Transcript
Good morning, Boker Tov, welcome back to Living with Emunah. So happy that you are all here, those in person, those watching, listening live or later online. Our Emunah Shiur... our Emunah series is generously sponsored by Dr. Zavi and Bella Morgan. We remain grateful to the Morgans each and every week, sponsoring in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Gabbit and in memory of Bella’s mother Dr. Ellen Chance. This morning's Shiur is also sponsored by Laura Margolis in memory of her father David Jacobs, דוד בן שמואל נפתלי on his Yahrtzeit, Neshama shetihyeh l'aliyah. By Pam and Prosper Abitbol in memory of the Yahrtzeit of her father Lester Agremer, Eliezer ben Meir, the 12th of Iyar, Neshama shetihyeh l'aliyah. And by Meryl and Jeremy Strauss in memory of Michael Strauss, whose fifth Yahrtzeit was on Sunday. Thank you to all of our generous sponsors and our learning should elevate all of their Neshamot. How's everyone's Emunah? Having a good week? Okay, that's good. So I will share with you a couple Emunah emails I got. Keep the Emunah emails coming, they take what we're learning and bring it from theory, academic and abstract, and listening to others putting it into practice helps us put it into practice as well. Helps us put it into practice as well. I have a new lease, I have a new car, somebody rear-ended it and damaged it pretty badly. But you don't get bent out of shape because if you go or give the Emunah Shiur, then you just remember that's the way it's meant to be. Okay, so they hit the car and ran away and aren't accountable. It's a car, it's a thing, it's not a person, what's the big deal? Not a big deal. So how do you maintain your calm? How do you not yell at yourself or someone else who was involved? How do you... because if you have Emunah and Bitachon, you realize it's all from Hashem. This is all from above, it's all what's meant to be. You hold the person accountable, you try to figure out who it was, try to get their insurance information, but in the end of the day, Emunah changes your life. Instead of raging or instead of getting angry or instead of being disappointed or instead of being upset or bitter or resentful, instead of your blood pressure going up, instead of wishing it was done differently, you just say, that's the way it is. That's the way it's meant to be. This is the way it was meant to happen and now you can take on whatever comes your way in your day. It's such a great way to start the day. It's such a great way to wake up. It's a little something called davening. We daven every morning Shacharis and the result of Shacharis should be, when you finish Shacharis, you have refortified your Emunah in Hashem, you've just finished this conversation with Hashem that takes 20 or 30 or 40 or 50 minutes depending what Minyan you go to, if you daven home alone, whatever amount of time, if you're a busy mother getting kids off to school, maybe you have two minutes or five minutes, whatever amount of time you're able to legitimately lean in and dedicate, but the result of that time in conversation with Hashem should be, I'm starting my day with a check-in. Oh, I remember you're here, right? In a healthy marriage, even when one partner wakes up and gets out of the house earlier than the other, you don't not talk until the first time in the day that you needed to know something. 11:00 AM, 1:00 PM, 3:00 PM, what's for dinner? Are you home for dinner? Oh, you're alive, I didn't know you existed. At some point there should be good morning. You have to start the day like we exist, we love each other, we're checking in, how was your night? Good morning, what's on tap today? Have a great day. And basically what that does is it sets the stage that throughout your day, the other person who is your other half is in the background of your life the whole day. But when you neglect them and don't talk to them and don't check in with them and don't hear what's going to be their day, and you only first connect later in the day when you need something, then the nature of the relationship is just quid pro quo, it's needing something, it's functional, pragmatic, rather than being something which is romantic and loving and completing you. And what's true physically, you don't know this, but I sneak in Shalom Bayis class in the Emunah Shiur. Try sneaking in a shtickel Shalom Bayis. So, but the same is true in our relationship with Hashem. We wake up in the morning from the first words on our lips which are Modeh Ani or Modah Ani if you're a woman. From the first words on our lips we wake up in the morning: Good morning, Hashem. Little check-in. Oh, I'm alive, I open my eyes, I can see, I put my feet on the ground, there's a heart beating in, I'm alive. Modeh Ani. Wow, thankful am I, Rabbah emunasecha, your faith in me is great. I love you, Hashem, I feel your love for me. Here's what's on tap today, I hope you'll be with me. I look forward to it, let's see what you got planned for us today. That's how you start the day. What a great check-in. Not the first time in the day that