Transcript
Good morning. Good morning boker tov, welcome back to Living with emunah. So a reminder it's our final shiur for a little while, we're taking a little break till after Tisha B'Av. You can go online, you can catch up, you can listen from the beginning. I don't remember what number shiur this is but there are several hundred. So it's always good chazara and any podcast player or YouTube you could find it. And in our WhatsApp group we'll continue to share, hopefully share inspiration. Our emunah series is generously sponsored by Dr. Zavi and Bella Morgan, we remain deeply indebted to the Morgans for their generosity, sponsored in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut and in memory of Bella's mother Dr. Ellen Sheinfeld. Today's shiur is also sponsored by Michelle Diamond and the Diamond family in honor of the third yahrtzeit of our beloved Chaim Diamond whom we miss terribly. Chaim was a very, very special person, authentic, genuine, real, deep person of strength and faith and we miss him. His neshama should have an aliyah. Also sponsored this morning by Mrs. Deborah Moskowitz in commemoration of the yahrtzeit of her father משה לייב בן שרגא פייבל on Rosh Chodesh Teves. God has been with me all my life. Thank you very much, neshama should have an aliyah as well. And by Rona Cohen in memory of her beloved mother Dora Jaffee, her neshama should have an aliyah. Thank you very much. Okay, we have a flurry of WhatsApp of emunah emails rather that we'll get back into the text. We've been learning the beautiful, beautiful Torah of Moshe Shapiro, zechuso yagen aleinu on emes ve-emunah. The truth that there is a God and then the application: living, manifesting, implementing that there is a God. And that's why these emails that we begin with, I hold they're not bittul Torah. It's not that the emails are delaying or they are distractions from our study of Torah, they are actually the application, the implementation, they're part of the study of Torah because emes ve-emunah. Emes is that there's Hakadosh Baruch Hu, the reality and the truth is the fact is there's a creator, there's an Almighty, it's His world, He runs it, He controls it, He is the source of all, He is everything in it, and the emunah is taking that truth and living it. And that's what these emails are an example of. I thank everybody who takes the time to write an email. Every email I read is deeply moving and meaningful to me. I don't get a chance to read them all in the shiur or sometimes they wait to catch up, but please write, please share, because it's deeply meaningful to me and I know we've all heard how many people write emails that say I heard all the other emails and that helped me live with emunah and helped me have my story. Dear Rabbi Goldberg, thank you so much for the weekly emunah emails, they provide such a great boost of emunah for me every week. This week was one of many tragedies in Klal Yisrael. This was written July 5th. We lost twelve soldiers and my beautiful friend Adina Zahavi. I want to share some of her story with you because it gave me such chizuk in my emunah and I believe it can impact others. There was a terrible fire, you remember, a mother who saved her children and was killed. A tragic, tragic, a very special woman. Adina was larger than life who loved everyone and had a big heart, heart big enough for everyone. Her shiva was packed with people from all walks of life who all thought they were her closest friend because she made everyone feel that way. But the thing I found most impressive about Adina is the emunah she instilled in her family. Adina gave her life saving her children from a fire in their home in the middle of the night. She and her husband ran in and out of the house saving eight of her children from the flames. At the levaya her husband and her five oldest children ranging from nineteen to ten spoke, and every single one of them said variations of the same thing: this is the ratzon Hashem, this is good because Hashem only does chesed. This is a family that lost everything, went through an insane traumatic event, lost their mother, and despite their immense pain they see Hashem so clearly. Hanging in the shiva house right now are signs that Adina's husband asked to be hung up and they say mekablem be'ahava, accepting this with love. I am attaching the picture to the email. Mekablem be'ahava, it says in the shiva home, was the sign. Through their pain they can only see Hashem. May Adina's neshama have an aliyah, may Hashem provide her family and friends nechama. Please keep her son מיכל בן עדינה בת שבע in tefillos. He's an eight year old in the ICU with third degree burns. Should have a complete and speedy refuah sheleimah. Mekablem be'ahava. How many of us are mekablem be'ahava? Do we accept whatever it is that Hashem gives us with love? We're not mekabel when the wifi's out be'ahava. We're not mekabel the delayed flight or the cancelled plans or the waiter messing up our order or the person who kept us waiting or the fact that we didn't get an aliyah and that same guy got an aliyah again every week. We're not mekabel be'ahava the most minor, inconsequential little things that won't impact us in the long term. And here there are outstanding people, extraordinary people, and she's right, what a testament, what a testament to Adina that that's the legacy she left, that her children, husband, all, all capture that attitude. By the way, mekablem be'ahava doesn't mean and therefore there's music playing and we sing and dance and mekablem be'ahava so we're not sad. Mekablem be'ahava means with... sadness and grief and tears and endless pain but mekabel b'ahava. Those who were here last night heard another example of mekabel b'ahava. A mind-boggling, hard to believe, almost hard to believe real example of mekabel b'ahava. Just mind-boggling. The incredible Orit Mark Etzinger spoke last night and I won't take the time now and her book is being translated into English hopefully everyone will be able to read it and maybe we'll have her on Behind the Bima so we can really share more broadly. But her father was killed in a terror attack in which her mother was also shot and lost an eye and her brother was working for the Mossad was killed and then her cousin was killed in Be'eri rescuing people, rescued a hundred people, saved 20 babies and then was killed by Hamas terrorists and then her youngest brother was killed fighting in Gaza. She lost four family members in seven years. And when you see her she's just a ray of light and sunshine and smile and positivity and now is speaking to soldiers before they go into fight talking all about how we have to be positive and make our own story and not wallow in our pain and see Hashem's hand and see this through and understand our mission. There are such people. There are such people. Mekabel b'ahava. Mekabel b'ahava. I hope we will never ever be tested, some here have been already, but we'll never be tested please God to be mekabel b'ahava such such things to have to hang such a sign in a shiva home. But it should inspire all of us that