Transcript
Good morning Boker Tov, welcome back ladies to Living with Emuna. Ladies and gentlemen who are watching I guess online. Want to express our gratitude to our series sponsor Dr. Zavi and Bella Morgan in memory of Rabbi Dr. Brian Galbut, in memory of Bella’s mother Dr. Ellen Schanzer. We remain very grateful to the Morgans for sponsoring each and every week. This morning’s shiur is also sponsored by Cara and Dr. Ben Friedman in memory of Cara’s mother Helen Cohen, on what would have been her 79th birthday. We certainly remember Helen very well. Incredibly dignified woman of great faith, tremendous emuna, and had a huge impact on our community and on us, and we remember her today. And also dedicated for חיה אסתר טילא בת אריה ציפורא, she should have strength and comfort and Hashem should shower His love upon her. Okay, we are on Tivei HaEmuna. We're learning Rav Gamliel Rabinowitz, Tivei HaEmuna. All about the importance of having emuna, of living with emuna, of living with faith. So we’re on the bottom of page Ayin-aleph, page 71. Bottom of page Ayin-aleph. מי שעמל וזכה כבר הגיע להכרה זו. So a person who’s achieved it. And we’ve spoken about this, we’ve spoken about all of this before. We just repeat ourselves each and every week and yet you come back. Rav Gamliel Rabinowitz points out: emuna is not something you accomplish, you achieve, emuna is not something that you’re finished with or you’re done with. Emuna you don’t put a checkbox next to. When you shook the lulav or you heard the shofar, you sat in the succah, you’re done. But when you’re working on emuna, you never finish. You never put a check, you’re never done. You don’t ever say or feel I’ve accomplished emuna, I have emuna. What were the things—oh I had to buy the new thing, I had to get a dresser for my kid, I had to buy the new phone, oh I got emuna, I’m good, check, I picked up some emuna, I was at the supermarket, can’t believe what it cost these days, I picked up some emuna. Emuna you don’t pick up, emuna you don’t buy, emuna you don’t order on Amazon, and emuna you’re never done with. You’re never done with. שוב אין צריך להעיר ולהעורר כל פעם מחדש. You don’t say, you know, I have it and therefore I’m done. But rather a person has to always be working, evolving, exercising the emuna muscle or putting on the emuna glasses, whatever metaphor or mashal we want to use. But a person always has to be working on that sense of emuna. But when we have emuna, there should be a foundation. When we wear those glasses or we get that LASIK surgery and we see Hashem in the world everywhere we turn. We feel His presence, we feel His love, we see everything as being ordained from above. Nothing is random or chance or coincidence, but everything is by design. Then we don’t have to reawaken and re-establish and struggle with our emuna each time from the beginning. אין צריך להעיר ולהעורר כל פעם מחדש. ואין צריך להעמיד לו מוכיחים, kum le-tefilla, or kera krias shema, tanei amen, אמן יהא שמיה רבא. Each time we encounter either a conflict or a crisis of faith or each time we encounter in our tefilla, in our prayer, we encounter Hashem, we shouldn’t have to stop and start all over again. Oh yeah, אמן יהא שמיה רבא, I forgot there’s a great name and I want to sanctify it. Oh yeah, shema, קבלת עול מלכות שמים, there’s God and I have to accept the yoke of heaven upon myself. Oh yeah, there’s Hashem and I have to stand before Him in tefilla and have a intimate rendezvous with Him and confide in Him. כי כאשר הוא מרגיש שזהו החיים. When a person feels this is life, אזי אינו שוכח לחיות. You don’t forget to live. So meaning, breathing. Do you ever forget to breathe? When you realize that your life depends on breathing, we have a spontaneous, we’ve conditioned ourselves to breathe regularly. To breathe regularly. You could work on your breathing. I actually recently read a whole book on breath. This person met countless experts and practiced and different ways that you breathe and through the nose, out the mouth, in the nose and out the nose, holding your breath, how long you can learn to hold your breath, Navy SEALs underwater can hold their breath four, five, six minutes at a time, longer periods, incredible amounts. There are ways you could learn to breathe better. An athlete, sleep apnea, improving your sleep, mindfulness and meditation. You can learn how to breathe better. But you don’t have to ever every day go, okay what do I have to do today? I have to remember to breathe. I have to remember to shower. I have to remember to eat. I have to remember to. There are things that we know are the life force, the life source. We can’t live without them and we don’t need to remember to do them. And on that list says Rav Gamliel should be emuna. Wake up in the morning and it’s not I have to remember to have emuna, it’s that that is how I interpret and see and experience the entire world around me. That whatever’s happening. כמו שאין צריך לעורר אדם להזהיר שיאכל, הוא יודע שבזה חייו תלויים. You don’t have to remember to eat. Many of us have to remember to stop eating. We don’t have to remember to start eating. We have to remember to stop. It's okay, you can stop now, you're full, you're done, you have enough, it's okay. כן למי שהגיע להכרה פנימית ומוחשית מה חובתו בעולמו. So a person who gets to a point that they say, what is my duty, my purpose, my obligation, my responsibility, why am I here? Not in the world, ma chovaso be'olamo, why am I in my world? I woke up today in my world and my world has whatever's going on in it, with whoever is in it. My world is in this place at this time with these people. I have these strengths and these weaknesses, these assets, these liabilities. This is my total picture, this is my world. What's my obligation in it? Not what are my rights and entitlements, not what's coming to me, not what am I wake up and the world has to serve me, what am I meant to do with it? How do I make the world a better place? Ein tzorich and what drives that question is that I'm here to serve him. The drives that question is I only am alive because of his graciousness, his kindness, his love. I only have breath in my lungs, I only have a roof over my head, I only have whatever I have because of him. Why did he put me here? What does he want from me? אין צריך לעוררו ולחזקו בכל רגע מה שצריך לעשות. Each day you don't have to wake up again and say, you know, Rav Gamliel gives the example of eating, we gave the example of breathing, but I'll give another example, two other examples. You don't wake up every day and say just am I married or single? Oh, that's right, let me remember I'm married today. That's a part of your identity, your core identity, it's who you are. Even more than that because some people need to remember more that they're married and the decisions they make and how they spend their time and so on. You know Sfas Emes says there's a minhag, there's