you need something. Cup of coffee, so you say a Shehakol, to caffeinate with Kavana. I loved last night we had the former head of the Mossad, Yossi Cohen, at our Shul. Anyone who was there, if you're one of the 500 people there, was an incredible evening. So his chief of staff, who also was a high-ranking member of the Mossad, and he were sitting in my office beforehand and they wanted a cup of coffee. And I saw her, she just kept looking at the cup. She was just checking out the cup over and over again. So I said, you like that cup? She loved caffeinate with Kavana. She was drinking out of a caffeinate with Kavana cup. They don't sell those in Israel. I said, take some back to Mossad headquarters. As long as you don't bug my office, we're good to go. Anyway, so, caffeinate with Kavana. So if the first time that you talk to Hashem is the first time in the day that you need him. Because in marriage you you kind of have that. First time you hear from someone is when they say, can you order this on Amazon, can you pay this bill. Oh, you're alive! I didn't even hear from you today until now. I didn't realize you were alive. How about good morning, how was your day, how was your night, have a great day. And now could you pay the bill, could you order that, what's for dinner? So Hashem's like don't don't the first time you talk to me during the day is the first time you need something. How about good morning, thank you that I'm alive, that I woke up, how was your night, Hashem? You were busy because you cover all time zones you didn't even get to sleep. Let me tell you about my night. So that's the way we start our day. It's a little something called davening we start with emuna and when you start your day with emuna when I when we start our days with emuna so now Hashem this is an adventure let's see what you have planned today. Oh someone was going to rear-end me and drive off and I didn't know and I'd get insurance and the car and a rent. Oh so fun I didn't know that was what was on tap today. So exciting so exciting such an adventure so wonderful you never know what adventure's on tap today. Couple quick emails and then we dive back into Tiv Ha'Emuna Rav Gamliel. First email hot off the press. Dear Rabbi Goldberg one of the favorite aspects of your emuna series for me is to acknowledge and allow the struggles with emuna. You've said on numerous occasions the struggling with Hashem is allowed. It's even a form of emuna. I'm sharing this story with you and feel free to share with the audience if you think it would be appropriate. It's a message that we share often. There's no mitzvah to get angry at God there's no mitzvah to be frustrated with God or have doubt with Hashem but there is a license there is permission. Avraham Avinu battled with Hashem over Sedom. Moshe Rabbeinu says show me your face I want to understand your ways. We have a history of great people and the evidence you believe in God is you don't battle or struggle and you're not disappointed in someone or something that you don't think exists. You're not upset or disappointed or frustrated you don't object to a figment of your imagination to a character that doesn't really exist. The evidence you really believe in Hashem and that you expect so much from Him and that you feel He's your Father in heaven is when you treat Him and relate to Him as you would your own father. Now you can't use it as a cop-out and excuse to run away it has to be something that propels you leaning into that relationship. So the author of the email continues: I'm currently going through a horrible situation that is parnassa-related and I was feeling guilty for being angry at Hashem. After speaking with a friend and thinking about your message I realized that the struggle and anger I feel is indeed a hashgacha pratis story too. When I realized that I actually felt a bit lighter. I've been learning Rav Soloveitchik's book Worship of the Heart and I recently came across this passage that underscores the idea. And she quotes the section: Quote, Avoda shebalev is realized in the misery of humiliation when the soul cries out: My God, my God, why hast Thou forsaken me? In the bliss of beholding His glory when man sings out raise oh gates your head; in the suffering of the human being when he wears himself out in trying to appease a desire that is renewed with every gratification; in his frustrating undertaking to lead meaning and sense to life; in his despair over the emptiness and absurdity of existence he recognizes as the vanity of all things. To me this passage and your teaching has actually unburdened me from the guilt I was feeling for being so angry and mad. I realize the anger I feel and the sense of feeling this is so absurd is a form of connecting with Hashem. In other words I'm feeling that my current test is a way for me to see Hashem's hand in an incredibly frustrating way. It's also a form of hashgacha pratis. Just being able to articulate somehow makes the nisayon a little bit lighter. Thank you for reading please don't read my name. That is the email. In