whatever's going on to live with emuna means that whatever's going on, whatever's going on, big or small, we're mekabel b'ahava. Whatever's meant to be. Someone here recently shared a story of sitting on a plane for three hours delayed not knowing what will be whether they'll be able to make their flight and if it gets canceled it was already Thursday and can't get there before Shabbos and how does that change all of the plans and all of the schedule and everything that was done in advance. And then you remember oh yeah I'm supposed to be mekabel b'ahava. I forgot I go to the Emuna Shiur. I forgot I'm supposed to just let go and let God and it'll be what it'll be and you know what will not make the plane take off any faster, you know what will not make the pilot pull back on the throttle, your worry, your anxiety. Know what it will do? It'll ruin your vacation, your mental health, your physical health, it'll drive your spouse crazy, they're going to move their seat and switch with somebody else. They'll move into coach, to the back, rather than have to live with that ball of anxiety and worry and nervousness and that's all it's going to do is push people away, all it's going to do is keep you grounded instead of help you take off in life. So mekabel b'ahava. If people could hang that sign, mekabel b'ahava. Okay the Wi-Fi went out. Okay the waiter messed up your order. Okay the person kept you waiting. Okay whatever okay mekabel b'ahava, mekabel b'ahava. Rabbi Goldberg thank you so much, blah blah blah, I'm a relatively new listener and have seen much change in my outlook as I work to apply what I've learned. One thing that repeatedly comes back to me is a Jew is never stuck. A Jew is never stuck. And I have an example to share. Story I have didn't involve me but instead involved my teenage son. Eitan is a lifeguard and a counselor at a local Jewish day camp. On Friday he was assigned to the pool for the five to six-year-old boys. After swim was finished he had to put away the numerous pool toys and as he said he was pretty annoyed that all the counselors took off without helping straighten up. He said that while he was cleaning up he saw one of the counselors lying on a bench so he went over to this boy and said hey what happened to your bunk what's up? The boy said yeah I'm just taking a rest. In that moment Eitan knew something wasn't right because the boy wasn't looking at him or focusing properly. Eitan started tapping his knee asking hey you alright? He didn't get much of an answer this time so he looked around quickly and saw one of the camp EMTs. Eitan told him something was up. He said oh yeah he wanted to rest a bit. Eitan said no come over there's something wrong. EMT and another adult then took over and got the boy cold water and began giving him medical attention. He knew that if there had been other people around cleaning up he might not have noticed this other boy and if he himself hadn't been volunteering on an ambulance squad he might not have realized something was wrong. It was an incredibly hot day when this took place and if Eitan hadn't been in the right place at the right time the story could have had a tragic ending. Thanks for reading, thanks for helping us grow in emuna, we should see yeshuos and besoros tovos speedily. A Jew is never stuck. Even putting away the pool toys. You're not stuck. You're not, it doesn't mean you're not allowed to go inside and say to the counselors hey where'd you all go and next time you have to help me. I want to be clear because I know this can be misunderstood and misrepresented. Living with emuna doesn't mean not holding other people accountable. Living with emuna doesn't mean that you can't tell your children you got to clean your room, put away your laundry, do your chores, help out at home. Living with emuna doesn't mean that you can't sit down respectfully and productively share with a spouse how we can improve our communication or this made me feel that way or we could do this differently. Again, productively. Living with emuna doesn't, mekabel b'ahava doesn't mean being a punching bag and being a, being a floor mat. That's not mekabel b'ahava. Mekabel b'ahava means whatever is happening is what's meant to be, I'm never stuck, I am where I'm meant to be and whatever's happening is what's meant to happen. And now I can still take action. So you know... Somebody slams into your car, oh, mekabel b'ahava. I'm gonna hang a sign in my windshield that my car that's all dented up and can't drive anymore, I'm mekabel b'ahava. I accept with love that this is what was meant to be. Yes, mekabel b'ahava, and now go get the other person's insurance information. Mekabel b'ahava, put the note on his insurance mekabel b'ahava. Mekabel b'ahava. So, yes, hold accountable, follow up, speak respectfully, but communicate, resolve and reconcile. And living with emunah doesn't mean being a punching bag. Doesn't mean being a floor mat, doesn't mean sweeping everything under the carpet and under the bed. Living with emunah means doing what we need to do at any given time and any given moment, but realizing that whatever position we find ourselves in, mekabel b'ahava. A Yid, a Jew is never stuck. You're never stuck, wherever you're grounded you're not stuck, it's where you're meant to be, and whatever you find yourself, even if it's cleaning up alone, you may figure out, right, this boy found out why he was meant to be there cleaning up by himself because he potentially saved that other boy's life. What if what if all was well and good? You'd never know why you were there, and that's most often in life that we never find out why we're stuck where we are. To mekabel that b'ahava too, that's just the way it's meant to be in that moment. Mekabel b'ahava. Today during the emunah shiur you read an email about someone who had written an emunah email but kept it in their drafts folder. You remember last week, the boy with the broken engagement? While I didn't physically keep it in my drafts, I've been contemplating writing one in a mental draft folder if you will. Please bear with me, it's the ultimate emunah email touching on fertility, missiles and even flying. A little over a year ago my husband and I began fertility treatments. It's difficult for me to delve deeply into this topic, even though now we've been blessed by Hashem with a beautiful baby girl. I want to share a glimpse of our journey and express how the emunah shiurim supported me during this challenging time. I started a note section on my phone titled "all the places I see Hashem" and actively chose to recognize Hashem's hand in everything. The monitoring and specific medications required were hard and tiring, but strengthened by my emunah I was able to see Hashem's love even when the outcomes seemed bleak. I wanted this emunah email to be one that can offer hope to anyone struggling with fertility, but articulating the process remains a challenge for me. Perhaps one day I'll find the right words. Thank you for nurturing the emunah providing the strength I needed during the period. Our daughter was born