a minhag that you get a chosson a watch. A zeiger, you get him a watch. Why do you get a chosson a watch? Not everybody has this minhag but many have the minhag. The chosson, he becomes a chosson, he gets a watch. You know becoming a bride or groom today is like, you know the Price is Right, you win the lottery, you get just what gifts, showcase showdown, you get everything. You know this is the assumption: what you're getting, what you deserve, what you need. All kinds of twenty-year-old boys are walking around with nicer watches than their fathers and fathers-in-law combined. But anyway, we'll leave that aside for a moment. We'll leave that aside for a moment. So Sfas Emes says why is the minhag to get a young man a watch? Why? There's a beautiful Sfas Emes. Because the father-in-law is essentially saying to the son-in-law, says, 'I want you to know until now your time was your own. You sat in the beis medrash as late as you want, you hung out in the dormitory, you went out with the boys, you watched the game, you did what you want when you want, you woke up when you want, which minyan you wanted to go to. Until now your time was your own. But I'm giving you my daughter and your time is no longer your own. See this watch? Look at it and have a time awareness and a time consciousness and a mindfulness and know that even if you're doing something noble like still sitting in the beis medrash, my daughter will be sitting at home waiting for you to return. She made dinner, be on time. You told her what time you'd be back from night seder, be on time. You told her you'd pick something up at the grocery store. Look at that watch and remember.' So beautiful Sfas Emes. The reason we give a watch is remember you're married. You know yesterday you were just another one of the bochurim hanging out in the beis medrash, in the dorm, you were with the boys. Look at your wrist, see that fancy expensive watch I had to take a mortgage for, and remember, and remember that my daughter's waiting for you at home. It's a beautiful Sfas Emes on why there's a minhag to get a watch. So some husbands, some wives can forget they're married. But I don't think anyone forgets they're a parent. No matter where you are, no matter what you're doing, maybe mothers or women excel at this more than men. You could be on vacation, you haven't pulled out of the driveway, and the wife said we should check on the kids. Are the kids okay? You're like we just said goodbye to them, we haven't pulled out of the driveway. Yes but are they okay? Do they have a plan? Will everything be alright? Can we really leave them? No matter where you go and no matter what you're doing, no matter where you go no matter what you're doing, thank you, you know that you're a parent, you know that you're a parent. You don't have to wake up in the morning and say yes, oh that's right, I have children. Oh how many? Who are they? What are their names? Where are they? No matter what you're distracted by, no matter what you're doing, no matter where you are, you're always a parent and that's part of a core identity, it's part of a core consciousness. Those who are waiting and longing should be blessed with healthy children, those who want to know that identity and that feeling should be rewarded with that. But that's part of your very core identity. So Rav Gamliel says that's emunah. Chevre, that's what we're working on. That it's not that I have emunah on Wednesday morning from 8:45 till whenever and then from the rest of Wednesday until through Tuesday I daven, I do all these things, but I forget to work on emunah. It's that emunah is like I'm not a parent only during carpool, I'm a parent till they fall asleep at night, I'm a parent until I get out on vacation, I'm a parent, it's my identity, it's who I am. I'm married, that's my core identity, it's who I am, it's intertwined with my who I am. So similarly emunah is intertwined with who I am. There's no moment in the day where I forget there's Hashem so I made a decision that he would be dissatisfied or disappointed in. There's no moment in my day that I act selfishly and I only care about myself or my needs and I forget that I'm here to serve him, just like I can't forget I'm a parent or I'm a spouse, I can't forget I'm married and in a relationship with Hashem. That's how core it needs to be. That's how obvious it needs to be. That's how much we need to wake up with that, with that sense. That's what we're trying to achieve, that's what we're trying to go, that's what we're trying to get to, is to remember that this is why, that this is what happened, that this is for a reason. And then it'll permeate our every day, we don't have to look for it and make it kick in when we're already in the crisis. Whether it's a minor crisis, my old phone had a problem, I got a new phone, I transferred everything over, I transferred WhatsApp, I noticed everything was missing and then I realized that for whatever reason it hadn't backed up since March of 2020. So every picture, every video, every conversation, every everything. Now that could be a lot of data, of information, of really family beautiful things, as a rabbi, conversations that were important to keep and to have a record of. So I started to get anxious and then I said, hey dope, you teach the Emuna shiur. Like, this is what was meant to be. So then I spent way too much time and figured it out and undid the old phone and was able to get it and back it up and move it over and Baruch Hashem I only lost three days of data, which is more than I can, I'm more than okay with. But I want you to know genuinely and sincerely, Yocheved will tell you, that even before I solved it and thought I had lost it, I said, okay, this is what Hashem wants. That's the plan. It's frustrating, it's annoying, I'll have to rely on colleagues who were in the same conversation to find the thing that we spoke about three years ago, I'll have to rely on family if they still have the picture or video that I think I remember when we were somewhere together, but okay, that, okay, that's it. So, if you wait until you're frustrated, you're anxious, you're angry, you're resentful, you're panicked, and then you're like, oh, let me work on Emuna. Which is when I get the phone call. Rabbis get the phone call when I'm going through a crisis, catastrophe, rabbi I need to meet with you. I don't make sense of this, where is God, why is this happening, how do I get through it, where do I get the. Now you could work on Emuna your whole life and some crises are so big that you still feel that way, I'm not judging at all anyone who struggles with faith even if they've been working on faith their whole life, chalila I'm not judging that whatsoever, but I'm saying if you've never worked out on it at all, then you'll be in trouble. Then you'll be in trouble. There was a, I don't remember if I ever told you this story