other words this author is going through a hard time with parnassa and as each disappointment or failure or struggle she says Hashem this is absurd genuk shoyn enough it's ridiculous where are you? So I'm annoyed at you and I can't believe you're putting me through this and why is nothing working out and why am I so frustrated and what's going to be and how will I pay my bills but each time I react that way and I direct it to you I'm both frustrated with you but drawing close to you by directing it at you. If you don't believe in God you just say the universe is mistreating me. What a coincidence what a random string of things that I can't find this job the parnassa's working out. But when you channel and direct the frustration at Hashem like genuk shoyn enough this is ridiculous let something come through I need to pay my bills where are you what's going on over here? You're actually drawing close to that person you're drawing close to that being in this case to the Ribbono Shel Olam himself. One more from a member of our emuna shiur. My husband and I were going to Dallas Texas for our grandson's shabbos sheva brachos. We were flying from Fort Lauderdale airport. We left our house at 1:30 PM for a 3:45 flight. The flight was scheduled to leave on time we boarded the plane. 15 minutes prior to takeoff we were informed the flight had not been cleared for takeoff as there were severe thunderstorms in and around Dallas. We were told we needed to deboard the plane take all personal belongings with us. We overheard a conversation about a two-hour delay. We settled in the boarding area we waited over four hours to again board the plane. We finally took off and landed at Dallas airport around 10 PM 11 Eastern Time. As we approached the baggage area I realized I had left my backpack on the floor in front of. Of my seat. I was upset because two valuable pieces of jewelry were in the backpack. While my husband went to retrieve our luggage, I searched for someone to assist me in getting my bag off the plane. Omitted from the email is the husband's reaction when he realized she left the backpack on the plane. I know the husband, I'm sure he was calm, cool, collected and said, it's all from Hashem. Finally, I found two policemen who told me I had to go to the check-in counter. When I got there, I pleaded for help. The gentleman at the counter listened to my story and asked me for the gate where we landed. After giving him the wrong gate number, finding out the plane was not there anymore, I called my husband who was able to identify the gate. I pleaded with the individual to please try again as it was important I get the bag that night. He disappeared for a while and said he was going to get the bag. When he returned, I was grateful to him with a nice tip and a big thank you. We proceeded to go to the shuttle to the rental car office. While waiting for the shuttle, two completely full shuttles passed us by without stopping. A few minutes later, two of our married couples that had flown from New York appeared and told us the rental car agency closed at ten, they couldn't get their car. They came with us and we got an SUV for six passengers. Had I not left my backpack on the much-delayed plane, we would not have been there to assist our grandchildren. Hashem had a whole plan for us. When we returned to the Dallas airport, went to the check-out counter, the same gentleman who helped me in retrieving the backpack was working there. Of course, we thanked him again. My husband asked for his name so we could praise him to the airline. His badge, his name was Angel. He truly was my angel that night, but we know that Hashem orchestrated the whole scenario. Every time you fly, you're almost guaranteed an Emuna Shiur story. So, when I run out of stories, I just book a flight. I have something for the next Emuna Shiur, which reminds me, next week I have a wedding Baruch Hashem, Simchas Lag Ba'Omer, a wedding in New York, so we're doing the Emuna Shiur on Monday, not Wednesday. Next week, the Emuna Shiur is Monday, not Wednesday, same time, 8:45 AM. We will post it in the Emuna WhatsApp group. If you're not in the Emuna WhatsApp group, you're missing bonus material, update on the schedule, and the link and more. Tuv HaEmuna page Ayin Tes, let's dive back inside. Enough of that shenanigans. Let's get back into the Torah. Rav Gamliel Rabinovich, I think I shared last week in the WhatsApp group a great Mishpacha article about him, a picture of him, his hadras panim, his countenance, great stories of him. It's wonderful to know whose Torah you're learning. Through Torah, you're connecting to a person. You're connecting to a person. Yesterday, Rabbi Leo Dee and his daughters and son had a meeting with the recipients of his wife's organs. Again, they asked a shayla and they followed the opinion you can donate organs, a perfect legitimate halachic opinion. His wife, who was murdered by a terrorist yimach shemo, Hashem yikom dama, her organs were donated. And if you see this video, it's posted online, you'll see one of the daughters