Transcript
Boker tov, good morning, and Chodesh Tov, a good Chodesh, and a freilichen Chanukah, and a gut erev Shabbos, it's Wednesday you could say gut erev Shabbos, every greeting that we have, every Jewish greeting that we have. So it should be besuros tovos, we should hear good news please G-d. You know, it's the Gregorian New Year, which for us in some ways should be meaningless because we have our own New Year, it's called Rosh Hashanah, and of course the contrast between the two occurred to me, everyone's wishing me a happy New Year, happy New Year, happy New Year out in the world, and it occurred to me that on Rosh Hashanah we don't wish people a happy New Year, we wish them a Shana Tova, a good year. It's an interesting contrast between that blessing being may you be happy versus may it be good. Happiness is not necessarily a Jewish aspiration or a Jewish blessing. I don't know that we ever felt entitled to be happy or searched for happiness or pursued happiness. If you pursue goodness, then you find happiness. So we wish, maybe I'm being very rabbinic and darshening up a little too much here, but when you wish people good, so if you have good, you find happiness. But if you wish people happy, then it's often elusive and you're pursuing it, you don't have good and you don't have happy. So it should be a good, a good Gregorian New Year. Said Rav Yaakov Kamenetsky, the great Rosh Yeshiva, Rav Yaakov zatzal, would turn to his students and he'd say, "nu, what resolution are you making?" They said, "Rebbe, it's not Rosh Hashanah, it's just a secular New Year. We don't hold of that." So Rav Yaakov said, "is it possible that the whole world is making resolutions and you're not?" Whether you hold of it or not, the whole world's busy making resolutions that they won't keep and the membership will be canceled in a month, but the whole world's making resolutions. Could it be the whole world's making resolutions and we're not? So sometimes you don't have to buy into something to be inspired by it and to use it to propel us to take on a big practice, to be inspired. Our Emunah Series is jointly sponsored by Dr. Zavi and Belah Morgan in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut, in memory of Dr. Ellen Chanzer, very grateful as always to the Morgans for their tremendous, tremendous generosity. He did not write in an email, but if you missed last Shabbos afternoon the conversation with Alex Clare, you missed something, a story of Hashgacha Pratis that was absolutely extraordinary. I'm not going to repeat the whole thing, he's been on many podcasts, you could listen there, and we don't have the time and I can't do it justice in his words. But the story of what he gave up, an incredible career touring with the most famous people because he began to keep Shabbos and Pesach, his record label cut him, he had no money and he owed his band, he was deeply in debt. He went to meet with his rabbi who he was complaining, "this is my, this is my reward? I'm starting to keep Shabbos and I'm losing my whole livelihood and I'm losing my future career?" And the rabbi said, "you're a modern day Avraham Avinu. Just like Avraham sacrificed his whole future when Hashem told him to bind his son Yitzchak and he was willing to do it and he was prepared to sacrifice his whole future and Hashem said don't worry, I'll make it worth your while, you'll be blessed." Hashem, so so his Rebbe told him, "just stick tight." And the rest of the story, Microsoft was making a commercial for a product it barely ever sold but needed a song and hired someone to find the song, and when the person made their way to LA, they stopped at a friend's house first, and that friend was one of the hundred people in America who had bought Alex Clare's album and was playing it right when he stopped by. And he heard the song and said, "what's that and who's that?" And then he decided to bring that song to Microsoft who loved it and said, "do you have the rights to it?" He said, "absolutely," but he didn't. He had to track down Alex Clare who by then was learning in Yeshiva in Yerushalayim, had forgotten about it, had given up on his career essentially. And he said, "sure, you can have the rights to that song." And fast forward, I'm leaving out a lot of details, but fast forward, lo and behold, he gave up the rights to the song, Microsoft put the commercial everywhere, people heard it, didn't really care about the product, Internet Explorer I think it was, but but loved the song. It was right when Shazam came out, which was an app that you could hear a song and find out more about who produced it and download the album. And about five six months later he's sitting learning in Yeshiva when he gets a call on the pay phone because he was tracked down by a radio station in Germany who says, "you need to come tomorrow." He said, "why?" They said, "because you're number one in Germany. Your album has sold, this song is number one." It went to number three in the UK and number seven in America and it blew up and went viral and continues to