Transcript
Okay, good morning, everyone. בוקר טוב *Boker Tov*. Wonderful to see you. Sorry for the slight delay, some technology challenges, but we are together now. And what a privilege as always to be able to study the פרשה *parsha* together. This week, פרשת ויגש *Parshas Vayigash*, and to tap into the פרשה *parsha* perspectives for today. There are no coincidences. The Torah portion that we read each week, we were designed and specifically meant to read that week. The messages in the פרשה *parsha* that week speak to our lives and who we are for that week. I want to thank our generous sponsors for the פרשה *parsha* series for the year, Becky and Ari Katz and family in memory of Becky's father David Grossman. Our learning should be לעילוי נשמת *l'ilui nishmas* דוד בן מנחם מנש *Dovid ben Menachem Manis*. This morning שיעור *shiur* is also sponsored by Yanina and Gordon Hass in memory of Yanina's mother, עדה ליטעמאן *Eda Leiteman*, חיה בת שמחה *Chaya bas Simcha*. Her יארצייט *yahrzeit* is tomorrow, נשמה שתהיה לה עליה *neshama she'tehiyeh lah aliyah*. And by Evelyn and Stanley Weiss in memory of Marvin Ehrenberg on his יארצייט *yahrzeit*, his נשמה *neshama* should have an עליה *aliyah* as well. Thank you so much.Okay, פרשת ויגש *Parshas Vayigash*. Page 250 in the ArtScroll Stone חומש *Chumash*. Just a housekeeping note, no פרשה *parsha* class next week. I have a conflict, so I'm unable to teach next week, but we will פליז גאט *please God* resume two weeks from now. But I have good news for you. There are lots of previous פרשה שיעורים *parsha shiurim* online from countless people around the world who I'm sure give much better שיעורים *shiurim* than I do. But should you want to hear me, because you're having trouble sleeping at night, you can go on YU Torah or RabbiEphraimGoldberg.org and find שיעורים *shiurim* from previous years. ויגש אליו יהודה ויאמר בי אדני ידבר נא עבדך דבר באזני אדני ואל יחר אפך בעבדך כי כמוך כפרעה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda vayomer bi adoni yedaber na avdecha davar b'oznei adoni v'al yichar apcha b'avdecha ki chamocha k'Pharaoh*. יהודה *Yehuda*, courageously, יהודה *Yehuda* heroically, יהודה *Yehuda* steps up, he steps out, he approaches יוסף *Yosef*, not knowing of course that it's his brother יוסף *Yosef*, and he confronts him. And he says, Can I please speak to you? Don't get upset. Don't get frustrated. כי כמוך כפרעה *Ki chamocha k'Pharaoh*. Who is like you? You are like פרעה *Pharaoh*. You're so in command, you're so in charge. Can I come speak to you? And then he begins to review the entire history until that point. There's so many questions to ask on this opening. We've taken a look at it many times before, but what is going on here?First of all, what does it mean יהודה *Yehuda* is approaching יוסף *Yosef*? If you turn back one page in the חומש *Chumash*, there are חומשים *Chumashim* on the way in, you should always take one, easier to follow inside. At the very end of last week's פרשה *parsha*, we have a whole week in between. You have to do שנים מקרא ואחד תרגום *shnayim mikra v'echad targum*, so you shouldn't have a whole week, you should have less than a day in between. But in hearing the פרשה *parsha* being read in שול *shul*, there's a whole week in between. So we forget where we left off last week before we pick up this week. But at the end of last week's פרשה *parsha*, יהודה *Yehuda* is already talking to יוסף *Yosef*. So what does it mean ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*? What does it mean that יהודה *Yehuda* approaches יוסף *Yosef* and asks if he can continue? Moreover, he repeats part of a conversation that never happened. He quotes יוסף *Yosef* having said things that he never said. Moreover, he asks a question which is an absurd question about a father being alive, not alive, they've already discussed this. But mostly, most compellingly, the question is, why is יהודה *Yehuda* even recounting everything until this point? יוסף *Yosef* was there, he lived it. He lived it. Sometimes someone's telling you about something that just happened. Did you see that? This, that, and the other thing. And you say, yeah, I know, I was there. I'm hi, I'm right next to you. I was there the same time. You're so moved by the yeah, I'm there. יוסף *Yosef* is like, yeah, why are you yeah, I was there. I'm the other person you're quoting. Why are you bringing this up all now?So a few perspectives. First comes from ר' אליהו דושמיצר *Rav Eliyahu Dushmitzer*, who is the משגיח *mashgiach* of לומז'ה *Lomzha*. ר' אליהו דושניצר *Rav Eliyahu Dushnitzer* who says the following. דושניצר *Dushnitzer* says the following. He says כשיהודה ניגש לבקש לשחרר את בנימין, ומה מקום כאן לשטוח את כל ההיסטוריה שידועה היטב לשניהם *k'sheYehuda nigash l'vakeish l'shachreir et Binyamin, u'mah makom kan l'shtoach et kol ha'historia she'yeduah heitev l'shneihem*? The whole point is to advocate, to lobby for the release of בנימין *Binyamin*. בנימין *Binyamin* has been falsely accused, he's unjustly being held. יהודה *Yehuda* took personal responsibility, he promised his father he was going to bring him home. So get right to the get right to the story. Why is he starting from the beginning of first השם *Hashem* created the world in six days? What are you going all the way back to the beginning? אלא מכאן שגם כשהדברים ידועים ישנה כוח ועולם שכאשר מנחסים את כל הפרטים מול האדם בבהירות העניינים *Ela mikan she'gam k'shehadvrim yeduim yeshna koach v'olam she'ka'asher menachsim es kol hapratim mul ha'adam b'vehirut ha'inyanim*. You see a very important point here. He says, You see that sometimes even when you already know all these facts, it's worth reviewing them because it gives clarity. We're always moving in super speed. We're always at motion. Slow down. Slow down, review how you got here, review where you are, think about what's happening, create a sense of order. Judaism tremendously values the notion of סדר *seder*, the notion of order. לכן בחר יהודה לחזור על אודותם תמצית, כדי שעל ידי הבהירות תתברר ליוסף חובתו לשחרר את בנימין *Lachen bachar Yehuda lachzor al odosam tamtzis, k'dei she'al y'dei ha'behirut tisbarer l'Yosef chovaso l'shachrer es Binyamin*. So you're right, if he jumps right into the advocacy, if he jumps right into making the case for why בנימין *Binyamin* should go free, יוסף *Yosef* is already caught up in the drama. But he says, you know what, let's slow down. Let's go back to the very beginning. Let's remind ourselves how we got here. Let's be מסדר *mesader*. Let's organize, let's be on the same page, let's make sure we're discussing the same facts, let's make sure we're talking about the same thing. כוח זהו יסוד גדול גם בלימוד התורה הקדושה וגם בענייני מוסר ויראת שמים, שעל ידי האדם מסדר את סוגיות חייו ומברר לעצמו מה חובתו בעולמו ולאיכן הוא בכוחותיו המיוחדים יכול להגיע, מאיר לו אור חדש *Koach zehu yesod gadol gam b'limud haTorah ha'kdosha v'gam b'inyanei musar v'yiras shamayim, she'al yedei ha'adam mesader es sugyos chayav u'mevarer l'atzmo mah chovaso b'olamo ul'heichan hu b'kochosav ha'meyuchadim yachol l'hagia, me'ir lo or chadash*. He says, what a powerful lesson when it comes to Torah learning. You know, if you're learning the דף היומי *Daf Yomi*, boom boom boom, טשיק טשאק טשאק *chik chak chak*, you're turning the pages, you're moving, you're flying, you end a מסכתא *masechta*, you don't even remember you were there to begin with. In learning, you're going through the סוגיא *sugya*, you're hearing the שיעור *shiur*, you're flying through, you don't stop and you don't pause and you don't organize, and you don't picture, and you don't have a clarity on the סוגיא *sugya*. And what's true in the world of Torah, the סוגיא *sugya*, we don't have a holistic view of the topic, can also be true in our lives. Whatever we're analyzing, whatever we're confronting, whatever dilemma we're trying to make a decision about, stop and pause, and review, and organize, and have a clarity on the סוגיא *sugya*. Life is filled with סוגיות *sugyos*. Life is filled with סוגיות *sugyos* in our relationship, life is filled with סוגיות *sugyos* with our children, life is filled with סוגיות *sugyos* in our profession. Every day brings with it decisions that have to be made, dilemmas that have to be resolved. And if we're moving in super speed, and if we're not organized in our thought, and if we haven't put it into a bigger picture, and we don't see a greater context, then we're going to make the wrong decisions. We're going to rush to judgment. Our vision's going to be clouded. So יהודה *Yehuda* is teaching us this lesson. Comes from ספר נחלת אליהו *Sefer Nachlas Eliyahu*, but it's quoted in this