listening to in the patient who received her mother's heart, she's listening to her mother's heart continue to beat. Unbelievable. Her mother was killed, but her heart is continuing to beat in this other person and she's listening to the heartbeat of her mother that continues in this other person. But several people sent me the link of this online, this press conference, a meeting with these people, because Rabbi Dee when he was talking and he was saying, we have the power to be in and connect and support and be the heartbeat of one another. Talking about Am Yisrael, Klal Yisrael, we beat with one heart, we're one people. And he said, you know, there are these two rabbis, I've been learning their Torah for ten years, we had never met, but they flew here to pay a shiva call, can you believe it? Because our neshamas were really connecting over ten years even though we never met. And similarly, our hearts are connected and they're beating together and we're donating organs and Torah and souls to one another all along. It was amazing. Again, it continues to amaze me. It's really, really special and amazing. So, why do I say that? Because we're learning Rav Gamliel, Tuv HaEmuna. So our heart is beating with his, our neshama's connecting with his. He never heard of Ephraim Goldberg, he has no idea, I can promise you he can't find Boca Raton on a map. I can promise you. Mekubal in Yerushalayim. He doesn't know us, but he does know us. Our neshamas are all singing and dancing and learning together every time we open his sefer Tuv HaEmuna. It's worthwhile knowing him, read the article I posted it last week in the group. ראינו אצל דוד המלך. We're at the bottom of page Ayin Tes, 79. ראינו אצל דוד המלך alav hashalom שצוה את שלמה בנו לפני מותו. David HaMelech commanded his son, Solomon, the wisest of all men, before David HaMelech died, he said, דע את אלהי אביך ועבדהו. A pasuk in Divrei HaYamim Aleph. He said, know your God, your father, and serve Him. What a message. Why didn't he just say, avdehu, serve God? Shlomola, David for sure called him Shlomola. Shlomola. Turn it over to top of page Pe, 80. Shlomola. Shlomo HaMelech. He didn't call him HaMelech, that wasn't the name he gave him at his bris. He called him Shlomo, we call him Shlomo HaMelech. Shlomola, avdehu, there's a God, He created you, serve Him. But that's not what David HaMelech said before he died. Shlomo was a grown man, heir to the throne. He didn't say, serve God. What did he say? Know God and serve Him. Da, know Him. Know Him. Why did he preface serve Him with know Him? ועיניין בזה שלפני שעובדים את השם צריכים להכירו. Because how can you serve Hashem if you don't know Him? How can you figure out what He wants from you in life? How do you know your role in this world? How do you know what your mission is and why you're here? How do you lean on Him? How do you thank Him? How do you pray to Him? How do you talk to Him? How do you surrender to Him? How do you live a life with Him if you don't know Him? You have to get to know Him. שלפני שעובדים את השם צריך להכיר דבלאו הכי לא יודעים כלל למי עובדים. Who are we serving? Who is God? What are His priorities? What are His values? How does He run His world? Who is He? Who is He? What makes Him tick? What matters to Him? If you don't know God, how can you serve Him? ולפי גודל הידיעה כך הוא גודל העבודה. And the more you know Him, the more you want to serve Him. The more you find meaning and satisfaction and purpose in knowing you give Him nachas ruach, that you give Him nachas. Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan zatzal writes in one of his books that the human psyche works the way Hashem designed us. We get incredible joy. One of the greatest pleasures that we have is knowing we gave nachas, knowing that we gave pride to someone we respect. When you're young and your parents tell you, "I'm proud of you," that's unbelievable. Better than a gift, better than Amazon gift card, better than a paid vacation, better than simply knowing you gave nachas. When someone that you take pride, when somebody you admire, someone in a position of power, those don't always go to the same, somebody you look up to for their knowledge, their wisdom, their accomplishments, and they tell you, maybe it's a rebbe of yours, maybe it's an extraordinary woman, maybe it's a person in the field that you're part of who's amazingly accomplished at the top of that same field, maybe it's a person who's in a position of power who asked you, assigned you to fulfill a mission, and they say, "I'm really proud of you. I'm really grateful to you. You did a great job. Thank you." That feeling we get is among the greatest pleasure man is capable of knowing. That's part of the human psyche. It's one of the love languages in all the studies and research in companies and in families. How do you motivate and how do you drive people? Some, it's physical gifts, but others, words of affirmation, it's pride. The power of that should not and cannot be underestimated. Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan writes that in the book for us to understand that if we know the joy it gives us when our parents say, "I'm proud of you," if you know the joy it gives you when your boss says, "job well done," if you know the joy it gives you when the king, when the president, when the prime minister says, "thank you for fulfilling that mission," now imagine when Hashem looks down at you and He says, "You give me tremendous nachas." He pinches the cheek for sure and He says, "Wow, the nachas you give me. The nachas you give me. Mein kinder, my child, the nachas you give me knows no bounds. You have no idea." That pleasure, psh, it's unbelievable. We need to know that we give Hashem nachas. We need to know it. This is not some neo-Chassidic, newfangled, new age idea, you give Hashem nachas. The Ramchal writes it at the end of Mesillas Yesharim. It appears in many early sources, the notion, the language of nachas. It goes back to the Torah. Reach nichoach when you offer a korban and it produces a pleasant fragrant aroma, it's giving Hashem nachas ruach. Hashem gets nachas. He gets nachas. He needs us to do what we do. Been debating my shtiebel chevre for a while, I'm coming around. He needs us. He created us because there is a need for us to fulfill. He doesn't need us to imply He's not infinite, omnipotent, and perfect, but He chooses to create a world where He chooses to need us. But the reality is once He's made that choice, He needs us. And when we fulfill that need He's created for us, He gets tremendous nachas from us. So how can we know what that need is? How do you know how Hashem needs you? Why are you here? Why'd you wake up this morning? Why are you here? Why are you alive? Why were you created in the first place? There are billions of people on this globe. We need you? What do you offer? What do you do? What legacy do you leave? What difference do you make? With all the billions of people on this planet called Earth, what do you add? Why are you here? Now I don't say that to make you conclude, takeh, nothing I guess, but the opposite. If with all the billions of people He chose to create you and me, if we're here, if we woke up this morning, it's because He needs us. It's because there's something for us to do, a mission for us to fulfill, nachas He's waiting to feel and give us. What is it? How can you know if you don't know Him? If you don't study Him? If you don't court him, if you don't talk to him, if you don't listen to him talking to you? Hashem is talking to us all the time. Tonight on Behind the Bima, we're interviewing Rabbi Kalman Samuels, the founder of Shalva. Anyone know of Shalva in Yerushalayim? Shalva's an extraordinary place. Rabbi Samuels and his very special wife Malki had a son who due to a vaccine injury, which is not a comment on vaccines, this is something everybody knows in medicine is a small risk, he ultimately went blind and deaf by three years old and couldn't communicate and when Hashem answered their tefillah to help him become the Helen Keller of Israel and learn to sign and communicate, they said we'll give back to Hashem, they started to create a center for children that grew into Shalva today, a thousand from children to adults and if you've never been to the Shalva center it's absolutely extraordinary. It's an amazing story, he's an amazing person and he's going to talk about it, we're going to interview tonight on Behind the Bima, on Behind the Bima. How do you know what your mission, what your purpose, what you're meant to do if you don't listen to Hashem? He's going to talk about, he grew up in Vancouver, he wasn't religious at all. How did he become religious? End up making aliyah, end up founding Shalva and so on. Listen, tune in, it's worth hearing his story, but in his story are several times that Hashem was talking to him through a professor at college, through a rabbi he ran into on his way to India. Hashem kept sending messages. He's broadcasting all the time. Is your antenna extended? Is your device on? Are you picking up the signal? He's talking to us all the time. Da, said Dovid HaMelech to Shlomo, know God, talk to him, listen to him talking to you, study his Torah, read his diary, understand his world, biology, chemistry, physics, understand history. I have a daughter taking an AP tomorrow? All we've heard about for the last two weeks is her talking to herself walking around the house about American history. But it's great because we're talking about history and how it unfolds and Hashem's the messages, the signals, how Hashem reveals himself in history. He's talking to us all the time, are we listening? Do we come to know him? To know him is to love him. Do we come to listen to him? What's his mission for us? What are we meant to do? How does he need us? Why does he choose to need us in that way that he's waiting for us? And the more that we know him, the more we listen to him, the closer we are to him, the greater our avodah, our mission. בצריך האדם להשגיח בזה הרבה כח ויגיעות. That's not easy. Says Rav Gamliel. How do you fit that in between carpool and making dinner? How do you