Transcript
Good morning, good morning, boker tov. Welcome back to Living with Emunah. I want to thank our generous Emunah series sponsors Avi and Bella Morgen in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut, in memory of Bella's mother Dr. Ellen Schanzar. Very grateful as always for their generosity and for their sponsorship. As always, we're going to begin with some Emunah stories, Emunah emails, and then we'll dive back into the text that we are learning, Emunah U'Bitachon, Rav David Abuchatzeira. So grateful you are here with us. A lot of guests visiting. Thank you for waking up early, spending your morning with us, braving the elements in Florida, the cold, the frigid cold, the snow, Northern Florida, the winter coats, the Uggs. It's amazing to see. Okay, Lichvod Rabbi Goldberg, I have the greatest Emunah email to share for three reasons, writes the author. Number one, it happened in a car. Number two, the circumstance was completely mundane and uneventful, and number three, there was no spectacular outcome. My type of story. Having said that, here goes. Last week, I was running late but managed to get out of the house, drop my son off at school, head to work. In a bit of a frenzy, I made the 15-minute drive to work. Just as I turned into the parking lot, for some unknown reason, I decided to glance in the mirror. To my horror, I noticed I was wearing my band fall without my hairband. If there are men listening, I have a wife and six daughters. I'll explain, email, I'll explain to you what that means. The mirror revealed back to me a shock of white hair sticking out from in front of my brown fall. Imagine what I see when I look in the mirror. The more mature women in the shiur would understand, she writes. Instead of losing my cool, I looked up at my dashboard and imagined I had an Emunah sticker. I'm always where I need to be. I made a U-turn, returned back home, grabbed the proper head garb. It was 30 minutes out of my way to drive there, but the Emunah muscles have been strengthened thanks to the Rav's shiur. So in those moments, I had an Emunah moment. I don't want to embarrass anyone. I won't say who it was. I'm related to them by marriage, my own, but I was traveling this week, and a total amateur movement, moment, somebody left a bottle of water in their pocketbook at TSA. It's an amateur move, amateur moment. I'm not saying who it was. I don't want to embarrass anyone. I don't want to embarrass them. But as the TSA agent took it, that person to whom I'm related by marriage said, "We are where we're meant to be." So it is coming back to bite me. We are where we're meant to be. Anyway, and I'll be using that a lot. Yes. Your dry cleaning is where it's meant to be. Anyway, dinner is where it's meant to be. Okay, we have to be careful, we have to be careful how much we use it. Rabbi Goldberg, hope this email finds you well. I want to first thank you all did blah blah blah blah blah. When I was in miluim at the beginning of the war, and I'm reading this not to toot my own horn, I'm reading it because it is a reminder, it was a reminder to me when I read it how important it is to make these gestures. The person writes, "I want to thank you all you do, not sure if you remember when I was in miluim in the beginning of the war, you offered to come and meet me where I was stationed around Efrat. Unfortunately, the timing didn't work out, but I remember well the message you sent me, which gave me a lot of chizuk during that time." Again, I read that only because it should remind all of us. You have family, you have friends, you have former neighbors, they're in the heart of it, their children are on the battlefield, they're not home, they're in the army. Take a moment, send a text, make a phone call, it means the world, it means the world. I want to thank you for Living with Emunah. A few years ago, when I was just starting kollel while I was enjoying delving into Shas u'Poskim all day long, I felt dry and if something was missing. Someone suggested your shiurim on Simcha through Rav Itche Meir in Im Be'Darchecha, which were just the injection of sweet Torah I needed to combine with my learning, and it's been a huge part of my growth for me and my wife and our whole family ever since then. I love about this email is the first paragraph is when I was in miluim, when I was fighting, and the next paragraph is when I was in kollel and I was learning Shas u'Poskim, and there's no contradiction and there's no hefsek, there's no break between the two. He's a kollel yungerman, married, learning Shas u'Poskim who in a moment that was called, "When I was in miluim, when I was in war." I also truly believe that the weekly chizuk and mindfulness and Emunah your shiurim evoked prepared me for this war, which for our family meant hundreds of days with me in miluim, with my wife at home with our baby son alone with little help, and entering eventually being zoche to myself to be part of the war in Lebanon. In moments of imminent danger to my life, I was able to trust in Hashem with no fear, due to the Torah that you teach each week, so truly thank you. Sorry for the long intro, here's the story. A few weeks ago, I took our car for its routinely yearly inspection. We knew there was a small issue with the headlight that needed to be fixed, but we hoped this would be a routine check with no additional costs. Unfortunately, the dealership called me to tell me the car failed the test and it would need to be fixed. While this was disappointing, we recognized it's from Hashem, it's for the best. A few hours later, they called me again to tell me they opened up the car. And so the entire brake system needed to be replaced and it would be another expensive charge. The sum total ended up being a lot of money that we had to pay unexpectedly. This was not great news to hear as a young family with myself being in learning, teaching, we Baruch Hashem everything we need, but this was out of