on April 12th just before the missile attack from Iran, which occurred while we were still at the hospital. I was awake in the middle of the night feeling unwell and had asked the nurse for medication when the missiles struck. Reflecting on it I marveled at the hashgacha that I happened to be awake at the moment, enabling us to take our baby to safety promptly. Due to me being in a wheelchair my husband couldn't manage both me and the baby, but a visiting stranger kindly assisted us, truly exemplifying mi k'amcha yisrael. When people found out about our experience during the attack I honestly had no recollection. I had completely forgotten about the missiles, perhaps it was postpartum fog, but in the moment I felt an overwhelming calm and gratitude to Hashem for placing us exactly where we needed to be, ensuring the best care for both baby and me. We managed to obtain my daughter's passport well before our flight home, though not without its own challenges. We navigated a long way to the embassy, encountered delays due to unforeseen circumstances, including an Arab holiday and Juneteenth. Throughout the uncertainty my prayer remained simple: Hashem, let what is best happen. What a great prayer: Hashem, let what is best happen. I did not ask to force our way onto the flight, I saw guidance and acceptance of what was meant to be. Baruch Hashem we made it. Thank you for the emunah shiurim. What time is it? Okay, we'll read one more and then we'll get back into the text that we're learning. Okay, hi Rabbi Goldberg, I have an emunah story for you. Almost a year ago at this point my husband and I were desperately seeking a new apartment in the area in which we live. My husband is in the kollel and he really didn't want to leave his yeshiva, but we really couldn't find an apartment that was good, non-sketchy area, and not a basement since basements give me allergies. Where I live it's really hard to find an apartment that meets both of these criteria since all the apartments in the good area are basements and the ground floor apartments are not—we know she doesn't live in Florida—and are not in the best areas. We were looking and trying for months but with no luck. One day we were feeling really down about the whole situation, walking around the streets in the best part of the neighborhood, and my husband and I were talking about emunah and bitachon. Hashem can truly do anything. We were saying how if Hashem wanted, one of the homes we were walking by could totally just have a first floor apartment for rent pop up. It sounded crazy, crazy, since it really didn't exist. But at that moment we believed that Hashem can do anything in the world. Literally a few days later I saw on a WhatsApp apartment chat that a first floor of a house in the best area right next to my husband's yeshiva was for rent. Not only that, but it was beautiful, newly renovated and seemed perfect. We went to visit it immediately and essentially told the broker we'd take it. Since it was such a great apartment and was so rare to find, tons of people were coming to visit and we had to apply to live there, and the landlords would choose who they wanted. I was really davening and hoping we would get it since it felt I felt like Hashem answered my tefillos and it was so perfect. Later that day the broker texted me, unfortunately another couple who applied had a connection somehow to the landlords, so the landlords chose them to live in the perfect apartment. I was devastated. I really, really wanted the apartment so badly and was so stressed about what my husband and I were going to do. Hashem knows what's best for me hundred times more than I think I know. Right after I finally felt menuchas hanefesh, knowing with full confidence that Hashem is the boss and does everything for the best, the broker called. He said the apartment fell through with the other couple and the landlord was willing to give it to us. Baruch Hashem, we ended up getting the apartment. We've been living there for almost a year now and it's really perfect. My husband is able to learn right near the yeshiva, I'm so happy. Happens to be this emunah has a story has a happy ending, but throughout it all I really concluded Hashem loves me more than I love myself and He knows what's best for everyone. I realized that a life without emunah is incomparable to a life without it. Thank you Hashem and I hope in the zechus of the emunah of all the Yidden, Moshiach will come soon be'ezras Hashem amen amen. Okay, I'll have to put aside more for the next shiur when we come back because we gotta get to the text. Why do we read all these stories, from getting the right apartment to making it to the flight to fertility treatments to a shiva home and mekabel b'ahava? Each of these stories become for us an image in our head, a reminder that when we hopefully don't find ourselves in similar circumstances, but less significant circumstances, mekabel b'ahava, mekabel b'ahava. In that shiva home if they can hang a sign mekabel b'ahava, and that's an instruction to all the people who visit. Don't sit here and wonder, where is God? Be sad, be cry, shed a tear, grieve, feel a loss, lean into the pain, but mekabel all of it with a sense of b'ahava. We're in the middle of page chaf daled Re'eh Emunah in Rav Moshe Shapiro's wonderful sefer on the yud gimmel ikkarim on the chapter of emes ve'emunah. אנשי אמנה מכוח הגילוי של בית המקדש. The Gemara says in Sotah daf mem chet: mishecharav Beis HaMikdash, we're now in the month of Tammuz and soon we'll be beginning the three weeks. Hopefully we won't, we'll be in Yerushalayim Ir HaKodesh together, the next emunah shiur. By the time the next emunah shiur we'll be hosting it, we'll have to find a place, but in Yerushalayim Ir HaKodesh and we'll be learning together there forever with Moshiach and peace and the hostages home and our soldiers returned to their families. משחרב בית המקדש בטל השמיר ונופת צופים ופסקו אנשי אמנה. The Gemara there says that since the Beis HaMikdash was destroyed, certain things or aspects or miracles of it have been lost, and one of the things that were listed: pasku anshei amana. Rabbi Yitzchak אמר רבי יצחק אלו בני אדם שמאמינים בהקדוש ברוך הוא. What are anshei amana? What does it mean since the end of the Beis HaMikdash, since its destruction as we've been living and navigating these two thousand years of exile, so the people who live with emunah we've lost, we've lost that art, we've lost that trait. Rabbi Yitzchak אמר רבי יצחק אלו בני אדם שמאמינים בהקדוש ברוך הוא דתניא רבי אליעזר הגדול אומר כל מי שיש לו פת בסלו ואומר מה אוכל למחר אינו אלא מקטני אמנה. Anyone who has pas besalo, you got bread in your basket, you've got money in your bank account, and you're still asking what will I eat tomorrow? You are deficient, diminished, you are lacking in emunah. You are mikotnei amana. You're lacking in emunah. If you have money in the bank account and you're still worried about what I'll eat tomorrow. So Rashi explains: what does it mean mikotnei amana? שמאמינים בהקדוש ברוך הוא לוותר ממונם לנוי הידור מצוה ולצדקה ולצורכי שבתות וימים