beautiful ספר *sefer*, the שמחה עליון *Simcha Elyon* that I've been sharing with you this year in the פרשה שיעור *parsha shiur*. That if we if we rush and we lack clarity and we fail to have a context, we'll come to the wrong conclusion. But if we pause, and we review, and we put everything in place, and we see the סוגיא *sugya*, the whole picture and holistically, then we can come to the proper conclusion. And that's what יהודה *Yehuda* is doing for יוסף *Yosef*. He's setting the stage. He's making the argument. You ever see a lawyer make their make their closing argument? They're repeating so much of what they already said. But before the jury is going to reach their decision, there could have been deliberations for hours, for days, for weeks, for months. So you know the evidence that you saw a few weeks or months ago? You know the argument? You know the witness's testimony for weeks or months ago? Let me make my closing argument by organizing it for you. Let me capture it, let me start at the beginning, let me paint the picture, let me put it together, and a good lawyer is so persuasive and so compelling and literally draws a picture for a jury that it's obvious to the jury what the answer is. The jury, it's the picture is painted so clearly that the good lawyer has led the jury to simply come to the conclusion they saw right before them. But if there was testimony or arguments that were weeks or months earlier, and the lawyer just ends, Mr. Lawyer, you have a closing argument? Yeah, everything I said was right. Please come to the decision accordingly. So the jury is like, well, he said it was right. Anyone remember what he said? I don't even remember what we had for breakfast. I'm supposed to remember the testimony from from three months ago?So the closing argument is so יהודה *Yehuda* says, יוסף *Yosef*, may I approach the bench, your honor? I'd like to submit my closing argument. And my closing argument, we're going to have to take a step back. Let me paint a picture, let me give a context, let me remind you about all the variables and moving pieces. And this is a very, very important lesson for life, because are we not using our judgment each and every day? Do we not have to approach the bench of our lives, of our wives, I mean of our lives, and make decisions each and every day? When we want to lead people to the conclusion that we're hoping that they see as clearly as we do, we have to be מסדר *mesader*. We have to organize it, and we have to get them there the same way that we're there.The קאצקער רבי *Kotsker Rebbe* says something else that's amazing. I love this. I love all the קאצקערס *Kotskers*. I'm very drawn to, I feel very connected to the קאצקער *Kotsker*. So in this other beautiful ספר *sefer*, אמת ואמונה *Emes V'Emunah*, the Torah teachings of the הייליגע קאצקער רבי *heilige Kotsker Rebbe*. The קאצקער *Kotsker* says, ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*. יהודה *Yehuda* approached him. Who's him? אליו *Eilav*. The פסוק *pasuk* could have said, ויגש יהודה *Vayigash Yehuda*. יהודה *Yehuda* approached. יהודה *Yehuda* stepped forward. יהודה *Yehuda* came. Who is אליו *eilav*? To whom did יהודה *Yehuda* advance this argument? So the simple understanding, not that I'm calling anybody simple, is יוסף *Yosef*. יוסף *Yosef* is the individual with whom he's in conversation. יוסף *Yosef* is the individual to whom he has to make this compelling argument. יוסף *Yosef* will be the judge and the jury here. ויגש אליו *Vayigash eilav*. He approaches him. Who is the him? יוסף *Yosef*. The קאצקער *Kotsker* says no. נראה הפירוש, נגש אל עצמו *Nireh ha'peirush, nigash el atzmo*. יהודה *Yehuda* was approaching himself. יהודה *Yehuda* was approaching himself. What does the קאצקער *Kotsker* mean יהודה *Yehuda* is approaching himself? So I think what the קאצקער *Kotsker* means, what the קאצקער *Kotsker* is getting at is that if you're going to make an argument to somebody, you better check that you believe it. Because the most authentic, the most genuine, the most real, the most true, you know, others can see through. And if you're going to make an argument but you don't really believe it, you're only half bought in, if that much, then you're not going to be successful. ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*. יהודה *Yehuda* approached himself. יהודה *Yehuda* did a gut check on himself. יהודה *Yehuda* made sure he had the courage. יהודה *Yehuda* made sure he was ready to bear the response, the accountability, how יוסף *Yosef* would react, again not knowing it's יוסף *Yosef*. יהודה *Yehuda* made sure he believed what he was saying. יהודה *Yehuda* made sure that he was going to say it genuinely, authentically, and it would be received exactly the way that he said it.רב ויינפעלד *Rav Weinfeld*, I've been quoting recently often. רב ויינפעלד *Rav Weinfeld* is a רב *rav* in רמת אשכול *Ramat Eshkol* in ירושלים *Yerushalayim*, at a ישיבה *yeshiva* and a כולל *kollel*. A great תלמיד חכם *talmid chacham* and a fascinating individual. So רב ויינפעלד *Rav Weinfeld* uses this insight, he doesn't quote the קאצקער *Kotsker*, he quotes the שפת אמת *Sfas Emes* from the same בית מדרש *Beis Medrash*, and um, and he says the following. The פרשה *parsha* begins with יהודה *Yehuda* bringing the case to יוסף *Yosef*. But what was he saying that was new? He seems to be repeating the story, so we already gave רב אליהו דושניצר'ס *Rav Eliyahu Dushnitzer's* answer. He was being מסדר *mesader*, he was organizing it. It was a closing argument. But one thing that יהודה *Yehuda* did add was that he made himself an ערב *areiv*. What's an ערב *areiv*? A guarantor. He signed on as a guarantor. כי עבדך ערב את הנער מעם אבי, אם לא אביאנו אליך *Ki avd'cha areiv es ha'na'ar me'im avi, im lo avi'enu eilecha*. יהודה *Yehuda* calls בנימין *Binyamin* his father's בן זקונים *ben zekunim*, meaning because his brother died, because יוסף *Yosef* died, בנימין *Binyamin* is now the father's בן זקונים *ben zekunim*. יוסף *Yosef* once was his father's בן זקונים *ben zekunim*, who his father loved more than anyone else, spoiled. Originally when יוסף *Yosef* was the בן זקונים *ben zekunim*, it was ויקנאו בו אחיו *v'yikane'u bo echav*. His brothers were jealous. They hated him. But now יוסף *Yosef* sees, isn't it interesting? The very reason, the very driver of what made the brothers jealous of him, יהודה *Yehuda* is now quoting as the very cause for their affection and their protection of בנימין *Binyamin*. יוסף *Yosef* hears. I was the בן זקונים *ben zekunim*. I was the favorite child. I was the one my father had in his old age. I was the I was the favorite child. And because I was the favorite child, you threw me in a pit, you wanted to kill me, you sold me into slavery, you got rid of me. And now I should let בנימין *Binyamin* go because he's the בן זקונים *ben zekunim*? All of a sudden you've discovered affection and love. All of a sudden now you care about your father's relationship with the בן זקונים *ben zekunim*. That's not a source of jealousy and animosity and enmity. Now that's a source of responsibility and protection. When יהודה *Yehuda* added this point in the beginning of ויגש *Vayigash*, יוסף *Yosef* saw that they were doing תשובה גמורה *teshuva gemura*. In other words, the whole situation that יוסף *Yosef* had orchestrated was a platform for the brothers to have an opportunity to do not only תשובה *teshuva*, to not only be remorseful and feel bad about what they had done to him, but to do תשובה גמורה *teshuva gemura*. The רמב\"ם *Rambam* says what's תשובה גמורה *teshuva gemura*? Being back in the exact same circumstance, but doing the right thing instead of the wrong thing. So יוסף *Yosef* orchestrated things as closely as possible. There was only one brother with whom he shared a mother. He made things as close as possible, and the brother step up, יהודה *Yehuda* in particular, and now instead of hating the בן זקונים *ben zekunim*, they have affection and love for the בן זקונים *ben zekunim*. But it seems that for the most part, יהודה *Yehuda*'s just repeating everything that happened in מקץ *Miketz*, although he adds a few things, but he doesn't add things that had happened, he adds things that didn't happen. For example, יהודה *Yehuda* says in the beginning of פרשת ויגש *Parshas Vayigash*, he says that יוסף *Yosef* had asked them, היש לכם אב או אח *Hayesh lachem av o ach*? He says to this viceroy of Egypt, remember as I'm reviewing all of our history together, remember when you asked us do we have a father or a brother? It's only one problem. Go back to פרשת מקץ *Parshas Miketz*. Did יוסף *Yosef* ask that? He didn't ask that. He never