fit that in between going to work and going to the gym? How do you fit that in between all the things that we have to do? Who has time to know God? We barely have time to talk to each other, to spend time with our family and our loved ones. Who has time for friends? Who has time for anything? Hobbies? Is there time for God? That takes a lot of time, koach v'yegios. It takes effort, it takes initiative, it takes mindfulness, presence. וכמו שאדם עושה בכחו לדעת הש"ס הפוסקים ושלחן ערוך וכל הדברים כך באמונה כדי לדעת ולהכיר את הבורא נדרשת הרבה עבודה. Now we know that if you are committed to learning Torah, it takes work. Sometimes we mistakenly think that the young men sitting in a beis medrash, oh they have it easy. What do they do? They sit all day on a chair with a book open in front of them. Oh, what a luxury, what a life. I wish I could sign up for that. Have you tried it? Have you tried it? It is a gift and it is a privilege, they don't and shouldn't take it for granted, and if you can help them that is a privilege and bracha too, but try it. You try sitting. You try sitting for 10 or 12 or 14 hours a day with your mind focused, reading, analyzing, debating, comprehending, memorizing, processing. You try it. Try for an hour. Try for half an hour. I get complaints my drashas are too long. Try for 20 minutes. Not easy. It takes effort. If you have a mission to understand Tanach, to finish Tanach, some of you have finished the OU's incredible program of finishing Tanach. Tanach, Mishnah, Shas, Shulchan Aruch, Halacha, Smichas Chaver, whatever program you're part of you know it takes work, it takes commitment, it takes consistency. It's not easy, it's hard, it's hard, and you go in knowing it's going to be hard. If you decide you're running for whatever organization in some half marathon, you mark your calendar with that date, now you gotta start training. You don't think it's going to be easy. Nobody's pushing you in a stroller around the circle. It's hard. How many miles? What pace? Your endurance? What are you going to add? When are you going for the longer runs? Whatever's worth it in life you know is not going to be easy, it's hard. You gotta set out with a resolution, with a plan, with a plan. And you know what else is hard? Emunah. It doesn't happen sitting on your recliner. I don't care where you're listening to the Emuna shiur, mine or the million and one others. Where you're reading the Emuna book? Mine, that doesn't exist yet, or the million and one others. I was gonna say it doesn't matter if you're reading it on the couch, in a recliner, in your comfortable, in your backyard, you're sipping a piña colada, you're by your pool. It does, that's the easy part, listening passively. Now go out and live it! Now go work on it! Now go apply it! When someone rear-ends your car and drives off, to say, "Oh, it's from Hashem, what's the adventure today?" It's hard work! Being misgaber, overcoming your instinct and working on yourself and conquering yourself to react the way you're meant to react, to remain composed the way you're meant to remain composed, to process what's happening in your life the way you're meant to process it. That's, that's hard work. That's not easy. That's not easier than finishing Shas or Shulchan Aruch or Tanach. ואף על פי שכל אחד אומר שיודע ומכירו, so you say, "What's the hard work? I know there's Hashem. Since I'm a little kid I've been saying Modeh Ani. Since I'm a little kid I've been singing Hashem is here, Hashem is there, Hashem is everywhere. What's the hard work? ברוך אתה ה' אלהינו מלך העולם שהכל נהיה בדברו. Amen. Amen. Thank you. It's hard work! So you say, 'What's the hard work? I know Hashem. I keep Shabbos and I keep Yom Tov and I daven three times a day and I keep Torah and Mitzvos. I listen to the shofar and I shake the lulav and I sit in the sukkah and I light the Chanukah candles. What are you talking about hard work? I put on the tzitzis and I wear my tefillin. What do you say hard work? I know there's Hashem, I talk about him, I make brachos, I daven all the time.' Yeah, that's the easy part. That's the easy part. עליו לבדוק בעצמו כמה באמת הוא מקיים שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד. Yeah, when you're in shul and you're in the beis medrash, when you're standing opposite the Shabbos candles or the Chanukah candles, then it's easy to know and to talk about Hashem. How about the שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד when you're behind your wheel of your car? שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד when you're behind the stroller in the supermarket? שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד when you walk out of yet another job interview and you didn't get the job? How about the שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד when the police is taking the report about the car being rear-ended? How about שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד when you left your backpack on the plane and you don't know if you're gonna get the jewelry back and if Hashem is sending you an angel