Transcript
Good morning *Boker Tov*, *Shavua Tov*, good morning for *Klal Yisrael*, *Am Yisrael*, we should hear *Besoros Tovos*, *Yeshuos*, and *Nechamos*. Please God, the hostages should all be brought home, our soldiers should return to their families, and we should hear about a sweeping victory in the south, in the north, and all around. I want to thank our incredibly generous sponsors for our *Emunah Shiur*, Dr. Zavi and Bella Morgan in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut and in memory of Bella's mother Dr. Ellen Shanzer. Also our learning should be for a *Refuah Sheleimah*, a young girl in our community still urgently is in need of a *Refuah Sheleimah*. We *daven* from the bottom of our hearts she should have a complete speedy *Refuah Sheleimah*, יעל שושנה בת חנה פרידל. Everyone's invited as always to remain afterwards to please finish all of *Sefer Tehillim*. The more that stay, the more times we can finish all *Sefer Tehillim* in just a few minutes for so many reasons that are needed. And a couple other housekeeping quick announcements. Our amazing *Emunah* cups, I actually make my first cup of coffee every day in the morning from it, and every morning we have our morning *Kollel* very early and I look, caffeinate with *Kavana*, *Shehakol Nihiyeh Bidvaro*, it reminds me, it's really wonderful. We're actually ordering more cups, so if anybody would like to buy, we're offering you can buy sleeves of these cups, use them at your home, remind yourself and your family to make your first cup of coffee, caffeinate with *Kavana*, *Shehakol Nihiyeh Bidvaro*, everything, *Hakadosh Baruch Hu* creates the world, the ambiance, everything in it, *Shehakol*, everything is from *Hashem*. So if you'd like to order a sleeve or several sleeves or sponsor the cups for the *shul*, you can be in touch with Lee, l-e-e at brsonline.org and she has all the details. This *Motzei Shabbos* we're hosting Rabbi Krohn, Rabbi Pesach Krohn will be back at BRS, 8:30 here in the main sanctuary, all are invited. And that is just one example of the incredible programming, classes, learning opportunities BRS hosts, which is why next week we will be having our annual BRS Global campaign. For those who are not members of Boca Raton Synagogue but benefit regularly, and we know you want the opportunity to express your gratitude and to partner and to empower and to enable us to continue to teach and share and promote *Torah*, so we want to help you. And so we are launching our campaign next week, but if you'd like to in advance help us get started with momentum, brsonline.org/global, brsonline.org/global. *Emunah* emails, got a couple of emails and then we'll dive back into the text that we were learning together, back into *Emunah* together. Dear Rabbi, I was laid off from a job a month ago. I have a wife and a daughter and it really hurt. I've been living in a daze and I've been taking it quite personally. I'm a giver, not a taker, I give to my community, my wife and daughter, and I really hate taking. I've been learning *Shaar HaBitachon*, *Rabbeinu Bachya*, *Chovos HaLevavos*, *Shaar HaBitachon* since *Rosh Hashanah*, and I'll say that when faced with a real *yissurin*, with real challenges, there is a question and answer dialectic. I wake up with despair and questions only to have to answer with *Emunah* and *Bitachon*. In other words, he's revealing what all of us go through, the inner conversations we have with ourselves where our instinct is panic, fear, anxiety, worry, and then we have to kick in the *Emunah* *Bitachon* muscle that says relax, there's a plan, He's in charge, He's in control, surrender to Him, go along for the ride. Sometimes the questions are stronger than the answer, while there are other times the answers are stronger than the question, it's an ongoing battle. I meditate on the struggles of *Bereishis*, the *Geulah* of *Mitzrayim*, the *Purim* story, to quote Chanan Ben Ari, וגם אני חולם כמו יוסף, and then he quotes a whole lyric from Chanan Ben Ari that I'm not familiar with. I will be following up with you in a couple of days, please God, when I find a job. That's how he signs his email. Why am I sharing this email? Because first of all someone took the trouble to write it, and I think it's very raw and it's very real and it's very reflective. And what do I always say? It doesn't say, and then as I wrote the email, I just got word I got a job and it's a better job than the last job and it pays more than the last job and it's the best thing in the world I got fired because now, he says, I don't have a job. I don't know how I'm paying the bills. I don't know why right now I have to be a taker, I like to be a giver. I'll be in touch soon, hopefully I'll have better news. But that's still *Emunah* and *Bitachon*. *Emunah* and *Bitachon* is not only when it all worked out amazingly well, when it all worked out right, of which we have those stories, of which we have those stories too. Here's one from my brother-in-law. Went to Israel during *Yeshiva* week, father-son mission, and there was an amazing story. He went *Motzei Shabbos* through New York. He likes adventures. So he went *Motzei Shabbos* through New York, and to make that connection, *Shabbos* did not end early here, and yet to make the connection to get out of New York, his flight was delayed. And he had to pull an OJ through the airport and run. Anyone know what I'm talking about? He had to run, thank you, okay. He didn't murder an ex-wife in the airport, I'm saying he had to run through the airport. I'm not saying he did it. I'm just saying I'm not sure he didn't do it. But that's not the point right now. Anyway, if it doesn't fit, you must acquit. I'm not that's not the point right now. The point is he had to run through the airport and and he was delayed and panic will he make it and not make it and what and why why Hashem you know he's going for a good thing to Israel to volunteer to support to help father son mission why why the delay why the why the frustration why the panic. And then on the second leg of his flight sorry then on that flight he met someone he knows. So and so and her husband were in Boca on vacation were coming back for a funeral in Eretz Sunday their sister-in-law's father passed away. They got the news after Shabbos. They didn't see any flights they could take except the 8:15 Delta from Palm Beach but it was already after seven they wouldn't make it. Said maybe if it gets delayed we can make it. So they check again and sure enough it's now a 9:30 departure they hustle to the airport. Hashem has all the cheshbonos and calculates everything. 