asked that question. יהודה *Yehuda* also adds הורדנוהו אליו מסיבת עיני אליך, ולא יוכל הנער לעזוב את אביו ועזב את אביו ומת *horedanuhu eilav me'sivvas einei eilecha, v'lo yuchal ha'na'ar la'azov es aviv v'azav es aviv v'mes*. They were not said in מקץ *Miketz*. He never said that our father told us if you bring and you don't bring him back, I'm surely going to die. יהודה *Yehuda* is repeating conversations that never happened. They never happened. So what's going on? Where is יהודה *Yehuda* coming up with this from? What does it mean ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*? What does it mean יהודה *Yehuda* is approaching יוסף *Yosef*? Again, turning back one page, one פסוק *pasuk*, they're in the middle of a conversation. You're ever in the middle talking to someone you say, can I talk to you? You say, yeah, we're yeah. We're in the middle of talking. Just talk. Talk. You don't have to make an appointment. We're actually in the middle of a conversation right now. So what's going on with all of this? So that's what רב ויינפעלד שליט\"א *Rav Weinfeld shlita* explains based on this insight of the קאצקער *Kotsker* and also of the שפת אמת *Sfas Emes*. That when ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*, it should have said ויגש יהודה אליו *Vayigash Yehuda eilav*. Grammatically it would have been more correct, more proper to say ויגש יהודה אליו *Vayigash Yehuda eilav*. יהודה *Yehuda* approached him. ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*, the אליו *eilav* is he approached himself. And what does it mean he approached himself? It means that יהודה *Yehuda* was willing to be vulnerable. יהודה *Yehuda* wasn't telling יוסף *Yosef* things he said. יהודה *Yehuda* was saying this is how I heard them. This is my perspective. This is where I'm coming from. This is who I am. This is how I've interpreted, this is how I've experienced the conversation. And now when יוסף *Yosef* says, יהודה *Yehuda*, you're willing to be vulnerable? You're willing to let me in? ויגש *Vayigash*. Yes, we were having a conversation, but it was superficial, it was external, it was up here, it was diplomatic. But now I'm willing to be vulnerable. I want to let you in. I want you to hear where I'm coming from. I want you to feel what I feel. I want you to see things from my perspective. Now when יוסף *Yosef* sees that, he can't help but reciprocate. You've let me in, I'll let you in. You shared who you really are, I'm going to share who I really am. I'm going to let you in as well. יהודה *Yehuda*, ויגש אליו *Vayigash eilav*. יהודה *Yehuda* does this gut check with himself. יהודה *Yehuda* musters the courage. יהודה *Yehuda* ensures his authenticity. But I want to say one more thing to add on to רב ויינפעלד *Rav Weinfeld*. And he answers all those questions with that. The reason ויגש *Vayigash* is because he was taking the conversation to another level. He was saying to someone with whom he was in the middle of a conversation, Can I can I be really honest with you? Can I trust you? Can I confide in you? Can I let you in? Is this a safe space to be vulnerable? ויגש *Vayigash*. That's what ויגש *Vayigash* means. And אליו *eilav*, he was willing to be true to himself and to share the depths of who he was. But I want to apply this a little bit further. Every year I share with you, this is one of those Goldberg repeats every year דברי תורה *divrei Torah*, and I'm not going to apologize for it because it's so fantastic, it's worth repeating. The רמ\"א *Rama* quotes in שולחן ערוך *Shulchan Aruch*, he quotes from the רוקח *Rokeach*, that the reason we take three steps forward to begin our עמידה *Amida* is because the word ויגש *Vayigash* appears three times in the Torah. אברהם *Avraham* approaches God about סדום *Sedom*. יהודה *Yehuda* approaches God here about בנימין *Binyamin*, and אליהו הנביא *Eliyahu HaNavi* approaches God as well about the Jewish people, about the נביאי הבעל *nevi'ei ha'Baal*. And we've talked about in the past, I won't repeat this part, what the three represent, that when we come forward to דאווען *daven* to השם *Hashem*, we're דאווען *davening* even for the רשעים *reshaim* like אברהם *Avraham* דאווען *davened* for the people of סדום *Sedom*. We're דאווען *davening* for our brothers like יהודה *Yehuda* דאווען *davens* here for בנימין *Binyamin*. And we're דאווען *davening* against evil, we're דאווען *davening* for השם *Hashem*. דאווען *Davening* for השם'ס *Hashem's* own name that it should be protected and it should be made great. We take three steps forward, ויגש *Vayigash*. Wherever we were a moment ago, we take those three steps forward and now we are transported. We are in front of השם *Hashem*. You could be on the side of the New York State Thruway, you could be, if you have to דאווען *daven* on the edge of the golf course, obviously most preferably, you're in שול *shul*. But wherever physically your coordinates showed that you were a moment ago, when you take those three steps forward, you are teleported, you're transported, you are beamed up, you are now standing before the ריבונו של עולם *Ribono shel Olam*, ready to talk. And those three steps forward, we're emulating these three great people to use our power of speech to step up, step forward, step out, and to use it to lobby, to advocate, to make a difference. But I want to add, what I want to be מוסיף *mosif* this year is if you apply this inside of the קאצקער *Kotsker*, ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*, it means that when we take those three steps forward to דאווען *daven*, before we can talk to God, who do we have to talk to? Ourselves. Take a deep breath. Take a pause. ר' אדם אנגל *Rav Adam Engel*, who is the head of school at Catherine Day School, he led the middle school דאווען *davening*. It was arguably the holiest דאווען *davening* in our community. It was so beautiful. He got the kids, I think they're still doing it, they take three steps forward, they take a deep breath before השם שפתי תפתח *Hashem sefasai tiftach*. Every day in שמונה עשרה *Shmoneh Esrei* he would remind them, Three steps forward, take a deep breath. A deep breath before you can talk to השם *Hashem* you talk to yourself. Are we really present? Are we centered? Are we there? Are we mindful? The בעל שם טוב *Baal Shem Tov* famously said, we are wherever our thoughts are. So if you're דאווען *davening* שחרית *Shachris*, it's already at J&R carpool, your mind's already at work, your mind's already the to-do list, your mind's already packing for the flight, your mind's already the difficult conversation you have to have later. All of a sudden you get to the end of שמונה עשרה *Shmoneh Esrei*, you don't remember, did I say יעלה ויבוא *ya'aleh v'yavo*? Did I say על הנסים *al hanisim*? Did I say ושם תן טל ומטר לברכה *v'sein tal umatar l'vracha*? I don't remember. I don't remember anything I said. I don't remember how I got here. I don't remember turning one page. I don't remember saying one word. That's not a conversation. So we take that breath, ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*. I think this inside of the קאצקער *Kotsker* is that we begin with a conversation with ourselves. When I take those three steps forward, I'll let you in for a moment. When I take those three steps forward every day, I try to take one moment to think about what do I have happening today that I need to talk to Him about. I talk to myself. What's on tap today? What's on my schedule today? What responsibilities do I have today? Am I giving a difficult שיעור *shiur*? I ask השם *Hashem* for help to prepare it, that it flow, that the technology all work out. I'm having a difficult conversation? Do I have to take a difficult journey? Do I have to make a difficult decision? Every day, of course, there are things and people in our lives. רב שכטר *Rav Schechter* was here two שבתות *Shabbasos* ago, and we asked him about דאווען *davening*. He said, it takes me a long time to דאווען *daven*. If you stand next to רב שכטר *Rav Schechter* when he דאווען *davens*, or if you heard him בענטש *bench*, lead the בענטשן *benching* at שאלעשידעס *shalosh seudos*, he says every word like he's in a beginner Hebrew class. He knows ש\"ס *Shas* and פוסקים *poskim* בעל פה *ba'al peh*. It's unbelievable what he knows. I'll never know what he forgot. And he reads דאווען *davening* like he's a third grader. I had רב שכטר *Rav Schechter* on one side and my eight, nine, now nine-year-old son on the other side. And my nine-year-old son was reading faster than him. How could it be? He doesn't know Hebrew? He's got to take רב בערדי'ס *Rabbi Berdy's* crash course. He דאווען *davens* slowly and he shared