טובים. Who are the katnei amana? Who are people who believe, it's not just emunah in general, the general category of emunah, but it is the people who believe that whatever money they spend to beautify a mitzvah, whatever money they give away in tzedakah, whatever money they spend on Shabbos or Yom Tov, they're not really giving away at all because Hakadosh Baruch Hu replaces it, supplies it, and they'll get it back. That's what it means to live with amana, emunah. That's what during the time of the Beis HaMikdash people were able to do. They realized, you know, I'm just the steward of this bank account. I am the custodian of this bank account, of this trust. Hakadosh Baruch Hu created a trust, and it's called tzedakah and hiddur mitzvah and Shabbos and Yom Tov trust. It's for those three things. And you know, I'm just the trustee. But He's the funder of the trust. And whenever the trust goes down, He puts in more. So I would never hesitate to spend it. Why would I hesitate to spend it? Imagine a billionaire, billionaire philanthropist came to you. You should imagine it because it would be a dream come true. A billionaire philanthropist comes to you and says I have a charitable foundation and I'd like you to be the CEO, I'd like you to be the director of the foundation. And the foundation has billions and trillions and gazillions of dollars and every year in the foundation charter, in the foundation bylaws, you have to give away five percent of the income or we have to whatever the case may be, we've got to give away. We've got to give away. There was once a holy Jew, Sanford Bernstein, who made such a, Avi Chai, is that what it was called? He put together that money and said it must be distributed to transform Jewish education and enrich the Jewish world. Imagine who was the lucky lottery winner who said, didn't get the money, but got to be in charge of the money, and decide where does it go? Would you hesitate to give it out? Would you hesitate to allocate it? that the person who's who provided it who put it together will replenish it. So Hakadosh Baruch Hu says you should view a part of your assets as a trust that you run, you run a foundation. This happens to be the best way to give tzedakah. If you've not done it, you should. Some people think, well, I don't qualify to do this because I'm not a billionaire, so I can't create a charitable foundation. But anybody can open up another bank account and simply take ten percent of their after-tax income and put it in that other bank account. And you know, when you give tzedakah, sometimes it hurts and it's hard because you say, this is my hard-earned money. And really, I could redo my kitchen or get more jewelry or go on a nicer vacation. Really, I could worry less about paying tuition, and instead I'm giving this to tzedakah, it makes me more nervous when I see my bank account. It hurts. It's hard. I know that because I see the look on some people's face when I ask for money. It would be easier to ask for their kidney. I think some people would be more open to giving their kidney than to giving tzedakah because for some it's hard. In fact, in the Talmud, the word for money is damim, which means blood, because money is our hard-earned blood. We toiled, we sacrificed, it's our hard-earned blood, sweat, and tears to earn that money and to give it away is to give away our blood. And also it's called damim because it's how does one live? You need to have confidence and trust that you have what you need to live, and if you give away too much then you're risking your blood. It could be dangerous. So for some it's very hard. But if you set up a separate account and ten percent of your after-tax income you put into that other account, you never look at that other account as if it were yours to begin with. It was never yours. So now you just get to be there's no difference between Bill Gates and Warren Buffett and you. You also have a foundation. It may have a few less zeros in it but you have a foundation too. And so when you get to have fun, now you sit down with your spouse or whoever you want and you say, oh, what do we care about? What matters to us? Which envelopes do we want to answer? Which matching, which great-nephew's text would you support this, my Yeshiva's running a matching, oy, whoever invented the matching campaign, God bless them. So which, what do you want to give to? But now you have fun with it instead of it hurting you, you, but that's all if you have emunah that what? There's someone who's going to keep replenishing the fund. If you're worried about the fund, then it's going to be hard. It's going to be hard. בסגנון דומה אמרה גמרא, the Gemara in Beitzah has a similar idea. אמר להם הקדוש ברוך הוא לישראל בני לוו עלי וקדשו קדושת היום והאמינו בי ואני פורע. Trust me, lean on me, and sanctify the day, and believe in me, and I will pay, and I will pay. So you say, you know, I'm sorry, but we've got to serve pita and hummus for Shabbos because I'm not going to spend money on Shabbos because I don't know where the money will come from. No, Hashem promised us, whatever you spend on honoring Shabbos within reason. You can't go out and buy an eight hundred dollar bottle of wine and first-cut corned beef and things you can't afford and go in debt and say, Hashem, what's the deal, I thought you said you're going to provide? Charcuterie boards and Kiddush and fancy whatever, you can't go spend beyond your means. But spending within reason, Hashem says, spend within reason. I know different neighborhoods now have different definitions of within reason, let's try to keep ours within actual reason. So spend within reason and Hashem says I got your back. I'm going to replenish, I'm going to provide. So says Rav Moshe Shapiro, המאמינים הם אלו החיים בתפיסת עולם. What does it mean to live with emunah is to have a grasp on this world, to see clearly, to not only see the surface and the superficial, to not only see the number in the bank account, but to see the banker behind it, to see the funder behind it. שכל פעולה בשביל הקדוש ברוך הוא לקיים מצוות ואינו יכול להביא חיסרון. If you live your life and you live a different calculus. Some people's calculus, their calculation, their matrix they live by is only money, money, money, money. You know such people. None of them are here right now or listening, of course. But we all know such people who the only filter through which they see the world. You don't know this but like children, teenagers who are on social media or on your phone you could add a filter and it makes a funny face and you see things differently. What's a filter? A filter is the way you see something, you can overlay a filter and now that's how you see it, right? So some people, they overlay a filter and they see the whole world only about money. It's all they see. They walk in a room, what's that person worth? What does that thing cost? How much does that person own? How much do I have? How much will I have? How much have I spent? Their whole life, their whole life. Usually they grew up in such a home, they lived with such a fear and now that's