about was to tell me—he didn't write it in an email, he told me the *emuna* stories—was who his Uber driver was and what came from that two-hour conversation and what happened from that meeting and the difference it made. And we go on this adventure and when we do it with our eyes and our ears open and our antenna extended and we're watching and listening and waiting to find out, *nu Hashem*, this is an adventure, what's in store? Why was this canceled? Why is this in traffic? Why am I delayed? Why did you put me in this position? Why am I here? Why? Why did I meet this person? Why am I sitting next to this one? Then we live uvikashtem misham. Just take that deep breath, restore that neshama with that neshima, take that deep breath and ask uvikashtem misham, vayevarcheim bayom hahu. Today. Why am I where I am today? Misham, where I am, what am I meant to be doing? And we see this a lot of places. ראה אנכי נתן לפניכם היום. Hashem says see, I've placed before you hayom, bracha uklala. Hashem says I gave you today. Don't forfeit today because you're so stuck on yesterday or you're so focused on tomorrow. There are so many people who lose the present moment. They forfeit their present, and all we have is the present. That's why it's a gift from Hashem, it's why it's called the present. Yesterday is gone, tomorrow's not yet here, and the present is called the present because it's a gift from above, it's a gift from Hashem. It's called the present. And how many people forfeit the present, they lose the present, because they're so focused, so holding on, so stuck in yesterday. We spoke all about that, the regret. Could've, I should've, I didn't, why did I? And they're so stuck on their mistakes, they're so stuck on their choices, they're so stuck on their past, that they're forfeiting their very present because they're so filled with remorse. But reshaim milei charata. Chazal said it's wickedness to be filled with regret, to be so stuck on the past. And the other half of the population are so focused on the future. What will be? And I'm so nervous and I'm so anxious and I'm so worried, and how will it turn out? Just go to sleep. Can't we talk about that tomorrow? I'm saying theoretically about my neighbor. Can't we talk about that tomorrow? What are you so worried about the future and what will be and how will it work out and should we and can we and will we? Okay, just go to sleep. Get some sleep. Let's focus on right now. Bayom hahu. ראה אנכי נתן לפניכם היום. Hayom. Christopher Reeve, Superman, I've told this story before. Superman, who led the end of his life as a paraplegic because in an equestrian race his horse fell on top of him and left him paralyzed for life. He shared once what happened. What was Superman's kryptonite? What went wrong that left him paralyzed for life? And he said he knew that in this particular race it was very difficult, there were some very difficult jumps, I don't know what they're called, jumps, I don't ride horses. There were some difficult jumps. And he was very focused on a difficult jump that was coming up. And that was not the hurdle or the jump that his horse tripped on, fell on top of him, and left him paralyzed. Which one was it? It was the one before. Because the jump before, he was already thinking about the next difficult one, he took his mind off of that moment what he was doing and it cost him his movement, it cost him his life. He was paralyzed the rest of his life because he forfeited his present. He wasn't bayom hahu. He wasn't ראה אנכי נתן לפניכם היום. He wasn't uvikashtem misham. In every moment be focused on that moment. Often that moment is about planning for our future, but that's what we're meant to do in that moment. I'm not saying be reckless and careless and don't care about the future. You gotta save money for the future, you gotta buy life insurance and disability insurance and long-term care insurance for the future. There are things that responsible people have to do for their future. Rav Moshe has a teshuva about insurance. It's not lack of emuna to have insurance. Maybe we can learn that at one point. Buying insurance is not a lack of emuna, it is an expression of emuna. It's a responsible thing to do and everyone should do it. Sometimes in the present is planning for our future, but that's the way we're using the present. Don't forfeit, you forfeit the present, you could become paralyzed. It could be the kryptonite that brings Superman down. וידעת היום והשבות אל לבבך. V'yadata hayom. Another pasuk in Devarim. Know hayom. What do we need to know in order to v'hashevota in order to return to Hashem? Know hayom. Know how to live today. והיו הדברים האלה אשר אנכי מצוך היום. Know all these things that I am commanding you hayom. שכל מחשבותיך ודבריך אודות אותו היום בלבד ועל ידי כן זוכים לעבודת השם באמונה וביטחון says Rav David Abuhatzeira, one of the secrets, the way we exercise the emuna muscle, the way we put on the emuna glasses, the way we live a life of emuna, one of the ways that we do it is how? Hayom. Be present. Be present. It is the opposite of emuna