with us why. He said, I have a lot of children, he has nine children קיין עין הרע *kein ayin hara*, and a lot of grandchildren, and a lot of תלמידים *talmidim*, and a lot of people who say, can you דאווען *daven* for me? Now, most people you say, yeah, no problem. And then we pretend we wrote down the name or we're going to think about the name, or we act as if we can memorize the name, we don't even know our own name, but we're going to pretend we know everybody else's name. Oh, tell me your name so I can דאווען *daven* for you. You need to write it down? No, no, no, no, I'll remember it. We don't remember our own name, but we're going to remember the names that people give us. But רב שכטר *Rav Schechter* when you give him a name, he means it. He דאווען *davens*. It takes him a long time to דאווען *daven*. So ויגש אליו *Vayigash eilav*. To take a moment and to first sit with ourselves, who am I? What do I have going on today? Am I really here? Am I grounded? Am I centered? This is the קאצקער *Kotsker*. Not ויגש יהודה אליו *Vayigash Yehuda eilav* to יוסף *Yosef*, ויגש אליו יהודה *Vayigash eilav Yehuda*. First we have to approach ourselves, be prepared, be mindful, be ready, and then we're ready to approach the ריבונו של עולם *Ribono shel Olam*. Then we're ready to go in. Then we're ready to go in.Okay, moving right along. פרק מ\"ה *Perek Mem Hey*, פסוק ג *Pasuk Gimmel*. So, יהודה *Yehuda* makes this compelling argument and יוסף *Yosef* is moved. He's moved. ולא יכל יוסף להתאפק לכל הנצבים עליו ויקרא הוציאו כל איש מעלי ולא עמד איש אתו בהתודע יוסף אל אחיו *V'lo yachol Yosef l'hisapek l'chol hanitzavim alav vayikra hotzi'u chol ish me'alai v'lo amad ish ito b'hisvada Yosef el echav*. Beginning of פרק מ\"ה *perek Mem Hey*, page 252. יוסף *Yosef* couldn't restrain himself. All stood before him, so he called out, clear the room. Give me the room. So no one remained with him when he made himself known to his brothers. There he is, he's got his advisors, he's got the cabinet, he's got the secret service, he's got the Navy officers, he's got the marines, they're all around him. And he gets so emotionally overwhelmed, he says, give me the room, clear the room. Now it's just him and his brothers. That's all that's left. ויתן את קלו בבכי וישמעו מצרים וישמע בית פרעה *Vayiten es kolo b'vechi vayishme'u Mitzrayim vayishma beis Pharaoh*. He starts to cry. He cried so loudly and his emotion resonated so broadly, it didn't matter he cleared the room because he couldn't clear מצרים *Mitzrayim*. And it was heard everywhere. It was heard everywhere. ויאמר יוסף אל אחיו אני יוסף העוד אבי חי *Vayomer Yosef el echav ani Yosef ha'od avi chai*. And יוסף *Yosef* then said those iconic, immortal words, the words that are supposed to make us shudder and shake and tremble. יוסף *Yosef* says, אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. I'm יוסף *Yosef*. העוד אבי חי *Ha'od avi chai*? Is my father still alive? ולא יכלו אחיו לענות אתו *V'lo yachlu echav la'anos oso*, and his brothers couldn't answer him, כי נבהלו מפניו *ki nivhalu mipanav*. They were so overwhelmed, they were so shocked, they were so startled. They couldn't move, they couldn't answer, they couldn't respond. They were so stunned. They were so utterly and totally stunned by this revelation, by this revelation. The מדרש *Medrash* tells us famously, אבא כהן ברדלא אמר אוי לנו מיום הדין אוי לנו מיום התוכחה *Abba Cohen Bardela amar oy lanu mi'yom ha'din, oy lanu mi'yom ha'tochecha*. Wow. In those two words, אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*, אוי לנו מיום הדין *oy lanu mi'yom ha'din*. Do you know what we're going to have to face? What we'll be accountable and responsible for when the world, the picture will come together for us? יוסף קטנם של שבטים היה ולא יכלו לעמוד בתוכחתו *Yosef k'tanam shel shvatim hayah v'lo yachlu la'amod b'sochechaso*. יוסף *Yosef* who was the smallest of the tribes and they couldn't withstand, they couldn't withstand his תוכחה *tochecha*, his מוסר *musar*. ולא יכלו אחיו לענות אתו כי נבהלו מפניו *V'lo yachlu echav la'anos oso ki nivhalu mipanav*. They were stunned and shocked into silence. They had nothing to say. וכשיבוא הקדוש ברוך הוא ויוכיח כל אחד ואחד לפי מה שהוא *U'ch'sheyavo ha'Kadosh Baruch Hu v'yochiach kol echad v'echad l'fi mah she'hu*. When God's going to play the movie reel of our lives and we're going to have to see what we did and pay the piper, we're not going to be able to answer. על אחת כמה וכמה *Al achas kamah v'kamah*. אוי לנו מיום הדין, אוי לנו מיום התוכחה *Oy lanu mi'yom ha'din, oy lanu mi'yom ha'tochecha*. The מדרש *Medrash* describes that the great rabbis would shake and tremble and shudder, they would cry when they'd read these words. אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. Such מוסר *musar* in those two words alone. The בית הלוי *Beis Halevi* famously says two מוסר *musar*. מוסר *Musar*? Where's the מוסר *musar*? אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. Imagine in the ישיבה *yeshiva* you give the מוסר שמועס *musar shmues*. In the בית מדרש *Beis Medrash* I went to, ישיבת רבנו יצחק אלחנן *Yeshivas Rabbeinu Yitzchak Elchanan*, YU, Wednesday nights, when I was in YU I never dreamt in a billion years that I would be invited to give the מוסר שמועס *musar shmues*. In turn Corona, I haven't been invited in person. Zoom. I guess I was low risk. They got me on Zoom. So the מוסר שמועס *musar shmues* is Wednesday nights. So imagine they ask somebody to get up and give the מוסר שמועס *musar shmues*. There's no fire, there's no brimstone, there's no this is everything you're doing wrong and we need to repair and if not we're going to burn in גהנום *Gehenom* and the world's caving in and what are we going to be? Imagine the whole מוסר *musar* you stand up and you say, אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. שכח *Shkoyach*. Can I get the honorarium now? I didn't get an honorarium. Can I get the אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. You still have 20 minutes. Nope, that's my מוסר שמועס *musar shmues*. אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. Where's the מוסר שמועס *musar shmues* in אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*? So the בית הלוי *Beis Halevi* says, you know where the מוסר שמועס *musar shmues* is? You know what a greater מוסר *musar* is? You know what the greater מוסר *musar* is? I've been warned that I've been telling too many stories of my own personal life, so at the risk of violating that rule and doing it again. A member of my family by marriage once got pulled over by police and called me while the police was writing up the ticket. And I reacted and responded totally incorrectly. I said, why were you going fast? And I can't believe you got pulled over. The ticket's going to be points, and it's going to cost money, the insurance is going to go up and... And the individual said to me, Ephraim, in my rear view mirror there's a police car with lights flashing. My heart is racing. Do you think I need you to tell me I shouldn't have been speeding? Do you think right now I need the lecture of that I shouldn't have been going too fast? Do you think I'm not filled with shame and remorse and regret and embarrassment? Did I call you to get a מוסר שמועס *musar shmues* about how to drive? It was 100% correct. 100% correct. Called me to say that's so annoying and I can't believe it. I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's no big deal, we'll figure it out. I blew it. I blew it big time. Thank God that individual chose to still be related to me by marriage despite my mistake. That's אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*, says the בית הלוי *Beis Halevi*. That's אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. The siren... the thing's flashing in the rear view mirror. I don't need you to give me the מוסר שמועס *musar shmues*. יוסף *Yosef* didn't have to sit there and say, and I can't believe you threw me in the pit, and I can't believe you sold me into מצרים *Mitzrayim*, and I can't believe for 22 years the anguish and the עגמת נפש *agmas nefesh* that you caused me and what you did to our father. You took years off his life. All he had to say was, here's the here's the sirens. אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*. אני יוסף *Ani Yosef*, and your last 22 years, that picture just became clear. And no one needs to say anything more for you to shake and sit there and tremble and be filled with shame and remorse and regret. And when the ריבונו של עולם *Ribono shel Olam* after 120 years, he plays back, you know, rabbis for the last 2000 years were giving this משל *mashal*. השם *Hashem* will