the blue a huge sum of money threw a big monkey wrench in our monthly budget. Then I realized something incredible. A week ago my grandma called me randomly out of the blue to tell me that she was sending us money for our car insurance. I was completely confused why she felt the need to do this. We'd never discussed this before. But she insisted on helping us and sending money for this specific reason. In the moment, I just thought this was her being caring and quirky self. Then I popped in the dollar sum she sent us and there it was. Almost the exact amount we had to pay for the cost of our car. Wow, Hashem is the best, this was a true wink from him, our mezonot are set out from the beginning of the year by Hashem. It was a real-life example of this. Hashem always has our back in the big life challenges and even in the small ones too. He should be safe and well and home with his family and shteiging and learning and growing and writing beautiful emails like that. My name is such and such, I made aliyah with my family two and a half years ago from such and such. Love the shiurim, yada yada, blah blah blah. I've taken a very important lesson from a theme I see in the shiurim. The idea that I can talk to Hashem whenever and wherever I am. I do not have to be davening shul or in a Beis Medrash to speak to Hashem. Because of the shiurim I have a conversation with Hashem outside of shul at least once a day. I noticed that between work, carpool, and errands I was finding it difficult to speak to Hashem and ask him for the big and small things and just talk. It was very interesting to note I had an easier time doing errands for an hour than to just sit down and have a conversation with Hashem. So every day at 9:50 AM I have a reminder in my phone called TTH, talk to Hashem. If I cannot get to it then I do not get rid of the reminder until I speak to Hashem. I've seen the magnificent results of this already as I am now conversing with Hashem much more during my day when things go well and when they do not go so well. So thank you, keep up the amazing work. TTH, put a reminder in the phone, make time, schedule time, otherwise it won't happen. Hi Rabbi, a Makash student living in Boca recently ended a relationship. Even though I know it's for the best, it's been hard. I decided to dedicate this time off dating to work on myself and specifically my emunah. Shiur has been a big part. This morning I rushed out of my house to make sure I got on time to work, turns out I had more than enough time so I decided to stop for coffee. I figured I was just running in and out, I didn't even look if I was parking and I needed to pay for it or anything. Turns out it was. As I'm walking out of Starbucks I see parking enforcement right in front of my car. I obviously got nervous, got a ticket, thinking I was getting a ticket but I thought to myself if I did, it's my fault, I'll pay for it. But then I got to my car and saw luckily I had gotten there at the exact moment before they started doing parking enforcement. I immediately thought of this as a huge hug from Hashem. Prior to listening to the shiur I would have immediately thought thank God in that moment, then I would just move on. Now I'm thinking of it as a real emunah strengthener and trying to think of all the moments in life as moments to acknowledge Hashem is putting me where I need to be. It's very much helped me move and beyond the end of my relationship and looking forward to the future. He should be zoche to a big simcha bekarov soon, should dance at the wedding. Okay, maybe one more. Again, Baruch Hashem I'm so grateful everyone who writes in. Keep writing, I read them all, they touch me all, they mean, they inspire a lot. I just can't read them all at least each week. We have to do it over time. They are really great. Alright here's one. My name is such and such and I live in such and such a place. I've heard about you from my bubby. I get that a lot. I go everywhere and people say do you know my grandparents they live in Boca. Anyway I heard about you from my bubby, that's my demographic, the bubbies. I heard about you from my bubby who lived in Boca the last few years of her life with her son. Anyway this is my story. I just made a Bar Mitzvah for my son who's named after my father. My mother also, my mother's also not alive. The week after I was just having all sorts of feelings and wasn't doing well. I decided I need to listen to some emunah shiur. I went onto Spotify and simply typed in emunah and your name came up. I only knew of you from my bubby which is why I started listening to you. I started with the most recent shiur and then I had a question which was really bothering me. I know with emunah we're supposed to let go and let God and there are certain things in life I really want right now but I decided I'm going to trust Hashem has a plan for me and will give me what I want in the right time. But we're also supposed to daven and ask him for what we want. So that sounds like a contradiction. Let go and let Hashem take control but at the same time we're asking Hashem for what we want. So why are we davening and asking for something he knows is not necessarily good for us, asking him to change his mind? This past Friday as I was cooking for Shabbos it was quiet in the house and I decided to start listening to your shiurim from the first one. In part three or four I got my answer. I couldn't believe it. The answer you gave was that when we daven we ask Hashem to help us change our perspective, try to understand and accept. So not the most amazing emunah story for me, it was what I needed. Your shiurim keep going. Thank you for the time in reading this long email, which is not a long email, you should see some of the emails. That was not a, that was not a long one. But a beautiful one. And maybe we'll address that question again because part three or four was a very long time ago. I'm working on, if anyone knows how to do this