9:30 was enough time for them to make it so they get to the funeral and enough time for me and my son to make our El Al connection they made it to Israel. So sometimes yeah the luggage didn't but sometimes sometimes we get the but it wasn't anyway going to make it. Sometimes we get the answer in real time sometimes there's the amazing ending. We were delayed I didn't know why it's because they made it to the funeral they made it to the funeral we made it to Israel and all ends well. And other times we don't have the new job yet or we didn't meet the shidduch yet or we didn't get pregnant with the baby yet and we don't have the happy we don't have the ending we don't know the way the story ends. That's real emuna that's real bitachon that's real bitachon. If you don't know by now I'm frustrated by those who try to inspire and build bitachon only with the stories where everything works out. And the reason that I get frustrated by that is because then if the story doesn't work out for you I have no bitachon and no emuna. It didn't have that ending it didn't work out. So therefore I guess he doesn't love me I guess there's no God I guess there wasn't a plan. So our emuna and bitachon is not because it's not transactional. It's not transactional it's not conditional. It's not if I believe in him then it'll work out the way I want. We learned way back when before most of you ever heard of me or Living with Emuna we learned the Chazon Ish's Emuna Bitachon one of the first things we we learned way back when before we had Caffeinate with Kavana cups. We learned the Chazon Ish's Emuna Bitachon and there the Chazon Ish defines you know what emuna and bitachon are? People think you know what bitachon is bitachon is I have faith Hashem is going to make it work out the way I want. I have faith I have faith it's going to come through. I have faith the person's going to get better I have faith the shidduch's going to work out I have faith I'll get the job I have faith my every I have faith the way it's going to work out the way I want. And the Chazon Ish writes that's not emuna that's not bitachon. That's not faith in God that's faith in yourself. You think here are all the initiatives and steps I take for the outcome I want and one of them is faith in God and I can check it off. I went to the doctor I work out at the gym I dieted I did the job interview I whatever initiative whatever arena whatever area of life and emuna bitachon are just another checkbox. And if I do it then I'm still in charge and I'm still in control because as long as I checked all the box I get the result I want. That's not emuna bitachon that's not surrender submitting that's not faith in God that's faith in your interpretation of the world and what you want to have happen and what you think is best for you and that's not faith. Faith is Hashem and this is the ongoing conversation. Hashem from my limited finite mere mortal perspective I think this job would be really great for me. From my mere mortal finite perspective I think this shidduch would be great I hope it works out. From my mere mortal finite perspective I think this outcome I desire and want so bad is what's best for me. But if you disagree let's go with your your decision. Because you're omnipotent you're infinite you're all-knowing you're all-powerful you are the source of all of existence and everything you do is for my best. Doesn't mean it's not painful. It could be painful but painful is different than bad. Painful things happen to good people bad things don't happen to good people because all that God does is good. Sometimes we know the good this is why I got delayed so they could make the funeral. And sometimes we don't know why it was good and all we experience is the pain of it but it's never bad because it's all from God and it's all by definition good. It could be painful but it's never bad. But real emuna and bitachon says the Chazon Ish the definition of bitachon is Hashem here's the way I hope and want and will work for it to work out and if it doesn't I know whatever happened is from you is not random is not chance is for the best. We're now in the month of Adar. There are two Adars. משנכנס אדר מרבין בשמחה. You can go through each week and day and month of the year and think you're going to be in a wrestling match with God. Who's in charge who's in control who's right who sees the world the way it should be and you're just wrestling with God. You just want a different outcome you just want a different result you just want credit and you want responsibility and you want the glory or the blame. You're just in a wrestling match or you could let go and let God. Mishenichnas Adar doesn't mean when you enter the month of Adar, it means when Adar enters you. Mishenichnas Adar, when Adar enters into us, Adar is aleph dalet resh, the Aluf, the one and only, the Almighty, the Hashem Echad, the Aleph, the one dar, he has a dira betachtonim, he has a dwelling place down here on earth. It means that everything that happens, everything that happens, everything that happens is from above. Everything that happens is from above. I was listening to a podcast the other day, someone was telling a story and said, "You know, the difference of life or death can sometimes be your shoelace." He was telling a story. His shoelace became untied, he took one second more in his house to tie his shoe, which meant he left the house a second later, which meant he missed that intersection by a second, which meant he missed that accident that he could have been t-boned, a direct collision that could have cost his life. We don't know, all day long, whether the shoelace became untied, stayed tied, the red light, the green light, the delay, the on time, all the different variables of our lives from when we wake up in the morning until we fall asleep at night, to have emunah bitachon is to realize it's all, none of it's random or chance. That's the voice of Amalek. All of Adar we're fighting Amalek. Haman was Amalek, the story of Purim is Amalek, the attempted extermination of the Jews of Shushan was from Haman was from Amalek. Amalek, the original Amalek is asher korcha baderech. Korcha is milashon mikreh, mikreh means chance, happenstance. So when you go through life and you say, "It's just chance, it was a chance encounter, it was a chance that I tied my shoelace or the intersection, it was chance that we missed the flight." It's all random and chance and happenstance and it just happened to be, coincidences, that's the voice of Amalek. And we're fighting that voice of Amalek inside ourselves. זכור את אשר עשה לך עמלק. Don't ever forget what Amalek does to us when they attack us with the pernicious attack of chance, happenstance, randomness. We're victims of randomness. You know what randomness leads