in this context. There was someone in our shul who had a massive heart attack and I went to the hospital to visit him. And I'm in the middle of visiting him and he says to me, you know rabbi, the Carlebach minyan saved my life. And I thought, at first I thought, so sweet, the niggunim and Shlomo's sweetness and his love and the fact that he had a chevra, community that he davened with and maybe they visited him, and that's so sweet that the Carlebach minyan saved his life, that's so sweet. He said to me, no no, you don't understand. He said when I started going to the Carlebach minyan, Carlebach minyan everyone's hopping and bopping and dancing and clapping and I couldn't keep up, I was winded, I was out of breath. But every Friday night I wanted a piece of that, I wanted to dance in the circle, I wanted to bang on the bima, I wanted to know what it was like to get so lost in the davening. But I couldn't keep up, I was so out of shape, I was so winded, that I started to work out. And because I started to work out, the doctor said when I had the heart attack, if I was in the condition I had been in three months ago, I never would have survived, I would have died. So it's only because of the Carlebach minyan that had got me for three months starting to work out that my heart was in a position that when I had the heart attack, that's the only reason that I survived. That's the only reason that I made it. So he said the Carlebach minyan saved my life. The happy clappy minyan saved my life. So Rav Gamliel says, if you're waiting for the crisis, every one of us will have a roller coaster, and I give you a bracha, the biggest crisis should be that your WhatsApp didn't back up. That should be the biggest crisis in any of our lives. But there are real and significant and irreversible and devastating catastrophic crises that go on in people's lives. And if we wait for that moment, that confrontation, and we don't have a foundation of Emuna of faith and we're first looking to find Hashem, we're going to be in big trouble, we may not survive, our heart may not make it. Yocheved and I last night, participated, we had to record it, but participated, Ohel had done a conversation on pregnancy loss, miscarriage, stillbirth, I told you about the last one we did a couple months ago, there were so many questions there was a part two, there was a follow-up. So last night was the follow-up, was part two. And we were talking in part two last night about how important that is in our own experience of the stillbirth all those years ago, the role that Emuna played in feeling that this was from above. They never found out why, even a chromosomal analysis and the anatomy, they never understood why it happened, which even though that was frustrating, but for us, that also gave chizuk, because we couldn't explain it naturally. We had absolute no choice but to find Hashem in it, to assume some... How it was His will, we don't know why, we don't wish it, we don't want it, but it was His will. So we were talking about the role of emuna when you go through a difficult time, the role of emuna and how you cannot survive if you believe that you're just a victim of randomness, you're just a statistic anomaly, just somebody had to have it and the wheel spun and it landed on you. That's when I don't know how you get through it. I don't know how anyone gets through anything unless they can feel there's something bigger and someone bigger and a bigger picture and a bigger reason and a bigger purpose. But if you wait to find them until that moment you'll be in trouble. So in part one of this OU webinar Yocheved made the point of how amazing her doctor was when we went through this and that people when they find a doctor should include in caring about the doctor's competency and skill set their bedside manner. You don't hope to ever need them when you'll be in a crisis but you know you don't only want somebody, "well they're brilliant and they're an expert and they have five rating stars online and even though they have no bedside manner they're cold as ice, they're harsh and insensitive, but what do I care, I'll never need that, I just need them to read the x-ray or give me the lab report." You don't know when you may need them. Find someone that if you would need them that's who you'd want in the war room with you. She made that point in part one. In part two we made the point with emuna and that's what Rav Gamliel is saying here. You can't wait to be me'orer and to be mechazek. You can't wait to discover and to awaken and to strengthen your emuna when you'll need it. You can't wait till when you'll need it. It'll be too late. If a person is out of shape and they have a massive heart attack you can't just start to get in shape then. Your heart may not survive depending on how big a shock the heart receives. And similarly spiritually, our spiritual heart gets shocked, it gets trauma in this world and we need to be in spiritual shape so that if or when we experience that trauma we'll be able to endure it, we'll be able to get through it. Okay let's continue page Ayin-Beis. גם התורה והמצוות שאנו מקיימים הם מתנה ממנו יתברך. Did I mention last time the hotspot analogy, Wi-Fi and hotspot? I don't think I mentioned it last time. So what happens if you're struggling? I think that's where we left off as I kept saying I'm going to talk about it. What happens if you're struggling? You're not there. So you say it's not a matter of I have emuna so I won't have to awaken arouse it I won't have to strengthen it but you say I'm struggling I come to the emuna shiur, I read the emuna books, I signed up for emuna WhatsApp and emuna emails and emuna newsletters and still I'm just not feeling Him. So what do you do then? What do you do then? I don't remember if I mentioned it, you'll excuse me if I did, but you don't remember either so it's fine. ברוך אתה ה' אלוקינו מלך העולם שהכל נהיה בדברו. Amen. So if you're ever in a place that has no, you have no internet connection but there's someone who does, what do you do? You say but I want to feel connected, I want to be connected, I need to download and upload and text and connect, I need access, I need to be connected. But what do you do? You've had that. Go back to the analogy, you're away with your family and your kids are panicked, "I have no bars, anyone have bars, does anyone have connection, I have no connection, anyone have connection, you're on AT&T, you're on Sprint, who has connection, you're on T-Mobile?" And then one person says, "yeah I have connection, I have good connection." What does everybody say to that person? Turn your phone into a hotspot. What's a hotspot? Any of you know what a hotspot is? You could make your phone a hotspot that other people can connect to your phone and connect to the internet through your phone. Your phone becomes a router, your phone becomes a modem. You can turn your