to panic, be anxious, be worried, be overly consumed with arrogance about my control needing to control the future. All of that is the opposite of emuna. Emuna, a manifestation, an expression, a fulfillment of emuna is: live in the present. Be present. Be present. Focus on the present. I am יש ה' במקום הזה, I am where I'm meant to be. Embrace your place. Be in the present. Uvikashtem misham, hayom. That's emuna. Hashem, I got it. I don't know what's going to be. I don't know how it's going to turn out. I don't know what the lab results are going to show. All I know is today. I've Done today what I need to do today today. I'm focused on the end of today. I'm focused on the why of why do I have so much blessing today? Why am I worthy? Why do I deserve it? Why Hashem, why me when it comes to today, Hayom? I'll tell you one more he doesn't have in here. One more he doesn't have in here. The Gemara in Sanhedrin, Gemara in Sanhedrin tzaddi-hey, tzaddi-chet, the Gemara somewhere in Sanhedrin tells a story of Yehoshua ben Levi was walking in the market and he came across Eliyahu Hanavi, Elijah the prophet. And he said to him, "When is Mashiach coming? When is Mashiach coming?" So Eliyahu Hanavi, Elijah the prophet said to him, "Ask him! He's going to be in the market in this and this time, in this and this place, and he spends his day, those with tzara'at, those with leprosy, he's helping change their bandages. You can find him changing their bandages. Don't ask me, go ask him!" Yehoshua ben Levi is ecstatic. Gonna meet Mashiach. I can ask him when he's coming. Everybody's waiting: redemption, peace, serenity, hostages home, soldiers with their family, illnesses healed. Who doesn't want Mashiach? We want Mashiach now. You know, everybody wants Mashiach, not just the shtiebel minyan, we all want Mashiach. And we all want Mashiach now, whatever minyan you go to. So Yehoshua ben Levi goes to that place and that time and he finds Mashiach and he says, "Mashiach!" He says, "Yes?" "When are you coming?" He says, "Hayom. Today." Yehoshua bar-karcha, Yehoshua ben Levi walks away, ooh-ah, a skip in his step. Mashiach's coming today! Today he'd be like the first to tweet it. Just met Mashiach, just met Mashiach, told me he's coming today, I'm the first to announce it. Viral, it's going to go viral. The day ends, no Mashiach. No Mashiach. Mashiach didn't come, we know that, spoiler alert, because he's still not here yet. So Mashiach's not here. So Yehoshua ben Levi goes to Eliyahu Hanavi and he says, "What's the deal? You told me to find him and ask him, I did, he said he'd come today and he didn't come today. What's the deal?" So Eliyahu Hanavi said, "What did he tell you?" So I said, "Well I asked him, when are you coming? And he said, Hayom." Eliyahu Hanavi said, "No, you didn't understand. He wasn't telling you he's coming today. He was telling you how to bring him. And the way to bring him: היום אם בקולו תשמעו. The way to bring him is if every Yid, every Jew will start living Hayom, be present in that day, make the most of that day, live every day to its fullest, live every day with emuna, that's when he's going to come. Why was he in the market changing the bandages? Because that's something that you're present, you do one by one, you're fully invested, fully mindful, fully present. Mashiach knows how to live Hayom in that moment, in that day, and what he was telling you was not when he's coming, what he was telling you was the secret to how to bring him: Hayom, Hayom. How do you live a life of emuna, how do you live with emuna? ויברכם ביום ההוא לאמר ביום ההוא. On that day. ובקשתם משם את ה' אלהיך. Wherever we are in that moment, don't say, 'When I retire I'll learn, I'll go to shiurim, I'll daven, I'll have emuna.' When I recover from this illness, then I'll have emuna. When I have enough money in the bank, I'll have emuna. When I can switch out this spouse for version 2.0, I'll have emuna. When my kids grow up and they stop annoying me and waking me up in the middle of the night, I'll have emuna, I'll have time. No, uvikashtem misham. Wherever you are, whatever circumstance you're in, wherever life has you right now, from there, from that place, you can lean in and find Him. You can and need to, what else what other choice is there? וידעת היום והשבות אל לבבך הנני נותן לפניכם היום והיו הדברים האלה אשר אנכי מצוך היום. Everything is on Hayom. Turn the page. Vezeh shehikshu chazal, and says Rav David Abuhatzeira, page lamed, page 30. This is what our rabbis asked, the Gemara in Yoma on daf ayin-vav. שאלו תלמידיו את רבי שמעון בר יוחאי מפני מה לא ירד להם לישראל מן פעם אחת בשנה. Why didn't Hashem, oh I love it, I absolutely love it when emuna and parsha come together. So we just read last week's parsha, we're continuing to read now, about the miracle of the man, the miracle of the man falling. So, why did Hashem make the man fall only once? מפני מה לא ירד להם לישראל מן פעם אחת בשנה? Why didn't it fall once a year? אמר להם אמשול לכם משל למה הדבר דומה למלך בשר ודם שיש לו בן אחד פסק לו מזונותיו פעם אחת בשנה ולא היה מקביל פני אביו