this day to have a million downloads a month and provide for his parnassa. And his Rebbe was right. He was prepared to sacrifice it all for a relationship with Hashem to keep Shabbos and Hashem turned to him and said, "you won't be sacrificing anything, I'll take care of you." And the whole story, again, I'm not doing it justice, a lot more details, but it was an incredible conversation and it was a great Shabbos with him. Let me share a couple emails and then we'll dive back into our text Emunah u'Bitachon of Rav David Abuchatzeira shlita. We're never lost, we're never lost, and we're never late. We are always where we're meant to be. אכן יש ה' במקום הזה ואנכי לא ידעתי. Hashem is bamakom hazeh. Wherever we are is where we're meant to be. Hashem is in that place and now what's our mission? And as we spoke about at length last week, that is not a perspective that we impose on others. You don't tell someone a hostage in a tunnel that's where you're meant to be. Chalila. You don't tell someone in a hospital bed that's where you're meant to be. You don't tell someone waiting and longing to be married that's where you're meant to be. That's not something we impose on others, but it's how we live for ourselves. When it comes to others, you're not meant to be there and I'm going to get you out. When it comes to ourselves, whatever wherever we are after all of our efforts, it must be that's where we're meant to be. Not to ruin the ending, but this isn't one of those stories where everything worked out. I have a friend visiting South Africa who kindly offered to bring back some goodies back to Israel for me. Like anyone who made aliyah, I jumped at the opportunity to restock some of my favorite items from home, including supplements I can only get there. I had organized everything and paid extra courier fees to ensure my parcel of supplements would arrive where she was staying ahead of her departure date. I usually follow up on deliveries. With all the chagim and holidays, I didn't check again assuming as always the courier would deliver as per usual. Then today I received an image from my friend with the items she received to bring back for me, and lo and behold, my supplements were missing. I quickly sent off an email to try and get them delivered today, but after much back and forth, it wasn't possible. I recognized this was just one of those things, and me getting upset about it was not going to change anything. That's the truth always about anger. Anger doesn't make supplements arrive. Anger doesn't make the package come. Anger doesn't make the red light turn green or the flight leave on time or the person behave the way you want. All anger does is compromise your mental health, physical health, your happiness, and push away the people around us. Each of the emails I wrote to the company was polite. In the past, perhaps I would have been more curt and rude, and I kept saying to myself, it is out of my hands. If it's meant to be, it will happen. If not, please God there'll be someone else coming at some stage who could bring them. I can't emphasize enough how listening to the podcast and learning from the teachings gave me the ability to deal calmly with this. After much back and forth on email with maintaining a calm emuna-focused approach, customer support lady apologized she couldn't help me in time, refunded me the courier fees which I did not ask for, and although I will not be getting the full order, I am grateful I was able to deal with this in such a stress-free way. Thanks as always for the shiurim. May we see a speedy return of the hostages and our soldiers be safe, warm, and dry. Amen, amen. Simple, insignificant. I don't mean to knock her supplements not arriving as insignificant. I think she would probably agree. The point is just again, the more we incorporate and live and apply emuna in our lives, the more it empowers us to stay calm and to maintain our serenity and our peace and our relationships because the opposite won't achieve any result, it will only sacrifice and compromise it. It will only sacrifice and compromise it. Okay. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, I'm typing this email on my phone at Reagan-National Airport on my way home from what was unfortunately a most disappointing trip. I'm a lawyer in my early 30s. In my early 20s, I seriously considered joining law enforcement, but for various reasons, I decided to become a lawyer instead. From a young age, like many others, I was fascinated by police work and law enforcement. I think he gave up on giving a shepherd, I guess. That was last week. I strongly believe in frum people joining law enforcement at all levels, local, state, or federal. It's an excellent way to contribute to public service and improve and develop personally, mentally, and physically and teach valuable skills like using firearms and handling dangerous situations. On a more practical level, it's politically important for the safety of Jewish and frum communities. Thankfully more and more frum individuals have been joining law