here or you're watching and you could email me, if AI could index the emunah shiurim. So that we'd be able to look back and say we talked about this in that shiur and people can find what they want or need or are interested in hearing. That'd be a huge help. I'm not listening to all of them again, but if AI would, that'd be a huge help. So supposedly it has the ability to index. Okay, one more. Before I start I want to thank Hashem for the insight, blah blah blah blah, blah blah blah blah. I visit my old friend downtown Miami on a Thursday. I tell him I need to leave early because I know there'll be traffic. I say my goodbyes and leave at 3:30 and put on your shiur. See on Google Maps it's going to take me exactly one hour to get home. 17 miles. GPS tells me take 441 all the way to Miami Gardens and then get on 95 from there. I put on your shiur and head out. Now I'm someone with an excellent sense of direction, but we've all tried to beat Google Maps or Waze. Am I right? Before I'm supposed to make a right to get onto 95, I see a 95 express sign, so I head that way. I see express south from the right lane, but the left lane I see nothing, so I take that hoping it goes north. Well, jokes on me. Both lanes end up going south. If anyone has been south of 163rd street in the express lanes, you know there's no exit until Miami airport. I was now heading in the opposite direction of my house and the GPS changed from 20 minutes to 53 minutes and I just drove for 40 minutes. Oy vey. My wife who turned me onto the podcast can tell you I hate traffic, I hate making mistakes when driving. My initial reaction was to scream at myself and curse, but then I stopped and thought, why did I make this mistake? Rabbi Goldberg taught me anything, it's that I'm here for a reason. Well, two minutes before I made that wrong turn I switched from your shiur to listen to Drake. I quickly realized that Hashem was hinting at me I need an emunah workout. I quickly switched back to your shiur and enjoyed the rest of my car ride home. Without this mentality I would have been in a bad mood the rest of the day and my wife, who may hear this if you read it, would have to deal with my attitude the rest of the evening and would agree is exactly what would have happened. With emunah this was avoided. Thank you Hashem for my new mentality in life. Thank you again for all you do. Thank you Hashem for giving the koach to do it. And Drake, if you're listening, I'm sorry I took him away from you. Okay. All right. There's a lot more, but we'll stop there. They're all inspiring. But I want to come back to that question. If Hashem knows what's best for us and does what's best for us, then why would we try to get him to change his mind? Why would we daven and ask him? If we're meant to not have parnassa, we're meant to be single, we're meant to be barren, we're meant to to be chalila be sick, we're meant to any of the things that we daven to change, he's omnipotent, he's infinite, he's perfect, he knows what's best for us. Why are we asking him to do what's less best for us, less perfect for us, and do what we think from our finite, imperfect, limited perspective? We did discuss this in the past, but just a quick reminder and then we'll get back into this. It's an age-old question and many examine it and the Akeida, Akeidas Yitzchak and others bring the following answer and perspective. Davening, davening is not just appealing or asking or begging or groveling to Hashem. Davening is not trying to change Hashem's mind, davening is changing us. And when we change us, we're deserving of a new what's best for us. So the best for us before we daven might be whatever circumstance, whatever place, whatever problem, whatever struggle we're in. That was a wake-up call that stimulated, motivated, it was the catalyst to get us to daven, to change, to think, to grow, to be. So we mentioned here or in London, I don't remember, but if you ask people to put up their hand, you say, how many people went through a wonderful experience, a great simcha, a beautiful outcome, and it radically changed their lives? Very few if any hands go up. Ask people, how many have gone through a challenging time, a really challenging, difficult circumstance, and they had to dig deep and grow and persevere and be resilient and tenacious and came out a stronger, better, different, doesn't mean they're grateful that it happened, they still wish it hadn't, but they came out a different person. And when you ask that, many if not almost every hand in the room goes up. So which is the catalyst, the stimulus for growth? Not when everything goes smoothly and well and hunky-dory, it's when we go through challenges, it's when we confront friction, it's when we have to overcome obstacles that we dig deep and we find power and capacity and potential often we never knew we had, we never knew we had. And part of that overcoming the adversity, part of that fighting through those obstacles is digging deep to daven, sincerely and authentically, to recognize, to surrender, to submit, and to turn to Hashem that we need him, we need his help, and we can't do it without him, to the higher power. And when we do, we're different, we're changed, we're transformed. So who we were before we daven is meant to be radically different from who we are after. We come home from shul, our spouse should say to us, I don't recognize you, something's different. We say I just davened Shacharis. Yeah, but something's different. And the spouse should come home and say to the spouse at home, I don't recognize you. Yeah, I just said my Tehillim. Yeah, but you something's still. Totally different. Yeah, I'm now calm, tranquil, serene, I trust in Hashem, I've let go, I've let God, I've recognized whatever we're going through, wherever I am, we're not stuck, we're not lost, it's for a reason. That changes us. And when we're changed and when we're different, now we're deserving of Hashem bringing a