passed on to the next generation. Their responsibility is to break that cycle and not pay it forward and not pass it on. But their whole life is just the matrix, the calculus, the calculation, the spreadsheet, all of life is just money. How much was the gift that they gave my children at their wedding? I'm not giving a penny more. So they've got a spreadsheet, there are people who have spreadsheets about who gave gifts that were worth how much to each of their children at their simcha, so they know how much to give to the other person. You don't believe me? I've seen it. There are people who have such spreadsheets. Ad kedei kach, they have such spreadsheets. When they had me over for a Shabbos meal, they served chicken, I'm not serving them meat. When there are people who have such spreadsheets. They walk in a room, who's worth what, how much have they given, how much is everything is money. Why? Because the more I give, the less I have, the more a chisaron, the more a vacuum, the more a space it creates. But a person whose calculation, what if your overlay, what if your filter were not seeing the world through money, but seeing the world through mitzvos? What if you saw the world through not the physical material world, and again I'm not endorsing living irresponsibly and spending beyond your means and going into debt and just trusting in Hashem, that's not trust in Hashem. You have to be reasonable and normal. So I keep giving these caveats and these disclaimers because they're important. But a person can live with a filter and an overlay where they see the world through Torah and mitzvos. They don't see the superficial and the surface, they walk in a room and they see, oh, what a ba'al chesed. That person has incredible emunah, that person davens amazingly. Look at the that person learns, that person's mitzvos. That's what they see the net worth of the other people around them is nothing to do with their assets or material possessions, but Torah and mitzvos. And they see their own net worth. They see their own net worth and they measure every day, how many mitzvos did I accumulate? How many mitzvos did I forgo or forfeit and fail to do? The whole matrix and their whole overlay and their whole spreadsheets in life are all about the mitzvos, the mitzvos and the Torah and the bitachon and the emunah and the relationship with Hashem and they realize that when I do a mitzvah it can never create a chisaron. It will never lead to a chisaron. So you know what? That person served me chicken, but if I serve them meat it will I'll never be out, I'll never be at a loss. I'll never be disadvantaged because I went above and beyond. When I do chesed, when I sign up and I cook that meal for the meal train, when I show up and I volunteer, when I stay behind and put the pool things away, when I do whatever's above I'll never be lacking, it'll never be a loss for me. It'll never be a loss. מי שמרגיש שיחסר ממונו לצורך מצוה ויפסיד ולא יהיה לו, somebody who says if I spend that money on a mitzvah, it'll be a loss and I'll be lacking, אדם כזה לא יהיה מסוגל לשאת מעצמו. Such a person can never give of themselves. Such a person is living without emunah. If you think if I do that mitzvah, then I will be lacking, I'll be deficient, I'll be without, אבל אנשי אמונה יודעים שממקור הברכה לא יחסר להם. But if you know that when it comes to mitzvos in particular, I have a donor, I have a funder. Every mitzvah I do I have a funder. There are, there are extraordinary people who have come to me who say, Rabbi, if you ever have this, give me the privilege I want to pay for it. There are such incredible angels in life. Rabbi, if there's ever a funeral and the people can't afford the the grave, let me know. That's my mitzvah. And somebody else, Rabbi, when you have people who genuinely can't pay their rent or have let me know. Let me know. Not endless, not endless, but let me know I want that opportunity, I want that mitzvah. So now as the Rabbi or as the person in charge of that committee or that chesed or that gemach, now you know I have a funder for this. So anything I give out, it doesn't come out, I'm not lacking, I don't lose, because I have a backer, I have a funder, I have somebody who cares about this and who has the capacity to provide it. So now I'm never going to hesitate to allocate because I have a backer who has the capacity to provide. So the Ribbono Shel Olam wants every one of us to walk around our lives and say, when it comes to the pursuit of Torah and mitzvos, I have a backer, I have a funder, and he has the capacity. Within reason again, I'm not saying you should go home, I'm not saying you shouldn't, but I'm not saying you should go home, check your bank account, and write the entire thing to Boca Raton Synagogue because there's a funder and a backer and he's going to take care and that's a mitzvah. Within reason we have rules. We're going to get to in a moment, in fact you're not allowed to. One of the rules that the funder gave is, you can't ever give away more than 20% of your income. That's a rule of the funder. Our funder God, our backer said, I want you to give, give 10%, don't give less of your after-tax dollars, but also don't give more than 20. The sweet spot is between 10 and 20%. Now there is an exception to that rule the Gemara says, if you taka are Bill Gates or Warren Buffett, if you taka have billions of dollars and giving more than 20% will never put you in a position that you'll ever need to collect, begeizunt. Give much more than 20%. And there is a beautiful movement, I don't know if you know it in America, it's called the something pledge. What's it called? The Giving Pledge, did Warren Buffett start it? Someone, some great philanthropist started it, Bill Gates started it, right, for people who have billions of dollars the Giving Pledge is to give away at least 50% of your net worth. Because for generations to come they will not be impacted an iota, but you can enormously impact the world. Halevai we created a Jewish—there is a movement and there are people working on this—but the Jewish Giving Pledge because there are there's enough Jewish billionaires to solve every Jewish financial problem on the planet. And one of them is the state of Florida, we're grateful in Florida to them for for helping solve the Jewish education one. But there are enough out there to solve it, to be able to solve it. But if you're not a billionaire, if you're not a billionaire, then you're not allowed to give more than 20%. So don't be irresponsible. The sweet spot is 10 to 20%. And then we have a funder, we have a backer, He has capacity, and He says what you're going to spend on your lulav and esrog, get the nice one. When you have a choice, I get this a lot, you know, I get the privilege of being invited when people knock down a house and build a new house or do a major renovation, as the Rabbi I'm the first one to see it. Why? Not to give it a blessing. Rabbi, can you walk the house with me to tell me where and how many mezuzahs I need? Almost every time, I have the same experience, which is incredible shock when