play back your life. Okay, so 500, a thousand years ago people said, play back my life? How? It's not possible. What does that even mean? To have a record, to play it back a life... Now, Google could play back your life, and YouTube could play back your life, and Zuckerman could play back your life, and this could play... You don't have to wait till after 120 years. You're the social experiment. The whole world could play back your life right now while you're still alive. It's frightening. It's scary. It's shocking. It's shocking. Says the בית הלוי *Beis Halevi*, that's the אוי לנו מיום הדין *oi lanu mi'yom ha'din*, that is the אוי לנו מיום התוכחה *oi lanu mi'yom ha'tochecha*. ר' ישראל סלנטר *Rav Yisrael Salanter*, ר' ישראל *Rav Yisrael* said it a little bit differently. Every year, this is quoted by in קלם *Kelm* by his תלמידים *talmidim*, the אלתר *Alter* of קלם *Kelm*, he would מעורר *me'orer* his תלמידים *talmidim* with דברי המדרש *divrei ha'Medrash*, ללמד על המאור שבו יש ללמוד מדברי המדרש הנוקבים *l'lamed al ha'ma'or shebo yesh lilmod midivrei ha'medrashim ha'nokvim*. כשהגיע לפיסקה *K'shehigi'a l'piska*, and he would say the following, I'm not going to read to you the whole thing inside because there's a lot more I want to share. So I'll tell it to you outside. What he basically told them is, when you know you did the wrong thing your whole life and then you get caught. So there are people who visited the wrong places, there are people who visited the wrong websites, there are people who engaged in the wrong behavior. They knew it was wrong while they did it, and they were overwhelmed and overcome by the יצר הרע *yetzer hara*, and they thought they were above the law and they'd get away with it, and then it got revealed, and then they were exposed, and it's humiliating. But what happens when you think that you were right your whole life? When you don't think you did anything wrong, you thought what you did was right, it was correct, it was moral, it was ethical. You stood for what you think was right. And now 22 years later you see in retrospect that you thought you were engaged in a מחלוקת לשם שמים *machlokes l'shem shamayim*, you thought that you were fighting a noble fight, you thought that you were representing the Almighty, that He needed you to speak for Him. You thought you were fighting the real fight. The מחלוקת machlokes, the person you weren't speaking to, the fight that you had, the the breakup in business, in the family, in shul, the breakaway shul, the breakaway minyan, the breaka, the thing that you thought was so correct and so noble and so לשם שמיים l'shem shamayim and so beautiful, and for 22 years you ran with it, confident you were correct. And now the רבונו של עולם Ribono shel Olam in two words shows you that you were wrong all along.That's the יום הדין yom hadin, that's the יום התוכחה yom ha'tochacha. The יום הדין yom hadin and יום התוכחה yom ha'tochacha said רבי ישראל סלנטר Reb Yisroel Salanter, for the things that we know we were wrong, but we thought we could get away with, that's תוכחה tochacha, but we knew we were wrong. The biggest תוכחה tochacha, the most disturbing תוכחה tochacha, the earth-shattering תוכחה tochacha is for that which we thought we were right about. We held these opinions. We held these opinions about other Jews, this community or that community, the ones who wear those ימקה yarmulke or that ימקה yarmulke, the ones who wear no ימקה yarmulke. We thought we were correct around our שבת Shabbos and יום טוב Yom Tov table, in our conversation with our friends, in whom we wrote צדקה tzedakah checks to. We thought we were correct. We had an opinion, such a strong opinion. And it turns out when all is said and done at the very end, we realize we were wrong in the two words אני יוסף Ani Yosef. That's the יום הדין yom hadin, that's the יום התוכחה yom ha'tochacha, says רבי ישראל סלנטר Reb Yisroel Salanter. But I want to share with you another insight on these two words. It's a beautiful insight from the sefer מגיד יוסף על התורה Megid Yosef al HaTorah by רבי יוסף יהודה לייב סרוצקין Reb Yosef Yehuda Leib Srotsky. I told you who was visiting our community recently, his son moved to our community, my good friend Meyer Srotsky, אלי סרוצקין Ali Srotsky, my neighbor. So he's a ראש ישיבה Rosh Yeshiva in טלז סטון Telz Stone, not אלי סרוצקין Ali Srotsky, he lives on הליאך Haleach, but his father. And he gave me his ספרים sfarim, beautiful, יוסף יהודה לייב סרוצקין Yosef Yehuda Leib Srotsky. I told you my rule and my best friend מנדי Mendy in the back who costs me so much money I have to build bookcases. ברוך השם Baruch Hashem every time he visits he brings me ספרים sfarim. So you get me ספרים sfarim, I'm going to share them. They're not just for me, they're an investment for me to share with others. So he gave me the ספר sefer. So I want to thank him for that. So he says the following, הצירוף עם שניהם hatzeiruf im shneihem, אני יוסף האוד אבי חי Ani Yosef ha'od avi chai. We've been talking until now that the מוסר mussar is in those two words. The מדרש Midrash, רבי אבא כהן ברדלא Reb Abba Cohen Bardela said אני יוסף Ani Yosef. In that moment of the clarity that it all came together and in that moment the picture you saw the whole thing, אני יוסף Ani Yosef. And that moment was the מוסר mussar. How does it connect to the end of the פסוק pasuk? האוד אבי חי Ha'od avi chai. Yosef then asks, asks what is a very peculiar question, is my father still alive? שאל אותו יוסף בנשימה אחת Sha'al oto Yosef b'neshima achas. Yosef said in one breath, צרך טעם tzarich ta'am, we have to understand it. מן הראוי היה שאחר שנגלה זה לנפש כמו שהיזהר זה על זה, על כן לשאול בשלום אביהם. וכן לא יוכל לומר אני יחיד אבי, דאחר שנגלה ליוסף נכון לומר אבינו Min ha'raui haya she'achar shenigla zeh l'nefesh k'mo shehizhar zeh al zeh, al kein lish'ol b'shlom aviham. V'chein lo yuchal lomar 'Ani yachid avi,' d'achar shenigla l'Yosef nachon lomar 'Avinu'. First of all, why doesn't Yosef say, I'm Yosef, how are you? What's going on, brothers? Let me tell you about my life, your life. By the way, how's Abba, how's Tatty, how's Dad? But moreover, he should have said how's our father? What do you mean how's my father? ועוד הקשה בית הלוי V'od hiksha Beis Halevi, and what do you mean, is our father, is my father still alive? A moment ago, Yehuda's argument was, our father said if you don't bring back בנימין Binyamin, he's going to drop dead of a heart attack, he's going to surely die. So you know the answer to your question. A moment ago, Yehuda just said your father's alive. So your very first question is אני יוסף Ani Yosef, I'm Yosef, is my father still alive? What's going on? What's going on? So he says a very interesting answer. אדם בתוך ישיבה של ישראל יודע תמיד את מצבו הרוחני, שמיטה בדרך התורה מיד יאבחנו וידעו שמעשיו שאינו במקומו, ולפעמים אף יוכיחו על כך Adam b'toch yeshiva shel Yisrael yodea tamid es matzavo ha'ruchni, she'meita b'derech haTorah miyad yavchinu v'yedu she'ma'asav she'eino b'mekomam, v'lifamim af yochichu al kach. A person who's living in a moral and an ethical and a positive environment will be able to immediately measure if they've stepped out. When you realize everybody around you is so righteous, I look around and I say I finished דאווענען davening in three seconds, everybody else is still in the שמונה עשרה Shmoneh Esrei. Hmm, I wonder if I could concentrate more in my דאווענען davening. I already told you about the about the heroes of the Jewish people who scream יעלה ויבוא Ya'aleh V'Yavo when you're up to אדוני שפתי תפתח Adonai sfatai tiftach. The heroes of the Jewish people. על הניסים Al HaNissim. They want to make sure you you haven't finished your third step forward yet. They're up to על הניסים Al HaNissim making sure everybody remembers it's על הניסים Al HaNissim. So if you're דאווענען davening in a מנין minyan and you look around and you say, how come I'm finished and there's nobody else here done? That's a message, that's a flag. Maybe I need to concentrate more in my דאווענען davening. How come I'm always gossiping and everybody's shutting me down and nobody else gossips? Maybe I need to work on my שמירת הלשון shmiras halashon. Everybody else giving given צדקה tzedakah, I don't measure up. When you're in a positive, a good environment, the environment itself becomes your metric, your measure to evaluate how you're doing. אבל אדם בין אומות או דעת בין אומות יכול לילך מדרך ישר ולא שירגיש בכך Aval adam bein umos o da'as bein umos yachol leilech miderech yashar v'lo she'yargish b'kach. But if you're not in a good environment, if you're among negative influences, then you'll never know how you're doing. you'll mistakenly