enforcement and succeeding. That said, many agencies are extremely selective. They have rigorous standards and the government is notoriously slow in its hiring process. Just getting an interview can take months or even years. For months, I've been physically training, preparing for the day I would get the call. I still have several active and pending applications. When the agency I most desired flew me down for testing, I was ecstatic. They flew me in the night before the exam. This was the first time I'd been away from my family since getting married five years ago. The next morning, the schedule was packed with tests and an interview. If I succeeded in those stages, the day would conclude with the physical fitness test: running, push-ups, sit-ups, followed by a polygraph exam the next day. Unfortunately, I was informed I wouldn't need to take the physical exam. I had a hunch I hadn't performed well enough earlier, so I wasn't completely shocked. Still, it stung. I trained for months for that physical exam and I didn't even get the chance to take it. I called my wife and we immediately recognized that it is a quote, Rabbi Goldberg living with emuna moment with a TM, trademark. I reminded myself this wasn't what Hashem wanted for me, at least not right now. I told her I believe I could excel if given another shot, but I don't know if or when that opportunity will come. If Hashem wills it, I hope it happens. Later that evening, I decided to at least try to make it to Maariv, but as I approached my rental car, I discovered the tire... was completely flat. I couldn't help but laugh. It was a cherry on top. Candidates are automatically booked for three nights and two days, so pass or fail I was stuck in Maryland at the training grounds until my flight the following evening. The next morning I found the closest shacharis at 7:00 AM. Normally, that's not too early for me, but after the day I had, it felt unnecessarily early. Still, I went. When I arrived, I found the outer gate locked. Just then a man wearing his tallis and tefillin came to unlock it and said, "Are you a kohen?" "Yes," I replied, and he said... and I asked, "Am I the only one?" He nodded with a smile and replied, "Yes." I smiled and chuckled to myself. I knew at that moment, I was meant to be there. I entered the shul and they barely had a minyan. I was by far the youngest person in the room. I could tell they were happy to see a new face. I don't know why Hashem didn't orchestrate things so I could pass all the tests and still make it to shul as the kohen, but that's not how it works. I'm still hopeful this position or one of the other top roles I'm pursuing will eventually work out. For now, I'll hold on to this emuna moment and the story of being the kohen tenth man for a minyan in Maryland. PS, please tell Ben Shapiro to be my best friend. I'll be sure to let him know. But you know, much better than, no offense, Ben Shapiro, Hashem is your best friend. And what's better than that? And no one needs me to tell them, tell Hashem to do that. Again, more significant, this person trained and dreams and worked hard and wants it, and I share these emails with you, I read them for myself, because the next time we're in a hard situation, the next time we're disappointed, the next time we're frustrated, the next time we're tempted to get angry, the next time something doesn't work out the way we drew it up, that trademark, that living with emuna moment is our chance to rise to the occasion. It's our test. It's our call to action. Maybe it's our mini akeidas yitzchak. And how lucky we are that it's not about giving up our whole career, God forbid, our child. Maybe it's something smaller. And yet, when we rise to that occasion, we are zoche, we merit such incredible blessing. I'm in awe. Insignificant maybe, the people around him and in his life won't even know it. But he trained, he worked hard, he dreamt, and instead of being disappointed, instead of being depressed, instead of spiraling down, instead of saying, "minyan? maariv shacharis? Forget you, God, you forgot me." Wow, in that moment he says, "That's not where I'm meant to be, that's not what I'm meant to be doing, and I'm so grateful Hashem will put me where I'm supposed to go." And I'm so blown away, I'm so impressed by that. Let me read one more. We're going up in levels of consequence. I don't mean to minimize anyone else's emails or what they're going through, but just for our own experience or inspiration. Hi Rabbi Goldberg, every message is sent at the right time. Just like I was so grateful for you being Hashem's shliach in another case, I am very grateful this week. Yesterday I went for my first prenatal appointment. After finishing the scans they found no heartbeat. While I was waiting to speak to the doctor I said to Hashem, "Thank you for this act of din, of judgment, justice, which is wrapped in rachamim, compassion. I know this could have ended far worse due to my history, and Hashem, you heard my tefillos that if it wasn't meant to be for us to have another child