we get to the end, how many doorways they inadvertently built that need mezuzahs, and the reality of how much a mezuzah costs, and how much was not included in the budget of their new home for mezuzahs. And then the follow-up question comes, when they contact the sofer, and the sofer says I have mezuzas for this price, this price, and that price. Say Rabbi, does it really make a difference? Like, it's just going in the case and you roll it up and does it really matter? The sofer told me that even the minimum one is kosher, so isn't that good enough to get the minimum one? That's also kosher, isn't that isn't that good enough? To which I answer, I just toured your new home. Was everything else you put in the home good enough? Or did you go for a little more than good enough? And on my way out of your home, I noticed the car in your driveway. And was it good enough? Was it a car that got you from point A to point B? Because there are cars that get you to point A to point B that you can still roll down the windows. There are cars that get you to point A to point B that still have a tape player in them. So is it good enough? It gets you to point A to point B. Or did you want some bells and whistles? Did you like a nicer ornament on the hood? Did you look for more features? So Hakadosh Baruch Hu says to us, when you're going to buy that mezuzah, I promise you, I'm the funder, I'm the donor, I'm the philanthropist, I've got the capacity, and I'm telling you whatever you spend to do the mitzvah right, I've got you covered. And I'm telling you within reason whatever you spend on Shabbos and Yom Tov to have a beautiful Shabbos and Yom Tov, within reason I've got you. And I'm telling you that when people are hungry, and when people need, and you're asked to give, up to 20%, I've got you. And when you say I know that, and I live that, and I don't hesitate because of that, you're living with emunah. And when you say but I don't know, and it still hurts, and I don't want to, and do I have to, and now you start to rationalize everything else also, but a portion of my tuition already go and I pay taxes and from the government they also provide welfare so I'm giving—you start to figure out why you're already doing enough and you don't need to say yes and you don't need to give, so are you living we really we're living with emunah? Are you really living with emunah? Here we're going from the emes to the emunah. Emes is you could shuckle all day in shul. You could answer Baruch Hashem, Im Yirtzeh Hashem, Be'ezras Hashem, you could talk the emunah talk all day long. And now someone asks you to give tzedakah. You're going from emes to emunah. Now the question is, is it all talk, or is it action? Because it's all talk until it's action. Is it lip service, or is it Venmo, Zelle, check, credit card service? Are you ready to cash? We take whatever you know whatever you want we give we're happy to accept. But Hakadosh Baruch Hu says I'm testing your this is the test of your emunah. I'm the one who provides, and you're good to go. And this is a separate fund. You could decide when it comes to the rest of your assets, you want to go out to eat, not go out to eat, redo the furniture, what kind of vacation, what you can afford, how you want to live, that's all up to you. But this separate fund, Shabbos, Yom Tov, tzedakah, and what was the last thing? Hiddur mitzvah. That separate fund, I'm the funder, I'm the donor, I replenish it, I've got the capacity to do it, and I'm telling you don't hesitate to do it within my within my rules. Because those funds have rules and my rules 10 to 20%. But don't go over the rules, within my rules you have nothing to worry about. And if we still hesitate and worry, it is a gut check about how much we really live with emunah. A Gemara told a הפסד אנשי אמנה בחורבן, the הפסד אנשי אמנה בחורבן בית המקדש, שהוא מקום הגילוי של עולם העליון בעולם הזה, כך ניתן להבין את מה שאמרו באושא התקינו המבזבז אל יבזבז יותר מחומש. Why was this happening? Why was this harder after the churban Beis HaMikdash? What did the Gemara say? That once the Beis HaMikdash was destroyed, we lost the kind of people who so happily and readily give for mitzvah, Shabbos, Yom Tov, and tzedakah. Why? Why did we get this little hesitation, this little hiccup, this little delay, this little— Will I have enough? What does that have to do with the *Churban Bais Hamikdash*? Because what was the *Bais Hamikdash*? *Giluy Shechina*. The *Bais Hamikdash* was the intense accessibility to *Hashem*. The intense experience of being in the presence of *Hashem*. *Bais Hamikdash* had ten miracles a day that happened there. *Bais Hamikdash* was a place that you came with confidence, *Bais Hamikdash* was a place that you came with absolute knowledge that there is *Hashem* and He has a plan. And with the absence of the *Bais Hamikdash*, in that vacuum, the *Chilul*, the *Chilul Hashem*, that *Chalal*, that absence, that *Churban*, then now there is doubt and uncertainty and delay and hesitation and wonder. How could it be? How could it be? As Orit described last night, she sat on a bed getting up from *Shiva* after one of her fourteen terrible losses. Unbelievable woman. Unbelievable *Emunah*. Unbelievable speech presentation. But she sat there and she felt that moment: *Hashem*, where are You? And how could You? And enough already. How many times? How many people? How am I meant to continue on? How? That is a *Churban Bais Hamikdash*. When we had a *Bais Hamikdash*, it did not mean that nobody died, there was not illness and tragedy and loss, it meant we could go there and we could feel that there is a bigger plan. There is a master plan and there is a creator and there is a source and somehow it all makes sense. And we would go to the *Bais Hamikdash* and we would be comforted and we would get confidence and we could walk away having resolved that uncertainty and doubt. And where do we go now? And what do we do now when there is a *Churban Bais Hamikdash*? But we read more of these stories of soldiers who *Rachmana Litzlan* are killed, of families who are sitting *Shiva*, please God there should be no more, of friends who are overcoming illness or waiting to have their child or looking to get married and living in loneliness and we say *Hashem*, where? That is all *Churban Bais Hamikdash*. It is *Chodesh Tammuz*, it is the month of *Tammuz* and as I said, please God we won't have a three weeks this year, but if we do, this is the mood and the mentality is that where? All of that is a result, that doubt, that uncertainty, that pain, that feeling of why and that it is random and that it does not have to be and that it does not make sense is all *Churban*, is all *Churban*. So included in that *Churban* of doubt and uncertainty and where are You and why is also and I don't want to give and how could I give and will I have enough? Will I have enough? Financial insecurity, financial anxiety. A lot of marriages suffer a lot of tension. There are three things that most couples fight over, which all the data shows, and one of them is money. I'll let you guess