phone into a hotspot so others can connect through your phone. So people don't have a connection but they desperately want to be connected and they're trying but they don't. If you've ever been to a national park, you've ever been to a beautiful exotic location, you'll see the people instead of enjoying their hike they're like standing on the edge of a cliff or on top of a mountain and they're holding the phone in the air, "I got half a bar, I got half a bar." It's like, "someone quick check the stock market, what's it doing today?" Everybody's panicked because they're not connected. Then one person has connection, "turn it into a hotspot, turn it into, give me the password, turn it into a hotspot, let me connect through you, let me connect through you." So sometimes with emuna we're struggling to connect, we're struggling. We don't have a bar two, we don't have half a bar, we have no connection, no connection. And by the way it just occurred to me, you know what it says on my phone when I have no connection? SOS. Does that come up on the top of your phone with no connection? SOS. Because if you have no connection you're SOS, it's an SOS. It's an emergency situation when you have no connection. Not when you have no connection with your phone, when you have no connection with Hashem. It's an SOS situation. Anyway so if you have no connection... Spiritually of no connection with someone, find somebody who's connected. Find somebody. Find a survivor, find somebody who has tremendous emuna, find somebody who lives with faith and use them as a hotspot. Connect to them, attach yourself to them, ask them why they feel this way, how they feel this way, just connect to their energy. They'll lift you with their energy. You'll connect, they'll become your hotspot through their energy, find that person, hang out with that person, talk to that person, confide in that person, connect through their energy, through their hotspot. Okay, גם התורה והמצווה שאנו מקיימים הם מתנה ממנו יתברך. The Torah and the mitzvos that we fulfill that Hashem gives us are a gift from above. ואין לנו לחשוב כאילו אנחנו עושים טובה להקדוש ברוך הוא ומגיע לנו שכר על זה. Many people mistakenly go through life thinking, we've done a generous good thing for Hashem. I did mitzvos for you. You happy? You happy? I woke up early, I daven Shacharis, you happy? I said Tehillim. You happy? I sat in the Sukkah, it was hot as anything. You happy? I was careful to only eat kosher. I did it for you. I took it for the team. I self-sacrificed. I gave in for you. I gave in for you. But it's a mistake. It's a huge mistake. אלא זכות גדולה לנו שאנו זוכין לעשות רצונו על ידי לימוד התורה וקיום המצוות. Kadosh Baruch Hu says you think you're doing something, you think you're doing a favor for me? That's like the child who says, I did the math homework. You happy? I finished. I'm done. You happy? I'm done with math. I did it for you. I did the math homework. You happy? I finished the report. So honey, sweetie, you didn't do that for me. You did that for you so you could add two numbers together. You did that for you so you'll become an adult and mature. Finished chazering Gemara, I finished reviewing the Mishnah for the test. You happy? I studied for the test. Sweetie, you didn't clean your room for me. You didn't brush your teeth for me. You didn't study the math for me. You did it for you. When I am after you, and I child, am holding you accountable and you responsible, and I'm supervising you, and I'm telling you what's expected of you, it's not for me. You're not doing a favor for me. It's for you. It's for you. So Ribono Shel Olam looks down, he says, 613 things I have that will enhance your life, that will enrich your life, that will make your life incredible, that will give you the highest speed connection to me. They're not for me, Hashem says, they're for you. So when you put the check next to them, don't think you did me a favor. You didn't do it for me. You did it to enhance your life. ובכל פעולה שעושים צריכים לחשוב מה רצון השם בזה. So every decision, every behavior, everything we do every day we have to ask ourselves, what does Hashem want? What will give Hashem nachas in this moment? What will give Hashem nachas? ואיך מתקרבים להקדוש ברוך הוא על ידי זה. How will I get close to him through this decision? Where should we go on vacation? Where should my children go for school? Who should we have for Shabbos for a meal? How should I spend the next hour? I have some free time, what should I watch, should I watch, listen to, I'm in the car. Every decision, human beings are decision-making animals. We make an incredible number of decisions every single day. More than ever, because the choices are more than ever, just which salad dressing to get at the supermarket can be exhausting. We have, we suffer from, psychologists say today, something called decision fatigue, which didn't exist in antiquity. How many decisions did you have to make? Tevye on the farm, he fed the goats and the cows, what decisions did he have to make? Should I get the spicy tuna sushi or the poke bowl, or should I stop and get the shawarma or should I like, which decision did he have to make? And you even go to, no, what's, what's the street down south that has 400 restaurants on one street here? In Surfside. You could have decision fatigue. You go to that, go out to, but maybe we should go there, but I heard that one, what if we're at the wrong one? We need to try this one. What, it's, just go home. Let's just go home and eat Cheerios and call it a day. Too exhausting, too much stress, too much doubt, too much regret. So people suffer from exhaustion, from decision fatigue today because we have too many decisions to make in any day. But the decisions should all be informed and inspired by the question, what does Hashem want? What will give Hashem nachas? I don't live for me, I live for him. I'm here on assignment. I'm here on a mission. What does he want for me? Now he wants it to be a balanced mission. Even when you're here on assignment and here on a mission, he wants you to sleep and eat and relax. He wants you to play mah-jongg or tennis or golf. He wants you to enjoy recreation. You know the etymology of the word recreation? Is to re-create. We need to re-create ourselves, we need recreation in our lives. We need to have fun and we need to laugh and we need to experience joy. We need to have downtime and turn off those decisions and just be. Just be. I enjoy tennis. You know why tennis, you know why I enjoy tennis? Because when you're in the middle of a point, the only thing you're thinking about is the ball coming back to you, what you'll do with it. You can't be thinking about the to-do list or the emails or who you have to call, what you have to visit, or what decision with your children or what. * *Wait, I need to make sure I don't repeat the context.*
* *Context ends at:* "Sorry."