think you're doing fantastically well. You have no one against whom to measure yourself. You have no role model. There's no archetype. ככל שנתאחד מצרים כן גבר פחתו שם שמים וירדתו ואפילו אינו מרגיש בכך K'chol shenisached Mitzrayim, kein gavar pachto shem shamayim v'yeridato v'afilu eino margish b'kach. As much as Yosef says I learned from my father, אבי מורי גדלתי תרי\"ג מצוות שמרתי avi mori gidalti taryag mitzvos shamarti. So Yosef in פרו גרתי תרי\"ג מצוות שמרתי Pharaoh garti taryag mitzvos shamarti. As much as Yosef is confident that he's been uncompromising in his commitment to Torah and mitzvos, how could he really know? Maybe he's lost a step. Maybe he's watered down. Maybe he's not the passionate on fire person he once was. After all he's living in מצרים Mitzrayim. He's in the capital of טומאה tumah. He is in the capital of corruption of moral decay. כל כך חתרן יוסף מיראת החטא עד שמיד עם התגלותו בקול רם שאל האוד אבי חי בקרבי Kol kach chatan Yosef mi'yiras ha'chet ad she'miyad im hisgaluso b'kol ram sha'al 'ha'od avi chai b'kirbi'. So says הרב סורוצקין Rav Srotsky, אני יוסף האוד אבי חי Ani Yosef ha'od avi chai. He wasn't asking them I'm Yosef, is my father still alive? He was asking, wow, you're my brothers. Finally, I'm back in the בית מדרש beis medrash. Finally, I'm back around ערליכע אידן ehrliche yidden. האוד אבי חי בקרבי Ha'od avi chai b'kirbi. אני יוסף Ani Yosef, it's me Yosef, am I still who I once was? Have I lost my way? Have I lost my passion? האוד אבי חי Ha'od avi chai is my father still in me? עם בגדי מלכות של מצרים אפשר להבחין בתלמידו המובהק ובנו חביבו של יעקב אבינו Im bigdei malchus shel Mitzrayim efshar l'havchin b'talmido ha'muvhak u'vno chavivo shel Yaakov Avinu? אני יוסף האוד אבי חי Ani Yosef ha'od avi chai. I look very different now. I'm dressed like an Egyptian. He's not walking like an Egyptian, but he's dressed like an Egyptian. He says I'm the viceroy of Egypt. I have the garb of Egypt. האוד אבי חי Ha'od avi chai, I'm asking you as a favor to me, tell me, do you still see the Yosef underneath this royal clothing? האוד אבי חי בקרבי Ha'od avi chai b'kirbi. I was אבא'ס תלמיד מובהק Abba's talmid muvhak. I was the בן זקונים ben zekunim. I was the heir to be the ראש ישיבה rosh yeshiva. האוד אבי חי בקרבי Ha'od avi chai b'kirbi, do you still see him in me? That's why Yosef was able to withstand the pressure. That's why Yosef was able to remain who he was, because as long as he was in this negative environment, he remained nervous and anxious and concerned about its influence on him. The moment that you think I got it, I'm good, I can't be influenced, I won't be brought down, it won't impact me, that's when you're in trouble. But as long as you continue to say I'm at risk, I'm in danger, I need to double down on being the best me, that's Yosef's greatness. That's his godliness. וילך משה ויאמר לו אלכה נא ואשובה אל אחי אשר במצרים ואראה העודם חיים Vayelech Moshe v'yomer lo, elcha na v'ashuva el achai asher b'Mitzrayim v'er'eh ha'odam chaim. First of all, is this a מורא'דיגע פשט meiradige pshat? הרב סורוצקין Rav Srotsky visited Boca to give me his ספרים sfarim just so that we could have this פשט pshat. אני יוסף Ani Yosef. I've I've seen a thousand דברי תורה divrei Torah on those words אני יוסף האוד אבי חי Ani Yosef ha'od avi chai. Why my father? Not our father? Why is he asking a question when he knew the answer? Why is אני יוסף Ani Yosef? It's a whole new interpretation. It's amazing. תורה Torah is endless. Every time you study it, every time you learn it, you'll find new things in it. You could hear the same Parsha for 120 years in a row, but you'll never hear the same Parsha twice. It's amazing. תורה Torah is amazing. Amazing. אני יוסף Ani Yosef. He says I'm Yosef, and in the same breath האוד אבי חי ha'od avi chai, finally you're my mirror. Finally I have a mirror to look in to measure myself against. I've started to look like an Egyptian and to talk like an Egyptian and I still keep תורה ומצוות Torah u'mitzvos. We spoke last Shabbos about being assimilated Orthodox Jews. At חנוכה Chanukah, the מנורה menorah in our home is to try to protect and preserve us from becoming assimilated observant תורה Torah Jews, the danger and the risk of being כופר בעיקר kofer b'ikkar, confusing the עיקר ikkar and the טפל tafel. Yosef says, I'm still observant. I do the דאווענען daven every day, go to מנין minyan, I make ברכות brachos before and after I eat. I'm still observant. But האוד אבי חי בקרבי ha'od avi chai b'kirbi. But have I become so assimilated that I'm not recognizable? My core, my character, my identity. Am I still my father? האוד אבי חי בקרבי Ha'od avi chai b'kirbi. I love this פשט pshat. I really love it. I think it's a fantastic פשט pshat. I'll tell you one more and then we'll move on. Another שפת אמת Sfas Emes. The שפת אמת Sfas Emes. Yosef reveals himself, אני יוסף, האוד אבי חי Ani Yosef, ha'od avi chai. Let's keep going. I want to show you we're making progress. So we go to the next פסוק pasuk. They don't answer. Speechless, stunned into silence, they have absolutely nothing to say. Nothing to say. What happens? So what does he do? He continues. ויאמר יוסף אל אחיו, גשו נא אלי ויגשו Vayomer Yosef el echav, gshu na elai vayigashu. He says, come close. You can imagine when he said אני יוסף Ani Yosef, I'm just picturing the scene. You know what the brothers did? They went like this. Right? If I'm the brothers, I start moving backwards. Yosef might as well say, I just been diagnosed with Corona. Like if I'm Yosef, if I'm the brothers, I start inching backwards. I start moving back. Yosef says, whoa, whoa, relax. גשו נא Gshu na, come back. Brothers, come over here, group hug. ויגשו Vayigashu, group hug. We got this. ויאמר אני יוסף אחיכם אשר מכרתם אותי מצרימה Vayomer Ani Yosef achichem asher mechartem osi Mitzraima. Relax. I'm Yosef that you sold into Egypt. So the שפת אמת Sfas Emes says, that's why they should relax? He doesn't say I'm Yosef from the sandbox. I'm Yosef from the playground. I'm Yosef we used to play ball. I'm Yosef we had חברותא chavrusa in the בית מדרש beis medrash. Relax, it's me Yosef. Remember the family trips and vacations? Remember we had food fights and pillow, I'm Yosef. He says, relax, I'm Yosef. Remember me? Remember this? Remember me when you threw me in the pit and you sold me? Come, group hug. That they should relax about. And what does he add? He said on אני יוסף Ani Yosef, that's what stunned them into silence. Now because he repeats the words אני יוסף Ani Yosef, now they're gonna feel good? What's going on over here? So the שפת אמת Sfas Emes, my friend Rabbi Ilia David Goldblatt shared this through שמחת חבר simchas chaver, the שפת אמת Sfas Emes says, the word אשר asher can sometimes mean because. Because. אשר Asher doesn't mean remember that you threw me in the pit and sold me. אשר Asher means because. We see this at the end of the Torah. ישר כחך ששברת Yashar ko'achcha she'shibarta. God gives משה רבינו Moshe Rabbeinu a big שכויח shkoyach. What's the שכויח shkoyach you broke the לוחות luchos. אשר שברת Asher shibarta. שכויח Shkoyach because you broke the לוחות luchos. I have a Rebbe who says if a couple breaks their engagement, חלילה chalila, even after marriage because they're not meant to be, ישר כחך ששברת yashar ko'achcha she'shibarta. Sometimes you get a ישר כח yashar ko'ach when things are broken, if they're broken the right way, they can be put back together. People are more whole if they're broken the right way. So Hashem says ישר כחך אשר שברת yashar ko'achcha asher shibarta. says the שפת אמת Sfas Emes, you see the word אשר asher sometimes means because. So therefore, if that's the case, what's Yosef telling them? Come here, come close. Group hug. אני יוסף Ani Yosef. You see me today, the father that I am, the זײדע zeide that I am, the viceroy of Egypt I am, the spiritual giant I am. Do you know how I became this person? Do you know what caused me to emerge who I am? אשר מכרתם אותי מצרימה Asher mechartem osi Mitzraima. It's because you sold me. So I don't bear a grudge. I'm not angry. I don't bear a grudge. I'm not angry and I'm not going to get even. I am who I am אני יוסף Ani Yosef. I'm only who I am אשר מכרתם asher mechartem because you sold me into Egypt. It's not amazing. So this actually שטימט shtimt very nicely, it works very beautifully with what Rav Srotsky said. אני יוסף Ani Yosef. First I said אני יוסף Ani Yosef, I'm looking at the mirror through you, האוד אבי חי Ha'od avi chai is is Abba still alive in me. And now that I see that he is, come close. אני יוסף Ani Yosef. I'm only who I am. I went through what I went through. I became who I became because of the