to? Hopelessness and helplessness. I don't know how the people who go through life thinking everything's random. You know, there's just... I'm not saying it's easy, but chalila God forbid someone's diagnosed with an illness, because you say, "Well, statistically this number of people will get this illness, and I guess it's just a random unlucky chance I'm the lucky winner or someone I loved was the lucky winner and got that illness." And it's just random and it's just chance and it's just data and it's just statistics. I don't know, that's the most depressing thought in the entire world to me. And the other thought that says, "I don't understand it, I reject it, I protest, I beg, I plead, I daven, I take every initiative under the sun to stop it, to fight it, to overcome it, but in the end of the day, nothing is random." Now there's meaning, now there's purpose, now there's hope because there's something that's beyond the here and now. And there's a meaning and a purpose to whatever that pain because it was part of a bigger plan. If it's just random and chance and happenstance, there was no plan, it just happened to you. So how do you live? How do you go on living? How do you find hope and resilience and perseverance and tenacity? And when you say everything is part of a bigger plan, and sometimes we'll see it and sometimes we won't, but it's all for a purpose. So now I have the hope and the strength and the resilience to overcome and to persevere. And that's a message our children desperately, desperately, desperately need. Resilience. Resilient. This world is throwing at them and us things we never dreamt of or anticipated, could have never predicted, and it's going to be survival of those who have resilience, those who have resolve, those who have strength. And where do we get our resilience and our strength from? Where does it come from? It comes from emunah u'bitachon. It comes from the calmness and the serenity and the tranquility and the inner peace of hishtavus. Hishtavus, שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד, of equanimity. You know, life has moments of joy. If we're making a simcha, we're going to sing and dance and be happy and smile. If we get great news, we're going to be elated, it's filled with simcha. And if there's loss, we're going to sit, we're going to cry, we're going to grieve, and we're going to be sad. But even while experiencing that range, still there's a equanimity, a hishtavus, because shivisi, it's all from Hashem. The simcha's from Hashem, and כשם שמברך על הטוב כך מברכין על הרע. The Gemara tells us, a Mishna tells us, that the same energy and the same attitude that we brought to say, "Ah, the simcha, thank you Hashem, a million times thank you Hashem, we're so grateful Hashem," you know, every Hashem and thank you, and at the aufruf and at the sheva brachos and at the vort and at the l'chaim, "Oh, Hashem, הודו לה' כי טוב כי לעולם חסדו. Thank you Hashem, thank you Hashem, thank you Hashem." Nobody ever gets up at a funeral and says, "הודו לה' כי טוב כי לעולם חסדו." כשם שמברך על הטוב כך מברכין על הרע. out of the doctor's office with a diagnosis, הודו לה' כי טוב כי לעולם חסדו. But that's what Chazal our rabbis are telling us is yes, the behind the tears and behind the smiles is the same equanimity, there's an inner peace, the inner peace of knowing it's not random, it's not chance. It's not random and chance that I've been zocheh that I've been merit and the privilege to have this nachas to have this simcha, not everybody does, many are waiting and longing, and when we get it, it wasn't random and it wasn't chance and you have to thank Hashem only through his graciousness. And equally and opposite on the other side. So Amalek, that voice that just says, eh, it's random, it's chance, chance you found that parking spot, it's chance your child find their bashert, it's chance that chas v'shalom that illness, that diagnosis came. That's the voice of Amalek, it is depressing, it is hopeless, it is a it just empties us of any energy or resilience, it's deflating, it's depleting. That's Amalek, they attack, Asher korcha baderech, that voice, it's attacking us. Random, chance, happenstance, statistics, data, it's attacking us, it's attacking us. And that's why zachor we have to remember, al tishkach, never forget what it can do to us, how it can drain and deplete and debilitate and paralyze and compromise and corrupt relationships, confidence, faith, energy, strength, will. It's attacking us, it's attacking. But when you live with faith, when we let go and let God, when we surrender to him, when we say nothing is chance and everything is from you, the happy moments, the sad moments, but there's an equanimity, hishtavus, hishtavus, it's all the same to me. Moshe Gerch's book, which really captures hishtavus, which is an ancient concept long precedes the Baal Shem Tov, goes back to Dovid HaMelech and earlier. This notion that my highs and my lows, my happiness and my sadness, they're real, we're meant to feel those emotions. כשם שמברכין על הרע על הטוב כך מברכין על הטוב על הרע, the same way that we say Hodu L'Hashem at a simcha and a sadness, doesn't mean don't feel sad. We the whole nihugei aveilus, sitting shiva is sad, sad, lean into the sadness, cry. But it means that behind the tears is not the hopelessness of it's chance and random and Amalek, it's that everything, I'm living a life of equanimity. I just I don't get bent out of shape. There's not the drama of the rise and the fall, the panic, the fear, the drama, the anxiousness, the and then we're able to not live a spiritually bipolar life. We're not living a spiritual multiple personality life. There's not the drama of the highs and the lows, there's an equanimity, a calm. I'm calm while I'm crying because crying is a human emotion of grief and sadness that's appropriate, that's reasonable, that's right, that's an expression of loss, that's correct. Rambam says to not grieve is cruel, it's cruel, I'm not cruel, I feel. But behind the tears there's a calm, there's the calm of this was all part of a plan, it's painful, it hurts, it hurts so badly, but there's a plan, there's a plan. And similarly with the happiness and with the joy and with the highs, I'm going to sing and dance and smile and be happy and joyful and elated, but there's an equanimity behind it is also not, it's all from Hashem, it's all from Hashem. That's real bitachon says the Chazon Ish. The real bitachon is the statement not that I'm confident Hashem will make it turn out the way I want, that's faith in yourself not faith in God. Faith in God is however it turns out I know it's from him. Here's how I hope it turns out, here's how I'll be working for it to turn