right now, it should be without too much pain and tzar." When I woke up this morning, I had in mind what you said last week about the bracha שעשה לי כל צרכי. Hashem does for us all of our needs. I took pause and really thought about how much Hashem has bestowed upon us, and we have everything we need. We're so blessed in our lives and Hashem had to say no right now, but I'm grateful for when and how he chose to say no. There's definitely sadness, and Hashem's timing with Chanukah is making it easier for me and my husband to choose happiness and focus on all the light in our lives. Thank you for being Hashem's shliach once again. It's been a journey working on my relationship with Hashem. You've helped to bring him into the forefront. Now with this bump in the road, you've given me the tools to approach it head on and hopefully become even closer to Hashem. Remember, he's in control and we're never lacking. שעשה לי כל צרכי. We have whatever we're meant to have and whatever we need, by definition, שעשה לי כל צרכי. Wow. It's a wow moment. To leave a doctor's office with no heartbeat and to say, "Well, at least thank you Hashem for letting me know this earlier or in this way without further pain, and if it's not meant to be right now, I accept that with a full heart, and we'll look at the light, not at the dark. We'll look at what we have, not at what's missing. We'll look at the good that's there and not what we feel as the bad." Sad. Sad. As we've shared countless times in this shiur, to deny or suppress or pretend we're not sad is to do a disservice to ourselves and our experience and our emotions and is unhelpful. All it will do is it will bottle it up and it will blow up later. Lean in, be sad, cry a tear. There's grieving, there's mourning, there's bereavement. We believe in that. But against a backdrop and a foundation of, within my sadness and within my sorrow, there's a sense of there's a Hashem, there's a plan, there's a reason, it makes sense, and for whatever reason right now. And then I turn and I daven and I beg and I storm the heavens, Hashem, give her a healthy baby and let the shidduchim arrive with someone else and let him break into law enforcement if that's where he's meant to be, because who knows if Hashem understands what would happen if he were in law enforcement for his family that he hasn't left in five years until then. Hashem knows best. But we daven, of course we daven, we want to break through, we want to take our initiative, we want things to be based on our finite limited perspective the way we think is best. But with all that in the end we say Hashem, if you conclude differently, if you have a different plan, then I am where I'm meant to be. Then I am where I'm meant to be, if that is the end. Achashmonaim we're almost at the height of Chanukah tonight tomorrow זאת חנוכה מאת השם היתה זאת, this is the end the Zos, the brightest lights, brightest lights, we're almost there. Tonight's the last night. Savor the moment. Stick around. Turn off your phone. Put it on airplane mode. The latkes, the donuts, the dreidel, the concerts, the toys, the gifts, wait, sit and stare, the lights are brightest, they're burning the brightest tonight. This world has so much darkness and we need that light so desperately and so badly and there are people with such darkness we want and we pray for light in their lives and in ours. Look at that light, savor that light, ingest that light, be transformed by that light, be that light. See in that light the blessings of your life that are often right under our nose that we've neglected and ignored and forgotten about and those lights are right there, they're right there, they're right there, they're right there. And be that light for someone else. We invited someone over who lit candles with us last night who mentioned they hadn't gotten a Happy Chanukah from anyone, they hadn't gotten a gift and this was their only Chanukah experience. If you're lighting candles with anyone else, let that light see that blessing in your life. Think of someone who might be lighting alone and invite them to light with you this last night. Text them, reach out to them, call them. As we wrote about this week, the research, the studies that show eight minutes can save a person's life. Eight minutes can give somebody eight minutes with a friend, eight minutes with a friend can push away and prevent depression, anxiety, clinical things. Eight minutes. Who doesn't have eight minutes in these eight nights? Eight minutes. This is the last night, the last chance. And if Chanukah's over when you're listening to this, you're still allowed to call someone. Go wish them a Gut Shabbos or Gut Chodesh, a Gut Year, a Gut Day, a Gut Hour, a Gut Minute, a Gut Moment. You're still allowed to. You're still allowed to. It can make all the difference in a person's life. So you light those candles, they're burning the brightest, eight candles tonight. See the blessing that's under our nose. If these people, if someone could leave a doctor's office with no heartbeat and still