new perspective on us. If we change our perspective on him, he'll change his perspective on us. So davening is not an exercise in changing his mind, davening is an attempt and an exercise to change ourselves. Now why is that so important? It's important for theological, philosophical reasons, it's important and critical to understand because we need to know what we're doing and meant to be doing when we do it. Hashem is immutable, he's unchangeable, he's permanent. He's omnipotent, he's infinite, he's everything. So the notion that we're going to change him or change his mind or persuade him, convince him, it's not who he is, it's not what we're doing. What we're doing is changing ourselves by talking to him. It's important. But it's also important because it changes what we bring to the experience of davening. We're not just mumbling a bunch of words so that we could put a checkmark next to the siddur or the Tehillim. We're not putting the dishes in the sink or straightening up or folding our tallis or or you know doing hand signals to have a conversation while we're in the middle of talking to Hashem because I just need to turn the pages and say I'm done. That's not what davening is anymore than you're on date night and you're supposed meant to be spending time with your spouse, with your child, with your friend and you're totally absent present, you're utterly distracted, you're not even involved, engaged, you're not sincere in the conversation. You're not changed by it. Have you gone for coffee with a friend where you walk you thought it was going to be casual, pedestrian, you're going to talk about everyday stuff, but you ended away walking away a changed person? Say, wow, that was deep, that was powerful, that was exactly what I needed. Every conversation with Hashem should be those moments with the best friend. TTH 9:50 AM talk to Hashem, not just from the siddur, but in life. In life. On this trip had several meetings working on our campus, believe me there's a lot of conversations with Hashem. What he wants, from whom he wants, what to say, afterwards how it went. There's a lot of conversations, a lot of TTH going on with with that activity. And with any activity, in any any goal, any dream, any ambition, any aim that we have, that we have in life. Talk to Hashem and it changes us. And you go from just like just like just like somebody I'm related to by marriage in that moment that I was about to be frustrated because I don't like amateur travel hour, and she caught it right away and before the pulse or blood pressure went up and before the reaction came out she said the reminder which was exactly what was needed. And we had plenty of time, so it wasn't an issue, but we're meant to be, the water bottle's where it's meant to be. Hakadosh Baruch Hu is talking to us, each act of davening is Hashem echoing in our ear saying, relax, I've got your back, I'm with you. And there are big things in life that it's not so simple to walk away and say, oh, and now I'm relaxed. No, there are things that we cry and things that we grieve, and we said this recently in a shiur and I got several emails from people who were grateful we said it. That being sad is not a contradiction to having emuna. Grieving at a loss is not a contradiction to having emuna. You know the Shulchan Aruch records based on the Gemara that the same way that one visits a mourner and says Hamakom yenachem eschem, may God comfort you, if someone sustained a great loss, if you know anyone in LA, if you know anyone in LA they could probably use a text or a phone call and a check-in, but if you know anyone in LA whose house was lost, possessions, everything they ever owned. Say Hamakom yenachem eschem. The Shulchan Aruch says one says to them the same words that we say to a mourner, may God comfort you. You don't call them and say, ah, your possessions are where they're meant to be, up in flames, gone forever, your picture albums, your antiques, your heirlooms, they're gone but have emuna, it was from Hashem, you weren't meant to have that house. Don't make that phone call. If that's what you're planning on saying, don't dial the number. That is not the message. The message is Hamakom yenachem eschem. We don't know why, I'm sure Hashem has a reason, please God you can come out stronger and bigger and better, but I know this hurts and it's hurting me with you, imo anochi betzara, nosei be'ol chaveiro, I'm with you. I'm feeling this pain, I'm here to help, Hamakom yenachem, may Hashem help you overcome, may you have the strength to endure the sadness you must be feeling, you appropriately are feeling, sadness is not a contradiction, grief is not a contradiction. Now if you are exceedingly sad because you had slow Wi-Fi on your flight, if you're so sad because they ran out of grinkern in the supermarket. Then then that's not an appropriate sadness. That's not a time you don't say Hamakom yenachem eschem. I heard that your phone battery died, Hamakom yenachem. You don't say Hamakom yenachem eschem because the because the laptop died. That is not an appropriate Hamakom yenachem. But the davening is not an experience of changing God, it's an experience of changing ourselves. And if we walked out of a tefillah of an experience of a conversation with Hashem and we're unchanged, then we need to rethink and revisit how we daven because that's what it's meant to do: to change us, not Him. And when we're changed, we're deserving of a new outcome. Have you not had a child misbehaves and the child is punished? He's punished. And the child deserves that punishment. But the child now comes and makes an appeal, and not some I'm sorry they don't even know what they're sorry for, they're just saying they're sorry because they want their device kind of back kind of sorry. But they have a conversation with you which makes you feel they get it. They genuinely feel bad about the way they spoke to you. They get it. It hurt them that they