out, here's how I want it to turn out, but however it turns out I know it's from him. That's faith, that's faith. So the emails that come in that say, ha, it turned out the way I wanted it, you see, he's amazing, I love him, he's great, that's not bitachon. That's just it turned out the way you want, that's easy bitachon, that's easy bitachon. The bitachon that says I don't yet know how it's going to turn out, but I know and I trust it's all from him. Or it turned out not the way I wanted and not the way I hoped, a very powerful email to share with you next week, very painful powerful email of an incredible demonstration of it didn't turn out the way I wanted the way we wanted, and yet somehow I also still know that it's all from him. That's emunah, that's bitachon. And if our emunah and bitachon is predicated and built on it will turn out the way I want, we're setting ourselves up for a disaster and a failure and a meltdown. But if all along what we're working on, the emunah muscle that we're building, the Sha'ar HaBitachon that we're learning, the gate of bitachon that we're building within us is preparing us for when chas v'shalom it won't turn out exactly the way we want, we say it's no problem, hishtavus, equanimity, I'm still calm, you know why? I never felt entitled for it to turn out the way I want. I never expected it would all always go the way I want. I know that there's a bigger purpose and a bigger plan and there's something more. One more email. Boy, do I have a story for Rabbi Goldberg, exclamation point, exclamation point, exclamation point. Subject line: Yad Hashem. I was at Target doing a return before picking up my new glasses. They messed up on a return and could not do an exchange on a return, so the lady said, "Here, miss, here's a $15 gift card." I felt bad because that was worth more than the return, but she was happy to make the customer happy for the mistake. And let's assume for a moment she was empowered to do that. I go to pick up my new glasses at Target Optical and after my insurance, my copay was exactly $15, the exact amount I was just gifted. What does one do with glasses? They see. Because I literally see Yad Hashem in everything, Hashem gave me these glasses for free. Because I see Hashem in everything, Hashem gave me the glasses for free to see Him. So again, you could walk out... you know what Amalek says in Target? First of all, Amalek says in Target: keep buying things that you can't afford and go into debt, and that looks so good, and you don't need it but you should have it, you deserve it. That's Amalek all over Target, but that's whatever, that's a different Amalek. But you know what Amalek says in Target? Amalek says in Target that what a coincidence! Ha! $15 gift card, $15 copay, what a coinkydink! What a coincidence! Isn't life filled with coincidence? That's Amalek. And you know what the Baal Bitachon says, the author of this email, she says, she says, "I'm putting on my new glasses, I see Hashem everywhere." It wasn't a coincidence. Hashem gave me the glasses for free. $15, $15, Hashem gave it to me. We can see it all around us. We see it for free. And that's our mission and our mandate: go defeat Amalek. Amalek's in us. Yeah, was never fully defeated, he's still fighting in each and every one of us, that voice, that voice of Amalek. What Rav Hutner describes, the Koach HaChilul. Rav Hutner writes that there are two voices: Koach HaHillul and Koach HaChilul. What's the difference between Chilul and Hillul? Koach HaChilul is like Chulin. Chulin, Chulin is secular, profane, mundane. Nothing is impressive, nothing is awesome, nothing is wow, nothing is the Yad Hashem. It's all just "Yeah, that's nature. That's coincidence. Them's... that's statistics." That's Koach HaChilul. Everything is a big fat "eh". "Eh" is a new word, the next generation. So, "Isn't that amazing?" "Eh." "What'd you think of dinner?" "Eh." "What'd you think of the concert?" "Eh." "What'd you think of the rabbi?" Big "eh". Disappointment, I heard so many great things about him and what an "eh". "Eh", I... we never had that in our... that was not part of our vocabulary. When I was growing up, we didn't have that in our vocabulary. I certainly didn't hear it from my parents or grandparents. Anything with E-H, "eh". I think that's how you spell "eh". All the time. "Oh, what'd you think of the new...?" "Eh. Eh. It was okay. It was okay." You know how hard it is to impress young people? Nothing impresses them. "Did you hear about the miracle and the rescue and the...?" "Eh. Eh. Eh. Okay. Yeah, okay." That's Koach HaChilul, that's the voice of Amalek. You know what Klal Yisrael say, Am Yisrael say? Koach HaHillul. Hillul as Hallel is "Wow! That's amazing! Hold on, I gotta sit down. Tell me again what happened? They rescued? They went in? Covert? They practiced? All sides? Nobody was injured? Nobody was harmed? Nobody was hurt? Nobody was killed? Tell me... Wow! Hashem is amazing! The soldiers are amazing! The courage is amazing! The hostages are... Hashem is amazing!" That's what... "Hashem is amazing! He's awesome!" But like the real word awesome, awesome, awe-inspiring, awesome. Amalek, Koach HaChilul, "eh". "It's okay. Yeah, it's alright. Whatever. Whatever." That's Amalek. Klal Yisrael or Koach Ha... amazing! Amazing! Hashem is awesome! Did you see that view? Did you see that sunset? Did you... Did you hear what happened? I was delayed so someone could get to a funeral? "Yeah, okay," versus "Wow! That's amazing! Hashem orchestrates everything! It's amazing!" So which one will win? Which voice is gonna play in our head? Which voice do we mute and silence, and which one do we turn up the volume on? The Koach HaChilul, the "eh, it's okay, yeah", or the Koach HaHillul, "Wow! It's awesome! That's amazing! That's amazing!" That's all up to us. Back to where we were last week. Last week we were interrupting our general learning. We've been learning Rav Chaim Shmuelevitz on the Yom Kippur War, the Sichos that he gave in the Mir Yeshiva. We interrupted that to learn רב איטשע מאיר מארגענשטערן on Shovavim, the purpose of Shovavim. Last week we spoke about Shmiras Habris, the covenant, the Bris, the promise we made with ourselves to let the light shine through, to peel back the coverings, the layers, the shells, the Klipah that's covering it. Anyone remember what I'm talking about? Last week, okay, good, Boruch Hashem, Boruch Hashem. And we didn't finish last week, and we spoke about every one of us is in our own personal Mitzrayim. Mitzrayim is the place of meitzar yam, the yam hachochma, that sea of wisdom, the knowledge that we have, the light, the access, the revelation, the knowledge that we live with, that we're in