see and find and search for the blessing and choose, because it's not an emotion, it's a decision, choose the happiness, then we can as well. It transforms our lives. We're on page Yud Beis, Emuna u'Vitachon Rav David Abuhatzeira. And this little chapter is Tefila l'Hasagas Emuna, the idea paradoxically you gotta pray for faith. Pray for faith? Who are you praying to faith, to whom are we praying for faith? It takes faith to pray. So what does it mean to pray for faith? It seems, it seems counterintuitive or paradoxical or circular. So Rav David Abuhatzeira is quoting from Tzaddikim. This was David HaMelech. David HaMelech, השם רועי לא אחסר, Hashem is my shepherd I shall not lack. השם רועי לא אחסר is similar to שעשה לי כל צרכי. God, you prepare all of my needs, whatever I have is what I need. I want more, I'm working for more, you want me to take initiative for more, but שעשה לי כל צרכי, whatever I have is what I need, you prepare all my needs. Hashem Ro'i, you are my shepherd, Lo Echsar, I'm not lacking anything. I lack nothing. But says Rav David Abuhatzeira quoting Rav Mordechai Me'Neshkhiz says no, David HaMelech was saying something different. השם רועי לא אחסר, may I never be lacking in knowing God you're my shepherd. I want to walk around all the time knowing you're my shepherd. May I never be lacking in knowing you're my shepherd. In a doctor's office, in a boardroom, in the supermarket, next to my candles, delayed in an airport, wherever, whenever, השם רועי לא אחסר, may I never be lacking in knowing Hashem Ro'i that you are my, that you are my shepherd. I'll repeat a story I've shared several times from Mori v'Rabi Rav Weinberger quotes it he first read it in a Reader's Digest years ago. Still they still come out with Reader's Digest? Who knows. So it told the story of a poetry reading contest. You remember the story? I'm going to repeat it anyway because it bears repeating. The poetry reading contest, people submitted early, they practiced and it came for the big contest, the big competition that day, the people had registered and submitted. at the end of the contest right after the last contestant had performed an old man with a cane walked up to the judges and said I'd like to read a piece of poetry. They said I'm sorry you didn't register you're not included he said please. They decided for this old man they would indulge him they would allow it they would let him. So they let him read. What did he choose? Psalm 23. Kapitel Chaf Gimmel. And he gets up and he reads a Psalm of David the Lord is my shepherd I shall not lack though God cause me to lie down in lost pastures and so on and so forth. He reads כ"ג קפיטל כ"ג. And the judges convene and they're blown away and unanimously they award him the winner of this poetry reading contest. This young man this young man who had chosen the same reading storms up to the old man and he says to him I don't understand. I had a coach I had a trainer I've practiced since I'm young I submitted to this contest early I worked hard and I got ready I got up and I read it. How did you win? Last minute you came you decided the last moment to read it? How why did you win? How did you beat me? So the old man turned to him and he said you read a poem about a shepherd. I know the shepherd. You read a poem about a shepherd. I know the shepherd. I know the shepherd. So that's why. So that's why. השם רועי לא אחסר. The Lord is my shepherd I shall not lack. Hashem you're my shepherd lo echsar may I never stop knowing you're my shepherd. You're shepherding me through life. Sometimes I veer off the path you get me back on the path. Last week we spoke about Moshe and the little lamb that he put on his shoulders. Let me carry you you're tired you're thirsty. Hashem says let me carry you you're tired you're thirsty you're lost. It's great. If you're on the path and you're with the herd and you're doing great Hashem says keep going. If we veer off Hashem says whoa whoa whoa wait you're about to turn off the path. Gives us a little nudge gives us a little patch gives us a little redirect get back on the path. Sometimes we veer all the way off the path and he says come let me carry you on my shoulders and bring you back. Let me take you back on the path back on the derech. Hashem Ro'i Hashem you're my shepherd lo echsar may I never stop knowing that you're my shepherd. Even if I feel I'm tempted to feel I'm challenged to feel all alone in a doctor's office with a disappointment. Where are you? How could you? Why would you? No lo echsar may I never ever feel lacking. The Derech who peirush beno in Zera Kodesh. Then the Heilige Rupshitzer says in the Zera Kodesh it's a pasuk. ויעתר יצחק להשם לנוכח אשתו. We read a couple of weeks ago that when Yitzchak and Rivka were barren suffering waiting for a child Yitzchak davens to Hashem lenochach ishto opposite his wife. שכל ימיו היה יצחק מתפלל יצחק להשם. All his life Yitzchak would daven. U'mah haysa tefillaso? LaHashem lenochach ishto. אשתו היא כנסת ישראל. We have a tradition that ishto is the Jewish people right? The Dodd