* *Audio starts at:* "If you're not going to try to win, if you're not going to try to win. But but that's all you're lost in that moment..."
* *Wait, the context says:* "All the decisions are put on hold because all you could think about or you'll lose the point don't bother playing if you're not going to win. That's, and that's not the best attitude, that's my attitude. Sorry."
* *The audio provided for this chunk starts with:* "If you're not going to try to win, if you're not going to try to win. But but that's all you're lost in that moment..."
* *Okay, I will start from "If you're not going to try to win".*
* *Wait, "nachas" is Yiddish.* `nachas`.
* *Wait, "Hashem" is Hebrew.* `Hashem`.
* *Wait, "Moshe" is Hebrew.* `Moshe`.
* *Wait, "Moshe Rabbeinu" is Hebrew.* `Moshe Rabbeinu`.
* *Wait, "Sefer Yehoshua" is Hebrew.* `Sefer Yehoshua`.
* *Wait, "Moshe Avdi" is Hebrew.* `Moshe Avdi`.
* *Wait, "ma'alah" is Hebrew.* `ma'alah`.
* *Wait, "eved" is Hebrew.* `eved`.
* *Wait, "Avodas Hashem" is Hebrew.* `Avodas Hashem`.
* *Wait, "Shacharis" is Hebrew.* `Shacharis`.
* *Wait, "Mincha" is Hebrew.* `Mincha`.
* *Wait, "Maariv" is Hebrew.* `Maariv`.
* *Wait, "Yud Shevat" is Hebrew.* `Yud Shevat`.
* *Wait, "Chabad" is Hebrew.* `Chabad`.
* *Wait, "Rebbe" is Hebrew/Yiddish.* `Rebbe`.
* *Wait, "tefillin" is Hebrew.* `tefillin`.
* *Wait, "Taryag Mitzvos" is Hebrew.* `Taryag Mitzvos`.
* *Wait, "Rebbetzin" is Yiddish.* `Rebbetzin`.
* *Wait, "Hashem" is used in the English parts.*
* "What will give Hashem nachas?" -> "What will give `Hashem` `nachas`?"
* "What does Hashem want from me in this moment?" -> "What does `Hashem` want from me in this moment?"
* "What'd you think how'd that go Hashem?" -> "What'd you think how'd that go `Hashem`?"
* "Oh our adventure Hashem..." -> "Oh our adventure `Hashem`..."
* *Wait, "Moshe" is used in the English parts.*
* "Moshe is Moshe Avdi because..." -> "`Moshe` is `Moshe Avdi` because..."
* "Moshe had a wife and he had children and Moshe had a life..." -> "`Moshe` had a wife and he had children and `Moshe` had a life..."
* "Moshe Rabbeinu did not make any self-centered decision." -> "`Moshe Rabbeinu` did not make any self-centered decision."
* "Moshe my loyal slave, Moshe my loyal servant." -> "`Moshe` my loyal slave, `Moshe` my loyal servant."
* "Moshe Avdi, Moshe my loyal slave..." -> "`Moshe Avdi`, `Moshe` my loyal slave..."
* "Moshe Rabbeinu is referred to he's called Moshe my loyal servant." -> "`Moshe Rabbeinu` is referred to he's called `Moshe` my loyal servant."
* *Wait, "Rebbe" is used in the English parts.*
* "The Rebbe never took a day off." -> "The `Rebbe` never took a day off."
* "From the day that he ascended to be the Rebbe..." -> "From the day that he ascended to be the `Rebbe`..."
* "By the way the Rebbe said every day the Rebbe had tea with his wife..." -> "By the way the `Rebbe` said every day the `Rebbe` had tea with his wife..."
* "And the Rebbe said that tea with his wife daily was as significant as meaningful and as important to him that he wouldn't miss as putting tefillin on every day." -> "And the `Rebbe` said that tea with his wife daily was as significant as meaningful and as important to him that he wouldn't miss as putting `tefillin` on every day."
* "Which is a very beautiful image because we know what tefillin mean to the Rebbe." -> "Which is a very beautiful image because we know what `tefillin` mean to the `Rebbe`."
* "Tefillin aside from being one of the Taryag Mitzvos, we know what tefillin mean meant to the Rebbe..." -> "`Tefillin` aside from being one of the `Taryag Mitzvos`, we know what `tefillin` mean meant to the `Rebbe`..."
* *Wait, "Rebbetzin" is used in the English parts.*
* "Spending time with his Rebbetzin." -> "Spending time with his `Rebbetzin`."
* "That tea with his Rebbetzin was a lifeline for him every day..." -> "That tea with his `Rebbetzin` was a lifeline for him every day..."
* *Wait, "tefillin" is used in the English parts.*
* "Putting tefillin on every day." -> "Putting `tefillin` on every day."
* "We know what tefillin mean to the Rebbe." -> "We know what `tefillin` mean to the `Rebbe`."
* "Tefillin aside from being one of the Taryag Mitzvos..." -> "`Tefillin` aside from being one of the `Taryag Mitzvos`..."
* "We know what tefillin mean meant to the Rebbe..." -> "We know what `tefillin` mean meant to the `Rebbe`..."