a world where everything's carefully curated, choreographed, Hakadosh Baruch Hu's in charge, that we get blinded, meitzar, there's there are boundaries, there's a siege around that world, that knowledge, and meitzar, Mitzrayim is is a world of constriction, the world is closing in, it's caving in, the roof is falling down, that we we can feel that way, we can feel that way, there's a Mitzrayim, and we're looking to be liberated and freed and emancipated and saved from our own personal Mitzrayim. You ever have that, your blood pressure's going up and and you can't breathe, you can't breathe, because it just feels like it's all it's all it's overwhelming, it's all overwhelming, it's all just it's all just the list of emails, the list of phone calls, what you have to prepare, what you have to do, and coming from this side and coming from that side, you have to take care of your parents, you have to take care of your children, it's all just Mitzrayim, it's all just closing in, caving in on all sides, it's coming in, it's coming in, and you say to yourself, what's going to be, what's going to be, what's going to be, how am I, what's going to be, what's the way out, how do I get out, it's a it's all just closing in and caving in, that's our own personal Mitzrayim. ובכן שיש להם מבט מצומצם והשכל שלו מסתכל על כל דבר בצמצום ומיצר, we're on the left side page samech beis, 62, the middle of the page. ואינם מעמיקים לכן אינם תופסים שיש אור אלוקי שמחיה את הכל, so when we can't breathe, and when our blood pressure's going up, and when our sweat glands are pumping, and when we feel hyperventilating physically and spiritually, and it's all closing in and caving in, and the sky is falling, and what's going to be, and how are we going to get out, and we're not looking with clarity, we're not seeing the light, we're not peeling back the layers to let the light of Hashem shine through, כי כל דבר שאינם רואים בעיניהם הם לא מתיחסים אליו, because we're living some superficial surface life that anything we can't see with our eyes we don't think is real. Seeing is believing, we say to ourselves, and if I can't see it and I can't measure it, if I can't take a picture of it and post it, then it didn't happen, then it didn't happen. Yesterday we spoke in the parsha shiur about pictures at weddings. The Ramban says that the building of the Mishkan was the continuity of Har Sinai, and Rav Shmuel Berenbaum, Tiferes Shmuel, says the same way that you have a videographer and a photographer at a wedding because you want to revisit it, you want to relive it, you want to be back there at it, so so too, I said, you know, it's amazing, nobody, I said the parsha, nobody doesn't have pictures at their wedding. Some have a huge crew, some have a one person, who doesn't have, so someone stopped me this morning, a Vizhnitzer Chassid, apparently the Vizhnitzer Rebbe in Monsey said he'll only come to a wedding if there's no photographer, he made six weddings for his children, no photographer, no picture, you just have the experience without without someone sent me last night a video, Akiva Turgeman, the great singer, his his unit, his gedud was meshuchrar, was free, they're done with the army, they're sent home, they're done, and there was a big concert for the soldiers, Akiva and Ishay Ribo, it was beautiful, so someone sent me videos from it, and and I showed Yocheved, in the video, everybody's holding up their phone taking a video, so I was like, they're singing to an empty room, there's no one actually there, I'm guilty of this too, I'm making fun of myself, when you're at that thing, you're like, I gotta get a video of this, that concert, that moment, so they were actually singing to an empty room because nobody was experiencing it, nobody was present, everyone was just they should have just had one person, you take the video, send it to all of us, and let the rest of us just experience it, just be there, just be there, so we take a picture, we want to go back, we want to relive, we want to be able, so we think seeing is believing, if I could take a picture and post it, if I could put it on my status, it happened, if I can't put it on my status, I don't have the picture of it, it never happened, that's what we think, but says Rav Itche Meir, we're wrong, because there's a pnimiyus, it's not just superficial and surface, it's not just the things you could take a picture, the most real things don't come up in a picture, the most real things do not appear on a status, that moment, that feeling, that experience, that memory, that emotion, that doesn't come you can't you can't take a picture of that, that doesn't come up in a picture, AI can't do anything with that, that's the most real, the pnimiyus, the deep deep truth. והנה כאשר אדם נופל לקליפות רחמנא לצלן, and when a person falls prey to the shell, to the layers, to the covering, to the peel, וחושב שיש מציאות לטבע, and you think that there's a truth, there's there's actual nature, there's something called disease and nature and statistics and data and happenstance and randomness and chance, וכל שכן חושב שיש משהו טוב אצל הרע אזי הוא נסגר בתוך החומה של מצרים דהיינו בתוך הדמיון של הקליפות, when we live in this world, when we confuse the matrix for reality, the matrix that we're living in, and we confuse that this matrix, which is an illusion, it's really all a big... optical illusion, but the optical illusion of the matrix is so good that we think it's real. So statistics and nature and physical material things, it's so the illusion is amazing. Ever look through one of those optical illusion books? And you're like wow, really? That's just the drawing? It's not really 3D? And you're like blown away. A hologram, that's not real? You go grab to reach to touch it and it's not? It's so real, it looks so real. Wow. So too this world, it looks so real that we confuse the illusion of the matrix of this world with the reality, but it's not real. What's real? There is only one real. It's all only part of the imagination of Hashem. We are images within the ongoing imagination of Hashem. That's the only thing that's real. That's the only thing that's real. And when we're locked into the matrix and we think that the illusion, we confuse the illusion with what's real, then we are giving into the klipos. והנה הם משעבדים אותנו אותו בעבודה קשה בכל מיני עניינים. So what happens in Mitzrayim? When you're living in that place that you think that, but what do you mean Hashem has a plan? What do you mean look at the pnimius? What do you mean let go and let God? What do you mean submit and surrender? What do you mean have hishtavus, have a calm and an inner tranquility and an equanimity? What do you mean? But, but, but, but the bills are