to go find it? It's great when you can send the email afterwards and the story all has this great ending and you even were able to drive the children in the SUV. It's a great story and I'm so happy for the email and to share it with you. But when you live it, how about the Shivisi Hashem you need then? ולא מסיח דעתו מזה כלל from when you wake up in the morning until you go to sleep and even in between, that Hashem is always on your mind. He's always by your side. He's always informing and inspiring everything that you see, hear, feel, do, say, that he's always there. I've given this example before. It's like parenting. I'd say it's like mothering. In this way I admire my wife much more, I'm not nearly as good at it and I think it's much more of a maternal instinct, although I'm sure there are great dads too, I don't mean to disparage all dads. There's not a moment in a mother's life that she's not thinking about her children. You could be on vacation you're like, "Enough, can we just be together alone, away?" No. Don't ask a mother to ever pretend that she doesn't think about where her children are, what they're doing, their happiness, their success, what they're going through. Dads, us too, we can't stop it. Blah, blah, blah. Yeah, right. Even while we're playing golf, we're thinking about the children. But that's, that's part of I think what I admire, what we look up to, what we count on about mothers. Shivisi the children l'negdam samid. The children are opposite the mother always. At dinner, "Should we check on the babysitter? Should we check on the kids? Have we checked in with the kids? The kids are forty years old, I think they're okay." Right? The kids have grandchildren, I don't think we have to check in on them. I think they're okay. But the mother's like, "No," she's 122 years old and she's still worrying about the kids because that's a mother. So, and that's natural. That's natural. So that's what Tehillim, Dovid Hamelech was saying we're supposed to be feeling for Hashem. שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד. Hashem, like are you okay? We're checking in, you're by my side, we're good, what's this adventure? Thank you for all you do. Please, I need your help. I can't believe this is happening. Whatever the nature of the exchange, but he's always there, he's always opposite us, he's always on our mind. He's always on our mind. Ki atah immadi. You're always with me. You're always with me. גם כי אלך בגיא צלמות. Could be walking through a personal hell. It could be in parnassah, it could be a moment of panic about a backpack, it could be a car getting rear-ended, it could be something more significant or less. But Hashem, ki atah immadi, you're always with me. Ein od milvado, there is no one and nothing but you. As much as I know that I exist, I know you exist, you're by my side. שויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד is to the point of... Is there ever a moment that you're alive that you forget you exist? You are aware of yourself throughout the day, you're in conversation with yourself throughout the day, you are assessing your surroundings and how you feel and what you're going to do and how you're experiencing everything all day. There's never a moment that you're like, oh, I forgot I exist. You exist, and your existence automatically creates an awareness of existence all the time. And Hashem, we are just an expression, an extension of Hashem, our existence is evidence for His existence, and it's opposite us and with us always ולא מסיח דעתו מזה כלל. It's never interrupted, it's never disturbed, it's never severed *afilu lo rega*, not for a moment כמו שכתב רבינו הבעל שם טוב, הייליגער בעל שם טוב, אשרי אדם לא יחשוב ה' לו עון שמאד שבח לאדם כשעושה חשבון נפשו ורואה שהעון שלו הוא נחשב כשלא חושב מה'. You know where our mistakes all come from? Look back and evaluate your day, and every time that you said the things you shouldn't have said, reacted in the way you shouldn't have reacted, made the decisions you shouldn't have made, behaved in the way you shouldn't have behaved, made choices you shouldn't have made, it's always because in that moment you forgot Him. You choose, you chose to forget Him. It's always because in that moment נכנס בו רוח שטות. For that moment you became mindless, for that moment you were overwhelmed by a spirit of silliness, of foolishness, of vanity ומובא גם כן מהבעל שם טוב, הייליגער בעל שם טוב, also in *Betzava'at ha'Rivash*, וסרתם ועבדתם אלוהים אחרים. We say in *Shema*, *vesartem*, you'll pivot, you'll steer, you'll redirect, and you'll serve other gods שאם יקרה וסרתם שתסיחו הדעת רגע אחד מלפני המקום נחשב לכם כמו ועבדתם אלוהים אחרים. You know how the *Baal Shem Tov* understood it? *Vesartem*. The very act of *vesartem*. If you're distracted, if you turn away, if you forget He's there, if you're living a life absent God, if you're not interpreting everything that's happening to you and for you and with you, if you're not interpreting it as from Hashem, *vesartem*. There's a *hessech hadaat*, there's an interruption, there's a breach, there's