* "Than putting on tefillin, than putting on tefillin..." -> "Than putting on `tefillin`, than putting on `tefillin`..."
* *Wait, "Chabad" is used in the English parts.*
* "On the Chabad calendar." -> "On the `Chabad` calendar."
* *Wait, "Sefer Yehoshua" is used in the English parts.*
* "In Sefer Yehoshua Moshe Rabbeinu is referred to..." -> "In `Sefer Yehoshua` `Moshe Rabbeinu` is referred to..."
* *Wait, "Moshe Avdi" is used in the English parts.*
* "Moshe is Moshe Avdi because..." -> "`Moshe` is `Moshe Avdi` because..."
* *Wait, "Avodas Hashem" is used in the English parts.*
* "Not Avodas Hashem at Shacharis." -> "Not `Avodas Hashem` at `Shacharis`."
* *Wait, "Taryag Mitzvos" is used in the English parts.*
* "One of the Taryag Mitzvos." -> "One of the `Taryag Mitzvos`."
* *Wait, "Yud Shevat" is used in the English parts.*
* "When I read the Yud Shevat significant day..." -> "When I read the `Yud Shevat` significant day..."
* *Wait, "ma'alah" is used in the English parts.*
* "What is the ma'alah?" -> "What is the `ma'alah`?"
* *Wait, "eved" is used in the English parts.*
* "An eved, a servant..." -> "An `eved`, a servant..."
* *Wait, "nachas" is used in the English parts.*
* "What will give Hashem nachas?" -> "What will give `Hashem` `nachas`?"
* *Wait, "Moshe Rabbeinu" is used in the English parts.*
* "Moshe Rabbeinu did not make any self-centered decision." -> "`Moshe Rabbeinu` did not make any self-centered decision."
* *Wait, "Hakadosh Baruch Hu" is used in the English parts?* No, only in the Hebrew block.
* *Wait, "Hashem" is used in the English parts.*
* "What'd you think how'd that go Hashem?" -> "What'd you think how'd that go `Hashem`?"
* "Oh our adventure Hashem..." -> "Oh our adventure `Hashem`..."
* *Wait, "Hashem" is used in the English parts.*
* "We say thank you to him..." (No Hebrew here).
* *Wait, "Hashem" is used in the English parts.*
* "What does Hashem want from me in this moment?" -> "What does `Hashem` want from me in this moment?"
* *Wait, "Moshe" is used in the English parts.*
* "Moshe is Moshe Avdi because..." -> "`Moshe` is `Moshe Avdi` because..."
* *Wait, "Moshe" is used in the English parts.*
* "Moshe had a wife and he had children and Moshe had a life..." -> "`Moshe` had a wife and he had children and `Moshe` had a life..."
* *Wait, "Moshe" is used in the English parts.*
* "Moshe Rabbeinu did not make any self-centered decision." -> "`Moshe Rabbeinu` did not make any self-centered decision."
* *Wait, "Moshe" is used in the English parts.*
* "Moshe my loyal slave, Moshe my loyal servant." -> "`Moshe` my loyal slave, `Moshe` my loyal servant."
* *Wait, "Moshe" is used in the We're only human, it's okay. We're only human. We're only human. But why do we need a day off? Is it that we're regularly taking days off, once in a while we spend a day on for him? Or is it that our lives are entirely on for him, and when we take the day off, it's so that we could come back bigger and better than ever for him? There's nothing wrong with needing time off. There's nothing wrong with—it's all right, someone's really trying to get through. Somebody will help, somebody will help. It's all right, it's what's meant to be, it's from Above. Turn it off. It's from Above, it's from Hashem. וכן מצינו באברהם אבינו, we see this with Avraham Avinu, כשהקדוש ברוך הוא אמר לו לשחוט את יצחק בנו, when the Ribono Shel Olam comes and tells Yitzchak, tells Avraham, you need to slaughter, you need to shecht your son. לא שאל ולא הרהר אחר הקדוש ברוך הוא, Avraham Avinu doesn't say what do you mean, how could you ask, how dare you, it can't be, no, I don't want to, I'm not going to, I need to think about it. קיים את המצווה בשמחה. That's what's asked of me in this moment. That's what I need to be doing. This is my charge and my mission. This is the test I need to rise to, then this is what I need to do. ואף על פי שעשה לסתור למה שלימד את כולם, I, Avraham Avinu just spent his entire life, his entire career, getting up on a soapbox, taking out billboards, taking out ads on TV, preaching and proselytizing against killing your own child. And now Hashem's asking him to do exactly what he's been telling others not to do. אולם אם זה רצון השם אזי צריך לקיים בלא שאלות וספקות. In every moment we have to ask ourselves, if what's asked of me in this moment is joyous and fun and fantastic and great news, we should be endlessly grateful to Hashem. הודו להשם כי טוב. Thank you, Hashem. If what's asked of us in this moment is to rise to an occasion of challenge and difficulty, even of loss, of grief, HaKadosh Baruch Hu, I don't know why, and I'm not happy, and I'm going to protest and object, and I got some big questions for you one day when I get upstairs, but if this is my mission right now, then this is what I have to do. I have to rise to this moment, I have no other choice. This is my moment, this is my mission. ולדאבון עינינו רחוקים אנו מאוד מהמציאות הזאת. I'll give you a little preview, Yocheved's writing an article right now. Don't give the preview, don't give it away. It's a great article. You'll have to wait. It's her article, not mine, I'm not entitled to give you the preview. But anyway, that same Emunah carries us through the good times and the bad times, and it needs to animate the background of everything going on. We shouldn't forget him when something happy happens. You don't leave him out when the joyous thing occurs. The Tehillim has to be said with the same passion, the same enthusiasm, the same fervor when the thing worked out and you're saying thank you as it did when we have the Tehillim gathering, the emergency Tehillim or the extra Tehillim or the Tehillim WhatsApp. I've never seen a Tehillim WhatsApp group for gratitude. The Tehillim WhatsApp groups where people are rotating and they take on and they say and they finish Tehillim over and over and over again when there's a crisis, when there's bad news, when something went wrong. I've not, maybe you have seen a Tehillim