coming in, but the lab reports are coming in, but the child with the issues, but the shalom bayis problems, but the war, but what happened in Tzfas, but Lebanon now, what's going to be? What do you mean? Ah! What do you mean? That's the voice of klipos, that's the voice of Amalek. With all of it there's a hishtavus. Say my Tehillim, do my davening, take my mission to Israel. I've got to be healthy, I have to live healthy, I have to work on shalom bayis, I have to work... I have to do all my initiative, but underneath it all there's a calm. There's a calm. The greatest people I've ever met and I've been zocha to meet great people, there's a calm to them. There's a calm to them. Big rabbonim, big tzidkoniyos, big men, big women, people of great greatness, of great emunah, there's a calm. There's a calm to them. And so sometimes you think of course there's a calm to them, the whole world loves them, they're the biggest influencers, everybody's throwing money at them, everybody's lining up to go meet with them. Of course there's a calm, everything's easy and good for them, right? And then you learn about their lives. You know how many ailments and illnesses and disappointments and frustrations and yisurin they live with? Big people. Big rosh yeshiva recently here, children with special needs, shidduchim challenges because of that, despite being an enormous rosh yeshiva, there's big problems. And yet when you meet with them there's a calm. Why? Because the more that you live with Him, the more you surrender to Him, the more it empowers whatever we're going through, there's just a calm. There's an equanimity, there's a hishtavus. We don't indulge the klipos. The klipos are but, but, but, but what do you mean? That child or that issue, that challenge, that test, that problem, that, that bill, that... what do you mean? Those are all the voice of those klipos. And they're meshabdim osanu just like Mitzrayim. We couldn't even hear. Why? מקוצר רוח ומעבודה קשה. We couldn't hear the voice of Moshe, we couldn't hear the sound of our own liberation. Why? Because we were drowning in the avoda kasha. And so to us when we're in a place of Mitzrayim that the world, that everything's caving in on us because we're, we're confusing the illusion of the matrix with the reality that is all Hashem, then also we hyperventilate. We panic. We... לא שומעים מקוצר רוח ומעבודה קשה. We have a kotzer ruach and an avoda kasha. וגם מעמיסים עליו השתדלות יתירה בענייני טבע וגם מבלבלים את דעתו שלא ירגיש את הרוחניות. What happens? We overcompensate. We do too much initiative. Too much initiative. There's such a thing as too much initiative which could also be a lack of faith. Too much initiative because we're not hearing. Turn the page. עד שרחמנא ליצלן שוכח את תכליתו האמיתית until we forget our essence, our tachlis. ואת המטרה שבשבילה בא לעולם שהיא להכיר את השם יתברך ולהידבק בו. And the purpose for which we came to this world. You know why we're here? We're here to know He exists. We're here to take the pill that will make us see the reality and not the matrix, the illusion. That's why we're here. That's why He deposited us in this world. He said I'm putting you in this world and now we're going to play hide and seek and I'll see you later and you're the winner if you find Me. I'm depositing you in this world and it's tough. I'm really good at hiding, says Hashem. I'm really good at hiding. When there's a war and there are hostages, when there are rockets and an innocent person is killed in the holy city of Tzfas, I'm, I'm really good at hiding. I'm really good at hiding. And there'll be periods in your life where you find Me easily and periods in your life where you can't find Me anywhere where I'm hiding. And here's how you become a winner, when you look for Me and when you find Me. And that's your tachlis. That's your tachlis. I'm going to put you in a world of temptation with food and drink, a world of temptation of intimacy and physical connection. I'm going to put you in a world that you have to work and earn, I'm going to put you in a world of time, I'm going to put you in a world of confusion, and you know what? You've got to navigate it all and find me behind it all and in it all, and now go and seek. I'm hiding, seek, go, start. That's the matara, that's the tachlis, that's the essence and the purpose. וזהו עצמו פגם הברית כי על ידי שעשה עבירות ופרק מעליו עול הקדושה בזה הכריש והחשיך כאילו יש מציאות עצמות לקליפות כאילו כדאי לחפש דברים אחרים חוץ מהשם יתברך. When people act out in inappropriate ways, when they looked at inappropriate images and act out in inappropriate ways, it is in fact, and psychologists' research will tell you this, there's a longing for connection. It is an inappropriate application of a longing for connection. But inside that grossly inappropriate expression of the inner desire for a longing for connection is the nitzotz, is the spark of kedusha that is a longing for connection. And the degree to which a person indulges and acts out in inappropriate ways, looking at and acting out in inappropriate ways, it becomes a barrier and an obstacle to genuine connections, to what are the real connections, to what are the most appropriate connections with others and most of all with Hashem Yisborach. With Hashem Yisborach. It can be an inappropriate connection to food or alcohol or drugs. It can be an inappropriate connection to shopping or working or even exercise. I was praising someone the other day, you know, they look fantastic and they're working out and they're exercising, they're telling me, but they're like it's gotten to a point that it's a problem. So what do you mean? He said I'm addicted. I need my couple hours a day and I'm neglecting my family and other things. So of all the addictions, whatever, but it can also even exercise can become an addiction. So when we have a connection to something that in the core, in the root, the seed is good, there's a nitzotz, a spark of kedusha, but the expression, the manifestation of it, the application of it is inappropriate, it becomes a barrier and a block and an obstacle, a klipa, a shell, a peel that is covering the light of what is that inner connection that should be what is connecting us to Hashem. וכיוון שחושב כך אז ניתן להם כוח לשלוט עליו. These are very deep ideas and there's a lot more to say about them, but let's finish this piece. כי בדרך שאדם רוצה לילך מוליכין אותו. Hakadosh Baruch Hu takes us in whatever direction, down whatever path we reveal and we reflect we really want to be able to go. וכיוון שהוא בידם הם גורמים לו לשכוח עוד יותר מהשם יתברך ויוסיף ויוסיף לשכוח מהשם שיש מציאות לקליפות חס ושלום. So and then it becomes a pattern and a habit and a vicious cycle and we become