a barrier, there's a forgetfulness that there's Hashem, it is as if you've served another god. It's as if you've served another god. It's as if you've served another god. A man on a business trip who forgets that he's married for a moment, even if he's unfaithful, the fact that for a moment he forgot he was married is an act of unfaithfulness. Even if he didn't act unfaithfully, the very fact for a moment he contemplated, I'm in a business trip, at a hotel, at the bar, in a business meeting, meeting someone, I forgot for a moment I'm married, that forgetting you're bound and married is an act of unfaithfulness even if it didn't proceed to an actual act of unfaithfulness. And suddenly, *vesartem*. The very act of *vesartem* to turn away, to forget, to neglect, to not interpret our life as everything from Hashem, is an expression of unfaithfulness. It is *va'avadtem elohim acherim*. It is serving another god ואכן עבודה קשה היא עד מאד. So it's really difficult. It's so hard. I know we make it sound easy. Every Wednesday morning we get together, and it's so easy just live with *emunah*, have a great week, I'll read you some emails, have some coffee, we'll do it all again. It sounds so easy, just live with *emunah*. *Emunah*, *bitachon*, check, I'm good, I got it, I davened, I did my *mitzvos*, I'm good. But it's so hard. *Avoda kasha*. That's like get married, be in love, have a happy marriage, treat the other person respectfully, yeah, it's easy, it's easy, right? It's hard, it's hard work. It's the way it's meant to be because it's most rewarding. The things that are hardest are most rewarding. It takes work, it takes work, it takes presence, it takes mindfulness, it takes regulating ourselves קשה היא עד מאד לקיים את דעת אלוהי אביך ועבדהו ואת השויתי ה' לנגדי תמיד. So what *Dovid Hamelech* told to his son Shlomo is what we should be telling ourselves and our children. Not just serve Hashem, but know Hashem. When you come to know Hashem, you love Him. To know Him is to love Him, and to know Him is to feel His love for us, to think about our lives and feel His love for us. To know Him is to love Him and to feel His love and to feel our mission and to know He needs us and to feel ourselves giving Him *nachas*. And that's a life worth living. That's a meaningful life. That's a reason you're here despite the other billions of people on this globe. That's worth the effort. It's worth the effort. There's so many people in so much pain, feeling so empty and so hollow and searching for such meaning and we've got the prescription right here. It's *emunah* and *bitachon*. Hashem's like waving, He's like hi, all day He's messaging us and signaling us and waving to us and poking us, I'm here! And this is the answer. It doesn't mean it'll be an easy life. All these emails are people trouble with parnassah and trouble with shidduchim and trouble with fertility and trouble with. The emuna doesn't take away the challenges, but it gives us the strength and the resilience and the resolve to navigate them. It's hard work. It's hard work. That's why Dovid told Shlomo, who was a grown man and who was the wisest of all men, and yet Dovid told him, told him, da, know God. And serve him. Know him. Come to know, listen to him. Read about him. Read his diary. Experience the natural world, come to know him through his art, his sculpture. Come to know him, you know how you come to know God? Of course tour the land of Israel, but also go to Wyoming and Montana and the national parks, go to the Colorado Rocky, the not the Colorado Rocky, the Canadian Rockies. Go see, you come to know God. אין צור כאלהינו אין צר כאלהינו, study him, da, know God. You can't see the Swiss Alps and be the same afterwards. I don't think you can. You can if you were looking at your phone the whole time, but put your phone aside, leave it at home. The national parks, the ones I've visited at least still have no service, which is the greatest gift in the world. Go and you find Hashem everywhere there. Break out of your routine and go find Hashem and study him and know him and feel his presence and talk to him. For God's sake, talk to him. Talk to him. If you don't talk to Hashem without the siddur, you'll never be able to talk to him with him. Talk to him outside shul, you can't talk to him in shul if you never talk to him outside shul. I met yesterday with somebody who's struggling with their davening. I said, "Do you ever talk to him outside shul or outside the siddur?" Said, "Not so much." I said, "Then why would you expect to be able to talk to him in shul and with the siddur?" Talk to him the beginning of every day, what's coming up that day, what do you need his help, thank him as it goes. Talk to him. Know him. It's hard work. דע את אלהי אביך ועבדהו know God, שויתי השם לנגדי תמיד each and every day. im yirtzeh Hashem Monday morning next week, 8:45 AM. Not Wednesday, Monday morning. If Hashem wills it we will pick up next time. Tonight 9:00 behind the bema with Rabbi Kalman Samuels of Shalva until next time, stay happy, stay healthy, and stay holy.