hurt you, and they feel bad and they want to make it right. And all you want to do is hug them and kiss them and say no problem, come out of your room, here's your device back. Ah what happened? Parent and experts will tell you that don't make a don't bluff. If you're not going to follow through it's the worst kind of parenting. And I think the answer is you're right. If the child hasn't changed, then you can't change from the accountability of the consequence you were holding them to. But if the child went into the room and thought about it and came back a different person and that was clear and convincing in the way they communicated, now they deserve a new outcome. And Hashem treats us exactly the same. Who we are brings about a certain what's right for us. But if we change who we are, we ask Him to rethink what is the best outcome for us and that is the process of tefillah. Emunah Bitachon page yud gimmel, page 13, Rav Dovid Abuchatzeira we're on the left hand column. דרגות רבות יש לה לאמונה. There are many levels to emunah. We gave away most of not all of our Kaffinate with Kavana cups. Going to order more. Today's giveaway turn the page our notebooks. We made these Modeh Ani thank you Hashem for a new day. Every day is a bright new day and a new beginning and a fresh start and whatever baggage and pekelach we had yesterday, leave it behind, turn the page a new day. So whatever notes, whatever journal, whatever diary, whatever you want to stick in your kid's backpack or your husband's briefcase, whatever note, rip it out of this, turn the page. Every day start the day Modeh Ani. Modeh Ani grateful am I rabbah emunasecha you have faith in me Hashem. Modeh Ani grateful am I you gave me a new day. Every minute's a new minute, every hour's a new hour, every day's a new day, every week's a new voche, a new week, every chodesh is a Rosh Chodesh a new month, every year's a Rosh Hashanah a new year. Judaism is all about new beginnings and fresh starts and reboot and new versions and whatever year version you're up to of you. And it's always fresh starts so that's why we produced these Modeh Ani thank you Hashem for a new day, turn the page. Don't get stuck in yesterday. Don't perseverate, don't get stuck, רשעים הם מלאים חרטה being stuck in the past, being stuck on the previous page is wickedness, is rasha, is resha. רשעים הם מלאים חרטה we learned here in Rav Dovid Abuchatzeira, רשעים הם מלאים חרטה we're not stuck in the past, we're not stuck with regret and remorse, we are not living then but we're living in the in the present. It's a new page every day so you got here a bin feel free to take one if you'd like to make a donation a shul could always use it so feel free to make a donation but even if you don't take one give it a gift keep it for yourself. דרגות רבות יש לה לאמונה עד שתמלא את ישותה וחיי הליכותיו. There are many levels to emunah until we fill our lives and our lifestyle. It's different than any other mitzvah there is. Every other mitzvah you discharge and you're done. You put on your tefillin you're done for the day. You shook the lulav and esrog you're done for the day. You lit the Shabbos candles enjoy the Shabbos meal you're done for the day. Other mitzvos are an act a one time you do them you're done. Emunah is not a mitzvah in the classic sense of you do it and you're done emunah is that's like saying marriage is I gave the ring I said הרי את מקודשת לי and I'm done. You're never done. Now you're just beginning. Now that you're married it is a state of being. It is an identity. It is a lifestyle. It is a perspective. It is a feeling. That's what marriage that's what love that's what life all are. Not I'm done. I told you the the old joke or the old story halevai it was a joke of the yungerman the young man who got married and he's now almost a year into marriage and the wife goes to meet with the Rebbe to complain you know he never says I love you. He never says I love you. So the Rebbe meets with him and he says you're not affectionate verbally affectionate. You apply his lamdus. I said it once and I didn't cancel it. So why do I have to repeat it? Marriage is not lamdus. It's life, it's love, it's a way of being, it's a state of mind, it's a perspective, it's a feeling that fills your heart, it's an identity, it's an awareness that you're always carrying. A healthy, loving, beautiful marriage, as you live your day, you're not living it only for yourself, you're living it in mind how you'll share it later. What advice, what support, what love, what nachas or pride you'll give the other, you're already living it not as a person, you're living it together as you'll share it later. If you're married and in love and in a healthy marriage, you never like to go on trips by yourself. You don't want to have to report on it and describe it later. You want to experience everything that there is in life, you want to experience it, you're only whole and experiencing it as a whole when you experience it together. And I'll give you many more examples of a healthy marriage, of an ideal marriage, of the marriage that we aspire to, and even those who have it sometimes don't have it always, and there's always more work to be done, but that's the healthy marriage, is there's always this awareness. There's a check-in, there's a text, there's a bid for connection, there's a how are you, there's a hey, there's a what's going on, tell me about your day. There's that constant, incomplete without you, you complete me, and my whole day and my life are only complete when we experience it together. And that's what emuna is with Hashem. There's not, I said Shacharis in the morning and I'll come back at Mincha and in between, I went to the gym and I went to work and I went for lunch and I did some shopping and you know I'll come back later. That's not a relationship with Hashem. The relationship with Hashem tonight's Behind the Bima I don't know if you listened last week, it was really