sucked into that place because there is a counterfeit connection there, and that counterfeit connection draws us in to do it over and over, and the deeper we get into it, and the more of that counterfeit connection that we have, the harder it is to break away to go have the authentic connection that our soul is really yearning. If you know what I'm talking about, you know what I'm talking about, and if you don't, I'm sorry. ובכל זה יש הרבה מדריגות אבל כל אחד לפי מדריגתו ממש לא מצליח להרגיש כראוי. There are many different layers and many different levels of this. את אמיתת מציאות השם יתברך זה עצמו שיעבוד מצרים שהוא נמצא בו. So when we are enslaved to whatever addiction we have, for some it's going to Starbucks even though you can't afford it, Mani-Pedi even though you can't afford it, shopping beyond our means, going into deep debt because we are addicted to the latest fashion and style and lifestyle and behavior, and I have to have the latest tequila and the single malt, and I have to have the latest bottle of wine, whatever the indulgence. Whatever the indulgence. Addiction is not only the substances that have a stigma to them, there are other addictions that are unhealthy. And when we're drawn into that addiction, we are enslaved to it. We are enslaved to it. Usually I share this around Pesach time. This is what I think about in the month of Nissan going into Pesach sitting at that Seder because otherwise you say, we have freedom, we live in a great America, the democracy of America, how do we connect to slaves, slavery? And the answer is, open up on your phone your report on your screen time and tell me whether you're a slave or a free person. Show me your Amazon account and let's decide whether you're a slave or a free person. Let's look at your use of social media and let's see whether you're a slave or a free person. Let's look at your credit card statement and how many times you went to get your triple latte caramel upside down macchiato, whatever, whatever, whatever, and let's see whether you're a slave or a free person. Slavery is not just in handcuffs or bondage in Egypt. Slavery is when there is a pattern of behavior that we compulsively compulsively turn to and we can't stop ourselves or break free of it, we are enslaved, that's our Mitzrayim. That's our Mitzrayim because we think that there's a connection, we think that there's a pleasure, we think that there's something real or true in it, and we that's our Mitzrayim. That's our shibud. And what we're trying to do in break free of in Shovavim, שמות וארא בא בשלח יתרו משפטים תרומה תצוה, so we're still in it, Terumah. Two more weeks of it. In this period of Shovavim we're getting out of our Mitzrayim. We're looking for genuine real authentic connections, and we're not going to be satisfied with the counterfeit ones. We're not going to live any longer with layers and covers concealing the light that is our neshama and that is Hashem expressing himself in us and through us and to us in this world and now we are working on shmiras habris. We are going back to that promise of that covenant, the promise that we have to him and to ourselves, the promise of being our best selves and on our best behavior. והנה השם יתברך הכה במצרים להורות בזה את אמיתת שליטות השם יתברך בבריאה ביטול מציאות הטבע. So why did Hashem do the makkos? Ten plagues in Egypt, ten plagues and a splitting of a sea, you know why? You know what the best way to defeat the illusion is to knock it down. So this piece of paper the thing looks real because it's an optical illusion. If you tear it up now in pieces what happened to your optical illusion? I guess it wasn't real. Hashem's makkos were tearing up the optical illusion. There's an optical illusion called Mitzrayim. It has a Nile, you think the Nile is irrigating and sustaining and feeding you. It's a place of idolatry. You think this is all real this whole matrix this whole illusion this hedonistic corrupt moral depraved pleasure, you think it's all real? That's the makkos. דם צפרדע כנים ערוב one by one Hashem is ripping it up, tearing it into further pieces, ten different little pieces. And he was destroying it in order to say I'm not going to do this again, I'm not going to do this often, but every once in a while I want you to see that this thing called nature, science, chemistry, biology, physics, all which we endorse and believe in and study, the Rambam writes that's how we learn about Hashem through nature. But the nature is not an entity on its own. There is no there's nature and there's God. The Ramban says there's no such thing as nature. It's Hashem expressing revealing himself, so when you learn biology and chemistry and physics, what are you learning about? Hashem. You're not learning about nature. You're not learning about nature. You're learning about Hashem. So להורות ולהוכיח שהטבע אינו כח אמיתי he tears it up, על ידי זה לגרום לנו להסתכל על פנימיות he's forcing us to look at the pnimiyos, at the authentic, at the genuine of what's real, what's inside, what you can't see with your eyes but is even more true than the optical illusion. וברגע שהתגלה המציאות האמיתית של השם יתברך ממילא נתבטלה הקליפה and that's how we destroy the klipa. כמו שהחושך נעלם על ידי התגלות האור שלא צריך לסלקו אלא אין לו כלל מציאות. You how do you get rid of dark? You walk into a dark room. How do you get rid of the darkness? Turn on do you get rid of dark? You didn't do anything to the dark. But when you turn on a light, mimaila automatically there is no dark. You didn't get rid of dark, you didn't destroy dark, you didn't put the dark back in the bottle, back in the canister, you didn't eliminate the dark or collect the dark and put it in the garbage. How do you get rid of dark? Not actually by getting rid of dark. You don't get rid of dark. But when there's light, there's no dark. How do you get rid of klipa? How do you get rid of the illusion, the matrix, the counterfeit? By experiencing the real. When you let in the light of Hashem, when you experience the authentic and the real of Hashem, so mimaila there is no dark, there is no klipa. When you're living a life of connection, life of love, a life of surrender, a life of faith, a life of equanimity, so mimaila there is no narishkeit, silliness, panic, fear, it disappears just like the light the dark disappears because there's light, the klipa disappears because there's kedusha, because there's truth. ונכנע קליפת מצרים הודו על האמת וראו כי השם הוא האלוהים. And what was the conclusion and the result of the curriculum called the makkos? Now the Mitzrim look up and they say Hashem hu Ha'elokim. We thought there was something called nature, we thought there was something called a Nile, but it turns out all there