the other two because not you have it, *Chas V'shalom*, but you've heard from your neighbors. So one of them is financial. People fight over money and often it is because one of the members of the couple come from a background that had financial insecurity. And if you grew up not knowing where the food would be on your table, if you grew up with hand-me-down clothing, if you grew up where you packed away all those leftovers and you never threw food out because you didn't know if you'd had enough, it is hard to not take that into your marriage no matter how much you have. And it creates a lot of tension sometimes or a person cannot accept that they are comfortable even when they are and they live in such a way that creates this anxiety. But that financial insecurity is all *Churban Bais Hamikdash* also because if we really believe that there is *Hashem* and He provides and we have what we need and we will always be okay, then we'd never feel financial insecurity. Yeah, we'd have to figure out sometimes how we're going to pay the bill. But if we really believe that the food that we have is like the *Man* that falls from *Shamayim* and it will fall for us and we will always have what we need and we will have enough and we will get by, then we would never panic because we know He will always provide. It does not mean that there won't be stressful moments and challenges and that it will be pleasant to get the bills in the mail, but it means that we will live with confidence. All that is *Churban Bais Hamikdash*. So where did they establish? Where was it that התקינו המבזבז אל יבזבז יותר מחומש גמרא כתובות דף נ? That when you give away for a *Mitzvah*, what you spend on a *Mitzvah*, and you're not allowed to spend more than a *Tzedakah* you give, you can't spend more than 20% of your of your worth. Why? אושא היא המקום שאליו גלתה סנהדרין אחר חורבן ירושלים. *Usha* was the city in Israel, the place that the *Sanhedrin*, the High Court, were exiled to after the destruction of the *Bais Hamikdash*. When the *Bais Hamikdash* stood, when the temple stood, our High Court, our Supreme Court, the *Sanhedrin* sat in the *Bais Hamikdash* because for us law is not independent of religion. The *Sanhedrin* was in the *Bais Hamikdash*, our law is a religious law and it is divinely inspired and our legal scholars are our Supreme Court justices are endowed with divine insight to reach their conclusions, but when the *Bais Hamikdash* was destroyed, where was the Supreme Court exiled to? To the city of *Usha*. So אושא מקומו שאמרו מיבנה לאושא, they went from the city of *Yavne* to *Usha*. וקודם חורבן בית המקדש היו אנשי אמנה בלב שלם הם מבזבזים ממונם למצוות המצליחים. So before then they would give even more than 20% away for doing *Mitzvos*. Even on the mezuzahs, they buy the nice ones, the nice tefillin. You could buy tefillin, I get that question also, my kid's bar mitzvah. I called the sofer. There are daka, there are small tefillin, there are there are the, I don't want to name cars because I don't want to insult anyone, but there are the this kind of car and there's that kind of car of tefillin and of mezuzahs. There's the old iPhone and there's the newest model iPhone of tefillin and of mezuzahs l'havdil. So before the churban Beis Hamikdash, people always spent on the nicest when it came to a mitzvah. When it came to a mitzvah, and they weren't afraid why because they knew that Hashem provides, he takes care, he's the funder, he's the provider. But after churban Beis Hamikdash and they saw the panic in Usha, they had to enact a rule: Don't give more than 20%. מכיון שמי שבאמת מאמין בהקדוש ברוך הוא הקדוש ברוך הוא נאמן לו ולא יחסר לו דבר. If you really trust and believe in Hashem, then Hashem comes through for you and you have nothing to worry about. But if you have uncertainty and doubt, if you have anxiety, if you're dealing with financial insecurity, then they established in order to protect, in order to comfort, the 20% rule. אך אחר שחרב בית המקדש ראו חכמים לתקן שהמבזבז אל יבזבז יותר מחומש שכן פעולה כזו יכול לעשות רק מי שמאמין באמת ולא כמעשה חיצוני מכיון שפסקו אנשי אמנה היו בני אדם שהמשיכו בהנהגה זו כלפי חוץ אך לאחר חורבן נסתתרה ההנהגה שמעל הטבע לכך תקנו שלא יבזבז יותר מחומש. We lost the anshei amana. We lost those special people. We lost that capacity. Those who are able to live life, even financially, and say I'm not worried. What I spend on my lulav and esrog and my sukkah, what I spend on my Shabbos table, what I give to tzedaka, I have no fear. There's no anxiety or insecurity about Hashem will take care and provide. That confidence, that courage, that was lost with the churban. But you see from here, we'll read this last paragraph and end there. Geder ha'emunah hu. Says Rav Moshe Shapiro, you see from here that the definition of emunah, שאחר שהבין האדם שיש מציאות שמעבר למציאותו עליו להאמין בו לסמוך עליו. If you live only in the here and now and you live only with the number it says in your bank account, then you're living only in the here and now, you're not living with him. You're not living with him. If you want to live a life of emunah, if you want to live a life of emunah, then your whole view, the filter through which you see the world and interpret the world and experience the world will be altogether different. It's what we've been talking about for years now. First of all, your filter of I'm never stuck. If you live without an emunah filter, then when your flight's delayed or cancelled, or when you're stuck somewhere, you're stuck. But if you live with the emunah filter, you're never stuck. You are where you're meant to be and now figure out why, what you're meant to do there, what is your mission. But you're never ever stuck. And it's such a good filter because the other filters bring anxiety and angst and all kinds of blood pressure issues and health issues and emotional issues and the filter of emunah that lets you see everything and say I'm not stuck, and I'll have enough, and this is what I'm meant to spend it on, and it will all be good. Wow. What a filter. Now I'm at peace, now I'm at peace and I have calm and I have my mental, physical, emotional health and my relationships are all enhanced and enriched. What a filter! You know how much the filter costs? Nothing. You know what you need to do to qualify for it? Nothing. You know who can get it, who has a right to download it? Everyone. So don't wait, just download that filter and look at the world and see it and the people in it and the relationships in it and your bank account in it through that filter of emunah. באמונה האדם יכול לחבר את עצמו אליו. Through emunah we can attach ourselves to him. ולתפוס ולהבין שהמציאות היא כפי שהוא יתברך עושה לא כפי שהדברים נראים אצלו. And you can accept through that filter, we have the capacity to get a glimpse that the world is operating the way that he wants, not according to me. Mekablim b'ahavah. I wish that person were still here. That's my plan. I want this thing to happen on my schedule. The building of this campus, or of my house, or of this renovation. I want to go travel, I want, I want things to happen