worthwhile, it's not too late, it doesn't expire, you can catch up whenever you want, but Rabbi David Aaron of Isralight Orayta was last week and he speaks to the depths of the neshama and what a real relationship with Hashem is. I told you last week how Judaism needs a rebrand. Judaism is not about fear and guilt and the Holocaust, which is what most people associate. I mentioned this last week. He says, you know Christianity people think is all about forgiveness and joy and love. And they think that Buddhism is all about spirituality. And Judaism is about guilt and death and dying and anti-Semitism and the Holocaust. When really those things originated in Judaism and Judaism is the source of all those things, it's well worthwhile to listen. And tonight's Behind the Bima is also well worthwhile. Rabbi Yaakov Klein, a young man now in London, was in Eretz Yisrael, who is dedicating his life to spreading Pnimiyus HaTorah, these notions that we're talking about right now. That emuna's not about a checkmark, emuna's not I put on tefillin, I lit the candles, I did the daf, I gave the tzedaka in the pushka, I'm done, anymore than marriage would be I said good morning, I said I love you, now I went to work, I'm done. And I'll check back in at night, I'll have to repeat those things again and then we'll do it no, just like in marriages as I go to work, there's a bid for connection, there's a text in the middle of the day for no reason, hey thinking about you, hey what's going on, hey how did that thing go, hey I'm experiencing this wanting to share it with you later. Emuna also is I'm going into the boardroom, I'm negotiating the deal, please Hashem, thank you Hashem, why not Hashem, I'm protesting to you Hashem. It's not a one-time thing. It is, listen to his words, ad shetemale yeshuso, your yeshus means your existence, chayav of your life, vehalichosav and your journeys, your derech, your trip, your journey through life. It's your everything, it's your everything. מוצאים אנו את הדברים בתורתנו הקדושה בעת קריאת ים סוף. When we find this and we see this in our Torah HaKedosha at the splitting of the sea, ויושע ה' ביום ההוא וירא ישראל את מצרים וירא ישראל את היד הגדולה וייראו העם את ה' ויאמינו בה' ובמשה עבדו. We said in davening this morning, we say every day, vayosha Hashem, Hashem saved us on that day, God saw Mitzrayim, sorry, the Jewish people, וירא ישראל את מצרים. וירא ישראל את היד הגדולה, then they saw God's great hand, וייראו העם את ה' and they had awe, they saw, they feared Hashem, ויאמינו בה' ובמשה עבדו and they believed in God and Moshe his loyal servant. There's a lot of questions on this. We say it every day but we never ask. Did we just equate Moshe and God? They had faith in God and Moshe? Whoa, that sounds dangerous, slippery slope, that sounds like other religions, faith in God and, there's no and, there's faith in God period, exclamation point, end of sentence, done. What do you mean u? U? u v'Moshe avdo. And, in Moshe his servant. Okay, leave that for a second. But also, what do you mean now? Now standing opposite the sea, now? I love when emuna and parsha and siddur snippets and smichus, I love when it all comes together. So we're reading Parshas Vayeira, we're reading the makkos, we're going to be reading in a couple weeks Krias Yam Suf, and before you know it, it's a good thing you're sitting down, it's going to be Pesach. So we're preparing, we're preparing. ויש להבין ולהעמיק בכוונת הכתוב זה וכי עתה אך עתה באו לאמונה הלא כבר בהיותם במצרים נאמר ויאמן העם? They didn't have emuna in Mitzrayim? Only now standing opposite the sea, only now when it split and they were able to walk through it, only now can we say ויאמינו בהשם ובמשה עבדו? Only now do they have faith? What do you mean? In what merit were we redeemed from Egypt? It was Nashim Tzidkaniyos, it was in the merit of the righteous women. And what did the righteous women help us with? They said keep calm and carry on at TSA in Mitzrayim. Keep it moving. But what did the righteous women hold onto? Vaya'amen ha'am. No matter what was happening around us, back-breaking labor, the murder of our children, no matter what was going on they said keep the faith there will be a brighter day, this world is yet worth bringing children into. Hashem is going to turn this around, there is a future. So why do we say now Vaya'aminu, why only now opposite the sea? שלא נגאלו ישראל ממצרים אלא בשכר אמונה שנאמר ויאמן העם. We know even though they sunk to the 49th level of tumah, even though they were at almost hopeless and helpless, irredeemable, we didn't. We were caught right before we sunk to the lowest level. And what did we hold onto? What was the little we still had? Emuna. Emuna. Even though we were lost in so many other ways at least we still knew and believed and felt and came back to Hashem, to Hashem. אם כן מה הכתוב ללמדנו שאחר ויושע השם ביום ההוא שראו ישראל את מצרים מתים וראו את היד הגדולה אז הגיעו בני ישראל לאמונה בהשם ובמשה עבדו שנשמע מזה שעד עתה לא הגיעו לכך. Is the Torah implying that until now they didn't have emuna? It's only now opposite the sea that they did? What's going on, asks Rav David Abuhatzeira? Why now ויאמינו בהשם ובמשה עבדו? Leave aside the question of the u'v'Moshe avdo, but why now the emuna in Hashem as if until now they didn't have it? אולם כי יש לומר בבירור של דברים says the holy the heiliger Rav David Abuhatzeira, כי בעומק השגת האמונה נמצאים כמה מיני מדרגות. When it comes to emuna, there are many levels. האמונה הראשונה היא אמונה במוח. The first level emuna is the emuna of the brain, intellectual emuna, cognitive emuna, what we learned for so long from Rav Moshe Shapiro zt"l, what he would call not emuna what he would call emes. We learned the essay Emes v'Emuna. Anyone remember? Thank you so much for your kindness at least in saying that. I'm going to even go with that it's true. We learned with Rav Moshe Shapiro's essay Emes v'Emuna. Do you remember what he said? Emes, the emes doesn't need your