really is is Hashem hu Ha'elokim. ואז יצא ישראל מתחתם להיות לעם סגולה to become the people, the treasured people we are, לגלות הדת הקדושה בכל העולם, l'galos l'farseim l'va'er in order to reveal and to publicize and to clarify שהעולם החיצוני אינו כלום. This superficial material illusion world, it's not real. It's it's a modern optical illusion. And we'll know that when our soul is extracted from our body and we go live eternity with him and we leave all that illusion behind. illusion has a role. It gives us free will. It lets us express choice. It has meaning and purpose. It becomes the instrument through which we can express ourselves and make choices our free will. But in and in of itself שעולם החיצוני אינו כלום אלא יש כאן פנימיות אלוקית שהיא עיקר הכל. I mean the closest we can get we can feel is as Rabbi Nachman writes like clothing. Would you ever confuse your clothing with yourself? Would you treat your clothing your clothing is not your body, it's not you, it's your clothing. Does that mean clothing is worthless? No, clothing has a purpose. Keeps you modest, keeps you dressed, protects you from the elements. It reflects an appearance and values. Clothing has a very important purpose. But clothing in the end of the day is clothing. It's dispensable. You can get rid of it. You should get rid of it. It's not something that we worship or elevate or invest too much in and certainly are never defined by because it's just clothing. So this whole world is the levush. The whole world, the physical world is the clothing, the wardrobe of the light of the reality which is Hashem. And it has a purpose and it has meaning and we use it. It has utility and function. But just like we would never confuse our clothing with ourselves, we know that we're not taking our clothing with us. We shouldn't want to give up our kidney to have an extra piece of clothing. We'd never confuse our clothing with ourselves. This world is the levush, the garment of the light that is the truth that is Hashem. And we the makkos, Hashem did the makkos for us to see. And now we need to liberate ourselves from it. Last paragraph. V'shekoreim parshiyos eileh, so while we're reading and living מתעורר העניין בכל שנה מחודש, we are reinvigorating and re-awakening and re-energizing these ideas always anew. וכל אחד מאיתנו מקבל כוח עצום and davka in this time, it's a very auspicious time. The energy of this time is such that we can draw the strength לזכות גם ולהכות בקליפות. We can give our own makkos to the teva in our life. We bring the ten plagues. I don't mean literally the ten plagues, but it means like God struck Mitzrayim, we can strike down the illusion, the confusion of the matrix in our lives ולצאת מהמיצר הפרטי שלו. And to liberate ourselves and free ourselves and unshackle ourselves. This is the time of year that delete social media from your phone, cut down your screen time, cut down your Starbucks visits, cut down whatever in your life that you're doing compulsively that is incompatible with who you want to be, this is when we can liberate ourselves from that Mitzrayim. We have that energy. This is the time that carries that, it's auspicious for it. ולקבל מדרגה חדשה ופנימית יותר בתורה הקדושה שהחיבור שלנו עם הבורא יתברך to defeat the Amalek, the koach hachillul, defeat the voice of randomness and chance and happenstance and lean into and turn up the volume on the koach hahillul. That Hashem is amazing and everything is awesome and I'm going to live a life of equanimity. I'm not panicked and I'm not anxious and I'm not filled with drama and highs and lows. I'm just yeah, yeah, whatever it is we're going to get through it. Whatever it is we're going to experience it. Whatever it is it's all from above and whatever it is therefore it's all by design. This is the time that we have that power im yirtzeh Hashem to free ourselves, to free ourselves from that place called Mitzrayim. To overcome it, to realize there's something so much bigger. There's something that's happening that's so much more real. There's something that's going on. There's something so much more there's a pnimius, there's an essence. There's something that's going on that we need to access. And when we do, oh we'll be living on a whole other level. We'll be living a whole other level and that whole other level you'll be living a whole other life. It's the best life. The Amalek people are miserable. Look around this world. I'm the luckiest person because I'm teaching something that is not only true, it to me it's now so obvious and it's so enriching and it's so empowering. And I'm trying so hard to live it myself. But you look around at a world that think that the physical, the material, the superficial, the surface, that's what's real. And the more they have of it, the more unhappy they are. I wish it'd be interesting to try to correlate the Forbes 400 with their medicine cabinet. I'd be really curious to correlate it. Who would do that study? The more money you have, do you have more happiness? Do you have more inner peace and tranquility? Do you have better relationships? Or perhaps is it the opposite? It doesn't have to be the opposite. You could have a lot of money and have all of that if you understand the role and the place of money. But if all along you thought that money or fame or friends or followers or influence would bring you happiness and then you have it all and you're still not happy, then your medicine cabinet becomes full. Hopefully of prescribed medications, sadly often of non-prescribed. But if you realize what really brings fulfillment and meaning and peace and tranquility and serenity and happiness, then you also still want money. Don't get me wrong. But you understand its role and its place and its purpose, and you'll never confuse it with it being the thing that's going to give you happiness. So, it's not just that we're sharing something which is true, you just I want to scream it from the rooftop. You want the whole world to have it and to live it because it's another life altogether. It's another life altogether to live it and feel it that whatever comes our way, we live it with this equanimity, we could live it with this tranquility, we can be happy and sing and dance and we'll be sad and we'll cry when something hurts and feel pain, but behind it driving it all is the sense that we're free from Mitzrayim. We don't live that surface superficial life. We don't feel that things are caving in. We're not confusing that nature has its own entity, existence, or power. We're living in this connection im yirtzeh Hashem we should live it, we should merit to live it, we should see Hashem everywhere and we should see the Yad Hashem bring besoros tovos for Am Yisrael. Amen.