WhatsApp group: something went right! Hey, who wants to be in a Tehillim WhatsApp group, it turned out, the person recovered, turned out the person was found, turned out the person's all right, turned out the person got engaged, got married, turned out the person had a baby. Who wants to be part of a Tehillim WhatsApp group to say thank you? Most people would be like, no, I don't have time, I'm in the other Tehillim WhatsApp groups. We need to be just as enthusiastic in our thanks as we are in our desperate pleas and our cries for help. They have to go together, they have to be equal. Emunah needs to carry us in both directions and at both times. And at both—there's no atheist in the foxhole. Everybody's crying out and screaming to him when they think there's no one else and no way out other than him. But how about when it works out? How about when something amazing happens? Do we stop and do we say thank you with the same level of fervor and excitement? ולדאבון עינינו רחוקים אנו מאוד מהמציאות הזאת, ואין זה העיקר אצלנו מהו רצון השם שאנחנו צריכים לקיים. Rabban Gamliel, Nebach, to our great sorrow and sadness, we're so far away from reaching this level. To reach this level where every day, every second, every decision, before you press send on every email, will Hashem be proud of this email? Send. Is Hashem proud of this post on social media? Post. Is Hashem proud of this text message I've written back? Text. Is Hashem proud of the phone call I'm about to make? Dial. Is Hashem proud of where I'm about to go? Drive. That's the level, that's the level we're trying to reach, is that He's part of it all, He's behind the background of it all. Now, let's not pretend that we don't have this ever. We do, a little bit, sometimes healthy, sometimes unhealthy, in marriage. There are people who say, I can't go there, if my wife, if my husband found out, I can't buy that thing, they would be very unhappy. Don't—if they knew I said—I can't say this cause they wouldn't want me to say this or repeat this, like the article they're about to write. They wouldn't want me to... The notion that we have a consciousness of someone that we care about and that therefore informs the decisions that we make, we have. We have. In a healthy and in a good marriage, there's a relationship with someone... That their opinion and wanting them to be happy is a part of all the decisions that we make. So we already have this precedent. We already have the precedent. We already have the example. We're already living in that way. And what Emunah is asking us to do is to live it with him too. To live with that Hashem we're in a relationship. I care about you and I love you, and I'm indebted to you and I'm grateful to you, and I feel your love all the time. And because of that, I don't want to make decisions other than to think about you. Would this make you happy? Would this make you proud? Would this give you Nachas? It's an incredibly high level. Rav Gamliel Rabinovich is a Tzaddik. Tzaddik yesod olam. One of the Tzaddikim of our Dor, of our generation. And he's writing in his Tivei HaEmunah that this is a very difficult level. Halevai I should, he's writing it. So be comforted to know this is a very high level. Don't beat yourself up or feel bad or ashamed or guilty or not bother trying because you say this is never a level I can get to. But this is our aspiration. This is our goal. This is what we want to achieve. To get to that place where the consciousness and the mindfulness that we're in a relationship with Hashem is just as real and palpable and tangible as the fact that I married or I'm a parent, I have children. That consideration of Hashem's opinion and wanting to give him Nachas and make him happy is as important to me in my decisions and my speech and my behavior as it is an awareness that I want my wife or husband to be happy. I wouldn't want to disappoint them. ובאופן כזה שוכח לגמרי מהקדוש ברוך הוא אף על פי שמקיים את התורה והמצוות וגרוע מכך הוא שעלול לבוא גם כן לזלזול גמור בקיום התורה והמצוות. Rav Gamliel is bemoaning that this is a plague, an epidemic in our time. Of Yidden, of Jews who are going through the motions of Yiddishkeit, who are doing everything right on the outside. All that's missing, to quote Rav Weinberger from the other night, all that's missing is themselves. They're doing everything. Davven, check. Daf Yomi, check. Chessed, check. Tehillim group, check. Mitzvos, check. Check, check, check, check, check, check, check. They have done everything. All that's missing is themselves. All that's missing is you. If you didn't listen yet, you should listen to Rav Weinberger from the other night. When he comes, the energy in that room, the music, the dancing, his words, it carries me an entire year. I'm already waiting for next year's Farbrengen with Rav Weinberger. Next year's Tish, next year's time with him that we're together. It's unbelievable. If you weren't there, you should come next year. But it's not too late, you can still watch it. And his words, and he applied it both to our relationship with Hashem, but then he applied it also with our families. He told an unbelievable story of his father. And his father, and it went viral since then. That clip, you've probably been sent, but it's been everywhere. It's worthwhile watching the entire thing. It's worthwhile watching that story in that clip. But that's, that's what he spoke about. Nochach. Nochach. To be present, to be there, to be invested. Hillel, אם אני כאן הכל כאן. Not just I'm here, but all of me is here. Not I'm here but I'm on my phone scrolling or posting or texting or looking. I'm here, v'hakol kan, all of me is here with you. I'm nochach. I'm fully present. I'm fully opposite. I'm fully here. I'm with you. I'm with you. My brother-in-law Binyamin suggested maybe that's what it means, ויעתר יצחק לנוכח אשתו. When Yitzchak was davening for Rifka when they didn't have a child, what he was telling Rifka is, I'm not worried about