hardship, because of the hardship that you put me through. So it's not that I'm grateful you put it through it, but it's the reality. It's the reality of that that is who I am. And this is says. Also on Pasuk Mem Hey, Pasuk Dalet. Come close, come close. says Reb Zaidle Epstein whose grandson I met in the parking lot of Boca Raton synagogue. This parsha creates incredible connections. I quoted him, he's quoted in the Sitcheh Elyon, so I quoted him. And then I met his grandson who said, here are his sfarim. I heard you quoted my zeide. He was visiting from Lakewood, Brooklyn where you have to be from to visit Boca these days. And he said I heard you quoted my zeide, here are his sfarim, you don't have them. Anyway, this is not directly from his sfarim, it's from the Sitcheh Elyon. So he says the following. He says, From Rashi. What do you mean? Relax, I'm not going to hurt you. Come close. I'm the Yosef you sold. So he says, Yosef had a hakaras hatov to them. It's true that you had negative intent. It's true that you had negative intent, but it came out positive for me. So even when someone intends negatively for us, but a positive result comes out, we have to have a hakaras hatov. Anytime we experience a positive, we should feel a sense of hakaras hatov. Yosef is the the ultimate model of this. And that's what the psukim continue and say. He says, because there was a famine and God sent you before me, and now I'm bringing food back and he made me the moshel b'chol eretz Mitzrayim, and l'adon l'chol Mitzrayim. It's all for a reason. Hashem orchestrated the whole thing. You were just puppets. You were pawns. Hashem orchestrated it all. You feel shame and guilt? Okay, a little bit of that's good for you. You want to apologize? You should apologize and I forgive you. But know that my attitude is that you were just a pawn and a puppet. Hashem has a lot of agency he can use. And he used you to get me here. He used you to save the economy of Mitzrayim which would spare the world. He used you. So I therefore don't carry a grudge against you. So says Reb Zaidle Epstein, you see how far hakaras hatov goes. That gratitude is not only for the person who meant well to us, gratitude is something, a debt of gratitude is something that we even have to feel for the person who meant harm but it worked out well and there was a positive there was a positive result. Okay, perek mem hey, pasuk tes. Moving along. Turn the page, 254. מהרו ועלו אל אבי ואמרתם אליו כה אמר בנך יוסף, שמני אלקים לאדון לכל מצרים Maharu v'alu el avi v'amartem eilav, koh amar bincha Yosef, samani Elokim l'adon l'chol Mitzrayim. Quick, go and tell dad this unbelievable news, I became a doctor. Just joking. Go and tell dad I became a lawyer. Not just joking. Go and tell dad that I'm the אדון לכל מצרים adon l'chol Mitzrayim. Do you know who I became? The אדון לכל מצרים adon l'chol Mitzrayim. So the simple understanding of the words אדון לכל מצרים adon l'chol Mitzrayim mean, go tell dad that I became the master of all of Egypt. He thinks I'm dead. He doesn't really think I'm dead because Yaakov was inconsolable the whole time. But he thinks I'm gone, I'm missing, I've been on the back of milk cartons in Canaan for 22 years. And go tell him that meanwhile I'm אדון לכל מצרים adon l'chol Mitzrayim. I'm it. I'm the vice president. I made it. And I have a very high approval rating. I made it. They all love me. I'm אדון לכל מצרים adon l'chol Mitzrayim. says the Kotsker, that's not what it means. Listen to this Kotsker. Oh. Rav Menachem Mendel of Kotsk. כה אמר בנך יוסף שמני אלקים לאדון לכל מצרים, פירוש, יוסף אמר, אני עשיתי להשם יתברך לאדון לכל מצרים, שיכירו כל מצרים שם השם יתברך אדון בכל העולם Koh amar bincha Yosef, samani Elokim l'adon l'chol Mitzrayim, peirush, Yosef amar, ani asisi l'Hashem yisbarach l'adon l'chol Mitzrayim, she'yakiru kol Mitzrayim shem Hashem yisbarach adon b'chol ha'olam. So, unbelievable Kotsker. Yosef knows, you know what will make dad proud of me after 22 years? Not that I made the Forbes 400. And not that I'm the secretary of the Treasury. You know what's going to make him the most proud? That I've transformed Mitzrayim with kiruv. Read the pasuk again. כה אמר בנך יוסף Koh amar bincha Yosef. Here's what I want you to tell dad. This is what your son Yosef sent to you, that שמני samani, I made, אלקים אדון לכל מצרים Elokim adon l'chol Mitzrayim. I made God the Adon of all of Egypt. That I use this position and I wore a yarmulke, and I said Baruch Hashem. And I wasn't ashamed, I wasn't embarrassed, I wasn't apologetic to be who I am, and to bring God into the conversation everywhere I went. Dad, I know you'll be proud of me that I became the viceroy. I know you'll be proud of me that I broke out and I made it and I'm rich. I know you'll be proud of me that I've earned the respect of the whole nation. But I know you'll be the most proud of me when I tell you that like you, I follow in your footsteps. My mission and my goal is to transform the world to see Hashem everywhere. It's a whole new way to read the pasuk. Usually the chasidishe vort, chasidishe divrei Torah, I got in trouble once for saying this before. Someone who listens is very unhappy at me for saying this, but I'm not even sure that the rebbes meant that this is the pshat. This is an important lesson to teach. This pasuk is a great way to teach it, so I'm putting it in the pasuk. That's how I learn many of these chasidishe divrei Torah. This Kotsker I think might actually be the pshat. I love it so much, I think this Kotsker might be the pshat. כה אמר בנך יוסף Koh amar bincha Yosef, go tell dad this is the message of your son Yosef, that שמני samani that I placed Elokim God, לאדון לכל מצרים l'adon l'chol Mitzrayim. That that's my success. And that's what I'm proud of and that's what you should be proud of. That's who I am and that's where I've been and that's what I've been up to and that's what I want you to know. Was it not worth driving from Boynton for that Kotsker? You should drive from New Jersey for that Kotsker. Kotsker was unbelievable. What a Kotsker. So now what happens next? So go rush, go tell Tatty, go tell dad. Go tell Abba. Go tell him I'm alive and well, go tell him that we've got provisions and food. Go bring everyone down. It's going to be geshmak, it's going to be gevaldik. We're making a Jewish village in Goshen. It's not going to be around the the capital, you're not going to be in Vegas. You're going to be in the outskirts, we're going to have a little suburb. You're not going to be on the strip itself. We're going to have a a holy place. Going to make a little Jewish embassy. Go, go bring them down. So he tells them, what does he say? Turn the page, 256. Perek Mem Hey, chapter 45, pasuk chaf dalet. וישלח את אחיו וילכו ויאמר אלהם אל תרגזו בדרך Vayishlach es echav vayeileichu, vayomer aleihem al tirgezu badarech. He sent off his brothers and they went. ויאמר אלהם Vayomer aleihem and he says one last message. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. אל תרגזו Al tirgezu, don't become agitated on the way. What does it mean don't become agitated on the way? What does it mean? Don't become agitated on the way. So Rashi tells us, it means don't get caught up in your divrei Torah. You're going to get caught up in your divrei Torah, it's going to slow you down, it's going to make you vulnerable. You'll be so engrossed in your talking Torah, you're going to get lost. Torah is an enormous value, תלמוד תורה כנגד כולם Talmud Torah k'neged kulam, but there's a time and a place for everything. You're going to get so engrossed in your Torah, you're going to drive right off the road. You're going to make the wrong turn. Don't, and you're going to be slowed down. Get where you need to go. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. Go and go right away. That's what Rashi quotes, that is the pshat that's known by many. And there's a lot more to talk about there. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. But I want to tell you an amazing Modzitzer, the דברי ישראל Divrei Yisrael. Every week Rabbi Mursdorf now shares with me a דברי ישראל Divrei Yisrael to share with you. I'm just the one who has the microphone, but there's a whole committee who's giving you the parsha class. All the people who contribute the Divrei Torah, and I'm very indebted and grateful to them. So says the דברי ישראל Divrei Yisrael of Modzitzer. Listen to this. ויאמר אלהם אל תרגזו בדרך Vayomer aleihem al tirgezu badarech. He tells them don't become agitated, אל תרגזו Al tirgezu, don't become, רוגז rogez, don't become angry. Don't become agitated, don't become angry. You had to sit in coach, you didn't get upgraded to business. You were on the waiting list, they didn't get through it. Don't become agitated. Person sitting next to you needed the super seat belt extender. Don't become agitated. They lost your kosher meal, they didn't bring you the kosher meal. Yeah, they made you still wear a mask even though you had triple vaccinated, seven boosters. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. Don't become agitated, don't become agitated. But that's not what the, the דברי ישראל Divrei Yisrael says. It says in the Modzitzer, אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. בדרך החסידות b'derech ha'chasidus. כשאתה עובד לבורא יתברך על פי איזה דרך K'she'ata oved l'Borei yisbarach al pi eizeh derech. When you serve Hashem on your derech, when you serve Hashem in your way, in your way, כשאתה רואה שחברך אינו הולך על הדרך שאתה הולך k'she'ata ro'eh she'chavercha eino holech al haderech she'ata holech, but then you see your friend is going on a different derech. Your friend's derech is different. You wear a bekeshe and a shtreimel but your friend decides to wear kippah srugah and to be a religious Zionist, to identify with the modern Orthodox segment of the community, you wear the hat with the pinch this way, your friend decided to wear the hat with the pinch that way, to not wear the hat, send your kids to this school, they send their kids to that school, they chose a different derech. אל תרגזו עליו Al tirgezu alav, don't get angry. כי הרבה דרכים יש בעבודת הבורא יתברך שמו Ki harbei drachim yesh b'avodas haBorei yisbarach shmo. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. Whatever derech you're on, don't get angry that someone's on a different derech. This is my שער הקהל Shaar Hakohol. I should have put out a whole sefer about the שער הקהל Shaar Hakohol. All these divrei Torah that reinforce the notion that there's seventy ways to, שבעים פנים לתורה shivim panim laTorah. There were twelve שבטים shvatim and they each had their own gate and entranceway into the Beis Hamikdash. So much so by the way the Midrash tells us that when the, I don't want to get ahead of ourselves here, but when the sea splits, it doesn't split in that the water is a wall on either side with one lane. There are twelve lanes. It's a twelve lane highway. It's wider than Palmetto Park Road. And there's no potholes. It's not like the Van Wyck. It's unbelievable. Grand Central. Reason enough to move down to Florida. It split twelve lanes, twelve lanes because every shevet had the right to preserve its derech. We didn't blend them, we didn't integrate them, we didn't erase them. Each one was entitled to each derech, each one is legitimate, each one is is authentic. And then there's the Shaar HaKohol, where I happen to live, the 13th gate that says I take the best from all 12. And I try to integrate them and live with them all. No one's obligated. You can stay in your lane. If you want to stay on your derech, אל תרגזו בדרך al tirgezu badarech. Everyone's entitled to embrace their derech. Lakewood, Belz, Chabad, Chofetz Chaim, your YU, your your your this version of Ger, or that side of Ger, whatever your derech is, everyone's entitled to embrace their derech. But אל תרגזו בדרך al tirgezu badarech. You can't get angry at somebody who's on a different derech. Don't sit in judgment, don't get angry, don't try to make them conform. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. כי מחלוקת השבטים עם יוסף עד שמכרו בעד מחלוקת בדברים גשמיים, רק בדרך החסידות כמובן Ki machlokes ha'shvatim im Yosef ad she'machru ba'ad, lo hayta machlokes b'dvarim gashmi'im, rak b'derech ha'chasidus k'muvan. Why is Yosef giving them this message on their way back? This is unbelievable. Why is he giving them this message? Because he's saying to them, how did we get here? We got here, Yehuda, because you and I had a different worldview. I shared with you in previous years that Yehuda and Yosef were not simply, this wasn't petty sibling rivalry. Oh my goodness gracious, I just saw the time. This was not petty sibling rivalry. They weren't like arguing over who got the iPad, who gets to sit in the front seat. What were they arguing about? They were arguing over the future of the Jewish people, over the hashkafa of the Jewish people. Yehuda and Yosef were two enormous worldviews. We don't have time to review what it was now, you could listen online. It's an enormous מחלוקת machlokes in השקפה hashkafa, in דרך החיים derech hachaim. So מחלוקת machlokes about who was correct about the way the Jewish people should approach the world. So Yosef says, אני יוסף Ani Yosef. I love you, brothers. You were just Hashem's pawns and puppets. I was meant to get here. I'm not angry at you. But do me a favor. You're about to turn around to go back for this journey back home to tell dad the good news. And you know what I suspect is going to happen? You're going to point fingers at each other. It was your fault, it was your fault. I said to do it this way, and you should have done it that way. Why didn't it happen this way? But remember the מחלוקת machlokes is how we got into this trouble to begin with. Remember when you pointed a finger and you felt jealousy and envy? Remember? Anger is how it all started. So אל תרגזו בדרך al tirgezu badarech. When you walk away, when you turn around and start heading back, don't see the differences, the different derech you're each on. And don't be angry at each other for having a different derech. Embrace the differences, respect the differences, learn to be brothers with those differences. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. What a message in those three words. They're already, if you look at the pasuk וישלח את אחיו וילכו Vayishlach es echav vayeileichu. They already left. ויאמר אלהם Vayomer aleihem and he says wait. Three words. Wait. Calls out to them. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. We each read the Chumash and we have our own little picture in our mind. That's my picture. This is my movie version of it. They've already left, they're already walking away. He's running alongside the train. It depends what era you're, you know, working it in over here. He's running after them on the back of the horse. Whatever era, he's got to get his private jet to follow them on their jet. Whatever era you're, you know. But they've already turned around, they've left. וילכו Vayeileichu, they're already on the way. ויאמר Vayomer and he screams אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech, wait. Don't judge each other. That's what the דברי ישראל Divrei Yisrael, the Modzitzer understands it. It's unbelievable. Don't use Yiddishkeit as a weapon. Don't use your derech to blunt others. אל תרגזו בדרך Al tirgezu badarech. יחי אבך בעבדך, שהיחי אבך בשביל עבדך, שאתה עובד השם בדרך זה וחברך אינו עובד השם Yechi avcha b'avdecha, she'yechi avcha bishvil avdecha, she'ata oved Hashem b'derech zeh v'chavercha eino oved Hashem. I just realized I never finished the Rav Srotsky. I'm ending with this. I just realized. Got so excited to tell you how great a vort it was. I never finished it. Rav Srotsky's insight was that Yosef was saying אני יוסף האוד אבי חי Ani Yosef, ha'od avi chai, is my father still alive in me? And this is exactly what Moshe Rabbeinu says. When Moshe says I'm going back to Mitzrayim, אשובה אל אחי אשר במצרים ashuva el achai asher b'Mitzrayim, I'm going back to my brothers who are in Egypt, וראה v'er'eh and I will see האודם חיים ha'odam chaim, are they still alive? What do you mean are they still alive? Hashem's bringing you in to get them out. He's not sending you in to take out a bunch of corpses. It's not a rescue mission to go recover the bodies. You know they're alive. So what do you mean I'm going to check whether they're still alive? No, I'm going to check whether I'm still alive in them, whether Hashem's still alive in them. The same vort about Yosef. Okay. What could we do? There was so much more. We're not on next week. We resume two weeks from now. Until next time. First of all, tomorrow morning, no 10 minutes of meaning. Baruch Hashem there's a bris, but there is living with emunah. You can't live without emunah. You gotta live with emunah. Living with emunah, 8:45 for women tomorrow in the social hall. Tomorrow night, you don't want to miss Behind the Bima. Richard Bernstein, a blind justice, Supreme Court Justice of Michigan, blind, that's impressive, but that's not the most impressive part. He's run 25 full marathons and competed in an Ironman competition. He's been blind since birth. You gotta hear him tomorrow night behind the bima. Until next time, stay happy, stay healthy, and stay holy.