help. The emes is that there's a God, he's a creator, he's the first cause, and it doesn't need he doesn't need you to believe in him to exist. Whether you believe in him or don't believe in him he exists he runs the world, that's the emes. That's the emes. Whether you believe in gravity or not, it will bring you down. Get it? What I did there? Whether you believe in gravity or not, gravity exists. Gravity doesn't need your help to believe in it. There's gravity, believe it or not, that's the emes. That's the emes. The world is round, not flat, believe it or not, that's the emes. That's the emes. Hashem exists that's the emes. What's emuna? Emuna is now employing that in your lifestyle, executing that in your life, living a life based on the fact that there's a God. So the first level is emuna bamoach, intellectual, cognitive, what Rav Moshe Shapiro would call not emuna but emes, emes. You do you study the Bible codes, you examine the evidence for God's existence, you analyze intellectually is there a God and you conclude yes. למעלה ממנו היא אמונת הלב. And then the next level up is emuna in the heart, דהיינו להמשיך את האמונה מידיעת המוח להרגישה בתוככי הלב שכל הרגשותיו מלאים באמונה בהשם. And now it's in the heart so that you filter and experience everything that happens emotionally to you through emuna. So you're about to rage about the water bottle, I wasn't going to rage. I wasn't going to get that angry. I don't get that angry. I don't get angry at all. I try not to. But a person's going to get angry about the water bottle in the bag and the emunah balev says whoa, whoa, whoa, we're meant to have this extra moment. She was meant to forget, we were meant to be together, we were meant to, it's okay. I forgot because I'm the professional traveler. Part of my job on the line at TSA is to say anyone have liquid in their bag, take it out, we're not spending time, do it now. So really it was my fault. I forgot to make the announcement. So emes is there's a God. But if the emes ends in shul and the second you walk out and you go to the boardroom, the operating room, and you go to whatever room, and you forget there's a God and you lose your cool, you get angry, you get arrogant, you get envious, and you forget there's a God who feers the velt, who runs the world, then emunah is only emunah stayed up here, it hasn't filtered to the heart. But if you experience moments of sadness and moments of joy and moments of frustration and moments of glee and it's all filtered through the prism of the heart of emunah bashem, thank you Hashem or I need you Hashem or why Hashem or where are you Hashem, but it's all experienced with Hashem in a conversation with Hashem. כי המרחק בין המוח והלב הוא כמו המרחק בין השמים והארץ says Rav David Abuhatzeira. The distance between the head and the heart is at least the same distance between the heaven and the earth. The farthest two things on this planet, the farthest distance between any two objects on this planet is the distance between our head and our heart. That's why we need Ozempic. I'm not saying that with any judgment. I'm saying that's a reality. That's why we need whatever other tools we need because we know what's wrong for us to eat, we know when we're full from eating it, we know we shouldn't lash out in anger, we know it's unhealthy to be jealous, we know so much. We have a PhD. We have an advanced degree, graduate degree, we're PhD experts in everything we do wrong. So why do we do it wrong? Why do we do it wrong? I have a PhD in waking up in the morning. Why do I have 17 snoozes? A PhD in eating right. Why do we eat wrong? A PhD in being a loving parent, calm and cool and collect. Why do I blow my cool? Because the distance between the head and the heart is the forever distance. That's why the Torah says that a soldier, Sefer Devarim, the Torah tells us a soldier, סח בין תפילין לתפילין, a soldier who speaks between the hand tfillin and the head tfillin, we send them home from war. Torah doesn't say it, Chazal darshun, who is the soldier? rach levav, sheyeish aveiros beyado, is the person who speaks between the hand tfillin and the, we put tfillin on the arm, we put tfillin on the head, and if somebody speaks in between when you're not supposed to interrupt, go home. Go home. That's what you go home for? If you violate Shabbos you could stay. But if you talk between putting on your tfillin you gotta go home. That's what you go home for? So I once suggested, I later found it in several sefarim, it means the following: You can't interrupt between the head and the heart, between the head and the hand, because what you know up here has to filter down to what you do. Because if you know something up here but it doesn't lead to your following the command, we can't have you in our army. If you can't follow the instruction, the direction, the command, if you know things up here but they don't lead to your doing them here, then you need to go home. So there's emunah in the head, next level, emunah in the heart. ואחר שזוכה להמשיך האמונה בעומק ליבו אזי יוסיף עוד להשפיע האמונה גם לכל האיברים שתהיה אמונת השם חדורה בכל איברי הגוף. And after you have the head and emunah in the head, intellectual, cognitive, emunah in the heart, you experience, absorb, filter everything, all emotion through emunah, then there's emunah in all the limbs of the body. לקיים מה שכתוב פסוק בתהילים כל עצמותיי תאמרנה השם מי כמוך. We say it Nishmas Shabbos morning. All of my bones scream out, Hashem there's no one like You. שיבינו כל איבריו שאין עוד מלבדו כי ידיעת המוח והלב אין בהם די כמו שרואים לפעמים כשמזדמן לאדם דבר מטיל אימה ואין אמונה עומדת לו להישאר במנוחת הנפש. What does it mean to have emunah in the rest of the limbs of your body? What does it mean? There's no actual emunah muscle that you can measure. It's not a muscle in your body. There's no BMI, body mass index, for emunah. So what does it mean emunah in the eivarim? Emunah in the head we understand, Bible codes, evidence