אלא פעם אחת בשנה. There was a king and he gave his son enough money, enough provisions, enough resources, enough food for the whole year. So how often did he see his son? Once a year. חזר ופסק מזונותיו בכל יום. So he said we're switching it up. You come every day and I'll give you the food for today. Come every day and I'll give you allowance for today. How often did he see his son? Every day. Every day? היה מקביל פני אביו כל יום. אף ישראל מי שיש לו ארבעה וחמישה בנים היה דואג ואומר שמא לא ירד מן למחר ונמצאו כולם מתים ברעב נמצאו כולם מכוונים את לבם לאביהם שבשמים. Hakadosh Baruch Hu by making the man fall every day and you couldn't if you didn't take it in for that day, it melted in the sun. If you tried to freeze it, Jews love to freeze things. Does this freeze? Can you freeze this? Did you know that I just learned. Did you know and it's delicious that you can freeze muddy buddies? Do you know what muddy buddies are? Did you know you can freeze them? They're fantastic. Fantastic. Chex Mix covered in sugar and chocolate. Really good for you. Don't put it on your spreadsheet that you ate it. It doesn't go on the spreadsheet. Did you know you can freeze muddy buddies? There was a point earlier in our marriage on motzei shabbos where I was worried I was going to get put in the freezer. If I didn't move quickly enough, I was going to get frozen for the future. So the man you couldn't freeze. Hakadosh Baruch Hu said if you try to take the man and put it in the freezer for later leftovers, it melted, it spoiled, it was no good. Man was not like muddy buddies, you couldn't freeze. You think you came for the emuna shiur and a decal for your windshield? You all just learned about muddy buddies. Got to make muddy buddies. Or you could do it the old fashioned way, you could just order them online. Delicious. I don't remember, somebody just got us as a gift some buckets of these muddy buddies. They're an evil cruel person because these things are so good and you just dive right into the bucket of the muddy buddies. That's why you got to put them in the freezer. Anyway, so the man spoiled. You couldn't freeze it. Why? Why did Hashem only make enough fall for that day? You know why? Because every night you went to sleep you had to say to Hashem please let the man fall again tomorrow. I don't feel secure. You can't go to Costco and stock up on man. You can't go buy Costco size. There's no BOGO on man. You can't get a coupon. There's no cabinet. There's no you can't stock up on man, on man. Why did Hashem do that? Because he wants to hear from us every day. So it's an entirely different perspective when when you feel there's something missing, whether and I'm going to say this with sensitivity and love and and prayer, whether it's the missing of a child or the missing of a spouse, or the missing of the money to pay the bills this month, or the missing of what you need to finish your campus or whatever's missing, instead of being bitter, resentful, negative, and afraid, say Hashem you're doing this so I reach out to you. You're making my man fall once a day. You're making me not know if it's going to fall tomorrow so that I turn and lean in and connect and come closer and I realize you're not doing it because you hate me or to hurt me, you're doing it because you love me and you want to hear from me. Now, there's only so many days in a row, I know someone's going to write this email, there's only so many days in a row that you can say I know you want to hear from me, you keep hearing from me, now can you make my man fall? And I'm with you, and I'm protesting Hashem with you, and I'm davening with you, and I'm begging him with you, and I'm telling you this is no good with you. I'm with you, we're demonstrating and we're protesting and we're davening. I'm with you. But for all of us, certainly when it comes to the smaller, less, more insignificant, inconsequential things in life than a spouse and a baby and the bills, we should transform and pivot from where are you and how could you and why is this happening to oh, I get it, you want to hear from me in this moment. You're holding back like the king who says to the son you got to come daily to get your food because I want to hear from you. Like the kid you sent to Israel for the year that you give the debit card instead of the credit card because you want them to call to say I need you to put more money on the debit card. Because I happen to be very blessed, I hear from my children every day with or without it, Baruch Hashem we talk often so I don't want my children to think I'm talking about them, but I know people that if they didn't use a debit card and have to put money on it, they'd never hear from their children. וכיון שכל כך תלה המן בכל יום כדי שיכוונו לבם לאביהם שבשמים מצוה להתפלל ולבקש בכל יום על המזונות. So if the man is our lives, right? We eat the lechem mishneh on shabbos. Why do you have two challahs Friday night, two challah shabbos day, and preferably two challah rolls at shalosh seudos? Because we're commemorating the double portion that fell on Friday of the