and the Raya Shir HaShirim God and the Jewish people have a loving a marriage. Ishto is the Jewish people. והדבר הזה ביקש יצחק אבינו שיהיה השם תמיד לנוכח עיני כנסת ישראל. ויעתר יצחק להשם לנוכח אשתו. What was Yitzchak's tefillah? May Hashem always be opposite the Jewish people. Me wherever we go in life whatever we're experiencing in life whatever we need in life whatever joy whatever happiness don't forget Hashem. Whatever low whatever challenge don't forget Hashem. What was Yitzchak's tefillah? His tefillah was laHashem Vaye'etar Yitzchak. Yitzchak davened. What was the tefillah? Hashem lenochach ishto. Hashem always be opposite the Jewish people. ובתפילתו פעל שיוכל כל איש מזרע בני ישראל להתחזק ולהחזיק עצמו באמונת אומן. And with his tefillah he inspired and he strengthened us that no matter where no matter what no matter when whatever's happening in our life we can lean on we can rely on we can turn to we can be supported by we can find him. ובוודאי כאשר יתחנן אדם על כך בכל לבו שיזכה לחיות בצל אמונת השם לחיות חיים עליונים של הסתכלות מרוממת בכל צד ושעל הרי שמתעוררת תפילתו של יצחק תפילת יצחק אבינו והוא המסייע שתתקבל לרחמים ולרצון. Kadosh Baruch Hu Yitzchak implanted in us Yitzchak put in our DNA that capacity no matter what we're going through in life. And that's what it means to daven that we can daven. Sometimes a person is going through a hard thing they've experienced a loss. And then a loss on top of that loss would be a loss of a relationship with Hashem. Martin Judovits alav hashalom our beloved Martin Judovits we miss Martin. Martin one of the founders one of the heroes one of the... builders of our community. Very, very special man. A Holocaust survivor. On several occasions I had the chance to interview him on Yom HaShoah for children of our community, Yom HaShoah program. And privately we had an incredibly close relationship. And I asked him, Martin! He lost everything, his whole family in Dej. He was an einekel of the Dejer Rav, of the Mareh Yechezkel. You see the pictures he shared in the back of his wonderful memoir, as a little Chassidishe boy. He lost his whole world, he lost his whole family, he lost everything, but he never lost his faith. A founder of our community, he was a pillar, a fixture in our davening, in building a community, in his emunah and his bitachon. How, I asked him. How could you do it? You weren't angry? How did you maintain your faith? And I'll never forget what he answered. You can probably find it online, I'm sure it's on YouTube, one of these interviews. And he said, he said, I had lost so much. I lost my mother, I lost my father, I lost my siblings, I lost my family, I lost my community. I had already lost both my parents, why should I choose to lose my Father in heaven too? It was hard enough to live life without my physical parents, how would I manage without my Heavenly Father? So he made the choice, with whatever feelings he had and had to work through, which were undeniable for anyone who went through what he went through, he made the choice that if it was hard enough to live and navigate without his physical father, why would he try to live and navigate without his Avinu Shebashamayim, his Father in shamayim? Why would he? Why would he? So he maintained his faith in Hashem because he had lost so much, why would he want to lose Hashem too? So there is this precedent, Yitzchak teaches, Yitzchak planted that DNA in us, we all have that ability when going through a hard time to daven to Hashem, Hashem, I don't see You right now and I don't feel You right now and I don't feel Your love for me and I don't feel close to You, but I'm asking You, let me feel it, because it will be harder without You. So I'm davening to You Hashem, I'm davening to You that I want to daven to You. I'm davening to You that I believe in You. I'm davening to You that You make Yourself known to me, that I can feel You in my life. So very counterintuitively and paradoxically, we have a precedent from Yitzchak Avinu, and we have a notion and an idea to daven that we can daven, to daven that we have faith. It sounds silly but it's not. To turn to Hashem to ask Him for help to see Hashem, to feel Hashem, to want to be close to Hashem. How do we acquire this emunah, this faith? How do we grow in it? Next chapter. אמונה בהשם אינה באה לאדם בנקל. Faith does not come easily. You think it should, you go to the shiur and you read these emails, if you listen to - and I have a whole folder of these emails in my email, online and offline, in hard times go back and read them, and you read this and you say, why in the world would anyone live without it? How do you possibly have what it takes to overcome whatever challenges in life without it? Why would you live without it? These emails all end with 'I maintained my cool, my calm, my connection to the people around me with Hashem, even though it was difficult and it was challenging and nonetheless.' Why wouldn't you? But it's not easy. You know why? Because when things don't go your way, it's hard. When you don't see Him or feel Him, or