of God's existence, it's the emes analyzing intellectually God's existence, the evidence for God's existence. Emunah in the heart we understand. Understand. Whether we're sad or happy, frustrated or flying in life, we experience it all through a conversation crediting Hashem, surrendering to Hashem, leaning on Hashem, we understand. What does it mean Emunah in the rest of the limbs of the body? What does that mean? What does that mean? אם עלה בידו להשריש האמונה בכל אברי הגוף אזי אין פחד ומורא שולט בו והוא שלו ובוטח. You know what it means? It means if you wore a heart monitor, a biometric monitor, that was monitoring your heartbeat, was monitoring your pulse, your blood pressure, your sweat glands, was monitoring all these biofeedback of the body, you know what it would measure and it would find? Calm and peace. Hishtavus, equanimity. It's all the same to me. Moshe Gersht's book. It would find that in the moment of the highest highs and the lowest lows, externally you have a smile or you have a tear, but internally there's an equilibrium, there's an equanimity. That internally there's an Emunah that doesn't get you too in either direction because you're experiencing it all that it's the hand of Hashem. Kol Atzmosai Tomarna, my whole being is experiencing that this is the will of Hashem, that is how I am responding, that is how I am experiencing, that is what this is all about. It doesn't mean I don't get sad or happy, grieve or celebrate, those are appropriate reactions. Imagine you're at your child's wedding and you're sitting on the side with a very still face and someone walks up to you and says, what's the matter? Aren't you happy? And you say, well I went to the Emunah shiur and I'm supposed to just be even keel, tranquil. So yes, I'm happy, can't you tell? No, huge smile ear to ear, your feet are moving, you can't stop dancing, you're having the time of your life, but inside you realize that that's from Hashem. He orchestrated this miracle of this marriage. And chalila a person is sitting shiva, it doesn't mean that they're sitting with a smile and you say, aren't you sad? This was a tragic loss. Well I went to the Emunah shiur and equanimity and it's all the same to me and I'm in equilibrium and my whole body is demonstrating Emunah. No, cry a tear, there's a loss, grieve, feel the pain, lean into it. But as you experience it, the highs aren't too high, the lows aren't too low because it is all from Hashem. Kol Atzmosai Tomarna. You know those dramatic people that everything is like melodrama? Everything is drama, drama, drama. Big highs and big lows and a big drama out of everything. That's not what the Torah's asking of us. The Torah is a no-drama lifestyle. Emunah, Kol Atzmosai Tomarna is eliminate the drama from life. Eliminate the drama from life. That's what the Torah's asking us. Now again, you'll notice we just talked about madregos, dargos. There are levels. So when we're working on Emunah and we're adopting and absorbing and we're turning Emunah from a one-time mitzvah check to a marriage, an ongoing awareness, consciousness, lifestyle, we're starting at the low level and we're building up. Some people are at emes and they struggle applying emes to the Emunah. Some people have emes and the Emunah of the heart and it's hard to get the Emunah into the limbs. This isn't a judgment or an expectation or a demand that from day one we're going to be there. But if we're working on this together then we're working on it with an eye towards and an effort towards getting to that level and getting to that place where there's zero drama. Eliminate the drama. No drama. No drama. You might come home and say, I had a really hard day at work, we've got this challenge, we became aware of this major setback and we've got to overcome it, we're going to figure it out. And yeah, I'm thinking about it, it's making me a little bit anxious, I'm a little bit worried about it, but there's no drama around it because it's all from Hashem. If He wants us to figure it out, we'll figure it out, if He doesn't, it's not meant to be, and so yes I have the natural attitudes towards it but there's no drama. And there's also no drama to burst through the door and top of the happiest mood ever. Relax. What happened? Unbelievable! And you know what happens to people who live the drama, the high highs? They crash and burn. And the low lows, then they get manic. And that's with no judgment, not a healthy way of being. We have names for those disorders for people who have highs that are too high and lows that are too low and we medicate and regulate and support and employ professional help in order to create a greater equanimity, equilibrium, to not have the highs be so high and the lows so low. Emunah should eliminate drama. Emunah in the avarim, the Emunah in the limbs, should eliminate the drama. No drama. No drama. Yes, there can be sadness and yes, there can be happiness. Yes, there is natural human emotion. I'm not talking about don't feel. We shouldn't transform ourselves into non-feeling, unfeeling robots. That's not emunah, that's absurd. Emunah is as we feel, it's without the drama. It's without the drama that surrounds so many people, who often the drama is to seek attention, the drama is a coping mechanism with a lot of fear, anxiety. No drama. Drama-free zone. Maybe that's the next emunah sticker for the front door of the house. A drama-free zone. Drama-free kitchen, drama-free dining room table. This is a drama-free carpool, drama-free. Feel and express and communicate, but no drama. We didn't get to the answer. So why did it take to Krias Yam Suf vaya'aminu ba'Hashem? Ai, it was only in the merit of emunah that we got out of Mitzrayim. So only now ויאמינו בה' ובמשה עבדו? Now we can endorse and now we can confidently state vaya'aminu ba'Hashem? And they didn't before? We'll pick up with it next week. Have a great week. בשורות טובות ישועות ונחמות. Please stay for all Sefer Tehillim.