me. Hashem promised Yitzchak he's going to have children. Yitzchak's good to go because Hashem told Yitzchak through him he's going to be fine. But Rifka's panicked. She's struggling with fertility. So Yitzchak is nochach. He says, I'm here. I'm nochach. I'm not distracted. I'm not going anywhere. I'm fully here. I'm fully invested. You have all of me. You have all of me. He's lenochach ishto. He was nochach in that moment. To be nochach. To be hineni. Hashem calls Moshe, hineni, nochach, אם אני כאן הכל כאן. So all that's missing, you have everything. All that's missing is you. It's the spouse who on anniversary, the spouse, here's a card, here's flowers, here's chocolates, here's a gift, there's jewelry. I wrote on Facebook how amazing you are. It's all, I've done everything. And the spouse, right, on the way out the door to hang out with the buddies, or totally emotionally detached, and feeling no affection or connection. Check, check, check, check, check. I gave you everything you're supposed to give on an anniversary. I remembered it was the anniversary. I remembered. I gave you everything. Here's a card, here's chocolate, here's flowers. I posted, I told the whole world you're the greatest spouse ever. Check, check, check, check, check. I did everything. And the wife says, thank you. You gave me everything except the most important thing. You didn't give me you. You didn't give me you. So the Ribono Shel Olam says, check, check. It's the check Yiddishkeit. The Yiddishkeit of checkmarks. Check, check, check. But did you give me you? You. Are you nochach? Are you fully present? Are you there? Are you invested? You? Are you you? שוכח לגמרי מהקדוש ברוך הוא. We forget, we tend to forget him. Because Hashem says I understand, you remembered me when you lit the candles. You remembered me when you said the Shacharis or the Tehillim, but did you remember me when you were at the supermarket and you saw the price of mayonnaise? Did you remember me? Did you remember me when you got stuck in traffic? Did you remember me when you lost it and your WhatsApp was wiped out? Did you remember me when the more difficult circumstances—were you with me? Was I nochach? Was I in the room? Was I in the car? Was I in the in the boardroom, operating room, negotiating room? Hakadosh Baruch Hu says I want to be there, I want to be in a relationship. And just like you won't do or say the things that you know the person you care about would be disappointed in if you did or said, don't do or say the things because if you care about me, that I'd be disappointed in either. מסופר על החפץ חיים—I'll end with this—מסופר על החפץ חיים שביקש לעשות אסיפה של גדולי הדור לחיזוק ענייני הדת. The holy Chofetz Chaim, the great Chofetz Chaim once wanted to make a great convention and assembly in order to strengthen people on religion. וביקש מהאדמו"ר בעל אמרי אמת מגור, and he asked the Ger Rebbe, the great Imrei Emes, sheyavo l'hishtatef ba'asifa. He asked the Ger Rebbe to come. Ve'Admor, the Rebbe, אמר לו שיש לו טעם כמוס שמחמת זה אינו יכול להשתתף באסיפה. He had a reason he couldn't participate. אמר לו החפץ חיים, 'איני יודע את הטעם הכמוס שלו אולם ראוי שיעשה חשבון אם יועיל לענות טעם זה לפני בית דין של מעלה ואם למעלה זה לא יתקבל הרי גם כאן אינו מתקבל'. Now, the only one who can give the Imrei Emes mussar is the Chofetz Chaim. But the Chofetz Chaim turned to the Imrei Emes when he told him the reason he couldn't be there and he said, "I don't know your reason, and I don't know if it's legitimate, but all I ask you is to wonder and ask yourself, will the בית דין של מעלה upstairs, will they find it legitimate? If you think upstairs they'll accept your excuse as legitimate, it's good by me. But if upstairs, when we're making an asifa to strengthen the Jewish people, religion, faith, your excuse why you can't make it, if it won't pass muster upstairs, then it's not good down here." וכששמע זאת האדמו"ר מיד לבש את מעילו והלך עמו אל האסיפה. When the Imrei Emes, the Ger Rebbe heard that, he immediately put on his coat and he ran out to go attend and participate in the in the asifa, in the asifa. That's what—now Rav Gamliel, quick to add in the bracket: What do you think? The Imrei Emes wanted to sip a pina colada by the poolside under the under the palm trees in Poland? In—that's where the Imrei Emes was? In Gur? No. Imrei Emes was not looking for an excuse. He wasn't busy playing Wordle so he couldn't go strengthen—couldn't go bim'chazek hadas. That is not why the Imrei Emes wasn't going. He had a legitimate excuse. But sometimes we can rationalize and make an excuse that's legitimate more legitimate than it is. Maybe the thing that was legitimate that he had to do, but he could have done both. Maybe he could have handed it off and someone else can do. When you consider when the cheshbon, when the way that we calculate, when the metric we use to calculate what we should do is not what feels good for us, but what would make Him proud, we'll come to different conclusions. So that's the tool, that's the instrument that we have to use. The tool and the instrument to measure our lives is not "What do I want? What do I need? What will make me happy in this moment?" but "What can I do for Him?" Not for Him that I'm sacrificing for Him, but what would give Him pride? Any more than, right, if I don't say that thing or go that place or buy that thing because it wouldn't make my wife happy, I'm not, "Well, I'm sacrificing for her." It's that I'm in a relationship and I care about the other person and the relationship is enriched and enhanced when I care about what the other person wants. That's why I'm doing it. And the same is true with Hashem. I love Him, I know He loves me, I'm in a relationship and I care. And because I care, it's part of the cheshbon of what He wants from me in that moment. We'll pick up im yirtzeh Hashem next time. Until next time, stay happy, stay healthy, and stay holy. Thank you, Rabbi. Thank you so much, Rabbi.