when things are incredibly happy and successful, you forget about Him. That's also an enormous danger. When you're riding atop of the world and everything's great and everything's going your way, how easy is it? How easy is it to forget it was Him? The things that we davened for yesterday that came true today, do we thank Him for tomorrow, or do we just move on to the next list of things that we need? So important. We're getting up to in Siddur snippets, we'll get back after Chanukah, we're up to Modim. Modim is my favorite. Modim is one of the most important. Modim - thankful. To be mindful and conscious, to pause and to list and to count the things that we're faithful for. Almost every day Hashem says yes to something we asked for yesterday, but how often do we stop to say thank you? Thank you the drasha went well, the speech went well, the technology worked. Thank you my children are safe, they're at home. Thank you we got from point A to point B. Thank you that thing I was so worried about worked out. We have a whole list of things that we need that we ask for, but how often do we stop and say thank you when it works out? We forget, we move on, we go forward, but you have to say thank you. Emunah b'Hashem doesn't come easily. ונצרך יגיעה רבה כדי לקבוע האמונה בקרבו. It takes enormous effort. It takes superhuman effort, mindfulness, consciousness. It takes enormous effort to instill, to plant emunah in our hearts, to work out the emunah muscle, to put on the emunah glasses, to look at the world through the emunah perspective. V'zehu she'amru Chazal, yagati umatzati. yagati umatzasi taamin. The Gemara Megilla daf zayin tells us, ostensibly talking about Torah in general, that if a person says that I yagati velo matzasi or lo yagati umatzasi, but yagati umatzasi taamin. yagati means I put in effort, I worked, I toiled, it took effort. umatzasi and I got a result, there was a result, there was a return on my effort. taamin, believe them. כי רק המתיגע זוכה לבוא אל האמונה. אבל לא יגעתי ומצאתי אל תאמין. If a person says, you know, it landed in my lap, you know, I downloaded it easily, you know, it just happened to be, didn't take effort, didn't take work, didn't take toil, just came to be, don't believe them. No pain, no gain. You know who said that? No pain, no gain. None of you remember no pain, no gain? I remember who said it. No pain, no gain. Chazal said it. It's a Mishna. Yeah, I know, you were thinking about Jane Fonda or what was that gym, that old gym called? No pain, no gain. I don't know, Richard Simmons, didn't he just pass away? Oh, blessed man. No pain, no gain. They didn't say it. They didn't coin it. Our fact corrector, our fact checker, will let me know later, but they didn't say it. You know who said it? Chazal. The Mishna in Avos says lefum tza'ara agra. According to your pain is your reward. According to the pain is the reward. No pain, no gain. lefum tza'ara agra, according to the pain is the reward. If a person says, I didn't go work out, I never made it to the gym, I didn't lift any weights, I didn't do sit-ups and push-ups, but I woke up this morning and my muscles are much bigger, don't believe them. lo yagati umatzasi, I didn't make any effort but it all worked out, don't believe them. But yagati umatzasi taamin. The person who says I tried, I worked, I toiled, and I found, that's to believe. yagati umatzasi taamin. כן האמונה דבר שבא בכך לזכות בו בלי יגיעה מרובה. Emunah's not just something like, would you believe one day it just clicked and it happened and for the rest of my life I looked at life differently? No. המציאות הזו הבאה מתוך יגיעה נאמר באברהם אבינו ומצאת את לבבו נאמן לפניך. We say every day in our davening in Vayivarech David, a pasuk from Nechemya, ומצאת את לבבו נאמן לפניך, talking about Avraham Avinu, שמתוך יגיעתו של אברהם אבי המאמינים בהשם נמצא לבבו נאמן לפני השם יתברך, that out of the effort and the toil and the work of Avraham, the father of faith in Hashem, his heart was ne'eman to Hashem. וכמו שהכתוב מעיד עליו והאמין בהשם ויחשבה לו צדקה. So the first thing you need to know before we'll talk about the methodology and the strategy and how to work on it is it takes work, it's hard. But here's the deal, anything in life that's worthwhile takes work and is hard. Marriage, parenting take effort, they take work. You know the most rewarding thing in life is children, and the most painful thing in life is children, for sure, because anything rewarding takes pain, takes effort, takes effort. That was the article two weeks ago or three weeks ago about the low birth rate and the people the whole world now choosing not to have children. It's inconvenient, it's uncomfortable, it's expensive, and I just want what makes me happy. Literally threatening extinction in developed countries, prioritizing ourselves over others, our present over our future. Anything in life that's worthwhile takes effort. Living a healthy life, you want longevity? You want your joints to work? You want to get on the floor and play with your great-grandchildren? You want to be around for