man. Every week we remember the man. And the man falls for us because every time you get a paycheck, the man just fell. Every time you run your credit card through the machine at the store and it says approved, you could remove it, the man just fell. Every time you look in your bank account and there's something in it, it's not in the red, the man just fell. The man just fell. ובגם מי שחננו השם מזונותיו מצויים לו בהרווחה לא ימנע עצמו מלהתפלל עליהם קודם סעודתו. I've so much in my in my bank account. I've so much that's there. I remember, this goes back many years, but one of our friends who used to live here, she moved, she had fantastic dating stories. She had a great attitude, she dated for a long time, but she had some really funny stories from her dating and she had a great attitude about it. So she told us about one guy she went out with who spent the whole date talking about money. You can make money with this, and you can invest with that, and here's the best place to put it, and there's the biggest return on it. And she was so frustrated. She was at a stage and phase of life, and she still is, of emuna and bitachon in Hashem. So realizing it wasn't for her, she decided she'd give him a little bit of mussar and she'd said, "You know, Hashem gives and Hashem takes away and Hashem decides and determines how much we have." He said, "You're right. But if you put it in a bond or a CD, nobody can touch it. Nobody can touch it, not even Hashem." Remember that? So we are supposed to, no matter how much you have in the bank, no matter where you put it, we need to know and we need to realize that it's all from Hashem. It's all from Hashem. And by the way, he could take it away, not in the money, cause you could put it in a bond or a CD, it's guaranteed and the warranty and it's backed by the government. But you know if he takes things that you can't have a guarantee or warranty, like your health. He could take things that you don't you don't know. I was just talking to somebody who works at PragerU. Dennis Prager should have a refuah shleimah. Top of the world, speaks to millions of people, incredible. And he had a terrible accident a few months ago. Baruch Hashem I understand he's recovering and on a path to a refuah shleimah, but he just got off the intubation. He was terribly, terribly sick and ill and broke many bones in his body because of a terrible accident that he fell. A person could be going through life on top of the world, all the followers, all the fame, all the influence, all the difference you're making, and a little accident, unanticipated, leaves you changed forever. Superman, Christopher Reeve, in one moment, paralyzed from the neck down, life is changed forever. When we realize how fragile, how vulnerable, on the days that we can walk and we're healthy and we can breathe, you say "Why, Hashem? Why me? Why do I deserve such bracha? Why do I deserve such health? Why do I deserve things going so right?" We should say "Why me?" on those days. So the mon fell every day because every day we should ask ourselves, "Why me?" Why do I deserve this mon? Why do I have money in my bank account? Why can I pay my bills? Why do I have my health? Why do I have everything so wonderfully? כמבואר בלשון הבקשה ואל תצריכנו השם אלקינו לא לידי מתנת בשר ודם אלא לידך המלאה והרחבה. And here Rav David Abuhatzeira invokes from our benching, the language in benching, we'll end with this. v'al tatzrichenu Hashem, never make me לידי מתנת בשר ודם, never make me rely on handouts from other people. אלא לידך המלאה והרחבה. Let me always be in Your hands. Your generous and gracious hands. שתמיד ירגיש האדם שהוא נזקק לחסדי הבורא יתברך ויהיה תמיד אומן ומבקש על כל צרכיו ולא יסמוך על עצמו במאומה. Never rely on ourselves, never credit ourselves, never lean or rely on others, realize we are always in the hands of Hashem. Every day, why me? Why do I have such bracha? Why do I have such bracha? So we all have this opportunity, derech emuna bacharti. I'm not trying to compete who can make the first bumper sticker for that. Right? It's the next decal for our for our windshield or for our phone case or for our laptop. But every day we should wake up and ask ourselves, derech emuna bacharti? Question mark. Dovid Hamelech. Are we choosing the path of emuna? Or are we choosing the path of panic? Are we choosing the path of pleasure? Are we choosing the path of is it derech emuna bacharti? Whatever's going on. Whatever we gotta navigate, whatever we're trying to figure out, whatever's going right, whatever's going wrong, derech emuna bacharti. So I want to wish all of us we should hear good news today. Amen. We should all have only simchas and share simchas with one another today and every day. Hostages should come home. Amen. We should be blessed with only the best of everything. And all those waiting to have children should have healthy children. All those pregnant with children should have easy and healthy labors. All those waiting for their bashert should find their spouse and we should share many, many simchas together. Have a great day. Amen.