my way. When I get married or when I have a child or when this tefillah will be answered. But when we look through that filter we realize I make my efforts, I take my initiative, I do my part, but in the end of the day it's up to him. הקדוש ברוך הוא מסדר את הדברים ואני מאמין בו. He organizes and orchestrates everything and I trust and I surrender to him. באופן זה אדם שם עצמו מציאות גבוהה יותר. Now you're living at a whole other level. Everybody else is living down here and you're living up here. Everybody else is living down here and you're living up here. And you're living up here. אחר שהכיר וידע שזו האמת. After you see and you know that this is the truth. You know this past Shabbos, Avi Kahn spoke, fought in Gaza for many months, survived near misses. left his wife and had to escape out of Gaza to be present at the birth of his first child. There was a beautiful article on Times of Israel about it if you want to read it. And he spoke at our off the record on Shabbos morning and he said as a religious soldier he said he feels bad for the non-religious soldiers with whom he interacts and in his unit and so on. He said because he walked us through the challenges and the difficulty and the losses that he experienced in this war how horrific the pain the sacrifice he said but the religious soldiers all know how this ends. Those were his words. We know how this ends. This is Hashem he's in charge he's in control there's a purpose there's a plan there's a geulah there's a redemption. We know how it ends and we know what we're fighting for and we know that he's got our back. And these were his words he said those who don't have that they're only fighting about tactics and weapons and strategy and casualties and numbers. And if that's all you're living is in the north they have this how many rockets and who's backing them and what are they doing and tragically Rachmanah litzlan two civilians killed yesterday how many have been killed and you're living down here. We also have to live down here the religious soldiers don't say no thanks I don't need a weapon I have Chovot HaLevavot Sha'ar HaBitachon. They say yes I need a weapon and thank you for replenishing my ammo of course they also live down here but they choose to not only live down here they also live up here. There's something bigger going on there's someone bigger watching over and there is a bigger plan and we know how this ends and now we have to go do our part. That's our mission that's how the soldiers are living. Who am I to disagree with him but one could argue that there's no such thing as a non-religious soldier right now because my experience in five trips to Israel since October and going to army bases is that without a kippah having never put on tefillin never observe Shabbos in their lives are some of the most religious soldiers. Religious soldiers not only because there's no atheists in a foxhole because October 7th woke up the pintele Yid and the sleeping Jew and the October 8th Jew knows what we're fighting for and that there is someone and something and something. So maybe maybe one can argue there's no such thing as a secular soldier as a secular soldier fighting this fight. But we are also soldiers in our lives soldiering on in the fight that we're fighting whatever it is that we're overcoming. And we too are meant to not only live down here what was the lab report what did the doctor say we're meant to not only live down here what does it say my bank account what did my financial advisor warn me. We're not meant to live down here that says what happened with the flight is it delayed we're meant to live up here. How do you get from down here to up here mekablam b'ahava. How do you get from down here to up here put on that filter see that world through the filter of emunah the emunah filter. I wish it were so easy that in the App Store we could download it I wish it were that easy it takes work but it's well worth it he'emanti ki adaber when we speak about Hashem then we find that faith and we find Hashem. B'ofen zeh adam let's finish up אחרי שהכיר וידע שזאת האמת אחרי זה בא אמונה. Once we know this is the truth this is the reality we can live with this emunah הקובע האמת היא המציאות שבה אני חי ככה האמת על החיים הפשוטים שלי. That's how the truth can find itself into my simple life into each and every one of our simple lives this emes that there is a God finds its way in through the emunah that we live with. And the emunah that we live with doesn't happen in this room in this shul. Yeah the shul is a place that we come to talk to Hashem it's a place that we come to learn Torah and go to shiur but that's not the laboratory of emunah the battlefield of emunah. It's easy that's where you open the siddur and you davven shacharis you learn you listen you volunteer. The place of emunah is real life Hachayim hapeshtutiyim sheli in my simple real life how do we react. From the little things like the wifi went down to the big things like a Shiva home and hanging a sign mekablam b'ahava. That's the the battlefield that's the laboratory that's where we live with the emes manifest through the emunah by putting on that filter and seeing it in that way and what a better life it is what a more meaningful life it is. And we have people to lean on who are our hotspots that when we buffer and we waver and we don't have bandwidth and we feel I don't know where you are and I have doubt. Orit last night go find her online and listen. She is apparently very popular on Instagram did she say go listen to her messages go follow she is a hotspot of emunah direct connection high speed. What she's been through I challenge others to match not that we compare everyone's different but what she's been through and she is an absolute high speed hotspot of emunah. And there are others just a couple weeks ago I interviewed the Zimbalists who lost their son Adi Moshe in Gaza and you listen to them and others we've interviewed and had on Jen Airy others they're hotspots of emunah. When yours wavers when your filter begins to fade and you need to download it again and it's not downloading and you have to rely on somebody else's lean on the incredible people we have incredible people there are incredible people around us and connect through them. And im yirtzeh hashem we will so that the next time we meet, by the time we're back from our vacation, we'll meet im yirtzeh hashem in yerushalayim, celebrating the arrival of moshiach. Please God until then we should hear and have besoros tovos. Please stay for all of tehillim. We're going to complete all of tehillim, it'll take only two minutes. Tonight's Behind the bima, Douglas Murray, great conversation with Douglas Murray. And we also, last, we have incredible car magnets that say I Stand With Israel, an American flag, Israel flag, or actual flags on the car became challenging. It's a great big magnet, put it on your car. Suggested donation to help us cover the cost, but if you don't want, just take it, if you'll put it on your car. They're available right now, go grab them, and until next time may we have besoros tovos.