your great-grandchildren? You want to walk down the aisle instead of being pushed down it? Then it makes, takes effort, to exercise, to get enough sleep, to eat right, to do the things today that you have to do to live your future self tomorrow. But nobody wants to because those donuts are so good. And if you paid a hundred dollars per donut, you might as well eat it. So, so it's hard. It's very hard. It takes effort. Anything worthwhile takes effort. Health, relationships, marriages take effort. But a wonderful marriage, a rewarding marriage, a gratifying, satisfying marriage, if a person is zocheh to really two halves become a whole, to live, to be a shalem person, there's nothing better in the world, in the world, but it takes effort: mindfulness, consciousness, compromise, sacrifice, intention, and effort. Parenting, marriage, career, professional ambition, the list could go on and on. So what, all those things will take effort, but emuna is just going to land in your lap? That relationship with Hashem, that's just going to be a given and granted to you and a gift? It all takes effort. Anything worthwhile, anything meaningful takes effort. וכך נרמז בשאלה ששואלים כל אדם בבואו לעולם העליון, and that's the hinted to, alluded to in the question that we're all asked when we come to the world of truth, when we meet our maker. The Gemara Shabbat daf lamed aleph, Gemara Shabbat tells us we're asked a series of questions when we come upstairs. And the first one is Nasata ve-natata be-emuna. Did you do your business dealings faithfully? In the simple understanding is, were you honest? Did you have integrity? Was your word your bond? Were you trustworthy? Were you reliable? Or did you advertise falsely? Did you exaggerate? Did you cut corners? Did you file your taxes dishonestly? ולכאורה הרי כל אדם עסק במשא ומתן כי אדם שאינו עוסק במסחר כלום לא ישאל Nasata ve-natata be-emuna? What happens when you come upstairs and you say, Hashem, I wasn't in business. I didn't do business. Why is the heavenly court asking me, did I do my business with integrity and honesty and faithfully? I'm not a businessman, I'm not a businesswoman, I wasn't in business. אלא ששואלים כל אדם אם עסק והתייגע במידת האמונה כמו וגם של סוחר עם משא ומתן כי אין האמונה נרכשת בלב האדם אם אינו שם כל משאו ומתנו במידה זו כדרך הסוחרים המניחים כל חפצם ומוחם בעסקיהם. That's not the question, says Rav David Abuhatzeira. The question is not literally about your business, honesty and integrity. The question is Nasata ve-natata be-emuna, did you do your emuna the way that people deal with business? Speak to a driven, ambitious business person, man or woman, ooh, that's all they think about, dream about, falling asleep, in the shower, awake, davening, working out. All they're thinking about is their business. Oh, I had an idea, a market, a customer, or we can, we can cut costs, or we can increase our profits, or we can hire, or we can cut. A person in business is constantly challenging themselves and thinking and growing, taking stock quarterly and annually and looking at and reporting. Did you bring that same sense of seriousness? Did you bring the same sense of evaluating? Right, it's the Gregorian New Year. How many businesses, how many people privately in their own business are taking stock? Let's look at the past year, let's look at our revenue and profit margin, let's look at our P&L's, let's look at how did we do, did we meet our expectations, come in under or over, what are our goals, let's set goals for the future year. So all of those conversation, all that lingo, all that language, all that effort that we do in business life, do we do it to life? Do we look at our marriage, our parenting, our character, our shul attendance, and do we say, okay, let's take stock quarterly, annually? Did we come in under our goals, over our goals? Let's set our goals for the next year. How'd we do? That's the question Rav David Abuhatzeira says we'll be asked. Because maybe you'll say, I'm not in business, why am I being asked that? The answer is, the question is not about how did you act in business, but did you bring to your emuna the same sense of ambition and drive, the same evaluation and reflection that you brought to your business, to your business. We'll pick up with this next week, we have to end here because everyone's invited. Rav Ephraim Shapiro, fantastic speaker, speaking in six minutes, everyone's invited into the main shul. We'll pick up with this next time, but no shiur next week on Wednesday, no shiur on Wednesday. I'm going to put out an emuna shiur next week because I'm giving an emuna shiur, but I'll be in London. It's not, if you're in London, I don't know yet what's public or private that I'm speaking, I'll try to share. But Chanukah tonight, look at those candles. Light up your life, light up somebody else's life, get lit in life, be on fire in all that we do, and bask in that light that please God will dispel the darkness and bring only a lot of great light for all of us. Should be a great day, besoros tovos, and a gut chodesh.
